i'll start
>Come up to the mutli-machine to do dips
>There's a girl doing the exercise
>Coming to her as she starts doing the exercise
>Ask her how many sets she got left
>She looks at me, doesn't say anything and then looks at different direction
>Me, awkwardly asking again, "Oh, maybe she didn't hear or whatever"
>She ignores it
>Me staring at somewhere else waiting for her to finish
>Finishes the exercise
>"How many sets you got left?"
>"I have finished"
Oh god i wish i wasn't autistic
 CRIME Shirt $21.68 |
 |
CRIME Shirt $21.68 |
>doing weighted pullups
>sub 1pl8, Im practically a DYEL
>some guy comes up smiling and pointing as Im kneeling on the ground
>take earbud out to hear what he's saying
>"DUDE WOW, REGULAR PULLUPS JUST TOO EASY EH LOL"
>shake my head
>"I guess so"
>"HOW DO YOU DO IT BRO LMAO"
That's what everyone needs. Gym hype men are my favourite people.
>some dude got raped at Planet Fitness a few years ago
You weren't supposed to tell anyone about that moment we shared anon
>i guess they should have an alarm for that
Don't talk to people mid-set.
>be me
>start doing wagie job
>find out cute hr bunny goes to the same gym at different hour
>decide to wake up early and go at said hour
>have very lucid dreams about showing her my gains the night before
>day arrives
>hi anon
>hi
that was it
Wow he's literally me
>Coming to her as she starts doing the exercise
You deserve death
Not my awkward story - but I saw a kid who couldn't have been more than 13-14 all of a sudden start un-plating a guys 2pl8 bench. HE just decided to take a cardio walk - but kid thought he was completely done.
Me knowing he was a powershitter and he was going to hog the bench for an hour (which he did), I gave the kids a heads up that he's probably taking a 3-4 minute rest but he comes powerwalking back when he sees his plates on the floor.
I left after that cause my next machine opened up and I had to grab it and the kid just dealt with him - wonder what happened to him.
>yo i was on that bench
>sorry bro my bad *moves*
thrilling story u/cheezeburgers_with_friez
upvote for you my good sir
nah this kid was way too nervous for bro talk lmao - he was tryna explain himself every which way when I dealt with him.
>o-oh jheeze i didnt mean to take ur bench
yeah literally
who the frick does a cardio walk between benching sets. your story sounds gay af
>talking to people mid-set
come on anon
>notice girls looking my way more often now that i'm leaning out
>start trying to make small talk with a few of the regulars
>get a good interaction the first time but the second time I try to talk to them days later if we're close to each other always get the cold shoulder like she doesn't even know who I am
>usually take a bench to sit on because no one uses them when I go in the afternoon
>sometimes the girls I've made small talk do hip thrusts and always take benches
More than once using a bench near the squat rack as the gym is kinda small a girl I've made small talk with will instead go across the gym to grab a bench instead of asking if I'm using the one I have my stuff on right next to her.
Haha...it's not like I care hah...ah. I've stopped looking around completely now.
You have to accept - a mire is not an invitation. It's a tough lesson to learn - but some ladies really don't mind just appreciating a good bod and the odd hello and then getting back to business.
No casual friendships required.
>girl doing exercise
>hip thrusts
>i go up to her and say "hey I like your form, can you sex my penis?"
>she says no
>I ask why
>she says because im trying to work out
>say I don't care rofl
This is why you wait until she's done with her set to ask her to sex your penis
My gym's hack squat is about a meter behind a pair of hyperextension machines. Anyway
>taking my rest between sets of hack squats by sitting on the edge of the platform
>two women show up and take the hyperextension machine directly in front of me
>start using it to do Bulgarian split squats while facing me like pic related
>our faces are centimeters apart the entire time
>this hilarity continued until I finished all of my sets and left
The hyperextension machine next to them was unoccupied so I don't know why they didn't just use that one. Neither of us said anything to the other either.
