>eye contact anxiety

>eye contact anxiety
>don't feel comfortable to make eye contact with other people especially when bulking because I think I'm too fat or ugly
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  1. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Women can't stop staring at me, not because I'm handsome, but because my face is like a fricking train wreck.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      How do you manage to make eye contact with them? I'm not handsome but I struggle to make eye contact with cute or good looking girls, I have no problem looking at uglier ones.

      cut

      I wanna gain another 10lbs 5k before I cut

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        >How do you manage to make eye contact with them?
        Hate is a powerful motivator. Theirs fuels mine.

  2. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    cut

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >CUT
      from the top people I wanna see DYNAMIC

  3. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Eye contact needs intent behind it, if you look at someone whilst in your head it doesn't matter if it's sustained contact if all you're projecting is shifty insecurity.

    Stop trying to suppress your internal monologue when you make eye contact and listen to it. You will sperg out a few times but eventually you will catch the thoughts and get to the bottom of why it makes you so uncomfortable.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Ok, you look like you know a lot about this shit anon but you said some words I cannot comprehend, what should I do instead?
      Just force eye contact x failure? What if my intent of making eye contact is solely the fact of me trying to lose this autism? I also struggle to make eye contact if the person is too far because of my astigmatism.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        I feel for ya brah but eye contact x failure really got me kek

        anyway I struggle with eye contact too as I don't wanna look perverse or aggressive. normal people just get in with it but feels uncomfortable for me. must be a stage of skipped development idk

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          >feels uncomfortable for me
          I know where you're coming from. I'd felt that way too. The only thing you can really do is force yourself to do it. You can also smile slightly or "loosen" up your facial expression while you do it

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >Eye contact needs intent behind it, if you look at someone whilst in your head it doesn't matter if it's sustained contact if all you're projecting is shifty insecurity.
      Second part of your post is clear, I indeed to get feelings I suppress that I should listen to, but this part I quoted I don't get. What does it mean if I look at someone without intent? Appreciate the post.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Ok, you look like you know a lot about this shit anon but you said some words I cannot comprehend, what should I do instead?
        Just force eye contact x failure? What if my intent of making eye contact is solely the fact of me trying to lose this autism? I also struggle to make eye contact if the person is too far because of my astigmatism.

        Easiest way to explain it, it's like trying to telepathically communicate your thoughts whilst using eye contact and body language to reinforce your verbal message. Like giving a girl you're flirting with frick me eyes. Girls can pickup on that sort of thing. (Don't use frick me eyes unless youve already established a flirting relationship with a woman or you'll be labeled a creep)

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >if you look at someone whilst in your head it doesn't matter if it's sustained contact if all you're projecting is shifty insecurity.
      can you reword this anon

  4. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    >have 10/10 eyes
    >maybe 7.5/10 face on good day
    >women always make eye contact and smile at me
    >look away because too afraid of smiling back and potentially being approached
    frick bros, why couldnt i just be ugly and autistic instead of mildly attractive and sperg as frick

  5. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    It’s the bulk 100%. You are self conscious that you are now an ogre and people know this too and they are not afraid to back down because you a fat ogre in their mind. It’s 2024 stop slopmaxxing and regain your confidence

  6. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    i always try to mog people by holding eye contact until they look away. if its a guy just stone cold stare and if its a girl then stare but smile. get fricking wrecked i bet i have eye contact mogged you before.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Kek whats the purpose of this? For canoeing?

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Kayaking

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      you try to look at me hard motherfricker and me and you gonna step outside and im gonna show you that you soft

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      You do realise you're being autistic and just making random strangers uncomfortable, right?

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >meanmugging random Black folk on the street
      Sounds like a good idea

  7. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    The one thing that helped me was just talking to boomers. They are great for practicing your social skills, they’ll talk about anything and for hours. Anytime a boomer wants to strike up a conversation, just sit and talk with him. The skills you learn directly impact your ability to talk with other people. Once you’re not shy about talking to strangers, the eye contact part comes naturally

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      This, boomers are based. I worked for like 4 years around nothing but boomers and i have learned so much from those based boomers

  8. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    i don’t even know what’s normal eye contact etiquette anymore. went to my physical therapist the other day and some IST 20 something grill replaced my old one apparently. she would hold eye contact with me until i broke it every single time, easily up to 6-7 seconds and i thought i was going crazy, who does that?

    then there’s this cute zoommette at my work who desperately avoids eye contact at all costs and just looks to the ground smiling. like what am i even supposed to do

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Bruh both of them were into you.

  9. 2 months ago
    Anonymous
    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Where's the bottom part of the intimate gaze? It goes outside the picture

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Right here

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous
        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous
        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous
    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >business gaze
      >just repeatedly roll your eyes at your future employee
      >that will land you the job

  10. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Like any other social cues, it’s really only going to seem natural if it is natural.
    At work, it’s important for me to seem interested in what customers are saying so I try to keep a fair amount of eye contact, my method is to try to notice things about their eyes as they talk. What color are they? How long are their eyelashes? Can I tell if they pluck their eyebrows?
    Seems legit since I’m staring at their eyes for a reason

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      How can you listen to them if you're thinking about their eyes?

