I have some fitness/martial arts goals but those will come to pass in no time. I don't know if I want a family. I know that I don't want to work a 9-5 forever, even if it is a cushy software dev Job. I've always dreamed of starting my own business but I wouldn't even know where to start. Ive thought about it a lot. I like to be good at things I do, which includes my job, but I don't want to put so much effort into becoming a good software dev when all it nets you is a better paycheck working for someone else.
Not to mention a lot of very smart people seem to think AI is about to frick shit up in the next decade. For now I distract myself with fitness and chasing women, but I know over the next few years these thoughts are going to become my greatest challenge. What is to become of me by 40? A family man working a 9-5 for someone else? I'm sure it's not so bad. I'm sure it's good even, I just don't think it's what I want.
I dont know anons. I just don't know. One day I'm going to wake up and life is going to have been and gone. I need to make sure I don't regret how I've spent it..
Frick society, just want the money to buy the stuff, and being wfh is the cherry on top. Sorry that you have social needs you can't fulfil online or with the pleasure of your own company
>Why don't you try getting a job that actually has a tangible impact on society i
Tech does have a tangible impact on society. Forgoing things like tech, law, science, & art to go be a tradesman is precisely why you're taxed to death, legally liable for chastising a troony, will get automated, and have no good entertainment all while you clean Democrat toilets.
I'd gladly work with my hands if it afforded me any real power and influence instead of making me an even bigger cuck.
Water please. I got so drunk last wednesday that i've only recovered today. I didn't make much of a fool of myself in the bar, but rest of the night was skecthy. Problems started(honestly when i opened the first beer) when I accidentally locked myself out and was either too stingy or drunk to call the housing servises to open my door. Started the 10km walk to my dads place in 10cm snow and light shoes. Bought some extra beer at 6am. Got more than half way but tried to take a bus for the last half. That was a big mistake since I ended up going to the wrong direction and i was 10km away again. Caught a cab. For some reason my pants were wet, but i'm still not sure if it was just a ruptured can of beer from my pack or had i just pissed myself.
Overall not too bad, at least compared to how it usually goes but i'm more than glad that i've managed to cut down my drinking to ~once a month. As you can propably deduce from my irrelevant story i have trouble controlling after i start. I just got absolutely fed up with my neet life and repeatedly waking up wishing that the day was already over. I've got some serious health issues and can't properly exercise anymore, so my life lost a mighty chunk of meaning. The take away from this blog post should be to diversify your coping methods before you need to. 3 years down and I'm still struggling to live meaningfully and deal with life without exercising the feels away.
Seltzer water, please.
The shame and guilt of ghosting my training partners at the gym and my last job still haunt me. Lifting doesn't help; I just feel disappointed when I'm done because I know the gyms I used to train with are going harder and making way more gains. Money wise, I've had a bunch of expenses come up and may have to buy a new car soon. God, I feel sick to my stomach most nights.
To keep it IST, I just finished a calisthenics routine: 5 pullups, 10 ring dips and 20 squats with a kettlebell, for 7 rounds, followed by 4 rounds on the heavy bag. want to get below 170 before the end of the year, currently 179 at 5'8
Just got diagnosed with autism as an adult. The initial evaluation I took had a score of 65/240 as the lowest end for diagnosis. Average autistic guy gets a score of 130 or so and I got 175. Therapist said that I made it this far because I'm also very above average intelligence (150ish IQ) so I could still catch and emulate patterns even if I don't actually feel or understand why I'm supposed to act a certain way. I'm 28 and I'm nearly a NEET but I'm trying my best. Even had a few gfs but even when things were getting serious I was still weirdly disconnected apparently even if it was obvious I loved them. It makes a lot of sense looking back on my life getting this diagnosis. I don't really know what to do with this information but it's on my mind a lot these past few days.
Is it worth being diagnosed properly? Or would you have been better off having no clue? I’ve asked multiple therapists and they never gave me a legitimate test just said “no you’re normal haha” or “no I have a nephew who is autistic he’s 8 years old you’re nothing like him.”
Which isn’t exactly helpful… Who do I see, a specialist? Or have I just had shit luck with lazy therapists? >high IQ
When I was a young child, pre kindergarten age, the teacher told my parents to have me tested. She said I had behavioral issues and thought I was Asperger’s. My parents took me to some old guy, and I did a few shape puzzles with him and then spent the time being a smart ass and talking bakc and trying to ignore him to play with the toys he had in his office and made it difficult for him to actually do his job. He seemed to just give up and lose patience and told my parents I was normal but I was advanced for my age.
BUT through my whole life I’ve had so many similarities to the average autist. I at times wonder if my parents knew but kept it from me worrying it would hold me back, as a built in excuse for failure. Idk. I’m also 28 and I worry about whether it would serve me in any way to know if I was or just ultimately hold me back and maybe even make me sad. Like you, despite all of this I’ve had a few GFs but I’ve been pretty disconnected with all people in my life.
