>got excommunicated by the gym bishop for looking sinfully at the gym harlot

>got excommunicated by the gym bishop for looking sinfully at the gym harlot
knightbros... I'm not gonna make it...

  1. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    You just mad me sad that my gym doesn't have a bishop

  2. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    >gym brigands stole my shaker bottle

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      flopka

  3. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    >tfw declared gym jester again
    i pretended to just laugh it off, but brethren, it's killing me inside

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      knoweth that feel brethren

  4. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    I freaking hate when lustful temptresses try to seduce me and strip me of my innocence

  5. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Time to start your own religion that lets you marry multiple women

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Yeah it's called mormanism.
      But if Christ makes you seethe, try islam.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      before you can embark on the gym jihad you need to wait for the gym persians and the gym romans to wear themselves through decades of bloody gym warfare

  6. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    >gym got ransacked by nomadic horse-riders once more
    They looted everything except the smith machine. Pray for my gains brothers, as i pray for yours.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      You just let a bunch of horse archers take your women and you did nothing? Jesus man your genetics are going to be slave apes that don't stand up for themselves.

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        Why would they take the maidens when they seek the gains? If his gym hadn't those creatures in the first place, they might've stood a chance.

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        It's not my fault all my lord lets me eat is gruel and those guys somehow filled the gym with meat, fruits, and fucking piles of garden gnomeelry they ransacked from God knows where

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      That’s what happen when you train alone instead of training with your equine companion

  7. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    the bishop catching you in the sinful act

  8. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Too bad there isnt a gym just for guys.
    >Too many harlots spending hours walking on treadmills, doing air squats, and doing the vaginal stretcher machine in the tightest of fibers distracting me.
    >The muslims were right about women all along brothers

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      guy heaven gym

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Open up a gym.
      Every new member gets his own brown gym strip and only play gregorian chant. Call it Monk Fitness or something.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      >The muslims were right
      This looks like a case for the gym inquisition!

  9. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    >local lord commissioned a new training yard at his castle
    >yeah why not check it out
    >mount my horse and began my journey
    >some stinking bandit tried to knock me off so i behead the fucker
    >arrive at the castle
    >dwarves and dainty men performing basic training wrong
    >is an afront my honor as knight
    >not even any wenches
    By the grace of god, what is this lord problem?
    Did he invite the weakest knights in the realm to part take in "training"
    Should i just butcher them alll, what should i do?

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      The lord is becoming weak sire…perhaps you should attack and take his throne…*giggles wickedly*

  10. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    >gym hoplites are practicing gladius thrusts in the pankration rack again

  11. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Job 31:1

    Stop listing after them, degenerate. It’s creepy.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Samuel 12: 8

      I gave you your master’s house and your master’s wives into your keeping, and gave you the house of Israel and Judah. And if that had been too little, I also would have given you much more!

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        Matthew 5:28

        But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.

  12. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    >Gym apothecary charges 3 silver for a scoop of whey

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Brother why are you paying the merchant apothecary your hard earned silver for whey? Forsooth it is your right to claim it from the peasantry

  13. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Serves you right for succumbing to your lust, sir knight.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      couldnt you wait for the image to load

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        The fuck are you talking about? The image is fine.

  14. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    >didn't bring enough gym doubloons to pay for the plate rental

    arrrrrg..

  15. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    >got promoted to royal knight after slaying "morbidly the beast"
    See you later wagecuck knightbros

  16. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Toughest battles for the best warriors

  17. 4 months ago
    nutefag

    repent sinner

  18. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    >accepting excommunication by the lower priest class
    >not knowing that such a thing is impossible for a true warrior standing in the light of the devine, as this is the natural order
    it's literally over for you, modern cuck

  19. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Noble brethren, I believe I may have contracted the dreaded leprosy of the loins from the gym trebuchet. I am sending my squire with a sternly worded parchment to the lord of the manor, regarding the presence of sinful men in the gym. However I am considering escalating this matter to the holy church. Do I have a case or is it best to keep this matter within the laws of the realm?
    Furthermore does anybody know a reputable medicae? My doctor has taken to wearing a crow's beak mask and insists I do the same within his barber shop.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Dont go to the doctor. Since you will lose the feel of pain on your skin it is time to forge your body. Become the mightiest warrior of the lands and shield the world from dark eldritch horrors.
      You will soon learn that adversity and existence are one and the same

  20. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    >gym alchemist still hasn't managed to transmute chalk into creatine
    >the hairgrowth potion he sold me just gave me diarrea

  21. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    >gym harlots try to corrupt me
    >use my status as a holy knight to declare them witches
    >gym comes together for a trial
    >a witch cannot 1/2/3/4 as everyone knows
    >they fail
    >burn them in the power cage
    >squat 3pl8 over their ashes

    Brothers, these whores and wenches are becoming bothersome. Why must they try and seduce men doing God's work?

  22. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Spirits, I be lifting big rock over head, then men with hair on face come and demand my oats. Hearts were taken for sacrifice that night, but now lungs and head burn like fire and breathing is hard
    Fuck foreigners, posing gays

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