>be me
>flash flood hits my town
>every road near where I am is overflooded
>will get washed away if I try walking through it
>use pipe connected to a building to climb upwards with functional grip strength
>vault over roof
>jump across a couple buildings
>climb down using bodywedge technique once I reach high enough grounding
>Everyone else is stuck under the bus stop but that's their fault for being weak dyels
>
Shopping Cart Returner Shirt $21.68 |
nice larp homosexual
>be me
>out driving
>fallen tree blocks road
>get out of car and move it
>probably not more than 150kg
>hop into car and drive a few meters
>go out again to put the tree back to make sure no dyels will get past
>comimg home from class
>twin sisters move in on my dorm
>see their dad carrying their stuff up the stairs
>they have a small washing machine
>offer to help
>dad thanks me, tells me to wait for him so we can carry it together
>oly lift the washing machine, place it on my shoulders, Atlas style, and carry it up the stairs solo
>dad is amazed
>sisters mirin
>got to bang one of them that semester
6 years ago, damn
omegakek
>banged one of my twin half sisters
Good work, anon. Livin' the dream.
choked on my drink reading this
Hehehe
The weak should be inconvenienced by the strong.
the weak should fear the strong
>me and my buddy built a shed in the outskirts
>we lift in this shed
>it isnt locked
>however the door is all fricked and shitty and I put a tiny knob on there to grab onto
>only strong fingers may enter
Got a personal trainer job offer from the female managers at a Blink gym instead of being banned after two people complained about me intimating them and being aggressive. I'm not even a member, I was there as a guest lol.
intimidating them how?
mogging them openly and without remorse
Nothing big, but all the little things have changed.
Shit like reflex speed, either my muscles responding faster or my mind being clearer and reacting quicker, like when you fumble a pen or some shit, I catch it every time now, when a year ago it would have hit the floor.
People apologise for getting in my way ALL the time now when before I was practically invisible.
Slampig older women eyehump me and even grab my arms and shoulders while talking to me, which gives a massive boost to my mood and test.
The subconscious acknowledgement that your fit peers regard you as equals, and lesser creatures clearly regard you as either superior specimens or cope with "muh intelligence" etc assuming I'm a moron cos I go to the gym.
Being IST changes everything.
This is a weird one, but I was on a Carribean island doing a hike. On my way down, maybe 2km from the trailhead I met a family; one of their kids, skinny 16yo maybe, was down with heatstroke. He was in a bad way. Nobody had any water and I was looking after some old Americans at the time, so I delivered them to the bus and went back, with water and sugary drinks. The family had started carrying him down and were doing an OK job but none of them were especially IST. I gave my backpack to the father, took his soj on my back and carried him back to the trailhead in one push, no rests. Genuinely think that lunges and squats game me the strength to do it. Sat him down in the shade, splashed him with water, got some drinks down him and he was walking in half an hour.
I like to imagine that he and his siblings now lift/exercise.
Doing God's work and I hope you did inspire them.
This is also why I lift.
Holy based. You probably did start those kids' fitness journey. Great job fren.
Father got mogged hard
Father was actually in decent shape. One of the kids was pretty big but slightly chubby. Kid with heatstroke was, fortunately, Chalamet-mode and probably weighed like 50kg max
Well fricking done, Anon
>See open window in house with no one inside
>Do pull-up
>peek around
>get inside house
>burglarize it
>skin darkens slightly more
lol that reminds me of the old zelda cgi games where people would materialize out of pixels. you materialize into a black man
lmfao
on saturday i was close to being assaulted by a team of players because of a call i made (referee) at the end of the game. one player ran at me so i stepped forward into him chest to chest and he went down, a teammate came over and took a swing at me, i ducked at then knocked his ass out cold and everyone was too afraid to approach me after that
So you are just going to keep repeating this story across the board?
i got a 20% raise this year because i did a 5 man demo job by myself in 1 week. moved 20000 lbs of construction debris and filled a dumpster. makes me wanna get a quick deadlift/bench sesh in real quick right now
I cut labor costs by 80% because I found some sucker who does the work of 5 men for the price of 1.2.
Although I'm not at the level to call myself really fit, the added energy has helped me.
Ok
It's not really interesting, but ever since I started lifting 6 months ago I've noticed my job which involves moving milk crates and stuff has gotten much easier. I try to squat the crates whenever I can to practice my form and make sure I don't hurt my back.
I can do my job in less than half the time I'm scheduled to work, so I nap and exercise at work.
I can open most jars
>have good cardio
>now-ex girlfriend likes it hard
>giving her the D
>she takes a while to cum
>tell myself I'm only allowed to speed up, but never slow down
>start slow and ramp up
>10 minutes in I'm still pumping
>she screams my name
>imagine I'm jumping rope or something and I can't stop
>roommates definitely heard her yell that she's cunming
>leave the b***h satisfied and she'll come back for more
I miss her sometimes, breaking up is starting to feel like a mistake when you're 5 months into a dry spell with no prospects in sight.
Why did you break up, anon?
From experience, a b***h who's pussy is so numb it takes 15 minutes of jackhammering to make her cum isn't a long term prospect.
I went from a b***h who seemed utterly incapable of orgasming to one who cums on my dick multiple times with seemingly very little effort.
In retrospect I know my ex was a cold, frigid b***h with a shit sex drive that was never that into me, I was just her best prospect at the time.