My high school had a psychologist/therapist who we could see freely. After years of talking with me and observing me on campus, he called my mom up and told her that he strongly suspected I had autism, and that she should have me go through the official process so I could get a diagnosis. My mom refused because she didn't want me to have that label.
I believe that psychologist was right and that I do indeed have autism; I've long felt I had the symptoms. Just like you I have an above-average IQ (tested while getting a prescription for Ritalin) which has allowed me to skirt by in life.
>so I could still catch and emulate patterns even if I don't actually feel or understand why I'm supposed to act a certain way.
This is exactly how I have gotten by. I used to be incredibly socially awkward to the point that I was afraid to talk. Thankfully I learned to emulate people around me and it worked, I started to improve socially. This caused my confidence to improve which in turn reduced my anxiety and made me even more normal. Eventually I got to the point that I could sit next to random women in class and strike up conversations and befriend them - by senior year I was walking around campus with up to 5 women with me and people would notice, they were actually nicer to me and treated me well. I also for the first time got to experience being wanted by women, which is such an incredible ego boost.
Post college though I ended up working remote, and during Covid the 2 years of no social contact completely destroyed my social skills. I am now back to square one; completely awkward and having trouble making eye contact.
What great heights I reached, and how far I've fallen. At least I know what is possible though. I am struggling to reach those prior heights but I have to, because I've been single for 3 years now. I worry if I don't regain my social skills I might hit 40 and still not have a wife. That scares me... I don't want to die alone anon
No, I am used to having a normal arousal levels, it’s just the past couple of week have been way more than normal. Like, after I finish I am fully hard less than 10 minutes later and not being able to calm it down no matter how hard I try
>GF bought an elliptical machine 3 months ago for $250 >still in the box and she hasn't even made an attempt to set it up.
I love this woman but she is very fat and I can already see that any fricking attempt to change her lifestyle is just not going to work, not sure what to do.
Whiskey.
I've been struggling immensely the past few months. My sister and nephew were killed in an car "accident. Some guy wanted to kill himself. Went out, got drunk, and got into his car and flew down a straight ass highway as fast as he could and plowed into them. He survived, went to the hospital, was able to go check himself out of the hospital, and went home and blew his brains out.
I was super close to both of them, and they were just at my house a week prior for my daughters birthday party. They were just deleted out of my life.
We put up our Christmas decorations today, and my daughter was so excited, and I could just think that I'll never have another Christmas with them. I kept thinking about how my parents lost both their daughter, and their grandson. Like if I lost my daughter, and her child. I haven't told a lot of people around me just because I honestly feel guilty about telling them. It's just so fricking terrible, and I know there's nothing they can say that'll make me feel better, so I'm literally just poisoning a social interaction. Making them feel bad about the circumstance, and then having pity on me. I'd rather just avoid it.
I'm sorry anon. That's the kind of thing only time can heal.
If you feel like shit just get a load of me and you'll feel a whole lot better about your life: >move to new city to live with gf >2 months in she says this isn't gonna work >she gives me 2 days to move out >new flat is too far from work (no other choices, housing crisis) >pay the first month and the deposit, all my money gone >have to quit job and find new one >no one will hire me >finally get an interview >"we'd like to offer you the job" >keep it calm and collected and just say ok >ask them if this is official, they say yes and send me the contract >2 days later they call me and say "we couldn't get in touch with your previous employer, the answer is no from us" >ask them why did they offer me the job in the first place if they hadn't called my prev employer >"apologies, a matter of miscomunication between hr agents" >i had already e-mailed all the other recruiters that I got a job so they can cancel me out >20$ in bank account >rent is due in 4 days >gonna live on the street >no car >can't go back home because i've no money for a plane ticket >wont have the luxury of "finding a solution" as i wont have normal access to wifi or electricity >it's -5 degrees
it is what it is aye
Go to the library and use their internet. Or see if they'll give you a job.
I want a girlfriend. I've seen people on IST wish their cultures did arranged marriage, but trust me it is very frustrating to sit and twiddle my thumbs until my parents finally start looking for someone.
Careful. Relationships can be wonderful but they can also ruin your life. See
If you feel like shit just get a load of me and you'll feel a whole lot better about your life: >move to new city to live with gf >2 months in she says this isn't gonna work >she gives me 2 days to move out >new flat is too far from work (no other choices, housing crisis) >pay the first month and the deposit, all my money gone >have to quit job and find new one >no one will hire me >finally get an interview >"we'd like to offer you the job" >keep it calm and collected and just say ok >ask them if this is official, they say yes and send me the contract >2 days later they call me and say "we couldn't get in touch with your previous employer, the answer is no from us" >ask them why did they offer me the job in the first place if they hadn't called my prev employer >"apologies, a matter of miscomunication between hr agents" >i had already e-mailed all the other recruiters that I got a job so they can cancel me out >20$ in bank account >rent is due in 4 days >gonna live on the street >no car >can't go back home because i've no money for a plane ticket >wont have the luxury of "finding a solution" as i wont have normal access to wifi or electricity >it's -5 degrees
I’m sorry, anon. Find peace knowing it was painless and be grateful for the time you had with them. Never forget it. Let it keep you sharp and hungry to never take life for granted. You will find peace
My cousin died 9 years ago, right around this time of year. Whenever it's thanksgiving I think about it. He was the same age as me, super outgoing, extremely well-liked and popular, smart, going into science. He was a good kid. He and another were killed by a drugged-up driver.
