People who were raised by their single mothers, do you think it damaged your development as a male adult?

People who were raised by their single mothers, do you think it damaged your development as a male adult?

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  1. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I was basically raised by my mother and grandmother because my father was at work all the time.
    We had everything we could ever need but he just never taught me and my brother to "be men" or raise us in anyway so to speak. He just sort of left that to my mom and grandparents (who spoiled me of course), Maybe he came from a time where kids were just expected to pick that stuff up on their own.
    Anyway long story short my brother and I are both losers.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      There's a joke I've heard my psychology friend say
      Nice daddy issues, did your mom give them to you?
      She says how can you have daddy issues if your dad wasn't there to give them to you, instead what happened was your mother imprinted her issues of the dad on to you. What ends up happening is these women are so hung up on the absent father they start raising their son's to fill in the gap of the father. Sounds a little Freudian but it's more like she raises her some to be emotional, she raises him to be protective of women, she raises him to be how she wanted her man to be before he left

      lmao it's so mind-boggling that you incels actually still listen to your mothers. Did you never go through puberty?
      You're grown men now, you can disregard what your mothers told you.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        What did my mother tell me that makes me an incel? (I'm not btw).
        Why do think I still "listen to her" and do what she says now?
        You're literally just making up shit and typing it out as you go

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      There's a joke I've heard my psychology friend say
      Nice daddy issues, did your mom give them to you?
      She says how can you have daddy issues if your dad wasn't there to give them to you, instead what happened was your mother imprinted her issues of the dad on to you. What ends up happening is these women are so hung up on the absent father they start raising their son's to fill in the gap of the father. Sounds a little Freudian but it's more like she raises her some to be emotional, she raises him to be protective of women, she raises him to be how she wanted her man to be before he left

      >Be kid
      >single mom
      >Hey little timmy this is Steve who is blowing my back out tonight
      >3 months later
      >Hey timmy meet Chad who is busting nutz on my face tonight
      >3 day later
      >Hey Timmy i know you liked Chad, but he was an butthole. Meet Alex. Dont knock on my door tonight because mommy is really sleepy and needs to stay in bed alllllll night
      >3 days later
      >Alex was an butthole. Meet Bob

      I am sure this has no impact on a young male whatsoever

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Haha. This fricked me up as a man forever. I feel disgust to my mother. I think this shit can't be fixed
        This is beyond over.

  2. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    There's a joke I've heard my psychology friend say
    Nice daddy issues, did your mom give them to you?
    She says how can you have daddy issues if your dad wasn't there to give them to you, instead what happened was your mother imprinted her issues of the dad on to you. What ends up happening is these women are so hung up on the absent father they start raising their son's to fill in the gap of the father. Sounds a little Freudian but it's more like she raises her some to be emotional, she raises him to be protective of women, she raises him to be how she wanted her man to be before he left

  3. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Yes, quite considerably, but that basically only delayed my maturation process by 15 years. I also had an anti-authoritarian upbringing and every problem I had I had to solve myself, without any hope of support, even when I was in the right. This got me into a lot of trouble at school, where I was treated unfairly by teachers but didn't have the confidence to stand up for myself. This eventually led to me being expelled from school. Her idea was that this would make me more independent and confident, but instead I just avoided any situation where I had to take responsibility in any way, and very normal parts of growing up now scare the hell out of me because I have next to no idea about it. During my studies I also had big problems and was very unhappy with my situation, but I was financially dependent and stuck with it until I was also exmatriculated (again wrongly). I don't know if she had good intentions or was just lazy and never cared about me. Not once was I asked how I feel about anything or offered help.

  4. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    yes. Infact I just cried again, thinking about my lost childhood and everything. Parents divorced when I was 5, mother became alcoholic. Cps should have taken me away, but she was good at hiding everything and I didn't know better as child. Now I'm a single father with full costudy of a young boy myself, wife is a psychotic b***h. Cps is involved and I'm going the correct path this time, taking the responsibility which my own father never took.

    Always wondered what was wrong with me, not realizing it wasn't normal. Comparing myself with kids my age at that time. Such is life for some

  5. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Yes, but not because she was female.
    I was never pushed to succeed at anything and poorly socialised as a young child.
    My academic scores went from top 1% for my age, with teachers giving me accelerated learning programs as a child to falling back to average with no work ethic by the time I finished school.
    I was basically autistic early on and probably would have been diagnosed. Managed to luck out and make some friends by being a moronic subject of light bullying until I learned to act normal and evaded diagnosis by being born before that was popular here.
    Accepted that everything is within my control now I'm an adult, but correcting these character flaws wouldn't have been necessary if I had a different parent.
    Sort of blame my absent father too, he was teaching cripples to ski while I didn't know how to ride a bike or swim or ski because mum thought letting a kid play video games all day is good enough.

