Can ya'll pass this?

Can ya'll pass this?

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  1. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    For any military fitness test, just passing is like getting a D- in school, you’ll be seen as a shitbag. It’d be better to ask to if fit can get a max or near maximum score.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      I remember in the last stage to get accepted to become an officer, literally half the c**ts couldn't hit the bare minimum fitness requirements - and they all got accepted.
      They rejected the two guys who dominated the fitness requirements - me and another guy, both got above 80 pushups and 13+ on the beep test.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Incredible, the army is even more fricked up than I originally imagined.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        There’s more to being an officer than just being in shape. You’re probably psychologically fricked, mentally moronic or maybe medically screwed up in some way. That being said if the other people couldn’t even pass the easy ass bare minimums they have no business being officers either.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          Half the officers I served under were on profiles. Officers are the biggest shit birds in the Army who suffer no consequences for the shit they pull. They’re one of the major reasons we didn’t achieve our objectives in the GWOT and the only reason why the armed forces generally can’t meet recruitment numbers and has had morale issues for like a decade. If a Stalinist purge of the officer corps happened tomorrow we’d likely be better off in the long term. Also any benefits of any officer who got out above O5 should be stripped for them losing every war in a generation.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            >we didn’t achieve our objectives in the GWOT
            What are you talking about? Israel's neighbors got destabilized and a bunch of people in DC made a shitload of money. It achieved exactly what was intended.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          >No medical problems
          >Currently doing a PhD in math
          >No psychological problems (at least according to the psychiatrist who examined me).

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Never be first, never be last

  2. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    I don't even know what those acronyms mean. Incomprehensible chart.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      I was in the Army before they started this and I dont know what any pf that shit is eather lol

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        This shits been out almost a decade you boomer lmao

  3. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    What the FRICK does this mean. It makes absolutely zero sense

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >MDL
      Maximal deadlift. 1x3 trap bar Diddy
      >SPT
      Standing power throw. Number is the distance you have to throw a ball backwards over your head in meters.
      >HRP
      Hand release push ups. Push ups but you have to touch your chest to the ground and do a T pose at the bottom.
      >SDC
      Sprint Drag Carry. Sprint 50m, drag a 90lbs sled 90m, side shuffle 50m, carry 2 40lbs (maybe) kettlebells 50m, then Sprint another 50m. Number is the time limit.
      >PLK
      Plank. Number is time.
      >2MR
      2 mile run.
      The events are done in order over about an hour.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Forgot to mention, the ball is like a 15lbs medicine ball or something.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Gay and moronic, fat black women pass this every day. I'm a helicopter rescue swimmer in the USCG and this is our PT test done quarterly

        >deadlift complex: deadlift, immediately into 100m sprint, immediately into 5 pullups
        >Max pushups
        >Max bodyweight rows
        >side plank
        >Max pullups
        >3x300m shuttle sprint
        Straight to
        >500m swim
        >6x50m swim sprints
        >4x50m swim sprints towing a 180lb+ person
        >4xunderwater swim/sprint back to start

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          That test is the generic pencil pusher one. Combat arms jobs have other tests in addition.
          That definitely sounds challenging though. Is deadlift complex done for time? Are there variable scores or is it pass/fail?

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        >Hand release push ups. Push ups but you have to touch your chest to the ground and do a T pose at the bottom.
        the frick is this shit? for 100 points roughly 4s per rep that's over 4 minutes of humping the floor

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          You only get 2 minutes.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            they'll call an ambulance for you thinking you are having a seizure if you go that fast

            • 2 months ago
              Anonymous

              Last time I maxed in 90 seconds. It's not hard if you train it.

  4. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    I cant believe they went with this moron shit. It should have been a rope climb, farmers carry, 200m sprint and the 12 miler.

  5. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    I don't know any of these acronyms but I am definitely fitter than the average zogbot

  6. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    I choose to identify as a woman for my tests. that's ok right army?

  7. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    >goyshart mutt golem army listing female above male

  8. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    So why would males and females have different standards? If you need X strength level to do the job why would you need 1/2 X if you're a woman?

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Wait until you find out about university entrance scores

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Because it's the law chud. Only bigots discriminate against non yt pipol

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Originally it was done that way and something like 80% of women couldn't pass.
      That was mostly due to an event that was basically a half pull up starting from the bottom and 60% of women couldn't do one.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      The same reason there are different standards for different ages - inclusion

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Because the test is less about your job and more about kicking you out before you become a health liability.
      If you can't pass PT chances then you're unfit, in other words, unhealthy and either presently or in the near future will be costly in terms of medical care.

  9. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    I crush MDL
    Never done SPT so can't comment
    I crush HRP, maybe even be flashy about it
    I'll gas on the SDC my cardio is shit
    PLK I can do in my sleep
    2 Mile Run I fail miserably at again cardio is shit

  10. 2 months ago
    Anonymous
  11. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    I can't make heads or tails of this stupid chart

  12. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    No but I can goon for 6 hours straight

  13. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Im a GenX old gay. From what Ive seen over the past thrity years - people Ive known, people I've met, news reports - the entire military is a bunch of pussies.

    Yeah, yeah: the Seals, the green berets. Fine. Those are the top .01 performers. These are guys that would have been Division 2 athletes but they wanted to enlist. Fair enough. They are fit, strong and maybe even smart.

    But the rest of the military - enlisted and officers - seem to be fricking pussies. They are weak. They are small. They are jogging enthusiasts. They are women. They are tiny Mexicans.

    You can cherry pick the rare impressive one among them, but I have met way too many complete pussies who were in the military to be impressed. Not. Impressed.

  14. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    since op is 17 and doesnt understand anything about technology heres a better image for everyone.
    This shit is a fricking joke and designed for fatbodys to stay in judging on those 60th percentile scores.

  15. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    No. I'm fat and also moronic. You'll just have to send somebody else.

  16. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Nice try but you ain't profiling me for the draft

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