I feel like he was always destined for great things, and he was always so kind to me even though he could just treat me like the loser I (rightfully) was. I kind of feel like I owe it to him to try harder in life, for his sake. Seeing his folks deteriorate year after year is so rough. I miss him.
Just give me something rum-based, barkeep. I don't care what.
I have been on the path to self-improvement for the past nine months now. I have been working out, trying to improve my diet, and generally doing what I can to make my life better for the sake of my wife and daughter. I started this journey for them because I love them, and I want my daughter growing up with healthy life habits, while I want my wife to follow my example for our little girl as well. Nine fricking months. And you know what? My wife has gotten WORSE. I know the path of self-improvement is a long haul, but jesus christ she is unable to do the most basic shit for herself. She is lazy and unmotivated to do anything for our house or family, unless it involves spending my money, and everything you'd expect a stay at home wife to do (like cooking or cleaning), she instead foists on me to do when I return home from work. And on the rare days she is actually willing to do something productive, well boy howdy wouldn't you know she suddenly gets a headache or a stomachache or some other moronic excuse to lay in bed and waste her days watching YouTube videos. I love her, but I am absolutely fricking sick and tired of her weakness. I'm tired of her being a pathetic waste of space that seems to exist just to do nothing until she dies. I have no idea how to tell her to shape the frick up, but I know I need to, because her behavior is unacceptable for our daughter.
Tell her l, anon. Tell her just like you said it here. Let it sting. Then tell her if she doesn’t shape up that you will leave. Stick to your word. You will either save your marriage or you will get out of it while you still have time to start a new life with someone else.
I'm so bad at socializing I get depressed whenever I talk to someone. I know the solution is >just practice talking
but how can I do that when I get pain and self hate every single time?
If you feel like shit just get a load of me and you'll feel a whole lot better about your life: >move to new city to live with gf >2 months in she says this isn't gonna work >she gives me 2 days to move out >new flat is too far from work (no other choices, housing crisis) >pay the first month and the deposit, all my money gone >have to quit job and find new one >no one will hire me >finally get an interview >"we'd like to offer you the job" >keep it calm and collected and just say ok >ask them if this is official, they say yes and send me the contract >2 days later they call me and say "we couldn't get in touch with your previous employer, the answer is no from us" >ask them why did they offer me the job in the first place if they hadn't called my prev employer >"apologies, a matter of miscomunication between hr agents" >i had already e-mailed all the other recruiters that I got a job so they can cancel me out >20$ in bank account >rent is due in 4 days >gonna live on the street >no car >can't go back home because i've no money for a plane ticket >wont have the luxury of "finding a solution" as i wont have normal access to wifi or electricity >it's -5 degrees
also >going out of your way telling other potential options to no longer consider you before having a signed contract in hand
prognosis: not going to make it
I laugh at these little autistic homosexuals on these threads and the fact that they're trying to better themselves just makes me laugh even more. If you're a little autistic gay it doesn't matter how much lifting you do. You'll always be a little autistic gay.
I want a girlfriend. I've seen people on IST wish their cultures did arranged marriage, but trust me it is very frustrating to sit and twiddle my thumbs until my parents finally start looking for someone.
My advice is for you to practice no nut and stoicism. You yearn for something that only exists in your imagination. The "girlfriend" you envision is an abstract concept, real women are far different, more ruthless, vile, emotionless and cunning. Disappointment is imminent even if you enter a relationship. Not telling you to die alone. A real woman will come to you naturally once you've unlocked true masculinity and stability. It starts from no nut and stoicism.
>forced to be off work wednesday through friday for the holiday (used paid time off to cover it) >decline to go to family thanksgiving to not be a loser around family >spend holiday alone >literally haven't stepped foot out of the house since Wednesday morning >completely and utterly waste 4 days of my life with nothing to show for them, don't even remember what I did
my life is the most humiliating and pathetic of anyone on this board
why dont you go for a little walk around the block or something? doesn't have to be anything crazy, just get your legs moving. you'll feel a little bit better. maybe up it to a few times around the block if you are feelings up to it.
It's okay to feel like shit, but don't let yourself wallow.
A lady friend suggested we go for a walk for our second date, she flaked on me because her neice babysitting duties were unexpectedly extended. Asked to reschedule, but no apology.
We also had to reschedule our first date, but she did apologise that time. We had a great first date.