I could have rested elsewhere after the first time they did it, but I was there first anyway, and found it hilarious so I just kept sitting on the platform lol
>>our faces are centimeters apart the entire time
should've kissed her
>be me
>at the gym
>fricking weirdos everywhere
>talking to dad
>doing curls
>qt honey walks in
>gives me "the look"
>goes to the bench area
>take out my blue tooth
>come at her
>open bobs please b***h lasagna
I guess just all the times I've failed mid set and the safety catches it, if I put the safety rail up to the second rung it still lets the bar touch my chest but won't let it kill me or nothing when I fail. If there's a guy there he'll usually come over and offer to help, I'm grateful but this is just how I do it because there's nobody who'll spot for me.
Why dont you just ask someone to spot you? I do it every time i bench, and im antisocial moron borderline autistic.
that's definitely the smart thing to do
>gym is hotter than usual and I sweat quickly and easily
>decide to finish up my workout with some pistol squat learning just cause I always wanted to do it
>bring a bench over to the side corner away from everyone to stay out of the way and just go at it having fun trying to learn
>notice a gym thot in bubblegum pink leggings walking around doing her thing
>i think she noticed me mirin her but just go back to my shit without really caring
>out of nowhere bubblegum girl comes to my corner and starts doing back extensions on that machine
>didn't realize it till she was doing it that I put the bench right BEHIND that machine
>have a perfect view of her ass and when she bends over can practiaclly see insider her
>don't know what to do but autism out and say to myself "i was here first she knows what she's doing so I'm not moving.'
>this goes on for a few minutes till sometime catches my eye as I'm resting and she begins doing her set
>underneath the machine under her I keep seeing this weird thing on her phone but can't make it out
>just zoned out trying to figure out what I'm seeing
>she stops at the bottom position and I see it
>it's her reflection in her phone screen...staring right back at me between her legs..right under her fat clit and butthole
>start blinking rapidly and look away
>she gets up and turns a little so she's not really looking at me but like side eyeing me
>finally our eyes meet and I guess my dick takes over literally jump off and say hi
>oh hi
>i'm anon
>im anonette
>frozen smiling like an idiot staring in her eyes when she laughs and looks away
>i'd shake your hand but i'm sweating so much and I don't want to sweat all over you
>she makes a weird face while laughing
>well it was nice meeting you..i'll be behind you
>....i know
>before I can register what she said she goes back to doing another set
My phone rang with something I HAD to answer but I didn't realize how red and sweaty I was till I got back to the restroom after the whole thing
You should have went ahead and gone for the sniff anon, it couldn't have made the situation any less awkward than it already was
Buhduh da dongo bongo bungo buhduh da dongo bum go bongo
>go to the gym super early before the morning crowd hits
>2 or 3 women doing meme sub-1pl8 hip thrust variations
>just leave the fricking loaded barbells all over the place on the floor when they're done
>plate-loaded hip thrust machine completely unused
>random assortments of kettlebells and dumbbells strewn everywhere
>looks like a goddamn tornado went through the place
I never noticed before because eventually someone will use that shit and put it back where it belongs. But goddamn not a single one of them would put anything back up, they'd just leave it where it sat.
>Go to 24/7 gym
>Go at 4AM to avoid all people
>Someone is there already for some reason
Bros.... i got flustered and pretended wasnt going to the gym
>walk into the gym
>see person
>walk out
>mfw person had no idea
I instastalk a bunch of the regular girls at my gym and know way too much about them
Once in a while I'll actually strike up a conversation with one and constantly remind myself to play dumb even though I already know her name, her dog's name, her kids names, why she wasn't around last week, etc
post em
>About to leave the gym and I open my locker
>Look through my bag to find my phone is missing
>Go to the area where I was last working out
>I find the bench I was last doing dumbbell presses at
>Pick up some phone next to a guy mid-set next to his legs.
>"That's my phone" says the guy
>Hastily explain that i'm looking for my phone and that it was somewhere around this area probably.
>Another guy offers to call my phone to try and locate it
>Give him my number from memory
>Phone rings in my bag
>"Yeah I found my phone now."
>Leave
I don't really feel awkward since I don't care about anything.
> be Me at the gym doing curls
> 3 dyel skinny girls working out (maybe 100 lbs each)
>one of them pulls an 80 lb barbell off a rack
> instant failure
>tries putting it back
>cant
>girl 2 tries to help her
> girl 3 calls girl 1 a moron or something
> I go and grab the weight and rack it for them
> "thanks"
>"np"
> they all leave