I haven't had an 'home' instant messaging group for so long now.

I haven't had an 'home' instant messaging group for so long now. A server, a group chat, whatever that I can count on to share whatever in and belong to. Just a bunch of half dead servers with a million channels. Where/ how can I find a home?

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  1. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >find a home
    Jesus OP is just a chatgroup to speak shit online. These expectations of yours...must spoil everything you do.

  2. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Honestly just wow. The fact that you are writing this shows exactly why you aren't in any groups. I wouldnt invite you to one if i knew you were like this.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      You are fricking autistic. Nobody else has these sorts of set requirements that people have to obey you tardlet. How about you grow tf up and stop trying to make every groupchat line up exactly with your autistic checklist of parameters. Fricking idiot

      those aren't places. they're software running on computers that aren't yours.

      do irl stuff and use instagram

      >I'm awful with 1-1 conversations.
      Gotta get better at them then.
      And/or find someone with patience. You seem to be doing fine right now, though.

      >I prefer group settings where people can post stuff and chat and you can hop in and join conversation or share things - knowing that they'll care, and vice-versa.
      What you prefer isn't necessarily what's good for you. You'll have to be uncomfortable, and then hopefully that discomfort will ease as this way of life becomes your new normal.

      >I don't want to share the same thing with a bunch of different people in individual DMs for obvious reasons,
      You don't have to. You share different things with different people.
      I have my own personal discord server where I write myself ideas or things to do in the future, including stuff to send my friends when the time is right.

      >unless I have something very specific to share with someone, DMing directly feels weird and forced to me.
      It shouldn't feel that way. It's just like talking with someone irl. A normal person doesn't have to force himself to do that because there's a lot that they can gain from conversation.

      You fricking broccoli heads don't understand that in the 2000's the internet was full of "homes" and spaces.

      >JUST ADAPT BRO STOP COMPLAINING YOU'RE THE PROBLEM

      Holy frick frick off zoomers you are not helping OP and you don't understand what he is trying to get at.

  3. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Internet people come and go man, last 'home' I found that really felt like a home lasted about 4 months, then we all broke apart. Just put yourself out there a bunch, get hurt, see if it works out, but most people don't need an online home

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Internet people come and go man,
      Not necessarily true.
      It's been eight years since 2016 and I'm still talking to the same chuds from IST.

  4. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Where/ how can I find a home?
    Discord servers aren't really made to last.
    You should have made a few genuine friends there years ago and consistently talked to them in a group DM or 1 on 1.

    I know this because I've had some such friends of my own since 2016. I've even visited some of them.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I'm awful with 1-1 conversations. I prefer group settings where people can post stuff and chat and you can hop in and join conversation or share things - knowing that they'll care, and vice-versa. I don't want to share the same thing with a bunch of different people in individual DMs for obvious reasons, and unless I have something very specific to share with someone, DMing directly feels weird and forced to me.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        You are fricking autistic. Nobody else has these sorts of set requirements that people have to obey you tardlet. How about you grow tf up and stop trying to make every groupchat line up exactly with your autistic checklist of parameters. Fricking idiot

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >I'm awful with 1-1 conversations.
        Gotta get better at them then.
        And/or find someone with patience. You seem to be doing fine right now, though.

        >I prefer group settings where people can post stuff and chat and you can hop in and join conversation or share things - knowing that they'll care, and vice-versa.
        What you prefer isn't necessarily what's good for you. You'll have to be uncomfortable, and then hopefully that discomfort will ease as this way of life becomes your new normal.

        >I don't want to share the same thing with a bunch of different people in individual DMs for obvious reasons,
        You don't have to. You share different things with different people.
        I have my own personal discord server where I write myself ideas or things to do in the future, including stuff to send my friends when the time is right.

        >unless I have something very specific to share with someone, DMing directly feels weird and forced to me.
        It shouldn't feel that way. It's just like talking with someone irl. A normal person doesn't have to force himself to do that because there's a lot that they can gain from conversation.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        This. I was in a discord with friends I made online for over half a decade before I left due to people disappearing one by one and everyone getting lives. I hate DMing people, I much prefer a communal space that doesn't place as much pressure on single interactions.

  5. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I'd invite you to mine anon. what's your discord

  6. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    go back to

    [...]

    normiegay. i swear to god ISTs just becoming a discord hun

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      /soc/ is full with coomers, zoomers, trannies, child molesters and normies

  7. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    those aren't places. they're software running on computers that aren't yours.

    do irl stuff and use instagram

  8. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    What's your discord, you can join mine 🙂 We are all pretty cool with different types of people from all walks of life

  9. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >join random discord
    >post random images whenever you get bored in general chat
    force them to be victim to whatever you post

  10. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >i need a home guys!!1!
    no, you dont.