I don't want to overthink what just happened, but maybe she's just not interested and I shouldn't waste my time. On the plus side: I didn't get ghosted. This is all confusing and I'm probably overthinking the circumstances... human relations are confounding.
The strongest chocolate milk you have.
Reposting from other thread: >cold approach this girl I like >have a semi-awkward conversation about literature and books we read when we were young >have to leave in the middle of convo >2 months later we haven't talked once >no natural ways to start a conversation
How do I talk to this women without coming off as an autist? Should I wait for a chance or just approach her again out of nowhere? I've never done this sort of thing before
Need more info. Did she leave in the middle of the conversation? Where do you run into her? At the very least, I'd say flat-out ask her out. Make sure you're dressed nicely, groomed, etc. It'll be less creepy, for sure.
>>cold approach this girl I like
2 months is enough time to prove you are not a simp, she prob thought you were bored and wanted to chat don't over think it, that's her job. Just aproach her and ask her about black friday or whatever moronation normies like to chat over, if the talk isn't akward just ask her if she wants to hang out sometime.
Question for the two or three heterosexual fitizens at the bar.
If you were trapped In a saw like dead game, and the test was about making a guy cum, and your ONLY two choices are either blow him or use your butthole..
butthole of course. You will face the other way and pretend you are making a nasty shit. You can be passive.
With mouth you have to be active and even if you close your eyes you will feel everything 100x with things your butthole doesn't have: taste, smell, etc.
Anyone choosing mouth is a gay homosexual homosexual who secretly enjoys it.
>have minor/borderline mild scoliosis since teenage years >enjoyed boxing, muay thai, and hiking a lot >do stretches and exercises to keep my posture up >now late 20s >curve suddenly rapidly progressing because of disc degeneration >if they do the surgery, I can't do contact sports ever again or even throw a proper punch >can't go on multiday hiking trip too. Heavy load might blow my back out >not to mention the failure rate alone scares me something fierce
I started out as a skinny 90 pound girl. i wanted to get hot and muscular so i started on a program and noticed some hardcore noob gains. I'm up 15 pounds and i look fricking hot. i'm finally developing muscles i can be proud of. I feel great about myself and my progress, but my boyfriend who is skinny and eats like two small meals a day doesn't want to go to the gym with me. he just straight up doesn't want to put in the effort. it's fricking gay because he is already hot and tall. he has so much potential to be a pure chad but it's just too hard for him and he always gives up.
i'm busting my ass, hitting PRs, going to the gym at 6 in the morning, and I have nobody to share that shit with. he will never be there to see me hit any PRs. he just wants to sit at home and play fricking hearts of iron and complain to me about how insecure he is about his skinny torso. frick b***h just eat more and come to the gym with me. does he know how lucky he is to have a fit gym gf? i see other couples at the gym pushing each other and progressing together and i seethe honestly. i wish i had that. still love him but he's so gay sometimes
the dream, a gf and playing hoi4, very based, tho with the effort thing I doubt you can get him to go unless you push it hard and gradually work up. He'd have to want to go himself but since thats not the case good luck.
Downloaded the fricking dating apps again. Wasted my Saturday and got pics of breasts and asses. Both women who sent the pics split. I think my problem is that I don't wanna go to a date, just frick, but at the same time am very cautious towards the kind of women that would frick a complete stranger. There's also the fact that my life is a complete mess and the chase after meaningless sex distracts me but that's just details.
I dunno if I'm gonna make it brahs.
They get horny, send shit and then ghost. That's common as frick. I remember one who was particularly hot and dtf a couple months back. We started sexting and she wanted to show me her pussy. I told her I would prefer if she didn't and we fricked than if she did and then regretted it and ghosted me. She sent the pics, jerk offd, then promptly got post coom clarity and ghosted me.
I unironicanilly encourage anons to avoid getting nudes from tinder hoes before you see each other since 9 outta 10 times it makes them get cold feet.
Same boat Anon! Just remember to play opposites, everything you do has got to be the opposite to get the outcome you want. The nudes are a shit test kek, you have to seem unphased like you have 20 other girls sending you the same.
If you want quick easy sex, set up dates close to home with an excuse pre-existing to get them back to your place so that it "just happened" when they tell their friends. Dogs, playing guitar, even forgotten wallet and skip the date will work. They just cant feel like they are coming over for sex.
As foreign as this will all feel, all you be doing is making her head spin as to why you haven't came onto her already making her invest more into you. This is all a mind game. Keep winning player
Pay whale tax. Issue is the system is flawed for consumer. More apps = fraction of dating pool = less chance of theoretically impression of a female. Which is great for the company because thirsty males will pay a premium.
