I have no problem getting sexual partners but I can never maintain an erection. I tried working out, drinking, Xanax, gas station boner pills, quitting smoking and various supplements but nothing worked. I feel like my anxiety is turning me asexual. Has anyone here ever overcome something like this?
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Age, height and weight?
You can achieve an erection but fail to maintain it?
Do you watch pornography and/jerk off?
Are you depressed or under great stress?
I've had this problem. I found my causes to be:
1. Alcoholism
2. Depression
3. Fricking women I'm unattracted to
Jesus are you me? Glad there is some hope. Trying to frick disgusting chicks is no joke. Also booze. Man it sucks I had this petite Indian milf all worked up and I couldn't even come close to getting it up even though I thought she was attractive because I was just on a 3 day bender. Fug
get your T levels checked
do cardio, not just weight lifting
and what said
I had trouble with erections and it was #3 in the end. I guess I can't into escorts.
I was worried about it but then I finally got a GF and yeah. No problems with her.
Dude, number 3 wrecked my brain for a long time. I was obsessed with just getting any pussy that I could, even if the quality of the women was shit. When I finally met my girlfriend it was like I had taken Viagra and all the problems disappeared.
Stop jerking off.
>Stop jerking off.
>Stop using condoms
>Stop watching porn
^these are all excellent pieces of advice tbh.
Assuming you can get an erection in the first place, something is going on hormonally
Stop using condoms
>Stop using condoms
this
also this
is the main reason people can't get hard.
we think that sex is some physical performance, but i realized over the years that it's literally some spiritual shit. i'm going to sound like some new age gay, but your dick is incredibly attuned to these energies. your dick will never lie to you.
the problem is that you're forcing your dick to perform when it doesn't see any meaning in it. ie it doesn't think that the girl you're fricking is worth it. it's truly bizzare.
>dick makes you go through all the bullshit of getting a woman to frick
>decides last second it has no interest
>refuses to elaborate
What a c**t.
last second it has no interest
many factors are involved. i literally go soft if the woman smells "not right" (most women do). that could be happening to you as well.
we men take our dicks for granted. but our semen is literally the source of all life. every person you see was some man's sperm. think about it for a sec.
sex can never be a physical act because it's literally a vessel for the creation of a human being - literal human souls are inside your balls. women do not have that power - which is why for them, it's merely a physical act.
if you see sex as merely a physical act, you'll constantly fail. if you realize that the partner you are with is someone worthy of receiving a soul, then your dick will never go soft.
but the problem is that we are taught that getting laid is the most important thing in the world. if we think like that, we will frick bawds who are not our spiritual match. this leads to soulless npcs that are litertally everywhere.
Checked. I've tried to make peace with this fact. I have no desire for a serious relationship but still want to frick. All I ask is that she is someone I can get along with and is genuinely attractive to me. I hate how so many women like to brag about their frickin daddy issues or mental problems like I'm supposed to find that shit attractive. Frick, I love fricking older women now because 9/10 they know exactly what they want, are chill, and can hold decent conversations.
>I hate how so many women like to brag about their frickin daddy issues or mental problems like I'm supposed to find that shit attractive.
think about it this way:
you know how women dress like bawds? who are they attracting when they do this? basically my point is - spiritually, you manifest what you truly desire (and i'm not trying to be mean here).
there are genuinely attractive women out there who hold decent conversations, who are smart and who are literally your match. Plato discussed this in the Symposium - that all men were once two headed, four-legged, four armed entities that were seperated by the Gods - thus there is a direct match for everyone out there.
your match won't be on tinder or in bars though. it's not going to be a milf that you have a good time with. you won't find them - they'll find you once you desire to be found. it's literally going to happen when you least expect it.
trying to get with someone just because you want to frick using your divine soul-creating masculine energy to literally satisfy some animal instinct. trying to find chicks to frick is literally tempting fate - in a sense that God did not intend your semen to be used this way.
it's more difficult than you think, and i totally understand you, but trust me, you'll come to this realization just like me. if you realize that what you have in your balls is the most divine treasure, you'll not want to spread it willy nilly.
just my two cents.
>in a sense that God did not intend your semen to be used this way.
I'm not going to disagree with you and I will completely acknowledge my upcoming taker is probably Black person-tier, however, the idea of finding the 1 is such a foreign concept to me in our current world. But the idea of forming a harem of women who I enjoy being with is even better. If I genuinely like and am attracted to a girl (could be some tomboy, could be a fatty), I can have a good conversation and frick them. And having them know that you can bounce at any second leaves them in a state of mind where if they like you, they will do more ot please you. Being "official" is a way of saying that you WILL put up with shit because "muh relationship". Obviously in a good relationship it isn't as bad, but as I have said, in today's world this seems nearly impossible.