  11. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I made my own server and I just talk to myself on it

  12. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    my home server has been
    going for 5 years! It slowed down tho

  13. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    not sure if youd like this place
    QpRFdRNBEp
    ^invite

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      This server is run by a woman that got caught dating a 12 year old and bans everyone for exposing her

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        That's her profile btw

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      the invite link is dead ^_^;

  14. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Where/ how can I find a home?
    Make your own. That's the first thing I did the moment I first made a discord account at 2016. I still run said server and it's still active even if it's private now and only a few members are still active. It's much more active even comparing to big public servers that are heavily advertised or belong to popular artists, YouTubers, influencers etc.

  15. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Finding home on the Internet is making your own island whether it has people or not. It sucks to invest in communities around the Internet because they're either too transient or people take them way too seriously.

  16. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    here's a sfw server
    /MVdJjWtW

    no pol tards and racism transphobia etc

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >"NO RACISM AND TRANSPHOBIA!"
      Then why you advertise it here from all places?

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        where else am I supposed to advertise it homie

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      very nice server!

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Haha!! hope it's full of BADDIES and DANK MEMES!!! can't wait to hop in!!!

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          my fellow kekistani, I can assure you our server is full of femcel egirls and the dankest edgy offensive memes that exist... shadilay and praise kek.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          my fellow kekistani, I can assure you our server is full of femcel egirls and the dankest edgy offensive memes that exist... shadilay and praise kek.

          Ironic or not this ruined my mood

  17. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >i join
    >THIS IS DYNAMICS ARE YOU GONNA STAY
    >I approach
    >When do you fall apart?

  18. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    you need to create your own community, focusing on interests that are relevant to you, or relevant to the kind of people you wish to connect with.

    It helps to have a subject to talk about, people gather around a community hub for a video game, a public figure, a sporting team or sport in general.

    Get creative and create.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >people gather around a community hub for a video game, a public figure, a sporting team or sport in general.
      and only a few of them talk since most of them are lurkers

  19. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    me and my brother (my brother and I) made our own discord so we could post whatever we wanted without anyone saying it was against their rules
    we basically have the best discord ever
    its too bad we have such high standards none of you are allowed on there, you wouldnt last a day anyway

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >its too bad we have such high standards none of you are allowed on there, you wouldnt last a day anyway
      I bet you don't even allow anime e-girls

  20. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    just quit discord and the internet in general, you'll be happier

  21. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    How do people manage to be part of "groups" so easily
    I can join a discord group if I am invited by a friend
    And just like at a IRL party it only "works" if I spend the entire time there following my friend around and doing what they do

    I have tried to just "join a community" before and it goes the same way everytime

    >Join group / server
    >Filled with people who already know each other (even if it's a "new" group it's filled with people who know eachother from other groups
    >I am the odd one out
    >They are all making in jokes that I don't get
    >I am the odd one out
    >They are talking constantly and having closed conversations in general chat that I can't just join and start replying to
    >I am the odd one out
    >Join VC
    >Everyone already talking
    >They all already know eachother
    >No break to introduce myself
    >At best someone calls me out to try and make fun of the random newguy to get closer with the in-group
    >Before I can respond someone interrupts to say someone and the conversation moves on
    >Try to interact and talk in text channels
    >Get totally ignored at best
    >At worst someone decides to start picking on you because they have all the allies and you have none

    I have tried and tried and tried again
    I don't see what I can change about my approach to have any of that work out

    The answer seems to be "just be inherently likeable and have people automatically elevate you to a position of respect the second you meet them"

    You can't just "join a group"
    All groups are already established and will reject you as a outgrouper to strengthen the ingroups bond

    You can *form a group* but that only happens by pure luck and random chance of you being grouped up with other losers and none of you are able to leave
    >AKA it's only possible in school
    And even in school by 5th or 6th grade the "losers" and "nerds" have there own groups setup and will reject you if you try to join
    Forget about highschool if your a loner
    Forget about the rest of your life

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      VCs were a rare and special occasion for the servers I've been in. I've only had success in retention being in groups I had a part in forming, so I don't really know how to "join in" to an existing world. I haven't made an irl friend since like 2014

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >And even in school by 5th or 6th grade the "losers" and "nerds" have there own groups setup and will reject you if you try to join
      wow this is literally me when I was too autistic for even the greasy kids that played MTG at lunch

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I have the same gruop of friends from highschool that have been going strong for over ten years. It will break up one day so I'm just going to enjoy it while it lasts as I hate the act of having to break into a clique.

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