I have never, and will never in my life perform a front squat. If you want to, that's fine, live and let live and all that.
But if you want to tell me that there is anything NATURAL or FUNCTIONAL about this fucking position you can go fuck yourself.
I could sooner see myself shoving both my fists elbow deep in my own ass and doing cartwheels to get around than this shit.
Turning your wrists around 180 degrees and balancing hundreds of kilograms on your writhing fingertips and the most protruding part of your entire skeletal system. NATURAL. FUNCTIONAL.
When has ever, in human history, any living fucking soul tried to carry a lot of weight by balancing it on their fucking COLLARBONE.
Oh we have to get the shiny new anvil to the town blacksmith? Let me just turn my loopy sschwoopy ass hands around press my chin down real good, using only the most robust and practical surface for loading, a JUTTING SLIVER OF BONE UNDER MY NECK to accomplish this. Demented. Grotesque. A mockery of squatting and weight training in general.