  6. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    My dad didn’t step into my life until my mid-teens and my moms boyfriend used to threaten us with a shotgun and beat me up until he eventually overdosed so the whole thing has made me autistic and uncomfortable around other men, which has been a huge obstacle in my life

  7. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Funny thing is, when I was a kid other kids that were orphaned or lived with their grandparents used to bond with me over the fact that we all didn't have parents even though I did live with my mother, she just never did anything for me other than barely keeping me alive. I was significantly underweight until I earned money to buy food, because she worked full-time, even when I was a child, and she ate lunch and dinner at work. I was home alone all day after school, often times there wasn't even bread in the house, sometimes I mixed flour with water to eat something. One time when I complained about being hungry she offered me bread with mold on it and when I rejected it she said if you were hungry you would eat it. I think I was 22 or so when she gave me the first hug I can recall, I developed a an issue with intimacy and regular body contact and I'm emotionally stunted and distant, had a few disfunctional relationships, which were better than nothing but only made me realize that I am not compatible to live with any other person.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >I am not compatible to live with any other person.
      That's rough man

  8. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    i don't consider myself raised by my mother, it led to me being raised by IST, needless to say i'm a 26 y/o incel but i'm unbeatable in any debate about extremely fringe topics

  9. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I have a friend who was essentially solely raised by women his entire life.
    Parents split up couple years after he started school, moved to another country shortly after. Lived with his mother, sister aswell as often visted by their aunt (mothers sister) who also moved.
    He's not necessarily homosexual or camp but certain behaviours he has is definitely due to growing up in an entirely female household.
    Couple of things include being. Entitled that others go out of their way to do things for him and act like what they're asking is really not much effort while also simulatiously being as little as help as possible when asked to do something.
    Will take any kind of criticism as a personal, often blaming any of his negative characteristics/actions on his mental health issues to deflect. Never any admission of guilt, will either deflect infinitely or just accuse you of being mean and hurtful or again blame their mental illness. Those sorta things. Ultimately is just a case of I cannot give him any responsibility because he'd do a poor rush job (usually not even finishing it) to escape the responsibility of having to do anything and then when I question him why he's done just a shit job he'd just deflect and play victim.
    I've actually just started treating him mentally as I would a woman where you enjoy their company, but I couldn't trust him to do anything of substance

  10. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Checked

    Gee I dunno OP, if only there was an entire demographic known for their scumbag behavior and have single motherhood rates in the high 70th percentile, that you could look to as an example. Can you think of one?

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Except they still have that disparity when they have fathers, just to a lower degree.

  11. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    sad thread

  12. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Absolutely and she also has autism.

  13. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I was raised by very controlling mother and passive conflict avoiding father.

    Yes it damaged me.

    When I decided to choose different uni degree tyan my mommy wanted me to choose she was so angry that tried to fight with me but after few seconda she realized thst not a good idea kek.

  14. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Being raised by a single parent does affect you but if ur a grown ass adult blaming your problems on your childhood instead of just solving them thats fricking lame

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      so why even spend time and effort trying to raise children right if they can just "solve their problems" when they get older?

  15. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Probably, yes, do I know what exactly? No.
    I can talk to women, I am friends with men, I am not gay. But I'm sure something's more messed up than it should be.

  16. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Probably, yes. Do I know what exactly? No.
    I can talk to women, I am friends with men, I am not gay. But I'm sure something's more messed up than it should be. That said, my mom is not a very girly(?) woman, she was what you'd call a tomboy when she was younger, and in the 25 years of my life I think I've seen her cry, like, twice.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >be golden retriever
      >can't retrieve shit
      Such is life

  17. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    80 percent of people who go to Ivy Leavue schools come from families where their parents married once and never divorced. I’ve never met a successful man who was raised by a single mother or by an overbearing mother.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I feel like these stats are a chicken and the egg scenario. Up until very recently the vast majority of children born to single mothers were black or white trash. Even for white trash they still usually got married through at least the 90s. It’s no surprise that all stats and incomes are worse for the children of single mothers since they usually have bad genes and circumstances regardless of how well they are parented.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        I’m sure it is to an extent, the same way that it is when people make statements like “people who are married tend to make more money than unmarried people.” The potential answer here is that people who are successful probably make more attractive marriage partners. As with the Ivy League example, though, the effect is still notable even though we could debate its causes. Obviously children benefit from having two parents rather than one. I think anyone who argues against this is likely doing so for personal reasons.

  18. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Yes.

  19. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    It’s weird how gear can unironically move you to the left on this chart even after puberty

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      What's gear?

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        moron

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          I'm esl

      • 3 weeks ago
        AnavarGuy

        Cocaine is gear anon

        https://i.imgur.com/DJwp0k1.jpg

        People who were raised by their single mothers, do you think it damaged your development as a male adult?