6 months ago
Anonymous
https://i.imgur.com/oGGQQRz.jpg
>try out dating apps >get 0 matches for a week
haha
Set your profile to be interested in men and women. Don’t swipe on men, only women. But this will cause homosexuals to swipe on you, which gives attention to your profile and boosts it’s visibility to women. It makes your profile seem more desirable because the app doesn’t know it’s mostly men, and if you do this before it gets patched you should be able to have a profile constantly being boosted by women at a certain point so it won’t matter
6 months ago
Anonymous
I got a 30 minute boost for free on one app that pushes your visibility up to max and only got 2 likes in total.
6 months ago
Anonymous
Cool so imagine if you try my method and have that boost 24/7. 2 matches every half hour for a man is actually very good. Most guys get 2 matches a month assuming they consistently swipe and have a maxed out profile
6 months ago
Anonymous
Your method sounds good, but I'm talking about likes, not matches. The likes I get are either from fatties or pajeets that live in a different country.
I'll probably have to find a way to get decent photos first before I can try random shit to game the algorithm
I downloaded tinder after a few months off and have just been getting hit with fatties all night. I don't get why sometimes the algorithm hooks me up and sometimes it just decides to give me shit.
I've been sick all week. It's fricking up my work out plans. This winter I was gonna do the greatest bulk of all time, but I won't be able to do that if I keep getting sick.
Are dating apps worth trying if I’m a KHV? I’m starting to finally get in shape (got decent muscle but still some fat to lose before it really shows) and I want a gf really bad.
I'm coming back home from a wonderful weekend with a wonderful girl who is really into me. On the other hand, after so many dates I still can't feel anything for her because I'm obsessed with a coworker who rejected me multiple times.
I'd like to say I'm not talking to this coworker and time will fix it, but we are together all the time at work and she actively calls me for coffees and lunch, and I should tell her to frick off but when she smiles at me I just can't ghost her.
Oh and lately I haven't been lifting shit because I'm always on business trips and I take 12h flights and I'm tired all the time, can't even do some pushups in my hotel room.
I went to buy dog food for my parents dog. Went to the pet store near them, find bag of IAMs and pick up 40lb bag with one hand, take it to the counter. Young girl (high school most likely) working behind the counter. She starts talking about IAMs, says it is not good for dogs and makes them fat/enlarges their hearts. Says people usually don't want to hear about it, ask her to continue. She spergs out and talks a lot about dog food and what is in it. Shows me a brand she would recommend. Black Friday sale, so I get a small bag of it as well. She seems so happy that someone listened to her. Pay for dog food. Goes to grab the bags of dog food. She stops me and tells me to take the small bag of recommended food and she grabs the big bag of IAMs. Literally this bag is like half her size lol. She took it to my car. Tell her thank you, she said something idk what and runs in. That is the first human interaction I have had with someone out of my immediate family that went beyond surface level in the past 6 months. It felt really nice. She seems like a nice kid and I hope I made her day better too by listening to her rant about dog food.
How do I stop obsessing about women?
I've met many which I thought were great throughout my life, but every time I start thinking "She's the only one/best one I'll ever meet, I need to be with her", fully forgetting that I felt this way before and I will feel it again with someone else if it doesn't work out.
I want to engage in foreskin restoration because of the mental anguish being circumcised causes me plus to restore the physical functions for the benefit of myself and my future wife should God will that I get married. However, I feel the need to refrain from doing so because I don't want to be tempted to "test out" what has been restored and fall into grave sins. Yet the mental torment and physical discomfort it causes me continues despite refraining. One could say wait but it’s a lengthy process to restore regardless and I’m sick of the aforementioned pain. God help me.
Just realized it's all pointless, lifting, working, self improving, going out with friends, everything. You will never make it and you will never live the life you thought you would live.
The younger generations are realizing early how fricked they are compared to the older gens.
Things weren't like this ten years ago, but they are now and they will only get worse.
with that doomer mindset yeah, your right, but what are you going to do about it? So waste away and die? At least do shit you wanna do before you perish. What do you have to lose?
I came to the same conclusion yesterday as well while browsing in one of those /gif threads, watching a video of a troony suck his own wiener and cum inside his own mouth for money. The modern world has opened up an abyss that is both horrific and always expanding, and It's malefic fumes so easily spread around the entire earth. There's no going back, and the future is a precipice.
I came to the same conclusion yesterday as well while browsing in one of those /gif threads, watching a video of a troony suck his own wiener and cum inside his own mouth for money. The modern world has opened up an abyss that is both horrific and always expanding, and It's malefic fumes so easily spread around the entire earth. There's no going back, and the future is a precipice.
I’ve realized it too. 10 years ago things were just starting down this path. I remember 20 years ago when I was in first grade at my school for a Halloween event there were kids fathers dressed in drag. Just obviously men with dresses and wigs on. It was funny. It wasn’t seen as degenerate. There was no one to be offended by it. Now there’s actually dudes who do that shit who would take offense, and there’s so many perverts that some child’s father doing that for laughs would be called a a sicko with other intentions because that’s just a very real thing right now with these trannies.
