>Feel motivated to find new hobbies. >Feel motivated to lose weight. >Feel motivated to return to education

>Feel motivated to find new hobbies
>Feel motivated to lose weight
>Feel motivated to return to education
>All ruined as soon as someone criticizes my decisions for even a second

Am I just anti-social? Why do I feel motivated to be a better person when no one cares but revert back to self-destructive malaise and depression once people pay attention to me? I've learned to force myself to do things anyway but holy frick as soon as someone even acts snarky about my lifestyle choices I feel like giving up.

I genuinely considered stopping my weight loss when my sister said I looked "less porky" (lost 105lbs, no longer obese), as if her compliment was a backhanded comment, what's wrong with me?

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  1. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Am I just anti-social?
    Lol you hope! No you are just a weak coward loser

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >No you are just a weak coward loser
      Literally what is the difference? Insults unironically feel more validating and honest than pretending I'm better because I'm different. Feels less fake and dishonest than someone complimenting me for not being pic related.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        what the frick u talking about?
        You are weak ass man loser, do you like being like that? If yes then go on.
        If not change

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Being a dismissive moron is reductive, but your post motivated me to be better just so I don't end up like you.

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            I am better than you

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        You are suffering from chronic depression and mental illness. I say this not to mock you but to say that I've also been there (but not as bad as you). Get a therapist who can keep you in check, get antidepressants. Stop browsing IST.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          dont get meds

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >source: trust me bro I'm a guy on the internet who's never read an article past a headline in my entire life.

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              dont you have a discord server to mod?

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >source: I accused you of being a whole character in my head I made up and I don't like that guy so you're wrong about everything now.

                >This is the kind of logic I apply to all my beliefs including my stance on meds because my IQ is about 74

                >I'm the smartest guy Alive.

                >I'm gonna give shitty medical advice on the internet about things I know nothing about now.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                this

                dont you have a discord server to mod?

  2. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    You're probably just insecure. Insecurity leads you not to trust your own direction and judgements, and so you place a disproportionate and unjustified amount of weight on the judgements of others, but this logic is flawed for many reasons, and in fact it's not logic at all, but runaway, untempered emotion that blinds you to logic. Your perception of the self is overly magnified, and you struggle to see yourself from any other perspective but a critical one. You don't see yourself in the same way as any other person, as one deserving of empathy, kindness, respect, the benefit of the doubt; you are an outsider within your own mind. A self-made pariah that must be judged with a scrutinizing lense.

    You might need therapy to get over this. It isn't healthy, productive, or realistic. You are a person, just the same as any other, and it's not even that you "deserve" all the same allowances as you might give others, but that your perceptions blind you to reality, which is the basis from which any meaningful change must start from. Even if you can maintain habits without the critical mirror of others to reflect upon, your mental state will not improve, and so relapse is likely. Consider that a "diet" is not a temporary measure just to lose weight, but the declaration and adoption of a new way of life. In order to improve, you must adopt that new way, and break yourself free from the shackles that have held you back. The mental shackles are the strongest. I hope you take that to heart, and put the work into your mind and soul that you've set out to put into your body and habits.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Why aren't more posts on /adv/ like this?

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Because most people here don't deserve this level of effort. Can't tell you how many times I've bothered, and either been shouted down by someone who didn't want help, just vindication of their predetermined position, or been locked into a million "whys" by someone that refuses to accept answers and just wants to weasel out of reality. Also most questions here are dumb as hell, like "is it litrully over bros? should I just kms right now?". Good questions by reasonable people get good, readonable answers.

  3. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Hmmmmm, so how much positive reinforcement do you get?

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      By default, nobody cares what I do, so I don't get positive reinforcement that isn't me creating bullshit reasons to be a functional adult. I was beaten down as a kid/teen and was convinced I was a braindead "special kid" who would not be capable in the real world. Trying to break out of this has been hard.

      It didn't help that I browsed shitholes like LULZ and wizchan to cope with my loserdom from age 12-20.

  4. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    The term "anti social" is more closely defined as criminal. People coopted in every day speak to mean "doesn't like people". Either way, no one fits into a tiny box like you're saying. It's not some thing you just have and are doomed to. People act like disorders are things you catch like a cold and not personality traits/experiences/reactions that are formed and trained, and can be unformed and untrained. Your brain is extremely dynamic. It changes with every thought and action.

    And in your case, you're just extremely insecure and self doubting and care too much what others think and can fly into a self hating spiral over the slightest mean comment.
    Be better.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >And in your case, you're just extremely insecure and self doubting and care too much what others think and can fly into a self hating spiral over the slightest mean comment.
      The problem is despite being previously aware of this, I still feel the need to believe the self-hate, because it feels more warranted to believe I have debilitating flaws that can be corrected than to believe I was born dysfunctional and I'm inherently incapable. I feel like I'm lying to myself if someone insults me and I dismiss the insult as just an insult (despite this making no sense to do, and doesn't align with reality at all in some cases)

      Both feel cathartic for some reason, but the former is slightly more useful than the latter.

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