I'm
and while my situation could be seen as fricked up, al I know is that this woman wants my dick, is attractive to me, and can hold conversation. I honestly don't care for much else.
i'm not saying you need to be in a relationship. i'm saying that if you're looking for something more than sex - and trust me, all b***hes become a chore after a while - then the way is through some sort of divine connection, whatever that means.
i just wanted to help anons out who are concerned about losing their erections. my point is that they shouldn't be worried - it's not their fault. it's literally their dicks saying that the bawd they are banging is not someone they want to give a soul to. the dick - being an organ of divine soul-bringing into this world - knows more than we do with our stupid brains.
I love banging girls with daddy issues, send them my way
Stop watching porn
never
you know chad watches BLACKED and pornhub every day and he still can get it up for stacy? if you really think taking all the joy out of life will fix your sex life you might as well have a nice day.
Chad here. I only watch HWD porn. BLACKED is gross asf.
Yeah, well OP isn't Chad, is he? He's some average frick trying to get his dick to work better.
Have you tried finding a sexual partner that you actual connect with or are you just trying to bang bawds at the bar?
If you're fricking for the sake of fricking and you don't really have any interest in the chick you're doing it with your dick won't lie to you.
Hm i think this is me. Cannot maintain hard erection, i think im not attracted sexually to the hooker im with. Any tips?
Embrace the situation. This Friday I'm going out to some mommy body 40 something MILF's place out in the middle of the country. She is a solid 6 that I'd never show off, but GODDAMN she has curves in all the right places. Her face looks old and wrinkled and I can either choose to say, "Wull... she's not like my 2D mommies or the people I watch on PornHub" or I can acknowledge what she is and frick her with my full attention and might. If you are watching porn then there's a good chance that you are trying to recreate something you saw. You're not attracted tot he person, but the idea. If she looked like the girl you coomed to (assuming said girl is someone you don't have immediate regret for) you'd get hard.
Basically:
>don't look at porn
>be fully honest if you are attracted to what you're fricking
>nothing wrong with kinks and fetishes, just make sure you want to frick the person as well and not act out some fantasy
1 week of NoPorn and Zinc and you will want to frick anything that moves. And I do mean NOPORN. Don't go looking shit up on /gif/ to satisfy some craving.
stop roiding
Like, you are in the middle of having sex and your dick goes soft? Does that actually happen to people without cumming? I have had whiskey dick before and couldn't get it up, but that was years ago in uni.
Some of us are so attractive we can’t get it up for anyone because you’re all so ugly. It’s tough.
>you are in the middle of having sex and your dick goes soft?
I've had sex two times and exactly this happened both times.
She was really hot too.
I think for me it was a combination of
>alcohol
>tiredness
>anxiety
>sex is way more cardio than I though
>years of watching porn and jerking off
>a bit thin dick so it didn't feel that much
>shame from getting too self conscious about my dick size
>awkwardness of doing it with a stranger
Quit porn after that and haven't jerk offd with my hand since then.
If you can be open with the girl that you aren’t that experienced and she says it’s okay, it relieves a lot of pressure.
No porn + no alcohol + not being psychologically under pressure = great erections
Did it help?
That happens to me quite often but after like 30 mins of sex. It gets really soft and i stop feeling anything. Hard to finish too so we just take a break and go at it after a bit. But i rather not lose erection.
Thankfully I’m a narcissist and I get off on myself being desireabe, so I’ve never had this problem
Have you tried...
being in love?
you just might have issues where sex makes you feel vulnerable so you can't get it up. all these people in this thread only addressing the symptoms not the illness - try going to therapy for it. very common issue for men
Step 1: Become as Healthy as possible. You want to lose weight through cardio, lower body exercises (especially ones that affect pelvic muscles), and eating healthily. Sleep enough hours daily while taking melatonin supplements, because melatonin encourages Human Growth Hormone productions. Stay away from drugs, ESPECIALLY STIMULANTS LIKE CAFFEINE.
Step 2: Learn to jelq once a day, do penis stretches twice a day, and use a penis pump three times a day. While doing any of these, apply the following mix to promote the maximum amount of circulation, health, and growth: coconut oil, aloe vera gel, l-arginine powder, and rosemary, lavender, sandalwood, cardamom, and almond essential oils.
Step 3: when not doing those exercises, apply a DHT cream with either HGH pills or powders. Cycle this on 4 weeks and off 2 weeks with off weeks being on DHT blockers to resensitize your body’s receptors. DHT allows the growth needed.
Step 4: Don’t jack off more than once or twice a week. Sex is okay.
Step 5: Use the following supplements daily: d-aspartic acid, zinc, magnesium, horny goat weed, creatine, protein, butea superba root, sorghum bran, boron, cayenne pepper, chaste berry, tribulus terrestris, grape seed extract, and bovine orchics. Take Vitamin D-3 supplements.
