my gym's IG always posts members in their stories and they pretty regularly shoutout this 17yo whose camera is almost at a POV ground level view of her ass in squat vids
Too much gear dude. Carries whole gym bag with him everywhere accesses: towels, headband, straps, protein bars, belt, water, protein shake, yoga mat, squat plug, headphones, AM/FM stereo with cassette and CD player, hairbrush, laptop, and squirrel
>married guy trying to escape his wife and kids for an hour
It's an unreal feeling coming home to your son after a workout and him absolutely greeting at your return, asking: "how was the sport?"
Love that little wildling.
His outfit generally looks like something he wears to bed, randomly he’ll come in with an undercut one day, then a shaved head the next, then he’ll wear a hat. Copies some ifbb champions workout, rests 5 minutes in between sets. Looks at rhe ground when walking around, shoulders in. Aways has some weird ticks from spending too much time alone and not realizing what it looks like in public. Goes to the bathroom and comes out with a piss spot from not shaking properly. Want more? I swear theres always like 10 of these guys floating around
>the one guy who can't find anything to do because the gym is totally crowded so just stands there looking at his phone and getting some water and trying to not seem lost till something opens up
The Lurker. >doing my thing as usual >look at the mirror for a split second >there's a man, behind two machines, staring at me >he looks for a few seconds, then walks off, still staring >he vanishes from the gym when I don't catch him through a reflection >never seen him exercising, he might as well not exist
>the middle aged overweight guy with an iPad propped up on the machines or db rack watching episodes of adult cartoons or some b tier drama pretending to work out probably just to get away from the wife he hates for an hour
Gay Paco >i'm 6'1", he's 2 or 3 inches taller >definitely more aesthetic body than me, bit i'm catching up >slicked back hair >clothing you can tell he spent time in front of a mirror picking out >trashy tattoos >sings bean song out loud with questionable lyrics such as "mi amigo yo quiero su numero" >would set off every lunk alarm in a 5 mile radius with how hard he throws shit to the ground >his final reps he sound EXACTLY like a gay getting fricked in the ass
I avoid eye contact with him at all times. There is no fricking way he has a healthy relationship with his papi.
kek, I wear jeans for my upper body days most every time, that's just how it has been for years.
When I had pants that didn't blow out in the ass from squats, I used to go full Tom Haviland and wear cargo pants for leg day and also strongman training. Got made fun of by the crew for it, I still remember having a 330 lb. stone in my lap and my pants were loose in the back, so the resident pro strongman who we trained with came over and yanked my pants back up just before I put that thing on the platform. After that, I moved to track pants for all lower body day shit.
My gym is filled with Instagram characters. The most popular however is a tiktoker with lime 50k+ followers. He's just turned 18 and left school. He's obviously a complete noob, but there's just something so funny about him. I try to snipe his videos whenever he's in. I would post his insta, but nobody ever does on here.
The crone.
She's old. So old the wall has s a distant memory, but still she lifts.
While others her age jazzercize in the pool, she's there. She's always there.
Why does she lift?
>that guy I see every night collecting bottles and cans out the trash and floor because he’s a poorgay looking for an extra buck
I respect the hustle but pity the man
>that borderline obese powerlifter/strongman with pink stringer, yellow shortshorts, sweatbands and twirly cartoon strongman mustache
I shit you not I am not making this up, been a while since I last saw him, so he must have moved or something.
>walk into the gym, dude is doing jumping jacks and some stretching >finish like half my workout >he's still doing some weird ass stretching >literally done with my workout, about to go home >he's doing the hip twerk thing
The fake natty (everyone who's bigger than me)
The summer jailbait with perfect proportions who started wearing a giant sweater because she was tired of getting leered at.
Uhm... you have an example of that? For science.
>For science.
School starts again next week. I'm worried the e-girls will stop coming in and I'll lose my motivation to go workout.
Unironically wanna get giga swole wripped like shredded cheese so i can pick up young girls at concerts and have their thighs along my head
How young are you talking
Anything upwards from 10, bonus points if there is a mother to impress or a fat dad to mog
my gym's IG always posts members in their stories and they pretty regularly shoutout this 17yo whose camera is almost at a POV ground level view of her ass in squat vids
>that quiet 5'11 guy with black shorts with an old samsung phone who only does compounds and never talks to anyone
he's probably studying some STEM field like engineering or works as a programmer
>some Science, Technology, Engineering and Mathematics field like Engineering
lost
Uh oh.