        >Did it ruin my development
        Yeah, massively.
        >Grew up poor and had to hide the fact I didn't get presents from friends at school
        >Never able to go on field trips anywhere or participate in extracurriculars
        >Always overperformed in school but didnt have the confidence to use that
        >Spent every evening in the library so I didnt have to go home where I had nothing to do
        >Always overweight because my mother only bought frozen food or biscuits, peanut butter sandwiches and full fat milk
        >Always the cheapest clothes because she got into stupid debt with "Buy now, pay later" garbage and credit cards
        >Eventually move away from home to York and then to Japan, she finally gets a job rather than relying on the government
        >Get first girlfriend at 21 because I was shy and had imposter syndrome
        >Touching me make me squirm, even if it was just my lower back
        I could honestly write all my issues but even now she isnt improving her own health, shes became christian and believes that when she dies its because its her time to go. So she just eats cheese sandwiches, potato chips, chocolate and cake everyday.
        Im better now and I attribute 90% of that change to lifting weights and forcing mself into situations where I wasnt comfortable anymore, simple stuff like eating veg was difficult until I was 25. (Mother had never bought any for me so I didnt grow up eating it)
        Either way Im not a pussy anymore, if someone starts shit I get a thrill out of fighting back. Being violent is addictive and its even better when Im taking stuff.
        Anyone who is a bit soft needs to take roids tbh, roid rage is just how you should react to being stepped on.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >I could honestly write all my issues but even now she isnt improving her own health, shes became christian and believes that when she dies its because its her time to go. So she just eats cheese sandwiches, potato chips, chocolate and cake everyday.
          Sounds like my mom

          • 3 weeks ago
            AnavarGuy

            Does she also complain when you drink alcohol or something and use "My body is a temple" as gospel despite not looking after her health at all?

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              >Does she also complain when you drink alcohol or something and use "My body is a temple" as gospel despite not looking after her health at all?
              No, but she likes to give me random health advice despite the fact that she's almost 400 pounds and can barely walk.

              • 3 weeks ago
                AnavarGuy

                Oh yeah I know the type. My mum calls all my food greasy and fatty and tells me its unhealthy.
                She also refuses to touch raw chicken at the ripe old age of 55. How can you be that childish? Its unherad of right?

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >She also refuses to touch raw chicken at the ripe old age of 55. How can you be that childish?
                Same but mine's going on 63. I don't expect her to live longer than the next two years. Every month there's some new issue she has with her body, her skin, whatever. A few weeks ago she went to the ER because her feet were swollen.

                It's tiresome and I try desperately not to see her in other women (see my other post

                https://i.imgur.com/tbvMWd0.jpg

                Yes.
                My dad died young because his family depended on him for everything. My mom's a fat, lazy, narcissistic POS and I'm waiting for her to die.

                I think my aversion to and disgust with fat women in particular is what gave me a female muscle fetish. The more they lift and the more roids they shoot up with, the further they get from that soft, weak, codependent thing (not even really human at this point) I see my mother as.

                )

  20. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Big time.

  21. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Yes. I was for sure stunted as a man until early 20s when I had the opportunity to learn from other men and the internet.

  22. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Yes.
    My dad died young because his family depended on him for everything. My mom's a fat, lazy, narcissistic POS and I'm waiting for her to die.

    I think my aversion to and disgust with fat women in particular is what gave me a female muscle fetish. The more they lift and the more roids they shoot up with, the further they get from that soft, weak, codependent thing (not even really human at this point) I see my mother as.

  23. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Focusing too much on your upbringing as an adult is itself Judaic/feminine thinking.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      how much is too much?
      be specific since you're an expert on the matter

  24. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Short answer, yes. Got involved with domineering and emotionally unstable women for years—guess where I learned to tailor my behavior to a woman with those traits! I couldn’t ask, “Are you mad at me? What’s wrong?” often enough. Fricking travesty. Married 8 years now tho to a woman with whom these dynamics do not occur and I’m a great father to my little girl, too.

    SEE A PSYCHOANALYST ASAP ALL MY FELLOW SINGLE-MOTHER RAISED GUYS

  25. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Yes. After my Dad died when I was 11, I was raised by my Mom and her Mom. One was a second wave feminist, the other was her daughter. My mom was very friendly and blindly trusting of our local school system, which was also run by butter authoritarian feminists.
    I was raised to be a “nice guy”, taught that I was the definition of evil, and my mother would get pissed off at me for being depressed even though she knew very well that she was at fault.
    I have little to no trust or respect with authority figures, which has fricked with my work ethic ever since. I’m starting to get over it, but I’m still a virgin cuck with no social life at 27 years old.
    I refuse to believe that it’s over, but my start was fricked in the butthole with a mile long pole with spikes that shoot acid and fire.
    Frick feminism, and frick foids!

  26. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    No, I think autism had a foot in the door before my mom had a chance to ruin me. Luckily I grew up on a farm and it made me harder than most neurotypical men with good male behavior modeling. Still a soft moron who just wants to spend time with geese but it's not a kind of softness normies recognize as weakness.

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