Fit I've fucked up. >Be me. >27 working in sales. >Mostly phone calls work on commission

Fit I've fucked up
>Be me
>27 working in sales
>Mostly phone calls work on commission
>In the office I'm kinda know as 'that guy' people know I exist but not many know my name
>Keep to myself, a bit of a push over, never invited to Friday night drinks with colleagues
>Want to seem more of an alpha in the office
>Hatch a plan to call myself on office phone from my cell phone and pretend I'm having an argument with an irate customer
>Phone goes off and I answer having a loud one way conversation so others can here

>Good afternoon anon speaking, just so you're aware all calls are recorded for training and quality purposes
>Sir, if you keep using that language with me I will terminate the call
>People start looking to my work space, I raise my voice to get more attention
>I can deal with this complaint, but you have to be reasonable with business constraints
>Colleagues stop working and listen to my call
>Your business is appreciated, but something's are out of my control, but I will endeavour to fix this
>My office manager is now listening, time for the coup coup de grâce
>Sir, I told you if you keep using abusive language I will be forced to end the call
>Hang up my phone, and go back to typing on my spreadsheet like nothing happened, feel the whole office staring at me. Pure silence just the odd office phone ringing
My office manager breaks the silence
>"Hey anon, what was that all about?"
>You know how it is, entitled customer thinks they are right and begins to berate sales staff

For the first time since I've worked for this company he shoots me a smile, and for the first time I feel like people want to talk to me
>"Ya know what anon, that call would be a brilliant example for our office training next week and how to handle difficult customers"
He's going to play it next Monday for staff training, and my colleagues are going to hear me yelling to no one.
My boss turns around but before he does he finishes with "well keep you're head up champ"

Wtf do I do?

  1. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Never show your face there ever again.

  2. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Act autustic, become autustic lmfao you're fucking fucked anon XD

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I'm pretty sure the office thinks I'm autistic anyway. I just wanted to be noticed at work and now everyone is going to hear me yelling to myself

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        maybe not if you fess up

  3. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    You are retarded. There is no reason to do some stupid shit like that to gain the awe of your work peers. They don’t matter, you shouldn’t stay at a job for more than 2 or so years anyway unless you’re okay with getting paid less than others with the same experience level and skill set. Your only option is to quit and save yourself the shame of facing these people when they realize you’re a raging autist, or to stay and face the people who will see you as a raging autist and ignore/make fun of you even more.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Why are you replying to a larp/pasta?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        I didn’t ask, and I don’t care.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      He was actually in a really good position, free of any workplace drama or political BS.

  4. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Just play the tape anon, then blame it on technical difficulty. Give them a brief summary of the scenario. Your colleague won't care enough to suspect otherwise.
    Also fuck off my board you retarded slide moron.

  5. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    SAVED. it's over OP. commit ack

  6. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I love you autists so much

  7. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    "Whoops looks like the recording software screwed up. Probably just a fraudster using a spoofed number, sometimes that causes electrical infetterence"

    Its literally that easy anon, normies are that dumb

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Will that work? I'm worried that my colleagues will hear the phones ringing and chatter from my cell phone when I rang my office phone?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        It's just an echo due to electronic signals being co-mingled from close by cell towers

  8. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Please let this be real and not a larp

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I just wanted to come across as more of a no nonsense kinda guy

      It's just an echo due to electronic signals being co-mingled from close by cell towers

      Fuck man, I dunno they already think I'm a bit weird. If I started stuttering technical jargon at them they'll think I'm more autistic

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Is there any way you can sabotage the recording devices? If not, come Monday morning just break your boss's computer without making it too obvious so he'll be preoccupied the rest of the day.

  9. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

    This board is for ISTness.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      This board made me believe that gym guys get attention, so I tried my hand at being that 'gym guy'. Leaving my protein powder and shaker on my desk. But all that fucking achieved was an informal warning because people complained about the smell of unwashed shaker bottles.

  10. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >Want to seem more of an alpha in the office
    >Hatch a plan
    Should've flex'd a cep

  11. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    The good news is that you're still an example for staff training.

  12. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    The best thing you can do is try to talk your manager out of doing the office training, then, the only person who'll know you're autistic is the manager, or maybe you can't try to eliminate evidence that the call existed, along with other calls to make it less suHispanicious

  13. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    larp but
    he could buy a burner phone (or multiple) and then call himself again a few more times, and these times proceed to have a normal sounding conversation. That way there will be more blank recordings and with any luck they'll chalk it up to some weird error

  14. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >Be office retard
    Your life is an episode of Seinfeld.

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