>wake up in the body of the Minister of Health

>wake up in the body of the Minister of Health
>Biden has given you the goal of defeating the obesity issue by the end of the year by any means.
what would you do?

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  1. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    kill myself

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      50% chance I'd do this

      https://i.imgur.com/7pvg247.jpg

      >wake up in the body of the Minister of Health
      >Biden has given you the goal of defeating the obesity issue by the end of the year by any means.
      what would you do?

      Other 50% = Gladiator style combat for fats, nationally televised. Starve em for a week then throw them in a pit together. Winner gets donuts, loser gets put back in the camps.

  2. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    make it illegal to wear athletic clothes if you're not athletic

  3. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    >what would you do?
    Dilate, I guess

  4. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    lose some weight first

  5. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    End public schooling. I went from playing outside and walking in the woods to sitting in a chair eating prepacked Sysco turnovers and drinking root beer every day.

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      Based. Closing the child gulags should be public policy priority #1
      >frees dumb kids to work
      >frees smart kids to self-actualize faster
      and best of all
      >keeps women at home
      It would solve literally everything

  6. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    >make seed oils illegal
    >make gym memberships tax deductible
    >ban vending machines
    >mandate public school lunches can only be made from scratch with unprocessed whole foods
    >increase PE requirements for all schoolchildren
    >immediately end subsidies for corn and basedbeans, shift those subsidies to regenerative ranchers and farmers
    >have the heads of every major processed food corporation executed on television

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      contd
      >making children obese is now a felony, children are taken into protective custody
      >whitehouse twitter account would be used to publicly shame the fattest citizens every week
      >remove citizenship from fat acceptance activists
      >annual deportation of the top 3% of fattest citizens to Canada

      • 10 months ago
        Anonymous

        children obese is now a felony, children are taken into protective custody
        This should be implemented even without the other shit. It's the inverse of starving a child.

  7. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    resign and collect my performance-free pension for the rest of my life

  8. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    i activate the Death Squads

  9. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    >calorie count on all alcohol
    >schools below grade 9 cannot serve beverages other than water and milk
    >cereal above a certain sugar content cannot be marketed as cereal in any way
    >PE class mandatory every year till grade 11. varsity athletes exempted.

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      >calorie count on all alcohol
      That’s a good one. Once I got a beer that did list the calories and it definitely made me less likely to have another

  10. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    >the minister of health is an obese troony
    jews really did a number on you

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      yup
      at least we don't have belgium's health minister.
      obese troony vs. morbidly obese ogre. I want neither to be in charge of my country's health

      • 10 months ago
        Anonymous

        Looks like one of those terrifying caricature puppets from 80's tv shows.

      • 10 months ago
        Anonymous

        She's just bulking bro, it's off-season for her. She will be shredded for next year's parliament.

  11. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    fire every administrator in the FDA and hire new ones that arent corrupted yet

    id also propose a small tax break for individuals that have a normal BMI

  12. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    tax all “””~~*food*~~””” severely and give tax cuts to people who aren’t going obese. Take away fat children from parents if the children do not lose weight

  13. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    Lagalize murder of anyone above 30% BF and women.

  14. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    Once someone meets the definition of obese they have 1 year to get to a healthy weight or they will be sectioned at their own expense and forced to lose weight.

  15. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    Make it where your body fat % correlates with your taxes. If you're 40% body fat, you pay 40% tax. If you're 15% body fat, you pay 15% tax.

  16. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    Put a sin tax on processed food, alcohol, soda and any other added sugar beverage. Lobby the department of education to add mandatory Lifestyle classes to curriculums that teach kids how to cook and stress the importance of exercise. Any parent that sends an obese child to school gets a meeting with CPS and unless they can provide medical documents certifying their kid has a one in a million hormonal condition that inhibits their ability to lose weight, warn them to cut off the fricking treat nozzle or have their kid sent to a work camp

  17. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    Don't let student progress in school unless they meet a strict fitness standards. For example can't graduate highschool unless you can do 3 pull ups a man, 1 as a woman.

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