It’s not even just trannies >Black folk who grew up upper middleclass in gated communities, whose parents bought them current year cameros and mustangs, b***h and Moab about how oppressed they are despite job applications quite literally saying “not for white people don’t waste our time this role is only for minority POC”, to say very little about that branch of buffoonery we have today >white men unironically being the most oppressed group right now, except we don’t b***h and cry about that shit so it goes unnoticed and continues to be accepted >society growing more and more degenerate, every once great country is accepting and giving housing and aid to illegal immigrants (who often openly hate those same countries and the people who belong there) while neglecting their own citizens
It’s all just a downward spiral.
I’m not even a doomer, I’m still pushing to make my dreams happen. But this shit is undeniable. It’s going to take a great reset. Shit will one day hit the fan. All I want is to buy like 100 acres and frick off away from this bullshit. I could be pretty happy on just 20-50 acres though.
men unironically being the most oppressed group right now, except we don’t b***h and cry about that shit
literally all you are doing in that pst is rambling btiching and crying. trannies, Black folk, illegal immigrants, fake victim complexing. surprised you didnt tlak about the israelites as well
you should buy 50 acres and go somewhere where no one has to interact with you or your autistic schizophrenic rambling.
He’s right and you proved his point >single mention of something = b***hing and crying >a single mention of something which doesn’t benefit you and you SEETHE
Uh oh is J’qrayron mad? Is the big baby man gonna.. CRY? Get fricked you section 8 aidsy nig/ scrawny 5’3” israelite, whichever you are (no major difference)
Blog update:
Ex thought she could downgrade me to fricking the bag indefinitely after four years worth of balls deep creampies.
Spoiler alert: she was wrong
she thought i was cheating on her due to a slightly drunken night with a female friend that predates me knowing her
not too problematic, alcohol can lead to ugly outcomes
the problem was after that, she did absolutely nothing to fix the relationship, i went far beyond anything reasonable to prove to her that i had no intention of cheating and that i didn't cheat on her
if i ever have a real problem with her while married it will be game over for me
>15 years of lifting off and on >one day tear rotator cuff >never heals right
That's its for me. I always thought i'd be extra resilient in my late 30's/early 40's because of all my years of lifting, but no. all it took was not warming up enough and 125lbs bench to snap my shit up. now i'm worse off than most other men my age.
Idk if this is autism or I’m just hypersensitive to stuff but I fricking hate noise. I absolutely fricking hate certain sounds like styrofoam rubbing together or cardboard boxes being ripped, I hate hearing tape being pulled and cut.
It quite literally makes me go from relaxed normal to full alert and panicky. It overwhelms me, it send my heart rate to 120bpm. I hate certain noises so much.
I hate these sounds, I hate others too like when something occurs and some stupid b***h c**t thinks shrieking at the top of her lungs from the sidelines will help the situation in anyway. I hate when children scream in the same manor, often because they learned it form their mom. It makes me want to walk over and bakc hand the teeth out of someone’s mouth when that’s all they can do. Like you stupid fricking silly b***h, if you’re not helping the situation shut your fricking mouth. In what way, especially when other people are stepping in/already handling it, do you think standing there mouth agape and shrieking like a fricking lunatic will help? Are you that fricking helpless? Does it occur to you that if this is all you could do you would die in day one of shit hitting the fan? The most annoying part is that sometimes you’ll get to observe a “shreiker” quietly watch the situation, observe, and consciously decide “yeah, I better send out a top of my lungs glass shattering ear drum raping screech. That is what this situation needs, that will help the people already dealing with the situation focus harder”
I just hate loud sounds. Idk if it’s maybe my caffeine consumption putting me at an already heightened state easily pushed to the edge, or if I’m autistic or what. I don’t think I was always this sensitive to noises though, it seems to just get worse each year and I’m less and less patient to them. Too many noises and then I spend the day all fricking anxious and in a foul mood too paralyzed to focus on what I have to accomplish for the day. I hate it.
I am easily annoyed after I bust too many nuts to goyporn. Maybe thats it?
https://i.imgur.com/USPJWV0.jpg
I live in small city of 18000 people which is 40km away from big city. When i check Tinder - most of girls are 20/30/40km away from me. So i suspect its not only quality of my pictures or how boring i am - most of girls my age simply does not see me at all because their filters are set to 10/20km away. So i barely get any matches when i get some, even with chubby girls, conversation dies out after few messages (maybe because i put too much effort in it and i talk about hobbies and ask her questions like a beta cuck instead of asking her for irl date right away - which i dont have motivation to do because she is again far away and i need to have good reason to drive 40km like person being really pretty and interesting) >inb4 just move to big city
Right now there is inflation and big housing crisis in my country. I would probably need to spend >1/3 of my wage on rent alone and i still earn above average (which soon will be less and less impressive, maybe barely enough to survive given crazy inflation and generaly sorry state of the world). It simply does not make sense to move from purely economical perspective. I also got blackpilled from reading incel forums etc reading that chads get approached all the time and i was last year at hollidays in party cities or at some raves and no girls approached me, or their signs were too subtle. So i stopped believing that changing my location will change much in my life. But i guess chances woul be >0% if i moved out
Tinder doesnt work for most guys it's not even their fault. You would have more chance finding women irl by pursuing activities that keeps new people coming into your circle. Anything.