  11. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    That's a symptom of actual autism

  12. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    I stare everyone in the eyes until they look away.
    The only "people" I don't do this to are thug looking blacks because I'm not trying to die because a low IQ chimp thinks my body language is aggressive and his chimp ass is animalistic to understand.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >The only "people" I don't do this to are thug looking blacks because I'm not trying to die because a low IQ chimp thinks my body language is aggressive and his chimp ass is animalistic to understand.
      Staring them straight in the eye is great though, because they're entranced (Blacks are very susceptible to hypnosis and such) by my light blue eyes that mog the frick out of their shit brown ones. You do have light eyes, right?

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        >my light blue eyes
        ngl black girls absolutely love that and they get entranced by them

  13. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    >go for a walk
    >see cute girl walking in the opposite direction towards me
    >try not to overtly show that I think she's cute and try to act "natural"
    >start walking manually
    >don't know where to look, want to avoid too strong eye contact but not make it obvious
    >hyper focused on how I'm walking and what I'm looking at
    >start wibbling and wobbling
    >staring up at a nearby tree, then slightly toward her, then a car etc
    >nearly fall over like 3 times in the span of 10 seconds
    >felt like hours
    >she finally passes by, now I can start breathing again
    >brain goes haywire
    >fantasize about said cute girl for months to no end imagining every possible scenario I could've done in that moment to actually start talking to her and win her over
    >go to such length that I even start imagining some absurd morbid scenarios like if only a car nearly hit her and I could've be the one who would see the car coming and save her from that situation and start a family with her everything
    >at this point I waste so much countless hours just thinking about that girl which I literally just saw one time for maybe like 8 seconds or so that I might as well have met her and have had experiences with her, just all in my head
    rinse repeat nearly every time I leave my house

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      I don't remember posting this. Weird.

      But yeah anon I can relate. This may be one of the reasons I rarely leave my house. Maybe.
      But even that isn't foolproof. This phenomenon is happening to me about a girl I haven't ever met because a friend of mine offhandedly told me our personalities would mesh well together. Also she's unbearably cute. That definitely plays a part.

      I am now training a sport just so that if I someday, somehow and for some reason have to play with her I don't embarrass myself (she's apparently very good at it already).

  14. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    can't you just look at the space between their eyes? that's what I do...
    please don't tell me they can tell

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      I can tell

  15. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    >up to 210lbs
    >got multiple mires this week from girls who have been regulars for a while but never even gave me a glance before
    this kills the skelloid

  16. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    I've trained myself somewhat, I try to always make and keep eye contact when ppl are talking to me. When I'm walking my dog I quickly look if a person passing me is making eye contact, thats when I usually say hi. Besides those things I dont know the etiquette of eye contact but it's trainable for autists for sure.

  17. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    the only difference between anxiety and excitement is your perspective on it. make yourself smile about your fear in the very moment, and it will transform in excitement or something related like slight mania or something. in either case this allows you to step over your fear much easier and face the actual problem. and in the case of eye contaxt maybe a smile isn't even a bad idea to begin with

  18. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    I’ve always had anxiety with this and I started to overcome it by just having state downs and not giving a frick if I looked like a psychopath, the goal was they look away first then I’m good. It was a little unhinged because I would just hold gaze and stare down random people if we made eye contact. It was easier with women, helped me stop thinking about it with them, eventually same happened with men. But I never got it perfectly I would never blink when I talked to people lmfao.

    Anyways, shit happened I fell into a depressed hole lost self esteem and reverted back but NOW, now the issue is way worse. It’s not just the normal issues of it being uncomfortable I have a tendency to stare at peoples lips and glance down at their lips from their eyes. Then it’s all I can stare at which is a little gay when it’s a dude, can creep women out too especially like a boss or co worker. In my head it’s literlaly
    >don’t look at the lips don’t look at the lips look at the eyes not the lips
    And then boom I’ve glanced at their lips or I’m having trouble keeping my eyes from constantly darting down like I’m trying to kiss them. So I don’t make eye contact anymore.
    That’s something I do when I’m hooking up to confirm I’m good btw, I’ll look at the girls lips and they understand, they reciprocate and do the same I’m good to make a move this has never failed me if I’m unsure about making a move. It’s fricked when I can’t help but do this with everyone it’s not even sexual for me, happens with men and even family. I hate it.

    My other issue is I stare out of my peripheral and can’t control it to the point I side eye people. I hate it bros. I read that this is all caused by porn addiction… wish me luck on quitting that, if it works I hope I can help others with similar issues…

  19. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    i'm an autistic staring two feet to the left or right someone cel
    I almost never make eye contact when talking, and my best conversations are when I'm walking around with someone and they're on my side so I'm not even looking at them

  20. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    i can make eye contact with people but i have to concentrate on it since it's not my normal habit, and when that happens i become too self-conscious to listen to them. how do i break the cycle

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