I have been stalking all of you, also you wear either a grey or a dark-blue t-shirt to the gym (you have many such shirts)
Nope. I wear a capeshit shirt or some ratty old v-neck tees
Oh shit
Holy frick
nice.
you got me with each of those except i talk to people
Stop stalking me but I'm only 5'10"
Me except 5'7" and work in cybersec
Literally me
Delet
5'8'', and I manage a medical marijuana grow operation.
me except i'm 6'3" and [spoiler]dropped out of STEM to become an artist
me but I'm 6'3 and my highest level of schooling was being homeschooled to 7th grade
wtf that's me.
I'm studying accounting and have an iPhone thank you very much.
Literally me
> the black guy with gyno
OMG IT´S GYNO!
>that zoomer jamming to the gym's pop music playlist.
>Autist that follows a godawful routine but looks better than everyone else.
>the three grad students that talk really loudly about astrophysics in between kind of heavy squats so everyone knows how smart they are
me but the other two grad students are also me just talking to myself
Too much gear dude. Carries whole gym bag with him everywhere accesses: towels, headband, straps, protein bars, belt, water, protein shake, yoga mat, squat plug, headphones, AM/FM stereo with cassette and CD player, hairbrush, laptop, and squirrel
You forgot my knee sleeves, elbow sleeves, wrist wraps and magnesia, but otherwise congratulations.
pajeets are based
Whatever help you sleep at night Ranjeer.
>the middle aged woman with a low hat and yoga pants holding in her mommy belly
>the balding manlet that is wasting his time
>the old perv in jeans walking 1 mph on the treadmill starring at girls
>the old guy with gloves and a cut off tshirt
>the obvious virgin trying to get in shape for girls
>the ass workout girl
>girl there with boyfriend doing machines but really just browsing the gram
>the married guy trying to escape his wife and kids for an hour
>the roided black guy that tries to talk to all the girls and never seems to get any
>the fatty you see for a week
>the fat girls that are always there chatting but never doing anything
>the improooover
>married guy trying to escape his wife and kids for an hour
It's an unreal feeling coming home to your son after a workout and him absolutely greeting at your return, asking: "how was the sport?"
Love that little wildling.
I wish for the best for you and and your wife's son
>>the obvious virgin trying to get in shape for girls
haha, could you describe this one some more? need to check something...
His outfit generally looks like something he wears to bed, randomly he’ll come in with an undercut one day, then a shaved head the next, then he’ll wear a hat. Copies some ifbb champions workout, rests 5 minutes in between sets. Looks at rhe ground when walking around, shoulders in. Aways has some weird ticks from spending too much time alone and not realizing what it looks like in public. Goes to the bathroom and comes out with a piss spot from not shaking properly. Want more? I swear theres always like 10 of these guys floating around
Not necessary. You've described me quite accurately.
kek this is me but I'm actually jacked and one of the strongest guys at the gym
>the one guy who can't find anything to do because the gym is totally crowded so just stands there looking at his phone and getting some water and trying to not seem lost till something opens up
>the obvious virgin
Elaborate
Please stop watching me on the camera
>the married guy trying to escape his wife and kids for an hour
This is me, oh the bliss of having 1.5 hours to myself. Unironically what keeps me going to the gym.
>the fatboy simp that loudly comments to his friend that I must have packed a prosthetic dick in my shorts
The fatboy simp can also be frequently seen at the counter if the worker is cute.
>boomer couple who plays shitty music on their phone speaker and doesn't re-rack weights
>guy who wears basketball shorts, wired earbuds and hasn't progressed in months
The two loners who independently show up to the gym at 4:45 am for the sole purpose of being alone
The Lurker.
>doing my thing as usual
>look at the mirror for a split second
>there's a man, behind two machines, staring at me
>he looks for a few seconds, then walks off, still staring
>he vanishes from the gym when I don't catch him through a reflection
>never seen him exercising, he might as well not exist
>>>/x/
>the middle aged overweight guy with an iPad propped up on the machines or db rack watching episodes of adult cartoons or some b tier drama pretending to work out probably just to get away from the wife he hates for an hour
There's 50 y.o. Mexican ex-convict at my gym that helps all the zoomers and calls them "son" and "sweetheart" and yells when they PR
Gay Paco
>i'm 6'1", he's 2 or 3 inches taller
>definitely more aesthetic body than me, bit i'm catching up
>slicked back hair
>clothing you can tell he spent time in front of a mirror picking out
>trashy tattoos
>sings bean song out loud with questionable lyrics such as "mi amigo yo quiero su numero"
>would set off every lunk alarm in a 5 mile radius with how hard he throws shit to the ground
>his final reps he sound EXACTLY like a gay getting fricked in the ass
I avoid eye contact with him at all times. There is no fricking way he has a healthy relationship with his papi.
kek, I wear jeans for my upper body days most every time, that's just how it has been for years.