You could be right, thinking about it basically all the problems I have gradually started to occur after I developed a porn and masturbation addiction. I mean busting 3-5 nuts is a slow day for me.
There’s also the fact that at the same time I developed nicotine and caffeine addictions as well, using way too much. I’ve been living in excess of these three things and all areas of my life have fallen to shit. I’ve been super on edge constantly. I think that I’ve known for a while I have to quit these to return back to my former, normal, self.
Im in the same boat anon, i get unbeareably angry and sometimes i even get to the brink of crying, for me sudden loud sounds are the worst (like dog barks or someone honking their car horn).
I usually just close my eyes and breathe really deep and count slowly until i calm down, cause i know its moronic to get so worked up over it
I also know it’s stupid to get so worked up over something beyond my control, I generally do my best to keep it together and bottle up the anger and anxiety it causes me. But I wish I’d isn’t have this at all. There was a time I didn’t even react at all to noises even loud ones I never jumped or anything and at best got mildly annoyed, I want to be like that again.
I remember having a job next to the highway right off the exit where I had to frequently leave the building to do shit outside and people would heckle me. The heckling was one thing and often funny and in good nature, helped the day go by. But the amount of people who would honk to get my attention (also usually expecting me to run through traffic to come talk to them, I’m not doing that idgaf if we need the business). The honking was unbearable it always made me jump out of my skin. Occasionally I would be 5 feet from the road and a car would pull up right behind me and slam on their horn to get my attention when they only needed to crack the window and speak at a normal voice, I always told them to frick off I’m not offering them my business.
Then there were the nigs with subwoofers blasting whatever shitty song on max volume with the bass all the way up so that the song became distorted buzzing that shook all the surrounding buildings, I hated those people.
I don't know what the frick I am doing with my life. Have two job offers, one in Toronto and one in London. The London one pays $25k USD more and I already have friends that live there. If they were paying the same amount I would pick Toronto because I liked it when I visited and had much, much more success on the dating apps for some reason.
Still, the Toronto offer feels like its ripping me off and my quality of life will be a lot shittier. I'd be spending about 50% of my take home on rent vs 25%. Doesn't make sense to take it. I feel bad for Canadians, they seem to get shafted with salaries even worse than the Brits do
i went from a 5 to a 7.5 in about two years and just can’t fathom that attractive women are actually into me. i don’t feel worthy of these girls and am nervous as frick around them. went on a date with this solid 8 who asked me out and she was clearly nervous too. making her laugh was easy but i couldn’t hold eye contact for a second when she was smiling at me, just this constant feeling of her being out of my league. sucks man.
>never had a relationship, hugged, or kissed a woman at the age of 22 >extended family has quit asking me if I’m talking to any girls
I guess I’ll take some whiskey, please
Part of the reason I didn’t go see my extended family for any holidays this year or any of the last is I have nothing to share. >what have you been up to? How’s the firefighting?
I found out it wasn’t for me and I’m not someone who can be around sick/dying people a month on the job fricked me up and my courses didn’t prepare me to actually be the one in control of those patients it’s very different to be the student with 2 seasoned medics and a lieutenant VS actually being the lead medic. So I quit and I’ve been unemployed and neet since >hey anon, I know we’ve asked every year we’ve seen you and we react awkwardly to make you feel shitty when you always say no, as if to insinuate something is wrong with you, but got a girlfriend yet?
Actually I did finally get a gf. Guess how that went? The first was a mentally ill prostitute with a huge body count who would hit me and cut herself and tell people I was abusing her aren’t you proud? I spent 5 years celibate after that experience, finally dated again, and the new b***h out right threatened that she would cheat on me haha so whacky right? Haha I love that you can only ever fricking ask about this and never seem to understand I don’t want to discuss this shit with you people haha please ask next year! I’m sure the answer will be no again! Maybe you’ll use your classic wording of “why don’t you ever bring a girlfriend to our holidays?” I always love that >hey anon any hobbies!
Yeah I got a few! I have this super fun hobby where I sit in my room all day with the lights off switching between suicidal idealizations and edging for 6 hours straight. Sometimes I’ll play video games to escape reality. I’m so interesting haha…
I don’t got shit to share idk why they can only ask about the exact areas I’m fricking up in.
