Does she want to date me? I'm concerned, I am 20, she is a few years older than me, early 20s. If so, should I ask her if she finds me attractive or what man she finds attractive so I can rule myself out?
To set things straight, she just wants to meet me before our families reconnect after 15 years or so. Any ways I can know she doesn't want to date me?
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No, what you should really do is get checked for autism.
I am not autistic, I'm just really nervous, I've barely seen that side of the family in 20 years, only her and her mother 4 time
. Anyone on IST who says they are autistic without a diagnosis isn't likely to be autistic, and I am not autistic.
I know but she's a woman.
>I've barely seen that side of the family in 20 years
That's exactly why she asked to do something with you. You are autistic and miss the most basic of social cues. Normal people don't think about having sex with their cousin (unless she's model tier then alright fair game), you're missing the wavelength completely and you owe me at least a few thousand USD for saving you from lifelong social embarrasment if you tried to hit on your cousin.
I couldn't pay you anyway. It just seems odd, coffee with a a male
Cousin you've never spent time with fully on your own. I'm the male btw, she's the female. What if she does hit on me, what then? Also yes thanks for saving me. I am not autistic, of course I thought yeah sure she just wants to meet up but then I thought I've never dated a woman before, why is she asking me?
>I couldn't pay you anyway.
Don't worry, I was only being dramatic. I wouldn't actually expect that of someone. I can't speak for everyone but I think getting breakfast (coffee) with someone is just a good opener for someone you don't know well. Something like dinner or going anyplace else requires knowing a little bit about what they like or eat but there's something for anyone at any breakfast place.
>What if she does hit on me, what then?
I wouldn't bite
Well ok, this all makes sense thanks.
I've met her and her aunt a few times, but never on my own. What if how she dresses is a signal to me? What then?
It's 2024, women (and even men now) dress in many ways for no reason all the time, also not worth thinking too much into. If anything if you're that convinced don't make any advances at all during your time with her and just make a new thread here detailing the encounter, asking for thoughts.
But I'm only humoring it since your thoughts on the matter are rather persistent, see
Thanks fella, I understand, I'll just be chill as they say and things will work out ok.
are these posts a joke? have you never had any social interaction with a woman outside the context of dating? do you not ever just, y'know, talk to women?
My therapist is a woman, I've had a friend that was a woman (I kept my distance to protect her from my narcissism). I have talked to women, I was in a class in the end of highschool where I was the only guy, I didn't say much but the girls sitting behind me knew me well enough, all in all, I shouldn't be alive, I've been told to kill myself and I don't think I should be alive.
In my class, the girls knew me somewhat, other than the ones behind me who knew me a bit cos we had to do task together. Anyway, I won't get into it, but I am not a sex pest
Litteral example of a pornbrained person, bro woman or not she will not frick you, get a prostitute or something for that and leave BLACKED
I don't want to frick her, yes I am pornbrained and view almost every woman as a sexual being, not all but most, especially nurses and doctors.
Anyway, I can't have sex with someone I do not love or you know, someone I dont have a reason to be with them, as in I have to protect them because they are family.
I am not pornbrained man back off.
She’s your fricking cousin. Wtf
Sweet Jesus. Your cousin DOES NOT want to have sex with you. She IS NOT trying to take you out on a date. She is trying to get to know you. There is NOTHING about sex or dating or anything other than getting to know someone to whom she is already, by blood, related. DO NOT propose sex or anything with romantic undertones to your cousin. DO NOT think about having sex with your cousin. She is your COUSIN.
For frick's sake.
Also, you need to be careful with your wording, OP is already to sort out if he has a "fricking cousin."
Ok she does not want to, understood. I see her in two hours, should go fine
.
I legit think that nothing you described will happen, but thanks all the same.
Treat all women you don't know like your sister. She's just putting in effort to reconnect with estranged/lost family.
Trust me she won't be hitting on you lmao, and if she did just let that shit bounce off your forehead and don't reciprocate.
If you were a normal person this would all come naturally, you may not be autistic but somethings not right in there.
I'm totally normal, I just overthink, and I have to actively control my voice and face so that I don't seem narcissistic. That's all. Anyway, I'll be fine. Thank you for being real with me.
If making a thread on IST because you think a family member wants to frick you is normal then I guess you're normal.
No no no, you got it all wrong. Either way, don't worry about it.
>I'm totally normal
take it from a self-confessed normie, nothing you have posted in this thread is normal. honestly, not trying to shit on you or anything but your concerns here are so far from normal it's not even funny.
Alright man I'll take that on board. Tbh I am a normie but think how you want anyway
>she just wants to meet me before our families reconnect after 15 years or so
so then why the frick would you think she'd want to date you? she wants to have a chill meeting before a huge family reunion. dont be a spaz, just have coffee and catch up with her. this is a good thing dont ruin it with some fantasy of hooking up with your cousin because it will never happen
I don't wanna hook up with her, I don't like touching other living things with my penis so to speak.
I will be chill and see her, should be good.
You've got it very wrong friend. Stop misrepresenting me
If I had a hot cousin I’d definitely frick them. You’re a loser homosexual
With consent I hope.
NEWS FLASH = In the real world some people actually do meet up for reasons other than sex. Cousins who have never met just might want to say Hello. To leap to the conclusion that she might want your body - and even worse, to suggest that at the meeting - will brand you as an irredeemable wierdo.
We have met before so they know me but yes I will not bring up sex
>before our families reconnect after 15 years or so.
She either wants to set up the family reunion and expects both of you to bring flyers for renting the pavilion at the local county park, or she (possibly incorrectly) heard you are the genealogy guy and she wants to trade paperwork about dead relatives with you. Probably does not want anal.
Ask her if she wants you to bring anything. She's going to say either "party rental site flyers" or "photocopies of the (first...) civil war records" or "condoms". Or maybe all three if you're REALLY lucky. Either way, whatever she says will explain how the rest of the "date" goes.