Step 6: Do visualization exercises, keeping a positive mindset. Also think about using affirmations.
The combination of promoting healthy circulation, hormones that help its health, and tissue health should give an inch or two over a year’s effort.
Steps 1, 2, 3, and 4 are the most important, especially the DHT cream. 5 is very helpful if you’ve got money. Step 6 is good when you’re meditating.
erections are pure cardio which IST hates
true!
I have the opposite problem as OP. Bust ropes after 30 seconds pass and no tragic horrible visual I conjure up to distract me seems to work
Can you maintain an erection during bj's or handjobs?
>Can you maintain an erection during bj's or handjobs?
yes
You sound just like me then. I wish I knew what is wrong with us. The times I did have normal sex though is when I stick it in as soon as I get my first erection. If the foreplay takes a little too long I lose it and it become a problem.
>I wish I knew what is wrong with us.
I have a couple of hypotheses:
1) death grip. basically when we fap we hold it too tight. vageen can't match that.
>solution: no more fapping and no more porn
2) pussies are inherently ugly and disgusting. they can also stink, which destroys our imaginary view of pussies. mouths and hands are cleaner and sexier and it is a bit more taboo
>solution: don't frick random b***hes, don't fap, find a girl whose vageen you'll actually like, whose smells you will actually enjoy, and who you literally want to breed.
in both cases, the answer is to stop fapping and watching porn
> pussies are inherently ugly and disgusting. they can also stink, which destroys our imaginary view of pussies. mouths and hands are cleaner and sexier and it is a bit more taboo
You actually might be gay dude. When I see or smell a vegana I go animal mode and get completely overcome with horniness. It would be impossible to lose the erection before cumming. Your disgust with veganas probably means you’re gay or mentally I’ll or both
not all pussies smell the same. you'd realize this if you weren't a virgin
>you’re a le heccin virgin incelarino!
Nice reddit tier argument homosexual, I dated and fricked the same girl for 4 years
>I dated and fricked the same girl for 4 years
my condolences.
Sorry some of us enjoy pussy and don’t have erectile dysfunction at the ripe age of 21 kek. The literal one thing your body is biologically designed to do and you can’t even get it up, what a complete failure
>enjoy pussy
Virgin
Don't get me wrong the thrill of fresh pussy is great, but nothing beats the pussy of the girl you love. There are always moments of the grass seeming greener but it's not the case. I only frick girls I don't love because it helps take the edge off and hold me over until I get another girlfriend. :'(
I considered many different explanations and honestly I think at the end they all play a factor to some degree, but cookie cutter solutions never worked, because there were moments where I did have proper sex with a proper erection that didn't go away. just good ol' sex. I wish I could put a finger on what made those moments, well, work.
Holy shit this is so me. Im very much like you. If the foreplay become too long i become bored and my dick will become not very hard. I must stick it as quickly as possible when its hard and feeling the stimulation from contracting vegana to maintain my hardness. Thats why i mostly only doing 1 or 2 position when doing it and mainly in misionaries position if i want to shoot my sperm because im afraid my peepe becoming soft without stimulation.
Whats wrong with us is this a psychology shit or some spiritual mind? Or this is because of my age? I will be 40 this year.
Idk bro I'm 32 and it really fricking sucks. Like come on I should be hard as fricking diamonds sucking on her breasts and playing with her pussy and yet my dick goes soft so quick, it's like it has a mind of it's own, because in my head I'm enjoying the moment, like I'm horny, but my dick just ain't feeling it.
Anxiety
Yeah i know that feel bro cause thats exactly the same thing happen to me. Frick this shit. I hope this is just temporary thing and in the future my dick will improve. Need to train our mind, body, and dick i think. Wgmi bro
Performance anxiety
How the frick do I last longer?
I can barely last a minute jerking off to the imagination, let alone fricking my gf.
I have to take several breaks just to hit the 3 minute mark, and it just takes me out of the experience.
I have no trouble getting hard again, and I can keep hard through a few orgasms, but I'll cum just as fast every time.
>I can barely last a minute jerking off to the imagination, let alone fricking my gf.
you are worried about performance, which makes you think about other things (your performance), which leads to quick ejaculation.
if you didn't give a frick about it, you'd last like me - literally an hour of straight fricking. i literally had texts from chicks saying they couldn't walk the next day.
I went through a period where I would cum fast with my wife, it literally is all just in your head. I was so frustrated by it and we would have conversations but it wouldnt help. One time though we were about to frick and she could see I was nervous as I knew I was gonna bust so quick and she just held my face for a second and said "Don't worry about it, I just want to have sex with regardless of how long it lasts" she then kissed me. Not sure why but it made all the insecurity melt away and we had sex for about 40 minutes. It helps when your wife/gf is your cheerleader and not working against you or working it worse.
