For years, I had a phobia about going to the gym

I finally managed to overcome my fear 1 and a half year ago. I don't know if people are prone to this kind of anxiety, maybe some scroll through this board and dream of going to the gym but don't go for fear.

I'll answer your questions.

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  1. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I've been going to the gym for 4 years but only at night because I don't wanna interact with people. My entire sleep schedule is fricked up because of it and I have no good reason to change that.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I had a friend with this problem. I tried to explain to her that no one at the gym cares about your existence. Everyone is there for his own self-improvement, and most people are wearing headphones or earbuds, in their own world. She wasn't convinced.

      I go during the day, and I still don't interact with people 99% of the time. Basically only when I have to ask someone how many sets they have left or if they're using a piece of equipment. I recommend just going during the day and dealing with the discomfort. It's really not that bad.

  2. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I'm scared of being made into a Tik Tok or gym fails compilation

  3. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Pantyboy

  4. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    What is that rectangular bulge on his stomach? Ab machine?

  5. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    this was me over 3 years ago but instead of facing my fears i set up a homegym instead

  6. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    What is the phobia? you're scared of gyms?

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I was scared of entering the gym yes

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        thats the dumbest phobia i've ever heard of
        how can you be scared of a building

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Not scared of the building per se, I'm afraid of the people in it, of what it embodies, of the atmosphere, the energy, and so on.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            You a girl OP?

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              Nope I'm a boy

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          The people inside that building will take your picture and post it on the internet and laugh.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            i dont give a shit

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              Some people are very scared of being confronted with their inadequacies and having other people point them out. A phobia isn't a logical thing but I do think most people with a phobia of the gym are just insecure and haven't had enough hardship in their life

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                i call those people gays

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Ok

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                In fact, the main problem is that if a stranger points out your mistakes, you can never be sure of their intentions. And even if people aren't pointing out your mistakes at the gym, maybe you're making them and people aren't saying anything, but they still think you're a failure. They may laugh inwardly without coming to you to correct you, because they think it's useless (I see a lot of people say they're "annoyed" by beginners who do shit in the gym and who, when you come to advise them, don't change a thing) or because they don't dare.

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              You clearly do tho

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                i dont, do you care if you appear on some tourist photos or video?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Stfu and don't respond to me ever again you stupid fricking homosexual

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                hahahha you care that a girl takes a video of youu
                b***h ass homie right there

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                She takes videos of me stroking myself.
                Full on caressing my throbbing hard-on.
                Massaging my wiener, Black person. Think about touching my wiener, Black person. Make it pulsate and shot fat ropes of cum on your b***h Black person lips, Black person.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                thats kinda gay Black person
                it is your right to be b***h made tho

  7. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I still sort of have that shit in me.
    I always ask my bud to come with me because I already got laughed at before I started working out regularly when I was a twig and it killed it off for me, instead decided to workout at home 90% of the time.
    This "people won't laugh but instead help" shit is fake, people are gay and will try to bring you down on every occasion.
    Prove me wrong please. Although I did learn that people only care for themselves, I can't really bring myself to go there on my own. I managed to once but I don't want to reach failure or weight that would make me feel something in case I would do it wrong, there are literally people who give a shit about that.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I agree with you, that's why I had this phobia. In fact, throughout my childhood and adolescence, at school and especially in sports class, I was mocked for my lack of ability (strength, dexterity, agility, speed, responsiveness, you name it as you want and they're all necessary skills to succeed in sports) and especially, because I'm quite effeminate (I'm gay, but we're talking about middle-school days here, so I couldn't have known back then, or at least it wasn't clear to me), people often made fun of me and we must admit we quickly make this link between femininity and fragility, and therefore being bad at sports.

      What formed the core of my phobia was this impression that if I showed up at the gym, people would "see" that I wasn't cut out for it, because of my frail body (so something you can spot at a glance), weak strength, poor proprioception (the ability to understand your body and execute movements with correct form). Basically, I was afraid of being stared at, I imagined I'd be stared at like I was in sports at school, where some pretty toxic bullies (not all of them, fortunately) really enjoyed spying on me with their eyes to spot the slightest flaw or mistake, and then exclaiming to the others "hey look, he did that, what a loser!".

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >Basically, I was afraid of being stared at, I imagined I'd be stared at like I was in sports at school, where some pretty toxic bullies (not all of them, fortunately) really enjoyed spying on me with their eyes to spot the slightest flaw or mistake, and then exclaiming to the others "hey look, he did that, what a loser!".

        Don't get me fricking started on that shit, back when I was in my elementary school years I had to witness every single day like this but not with exercise and instead with doing anything at all. Nobody helped me and I had to witness that mental abuse everyday because it's easier to throw an abused kid under the bus than actually deal with this as a teacher or staff. I have no clue what the frick was it about me that people did it to me, I guess people just enjoyed doing that shit to me because they had someone to laugh at.

        I also looked very feminine and I even grew out my hair for three years.
        Also I don't care about gays as long as they shut the frick up about it and don't indoctrinate people to think their way but why are you gay?
        Is it because your mother was very harsh or were girls just total buttholes during childhood years? Just to clarify I'm not attacking you. I'm asking because a lot of exgay people claimed that it was due to childhood trauma.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          "Why are you gay?" is a question that doesn't make much sense to me because I didn't choose it and even though it's something I experience, it's hard to identify the causes. I've looked into what scientific research has to say so far, and although there's no way to be certain (as causal studies on humans would require experimental manipulations that are rejected by ethics committees), there's a body of evidence suggesting that it has to do with intrauterine life, a kind of testosterone shot that normally masculinizes certain brain regions, which doesn't happen in gay boys. Why this absence of the testosterone shot? Good question, we don't know.