My current is genuinely nuts about me.
She took so long to O because she was pretty innocent when I met her, she didn't know how body very well because she seldom jerk offs. I think she didn't know how to orgasm from being penetrated, so it took a long time. Broke up because we wanted different things and we just fought all the time. Sex was good though so I stuck around longer than I should have.
I've been with so many of these women. It's awful, and I'll never do it again.
>baby bird fell out of its nest in my neighbors yard
>haven't climbed a tree in years
>cute teenage girl and her parents can't get up there
>hold the bird in my left hand, 1 hand climb that b***h 25+ feet
>deposit baby birdy
Would've never been able to do that even 2 months ago with such ease
nobody tell this guy
Yeah… 🙁
>1 hand climb that b***h 25+ feet
Terrible larp kys
>Be me
>Prey on gym bros who leave gym
>They all went to failure, had leg day, are overtrained etc. so they can't fight back
So yeah, them being fit helps me immensely irl. Already made 3000$ this months from selling smartphones, stealing cash etc.
>thinks an exhausted gym bro isn't still more than a match for some normie trying to rob them
Nice larp.
Unless you're robbing dyel broccolihead zoomer gays, in which case based
>be me, sledgay
>1:30am, apartment complex gate closed
>flash blue thing at goyreader
>not opening
>it's busted
>maintenance here is useless and probably won't even pick up
>thisiswhatwetrainedfor.gif
>exit car
>get hands in gate gap
>push
>it's stubborn but it's working
>get it open enough to better angle my arm and body and get some leg drahve
>opensesame.gif
>drive through
>enter wagelair and fap to alexa scout
>be me
>get up in the morning
>excited to be alive and live an active lifestyle.
>be me
>get up in the morning
>feel like death
>force myself to eat breakfast and drink water b/c I feel nauseous af
>go to the gym feeling like shit
>go home after my workout feeling like a million bucks
>do nothing all day cause the workout endorphins have made me satisfied enough
>repeat
I mention it once asked about hobbies during a job interview. I look physically in great shape and it sells the point that I'm healthy, organized and work hard. It's a very positive hobby to mention and talk about in career context and if the other person is into fitness or trying to improve him or herself then this opens up the conversation quite a bit in your favor.
I believe it hindered me in an interview once;
>looking into going into high school teaching English
>dominated by liberal women and onions cucks apart from gym teachers
>a well built dude should be a shoo-in for high school teaching, strong male role model etc
>video interview over covid
>two interviewees
>the basedest of onions weakling beta cucks, bald, dyel
>liberal feminist dumb b***h
>ffs.jpeg
>can tell the cuck hates me
>liberal chick pretends she doesn't hate me but I can practically hear her brain repeating the phrase "toxic male" over and over
>naturally I don't get the job.
>lose interest in the job anyway while I'm spending time in schools and see shit like a niglet kicking a blonde girl's chair accusing her of racism for not going out with him, UK grime being played in GCSE Music class, and most kids being pakis or niglets
Even in my current graphic design job i have to tone myself tf down because everyone else is a gay/beta/feminist.
I do great in normie environments, so these are just anecdotes, but there are environments where being IST just puts a "MUH TOXIC MALE" neon sign over your head.
Wouldn't trade it for the world tho
Man I want to get into teaching is it really that shit?
I'm in the UK. Yes, it's that shit, here at least.
I've taught guitar and creative writing semi-professionally, and I love teaching, so I was really excited to get into it, but teaching in bong state schools really is just making sure the UK's pet niglets and pakis never get offended and stifling any kind of creativity, independence or real intelligence.
I haven't given up on teaching, but I won't be doing it in schools. Private tuition is the only good education really, because they've chosen to be there.
It was a shame cos when I was actually in the schools doing experience and shit, the kids really liked me. The boys could see that I could lift so respected me (the white boys at least. The niglets and pakis behaved as revoltingly as you can imagine) and the girls respond well to men that they feel safe around that isn't some lecherous sex pest or a beta queer.
Also UK, in Cardiff. I try not to be racist but man i can't stand Muslims.
Were I a single man I'd have moved to asia to teach English and frick asian qts long ago, but here we are.
Are private schools not an option? Public schools are hell everywhere but always wondered what your credentials you would need for higher class teaching
Meanwhile I got my teaching job when the school did a background check. My social media is full nothing but my hobbies: Hiking, lifting, shooting and hunting. The principle and other interviewer found it, well not based exactly, but pretty close. Apparently they wanted a masculine teacher as a role model for some of the more unruly boys.
How about fitness dick in your mouth, jamal.
>carrying bushels of firewood down the beach for a fire
>passing groups of people around their own fires
> "bro this guy is jacked"
>"this guy is a chad"
>literally being called a chad by random groups of people for carrying massive amounts of firewood
>feel good until I realize I went to the wrong beach and have to carry the firewood all the way back anyways
>eventually get to my actual fire, get piss drunk, see my oneitis there, she says like three words to me and I black out and apparently run away crying the entire night
>haven't left me house since because I'm so embarrassed
Sorry for blogpost but I need to get it off my chest I'm so embarrassed and I'm never drinking again
What did she say to set you off you homosexual carrying homosexual?
I unironically cannot remember so brutal
Sounds more like autism than alcoholism tbh