>character drinks coffee and doesn't have to run to the bathroom to take a shit

>character drinks coffee and doesn't have to run to the bathroom to take a shit

Immersion ruined

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  1. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Colonlet thread

  2. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Vince has to take a shit in the restaurant right after this though

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Damn, I didn't remember that. I guess Tarantino really pays attention to detail

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >when you take 1 sip of coffee and the turtle sticks its head out right away

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous
    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      and he takes a shit before he dies. he seems to shit a lot.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Heroin makes you constipated, or shit a lot, idk, I'm not a junkie.

  3. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Is coffee a laxative?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      caffeine has a laxative effect, yes. if you drink too much of it you’ll get nasty stomach cramps

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        No, it's the milk for some people or the too hot water that does it, not the coffee itself. Drink hot water with a squeeze of lemon in it and it will give you the same effect.
        Tea too, but most people take their tea at a cooler temp than their coffee.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          I have scar tissue in my urethra and the doctor's advice was "not to drink anything diuretic"
          Turns out almost everything but water is just that.
          I drink it anyway

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Facebook mom science. Caffeine causing contractions in your digestive tract is common knowledge and very well researched

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            It's not. Look it up. You tlak about Facebook mom science when this is what the caffeine thing is.

  4. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    coffee never really noticeably makes me shit, but it makes me piss 0 to 60 in 3.28 seconds

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      When was the last time you had your prostate checked? Sounds like it’s time

  5. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >pull into jimmy's house
    >no Dead Black person Storage sign
    >drag in dead Black person irregardless

    don't they know we live in a society?

  6. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I used to work in an office with a guy who would pour himself a cup of hot coffee and then put a bunch of ice in it because he said "It's the heat that makes people have to take a shit". I'm pretty sure that's not true.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I used to work in an office with a boomer who would first get the coffee from the machine and then microwave the cup for 30 seconds before drinking it. Boomers are strange

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I used to work in an office with a boomer who would first get the coffee from the machine and then microwave the cup for 30 seconds before drinking it. Boomers are strange

      It prevents colonic infetterence.

  7. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >heroin addict shits more than once a month

  8. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I drink 6 coffees a day and haven't shit in 3 days

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      when was the last time you went a week without getting your fix? think you could do it?

  9. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >character tells all his coworkers that coffee is a drug and he doesn't need it
    >smokes weed all day after work
    This guy is a real jerk.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >weed turns heavy users into morons because it messes with their rem sleep
      >caffeine turns heavy users into morons because it messes with their rem sleep
      Turns out moderation is key if you’re going to do any drug. Damn, who would have thought

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I have two cups every work-day, at 10 AM and 2 PM. I also have a sandwich for lunch. Weekend and after 5 is just for beer and whiskey.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Alcohol nukes your brain 50 times worse than both caffeine and weed so yeah, no point skipping those two cups

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Sorry, could you repeat that?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        I have a cup at 11 am, occasionally, a cup of a much lighter coffee variety after lunch but no later than 4 pm, unless it's Friday and I intend to stay up late drinking. I only drink on Friday or Saturday evenings, but I'm trying to check that as I was drinking too much. No coffee during weekends except if I have a long drive or walk and I am sleep-deprived.
        What is really worrying me nowadays are my breakfast. I am not fat but I cannot feel full unless I have two slices of bacon and two eggs ach morning. I took up this regimen when I was into sports, but it stuck with me.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Patrick Bateman ass post

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        This is the most pointless post I have ever read on IST.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >drug users are moronic schizos

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        t. man who consumes a stimulant drug every morning to be able to function

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        It was just a joke. I'm too scared to talk to my coworkers.

  10. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I've heard it's not even that strong of a laxative. It's just that most people drink coffee to an empty stomach in the morning and that triggers the shittenings. Any liquid would do the same.

  11. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    coffee makes my piss smell like coffee

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >fooling around with gf
      >hop in the shower to give her a golden shower
      >piss on her face and breasts
      >she drinks my puss
      >coffee flavored (just drank a litty cup), she loves it
      >greedily gulps down ounce after ounce
      >suddenly, ger tumbly gets rumbly
      >has to shit
      >my coffee piss makes her have to take and urgent coffee shit
      >she shits as I piss
      >I slip on the shit, fall face first, eat a face full of fresh shit
      >I cum and shit from the rancid shit in my mouth and eyes
      >she starts to laugh, begins to piss
      >we're wallowing and writhing in a shower full of cum, piss, and shit
      >her mom walks in
      >opens the door
      >gets on the floor
      >everybody walks the dinosaur

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        I just want a virgin gf that I can slowly convince to indulge degenerate fetishes is that too fricking much to ask?

  12. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    For me it’s tea from a variety pack in the office

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >tea
      Everyone thinks you're gay.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        k

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      For me, it's tea that I brought in from my personal tea collection and keep in my cube.

      >tea
      Everyone thinks you're gay.

      t. coffeecuck

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >personal tea collection

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I didn't realize my wife posts on IST. Hi honey!

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        I’m leaving you for Jamaal

  13. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >mmm!

  14. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Coffee has never made me shit and I've been drinking like 12 cups a day since I was 14.
    You're just a weak ass girly man.
    Or you drink 'coffee' that has milk in it and you are lactose intolerant.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >thinks his severe addiction to a mild stimulant drug is a manly trait and not a weakness

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        It literally makes you shit yourself because of how strong it is you fricking zoombie, so yes, it is manly.
        Addiction? I stop for a week or two when I go on vacation and I don't feel any different. I don't even feel the need to have any. It's just that it's better than all the fricking other stuff I could drink in everyday life like cola full of fart bubbles, jices so full of sugar they make your inside melt or onions 'drinks' that makes you fart like a vegan at a free buffet.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >powering through the negative sides from drugs makes you a man
          Who are your role models? Meth heads and crack heads?

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >allergic to water
          don't tell us where you're from, we all know

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I can drink a liter of milk in one go no problem. I drink two cuppas every morning. But If I mix them I NEED to shit within 30 seconds.
      Explain that, gay.

  15. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    What are some actually good coffee brands?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Tim Horton's
      Dunkin Donuts
      Kirkland
      There's a bunch of artisan brands you can get into as well, but it's all about the same. The only coffee I don't like is Starbucks. Not talking about the syruppy stuff, Starbucks black coffee tastes like shit in my opinion

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Not real coffee. It's sugar sirup mixed with coffee. Fricking zoomers, I swear.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Based ESL

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            I'm more ADD.
            ASL? Are you on AOL?

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              Good morning sir!

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Do you feel DESIGNATED?!!

  16. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I never understood the coffee making you shit thing
    I've drunk tons of coffee and ever had the overwhelming need to take a dump.

  17. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I woke up this morning and had two coffees over a couple hours with no bowel movement. then I smoke half of a spliff and had to put it out to take a massive shit

  18. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I'm on 600mg caffeine right now and still feel tired.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I heard tanning your butthole helps.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Take a month off, you junkie. It's not going to be pleasant but you need it

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