          In any case, I am gay but I'm not really an activist and I keep to myself. Besides, even if you saw me on the street, you wouldn't think I'm gay; I blend in quite well. However, it's clear that mentally I'm fragile and effeminate. I really feel like I have a feminine mentality in many aspects, particularly regarding the gym. It's very rare to hear a guy talk about "fear of others' stares at the gym," while it seems quite common among girls. At the gym, if a guy talks to me casually with terms like "bro" or "dude," I feel uncomfortable. I don't dare ask a guy who is using a machine I want how many sets he has left, and I just wait for him to finish. On the other hand, if a girl talks to me, I feel normal, I'm friendly with her and happy that she came to talk to me. This happens quite often, actually.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >In any case, I am gay but I'm not really an activist
            No need to clarify that, you didn't sound like one and you're the kind of person I'd respect.

            >I really feel like I have a feminine mentality in many aspects
            so did I but it was mainly because of trauma

            >At the gym, if a guy talks to me casually with terms like "bro" or "dude,"
            Guess you have bad association with dudes and believe they would hurt you for whatever reason. I believe you're just silently coming back to that time when guys made fun of you, but who am I to say that.

            Either way godspeed man, I am glad you could bring yourself to go out to the gym.

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              > No need to clarify that, you didn't sound like one and you're the kind of person I'd respect.

              I live in France, so I imagine the societal stakes on this subject are lower (and especially the divide, American society seems very polarized from what I know). But for example, right now we have the European elections coming up and the head of the list of the new party described as far-right recently spoke out against surrogacy, and I agree with her.

              > so did I but it was mainly because of trauma

              Apart from the trauma of bullying at school, I also experienced the trauma of a noxious family environment, with a lot of intrafamilial violence and an alcoholic (and aggressive when alcoholic) father who was not the classic role model for me. I know that this theme of the absent father often comes up among homosexuals, or at least among those I've known it was more or less always the case, to varying degrees.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                You know you sound like you're a decent guy and we have a lot in common and I wouldn't mind befriending you somewhere but this is IST and it's nearly impossible to do so. Also I'm not American and I know what's up in europe.

                Still as much as I feel repulsed by homosexuals I wish you well.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Why would you be friends with a homosexual unless you secretly dreamed about sucking dick?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                There are certainly advantages to having gay friends. Chief among them being the fact that a lot of them have attractive female friends who you can meet through the gay.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Hmmm true
                never thought of that

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                They'll probably just sexually harrass you constantly.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Gays who have "attractive women" around them are gays who are themselves attractive, or at least sociable, extroverted, and so on, which is not my case. It's precisely a mistake to believe that all gay men have only bombshell girlfriends. I have a lot of girl friends but they're average physically, even below beauty standards sometimes. They're not necessarily blue-haired lefties, even though I have a few in my circle. I'd say they're just plain girls, who you might find cute but not at all the sirens of the social networks.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                If there was a safe way for me to share one of my social networks with you (like Discord?) I'd be delighted.

                However, if there's one message you should take away from our interaction, it's not to be repulsed by gay people as a group. The group is too heterogeneous to lump everyone together. I too am annoyed by the attitude of some homosexuals, but I don't know if it's "because they're homosexuals", I imagine that this kind of attitude can also be found among heterosexuals. And even if certain behaviours are specific to SOME homosexuals, the word "SOME" here is crucial. All gays are not carbon copies of each other who all think alike, and we have to think of them as individuals, but above all as human beings. We are so much more than our sexuality, gay or straight!

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        so you are actually a gayget xdd
        I knew this was wierd

  8. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I still feel a degree of insecurity whenever my dyel ass is on a smith machine next to some beast squatting 3pl8s for a warmup, but Ive mostly learned to tune out my surroundings

  9. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    > Guess you have bad association with dudes and believe they would hurt you for whatever reason. I believe you're just silently coming back to that time when guys made fun of you, but who am I to say that.

    Yes, totally! I associate man with "potentially violent" and especially man who goes to the gym in fact, because sporty = hot-blooded = potentially freaks out about anything and everything. I know it's stupid, but it's the trauma talking.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Don't be complaining that people hurt gays, this is the kind of logic that makes straight men hate gays

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Except that unlike others, I'm aware of my bias and I don't say I hate boys. On the contrary, I like them, I like virile, masculine men. I don't consider masculinity to be inherently "toxic" and I like men who value it.

  10. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Since you keep reposting this, I am inclined to believe this is a fetish for you.

  11. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I was the same, what I did was I go to the gym very late at night, like 2am or something. Kept at it until I knew what I was doing, which was 2 months for me.Only then I started going during normal hours.

  12. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Post your body before and currently
    .

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      That was me before I started lifting (August 2022)

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      That is me now (May 2024), quite disappointing yes, but this is another story

  13. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Wfh, go at noon few people there and no waiting for machines

  14. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Just watch every OE Fitness video and don't do any of that shit. Then there will always be more embarrassing people than you at the gym.

  15. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Which gym do you go to? Let me know so I can snap a pic to post on DYEL hunter general.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Basic Fit in France

  16. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    What a gay ass thread, really regret reading your stupid whining
    Pls consider killing yourself

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