Long story I guess but here we go
>Had an ex who constantly wanted sex
>She didn't put in any effort so it was no fun and I was just a tool, which isn't as fun as it sounds
>More and more pressure
>Sex confidence went down because without stimuli I couldn't get it up
>Break up
>Next gf
>Always stop me before I make her orgasm
>This is no fun for me
>Take her virginity
>Frick it up somewhat, trouble getting hard because other ex
>Sex isn't great because she's even ashamed to be naked, weird thought process
>Break up eventually
>Covid hits, gyms closed, decide to start running instead since I have nothing else
>Cardio is fantastic
>Cardio makes me fit as frick
>Decide to tinder and frick around
>Mindset of 'frick it, I'll just have fun'
>Get some matches
>Also frick a powerlifter from the gym
>"I didn't tell you anon, but you made me come multiple times"
>Frick a match from tinder
>Frick someone I met at an event at a bar
>Tindermatch becomes gf, has high libido just like me
>Our day together the time after we frick for, no joke 3 to 5 hours, water breaks and all
>No more trouble getting it up
>Can decide when I do or do not cum most of the time
I jerk off multiple times a day, watch a shit ton of porn but have no problem getting it up. Cardio was literally the best thing I've ever done for my sex life. I just walked to the local lake 3-4 times a week and ran around it. I always make sure they come first by my hands or whatever means and that already has me rock hard from the foreplay.
I think I know you - SE QLD?
Nope, not whoever you have in mind. Kind of a funny coincidence you know someone like me though.
literally sounds like one of my boys lmao
Kek, I hope he's having a better time than me though, life's a bit shit lately.
Oh OP, this reminds me: with new people you always have to 'get used' to them. Kissing etc can be shit at the start, but it'll be fantastic after a while and communicating what you like/dislike.
How long do you do cardio for and how many days a week?
I have to admit I've been slacking for a while on it. I don't really go for runs anymore until after my holiday and buying some decent shoes. I mostly do Stairmaster or rowing ~3 or 4 times a week after my workout.
tbf shit partners will also frick you up. If the sex isn't going to be fun or there is so many self imposed rules (usually by the woman) then it can be difficult to stay in the moment. Women don't seem to get that men need foreplay too.
Stop overthinking, it's all in the head.
I am 28 years old and I never even kissed a girl
I recently couldn't fully get it up for a girl I was fricking with, it was terrible.
>super high libido
>porn addiction
>jerk off once or twice a day for years
>start taking fin
>begin noticing I don't have the urge every day
>go a couple days off
>talking to girl
>day before second date I jerk off in case we do shit (don't want to cum too quick)
>fricking around in car, drank a bit
>mentally find all the shit we're doing hot as frick
>can't get it up, soft and small and sad
>jerk a bit, she sucks it a bit
>get about 60%
>mentally screaming and losing edge and getting mentally fricked
>after a bit we just fricking stop
>drive her home
>driving home
>I cry for the first time in years
>girl ghosts me
>have no feeling in my pants for an entire week
>quit fin
>finally mentally getting okay
My ego was fricking destroyed. I'm still recovering.
but fin has no sides they told me
Supposedly the the erectile dysfunction only effects less than one percent of men. Might even be a placebo.
I'm not taking the chance and I don't care about my hair enough to lose my dick.
The first month apparently is a little rough then it supposedly gets a lot better.
Answer the following:
> Weight/Height
> How many servings/portions of fruit/vegetables you eat on the average day
> Your cardio routine (type, frequency, duration)
> How often you eat fast food/takeout
Literally everytime someone asks this it turns out one of the above is fricked.
What are the guidelines? I personally have seen some improvement from eating more fruit/less takeout. Have decent cardio and always ate some vegetables with meals if not takeaway or restaurant.
Do more cardio
Stop fapping
Hit 3 arginines an hour before
Hit a 5mg edible an hour before
>My anxiety
You fricking idiot, you were treating mental issues with bodily readjustments.
>I can't speak 3rd century Latin
>Must be my teeth
quit pornography and try not to think about sex for a while. It'll come back to you 🙂
Older woman at the gym is constantly eyeing me. How do I approach her and make it clear that I want to frick her fat piggy body and cum deep inside her without getting banned from the gym forever?
If she is eye fricking you go up to her after your workout and say hey you want to come back to my place? She will be shocked but if you are attractive she will say ok. Tell her to follow you in her car so she feels safer. Proceed to have sweaty hog sex without conversation and then make her leave immediately.
Er it would be best to suggest her place since I still live with my parents…
You aren’t ready.
I had kind of this issue while wearing a condom, finding myself having to force to stay erect and inevitably cooming fast. Turns out the condoms were too small and compressing my dick so i would barely feel anything. I have switched to magnum and have no problems anymore, anxiety solved too since now I just know it works