How do I deal with "runner's shit"?

How do I deal with "runner's shit"?

Every morning I try to make myself shit to no avail, then later during my jog a massive turd immediately decides to migrate down my bowels and turtleneck. I used to shit in the bushes along my route, but someone left a "no dumping" sign next to my usual spot, lots of people walk their dogs there so I guess it wasn't very civic of me. Other routes I can take are even less convenient. I now walk back and clench my asscheeks, it ruins my times and targets and general schedule for the day.

  1. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >no dumping

  2. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Move to India. They don't have this problem there and it will be the global superpower in 2025z

  3. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Change your eating times.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I run midday on the weekends after the crap. I ran after work for a while, and that worked. Lately I've been running about a half hour, first thing in the morning. Come home to give birth, because I'm usually ready at that point. Then I run another half hour after work. I used to be able to take a dump immediately after waking up, and I miss that magical ability

      i wish i knew a fullproof fix for this. i just try to get my coffee in as early as possible and hope the urge hits while im stretching and getting warmed up otherwise i just end up dicking around waiting for it to come. if i was less of a coward i suppose i would just shit in my pants and run around with shit in my pants

      >have a steady schedule and diet
      >eat dinner early
      >wake up
      >drink 2 full glasses of lukewarm water
      >shit
      It's not hard.

      Does it really work like that, food goes in one end and the backpressure pushes poop out the other. I don't drink caffeine but I will try everything else mentioned, thanks.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Certainly dehydration can slow your defecation down

  4. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I run midday on the weekends after the crap. I ran after work for a while, and that worked. Lately I've been running about a half hour, first thing in the morning. Come home to give birth, because I'm usually ready at that point. Then I run another half hour after work. I used to be able to take a dump immediately after waking up, and I miss that magical ability

  5. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    so you're the one that's been shitting all over my fucking neighborhood

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >no dumping

      fertilizing the roses are you

      you can't escape the long arm of the law

  6. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Get ready for your run, do all the same routine stuff. Literally up to the point of walking out your door. Start thinking about how inconvenient it would be to have to take a massive shit while running. Once your stomach starts gurgling, TRICK YOURSELF and go back inside and pre-poop.

    Your body is gonna try and tell you that it's gotta take a shit on your run anyways, but YOU PRE-POOPED, so it's a goddamn liar.

    Do this every time for a while and you won't have to worry about it again.

  7. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    drink coffee to force the shit out

  8. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Ginger is a mild natural laxative, I was eating a couple ounces of pickled ginger a night but had to stop because my dumps were getting too loose. Maybe a little at night would accelerate things for you? Low calorie, delicious and healthy.

  9. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    i wish i knew a fullproof fix for this. i just try to get my coffee in as early as possible and hope the urge hits while im stretching and getting warmed up otherwise i just end up dicking around waiting for it to come. if i was less of a coward i suppose i would just shit in my pants and run around with shit in my pants

  10. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >have a steady schedule and diet
    >eat dinner early
    >wake up
    >drink 2 full glasses of lukewarm water
    >shit
    It's not hard.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Its almost like people are different

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        It is almost like people cannot keep a schedule.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Its almost like people are different

  11. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    just loop back around to your house so you can shit and then continue your run

  12. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Lower your fat intake, increase your carbs.
    Also stop doing cardio, it elevates cortisol. Lift heavy instead.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >literally don't run ever because running slightly impacts muscle growth and the ability to run 10 miles is not as important as lateral raising 35 pounds instead of 30
      Fat ass cope.

  13. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Either use laxative/microenema to shit in the morning, or delay your food intake till your shits start coming in the evening

  14. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Either run later in the day, after you've had your poo, or design your routes around them. Usually if I want to go for a long run and I haven't pooped yet, I'll make the first two miles an out and back, do my business in my own bathroom, then go back out again for the rest of the run.

  15. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    i drink coffee and have my breakfast before i run. after my coffee, im able to shit. ive made sure to maintain a good eating, sleep, and shitting schedule.

  16. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >drink 3 glasses of water
    >wait 30 minutes
    >shit
    >go running
    Wow its so hard!!!!

  17. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Red beets.
    It will fix constipation.
    For your issue just keep a scheduled shitting time, for me it's the morning.

  18. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    just go running in a diaper like a normal person

  19. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Is it normal to only shit once a week? I've been like that my whole life and making my diet healthier only made it worse.
    I remember there was a time where I could force my shit by drinking hot ramen brot.
    What can I do to fix this? Fiber supplements?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      just try linear progression if your a dyel shitter. start out by getting a base by shitting the most you can safely in a week. every week try to increase it by one. eventually youll get to a point where you can 3x10 shits every day and youll have to start looking into more difficult variations to progress to.

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