When I had pants that didn't blow out in the ass from squats, I used to go full Tom Haviland and wear cargo pants for leg day and also strongman training. Got made fun of by the crew for it, I still remember having a 330 lb. stone in my lap and my pants were loose in the back, so the resident pro strongman who we trained with came over and yanked my pants back up just before I put that thing on the platform. After that, I moved to track pants for all lower body day shit.
>Frickboi with pulled up cotton shorts who’s jacked but never actually lifts and spends hours using different mirrors to look at himself.
>Old asian dude who sits on a bench for an hour and does nothing but stretch
>”The Collector” who brings six sets of dumbbells to the incline bench just to use the barbell
>Guy with an obscenely large camo backpack. What he’s got in there is a mystery.
>”The Walker” 5’6” white guy who glides around the gym and never actually lifts
>two nerds, one struggling to bench 95lb and the other somehow putting up 245 for reps
Kek the two nerd characters are so funny usually paired with
you can tell one of them is helping his buddy get into gymming but they're always both super friendly and talking about some niche nerdology
>the jokester who just memes around inbetween sets and makes people laugh but is obviously very depressed
>that guy who just stares into the distance between sets
wait i do this am i outing myself as a gym moron?
No and stop being so insecure. Stare at a roastie’s ass instead.
>the super fit 65 year old gilf with tree trunk thighs and her fat husband with a big beer belly who just walks on the treadmill for an hour
>400lb boomerbeast on the chest press machine for 30 minutes to do 3 reps total
>the guy who poses like a fricking moron every time he's done with a lift
>like not even flex posing just posing
It's me. And I will reclaim my name
Young South American or black grill. Every day is hip thrust day. Every exercise is hip thrusts. The Smith Machine is now the hip thrust machine
This but its usually a 5'0" skinny white girl
>that guy doing leg presses when you walk in and is still doing sets when you leave
>the fatty that's actually making effort at cardio and going full force at it for over an hour and a half
GMI
My gym is filled with Instagram characters. The most popular however is a tiktoker with lime 50k+ followers. He's just turned 18 and left school. He's obviously a complete noob, but there's just something so funny about him. I try to snipe his videos whenever he's in. I would post his insta, but nobody ever does on here.
I feel like someone would get barked at for setting up a frickin tripod to film their shit at my gym
>that dude with huge legs who never works any other muscles
I always wonder why when I see him.
SS claims another...
Kek
He’s a bottom.
Hey it’s me!
>that boomer who looks like gary busey and only does machines with bad form
The crone.
She's old. So old the wall has s a distant memory, but still she lifts.
While others her age jazzercize in the pool, she's there. She's always there.
Why does she lift?
cougar
>the dyel who asks everyone how many reps they have left.
>the guy you make eye contact with for just a second too long
that guy who brings milk to the gym and only does squats
>the skinnyfat girl with scars up and down her arms thinking getting in shape will cure her depression (spoiler, it won't)
>that manlet who's stronger than me
He's still short. You can make yourself stronger. You can't make yourself taller.
you can
I LIVE Black folk
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
>that one skinny fat anon doing starting strength and resting 10 minutes between sets
And it ended up just making him fat fat
that one hot girl that makes you hesitant to use the equipment after her because you don't wanna be seen as pervert
Another variation:
>that one 6/10 thot who works out in a non-sports bra and hogs the benches with her other thot friend and thinks she’s hot shit
That's a big reason I quit public gyms, friday night gym thots that are hoping to get a gym bro to take them out on a friday night for free drinks.
that one girl who gets mogged by other girl but try to compliment by doing harder excercises
that one girl who doesn't wear panties
>that guy I see every night collecting bottles and cans out the trash and floor because he’s a poorgay looking for an extra buck
I respect the hustle but pity the man
>that one gym thot who wears a sports bra constantly and her breasts are literally hanging out trying to escape that stares at me constantly
>the guy at the gym who could be high
>that borderline obese powerlifter/strongman with pink stringer, yellow shortshorts, sweatbands and twirly cartoon strongman mustache
I shit you not I am not making this up, been a while since I last saw him, so he must have moved or something.
>the guy who makes loud sex noises but then you find out he has tourettes
>the 45lb dumbbell deadlifter
the warmupgay
>walk into the gym, dude is doing jumping jacks and some stretching
>finish like half my workout
>he's still doing some weird ass stretching
>literally done with my workout, about to go home
>he's doing the hip twerk thing
Bros why does he even come to the gym?