hello brothers. i’m really struggling with something. i have gotten relatively IST over the years. it has gained me attention from women, but i can almost never turn that into anything.
i feel like they expect a jock, for me to be a bit wienery and dominant or whatever. however i’m just a big friendly and very autistic dude. every time they figure this out they drop me while i am busy falling for them. i am not the butthole they are looking for and seem to only attract these type of girls. what gives? it’s damaging me, i get invested quickly and before i know it they reject me because i didn’t meet their expectations/idea of me
I hate when I express an insightful opinion and people say “shut up and dribble you jock” due to my height and athletic physique
There's no way anyone has ever said that to you.
Imagine if someone just went:
>hey why don't you just go frick some hot women with your huge wiener?
Buff popular jocks like me that drive loud muscle cars but also have a secret deep philosophical side that only comes out during my most vulnerable moments aren’t represented enough in films
Truly society is unfair to lifters
Don’t chase girls man let them chase you be friendly but keep your distance show interest, compliment them make them laugh, smile, and just be around but not attached focus on yourself and learn to grow in life when you find the one it will just click. Trust me you don’t want those girls who have artificial expectations of men because those are the types girls who will be your downfall.
>those are the types girls who will be your downfall.
well yes that’s what happened to me again. i didn’t chase her for a second, she came onto me rather aggressively only for her to reject me later. i suppose it weeds out the low quality women but it sucks
Trust me you don’t want to be with a girl like that one minute they are 4 u and next they’ll throw you to the wolves once you are no longer useful to them and hop on the next guy leaving you to fend for yourself.
but they never do any better after me lmao!
If you’re a self respecting man who ain’t some sleeve bag or doormat of a guy than chances are they might never do better than you especially if they become addicted to power tripping or sex. Trust me man burn the bridge move on you will the one who makes you look back at all the others and laugh. A king knows his worth he doesn’t go looking for it from others.
i’m petty in that i make sure the next girl i get with is more attractive than the previous to make her seethe
yeah i guess you’re right. i made the mistake of thinking she was different, she wasn’t into partying and instead likes museums, reading and even some lifting. i guess deep down they are still the same.
>Don’t chase girls man let them chase you
That's how you end up an adult kissless virgin
Yea actually it’s not what makes you into kisses adult virgin is being some girls yes man/b***h who is to anxious to demand respect and stand up for yourself that you just get friend zoned and watch while other dudes take turns on the girl you got a crush on until it’s to late.
>Yea actually it’s not
It absolutely is.
I am the prime example since I am that adult kissless virgin. I just went with that "don't chase girls let them chase you" meme and guess what? Literally nothing ever happened
Ok you don’t do that literally you know it’s just a saying. Obviously you have to show interest and court someone you like and lay it down… the saying just means don’t chase girls who have no interest in you and wouldn’t chase you back. If all you need is to lose your virginity that’s easy go to a club or social hangout spot and chill and spark up a conversation with someone and smile, laugh.
I've been to countless clubs and spoke with a lot of women in various other social events as well. Never even kissed, let alone had sex.
We’ll than you need to work on your execution and look at yourself and ask yourself what would make you stand out. Trust me there’s someone out there where I’m from girls willl grab your shirt and pull your hand to them while you walk through the club.
It ain’t a mistake if you learn from it the ones who can hurt us and deceive us are the ones who say they will never do it. Keep a girl arms distance and take your time dissecting what she wants and her motives and background. You see red flags or signs of suspicious behavior cut your losses before you get burned. This day an age you can’t trust no one not even yourself sometimes.
>girls willl grab your shirt and pull your hand to them while you walk through the club
I sincerely doubt that happens to any man who isn't tall/very attractive
I mean obviously there are factors involved that come into play. But if you take care of yourself and dress proper and know how to make someone laugh you can go far
>you can’t trust no one not even yourself sometimes
das rite
Except it's not, because I don't chase girls either and I'm nowhere close to a kissless virgin.
"Don't chase" doesn't mean don't try or literally never talk to them you fricking idiot. That's what you wanted to hear though so that's how you chose to interpret it. Sad, many such cases.
I talk to them regularly. Mere talking does nothing, you have to actively show interest and "chase" for anything to happen
>you have to actively show interest and "chase" for anything to happen
So you admit you're showing no interest then?
And no, showing interest and chasing are not the same thing. You fricking idiot. Way to just casually admit you've been shooting yourself in the foot through your own inaction all these years.
I won't pretend like I'm some PUA gay who approaches 50 times per day, but I have showed interest many times and I got nothing but rejections for it
Stop being a "nice guy".
Get in touch with your dark side and aggression and use it when you should.
This is my biggest problem.
How do I stop being a "nice guy"?
you can be kind and still get laid, just don’t be a doormat. how is changing yourself to an butthole for women any better
I have no clue, I had zero women which is why I ask this, and from my experience being kind didn't result into anything remotely intimate ever
I think the terms "nice guy" and "butthole" are misleading. It's more about having a dominant or submissive personality. You can take charge of situations and conversations without being an butthole. This is what girls mean when they say they like confident guys. Guys who seem like they are in command of their own life and surroundings.
yeah, that makes more sense. you can be confident with a dominant personality and still not be an butthole and do very well with women. if you were always an butthole and it works on women, more power to you. at least you’re being your true yourself instead of pretending to be something you’re not
Literally me.
Spend years being ugly autist. Managed to get IST and grew into my face. Now chicks legit throw themselves at me and I just freeze lmao.
Stop being a simp. You have leverage. First of all, you're probably more fit than most of your social group if not all of them and you have multiple women interested in you. You can still be kind and assert dominance. Talk about other women with whoever you're interested in, don't give them too much attention seeing as they are nothing to you yet. Just be more assertive, act disinterested but still enticed and get them jealous
>Just be more assertive, act disinterested but still enticed and get them jealous
Aren't all these incredibly contradicting things? Be assertive and disinterested and enticed and get them jealous. What? Do I have to become some kind of bipolar schizo?
Yeah, you're right. I'm ESL.
What i mean is:
Be assertive and talk what you feel (unless you're a fricking schizo). Play a part in social interactions and preferably shift them.
Act disinterested because if a woman feels that they have you under their thumb then they won't see any reason yo take things further. Don't overcompliment her, don't aknowledge everything she does.
Be inticed means that you should flirt with her a bit, and tease her.
Getting them jealous is also easy, just talk with one of her friends and make her laugh, if she feels she is the only one interested in you then she won't really maintain that interest.
I've had like 3 girls reject me saying they aren't interested but at the same time as they said no said I was "stunning" "disgustingly sexy" and "look lush"
they also were shocked how polite and nice I was and really appreciated how I took no for an answer. they complain about these pushy guys but clearly they're giving sex to them and not to me??
should I unironically start telling women that I'm going to rape them like prostitutes or something? bros wtf women are full of shit
Maybe they were just taken anon? I don't know; girls can be and often are full of shit (as are guys) but if you take every rejection super personally you're not gonna get anywhere.