>see anon post about something that made him happy but no one itt knows/has pointed out it’s not exactly how he seems >go to reply because I had direct experience doing that, telling him I’m happy for but [insert know it all BS pointing out why it wasn’t anything crazy that’s standard] >decide to let him have this
I need to do better with this IRL. Keeping my mouth shut, not jumping on opportunities to be a know it all piece of shit. Part of the problem with why I’m like this is I spent a lot of my 20s with a friend who behaved like this except he was wrong every single time so I got into the habit of correcting him. The way he would do it was in a blatant “you’re dumb I’m right that means Im better than you are haha” kind of way, and he did it every chance he got often with subjects he knew nothing about. If anyone else pointed out critique or a correction, not even necessarily at him, and he was involved in the discussion he just had to jump in to basically say something to the effect of >nah uh I actually went to college and I read that XYZ ABC and so you’re wrong
Or, if you did it to him he would stare at you like you were being the biggest butthole on the planet. Not even in the way he did it to everyone, just a simple “hey bro that’s actually my area of expertise it’s actually [ABC] it’s super interesting” like he just wanted to be the constant center of attention
Dude didn’t even fricking go to college like he says to leverage things he dropped out during the withdrawal period of his first semester because he couldn’t handle psych 101, computer literacy, and English 1101 at our local community college. The heaviest work load was literally the English course which included 4 essays in the entire semester. The dude was a dick and hanging with him made me become a dick too, I guess as a form of comparativeness towards him being this way. Ive been making an effort to fix myself while also trying to hang more around better people.
One of the biggest benefits of being too damn smart is leveraging it to talk to girls about everything. I can talk to nurses about medical stuff and hold my own, paras/lawyers about lawyer bullshit, other teachers/parents about kids etc. Still can't avoid getting love bombed and slaughtered. My tendency to prefer girls who like a struggle with a snuggle has a huge crossover with mental illness
I live in small city of 18000 people which is 40km away from big city. When i check Tinder - most of girls are 20/30/40km away from me. So i suspect its not only quality of my pictures or how boring i am - most of girls my age simply does not see me at all because their filters are set to 10/20km away. So i barely get any matches when i get some, even with chubby girls, conversation dies out after few messages (maybe because i put too much effort in it and i talk about hobbies and ask her questions like a beta cuck instead of asking her for irl date right away - which i dont have motivation to do because she is again far away and i need to have good reason to drive 40km like person being really pretty and interesting) >inb4 just move to big city
Right now there is inflation and big housing crisis in my country. I would probably need to spend >1/3 of my wage on rent alone and i still earn above average (which soon will be less and less impressive, maybe barely enough to survive given crazy inflation and generaly sorry state of the world). It simply does not make sense to move from purely economical perspective. I also got blackpilled from reading incel forums etc reading that chads get approached all the time and i was last year at hollidays in party cities or at some raves and no girls approached me, or their signs were too subtle. So i stopped believing that changing my location will change much in my life. But i guess chances woul be >0% if i moved out
>oh no 1/3rd income on rent
In my area 1/2th income going to rent is normal. It’s bad. Tinder still doesn’t work, only if you have your own place. Even then they’re all prostitutes anyways. At best is some 5/10 who still wants a proper date (lol, lmao even). For the most part the only actual options I get are fat girls with cute faces who if they lost the weight they’d be frickable, so just dick suck girls.
I think your mistake is obvious to you. As you said >trying to give a shit about who they are, wanting to find an actual girlfriend
It’s tinder. Not only is that not what they’re there for, none of them are GF material. They’re prostitutes dude. You also gotta realize even with the ugliest b***hes there you’re competing with thousands of dudes at a time. A girl you meet IRL, you may be competing with 10-20 dudes. On tinder, it’s thousands.
It’s a degenerate app full of degenerate people. It’s not what you’re looking for. If you did get a GF through tinder congrats she’s been with 50+ dudes this year already.
The way tinder works is it’s a numbers game. You have to constantly be chatting up multiple women at a time trying to get hangouts immediately and take it off tinder right away until one works.
Other dating apps are no different.
You’re better off using your free time to socialize. Join clubs, join meet up groups. Continually do that shit and make your only goals to be to have fun and to network. Don’t even worry about meeting women. Network with everyone. Eventually you’ll meet a woman either in one of those groups or via someone you networked with.
Bro frick the dating apps especially in your circumstances. Just play the 3 second game, when ever you see a good looking woman just go and talk to her with in three seconds. Within 3 months it will become natural and you will go up to them with rizz up your sleeve.
I’ve found Christ for myself but feel unworthy. I have been doing bad at Uni, I haven’t been at the gym for months and I always relapse with masturbation.
I have to build gods kingdom but it’s so hard to stay focused clear minded and ambitious.
I need to motivate myself and keep my word bros, but it’s so hard
>I’ve found Christ for myself but feel unworthy
We all are. If St Paul says he's the chief of sinners, what does that say about me? Just trust in the Lord and cling to Him as much as you can. Self abuse and pornography is one of the greatest challenges young men have to fight against these days. Stay bold in your struggle and ask Christ for help and He will give it abundantly.
Bros how do I know if I can afford living on my own? Does it look like my budget is missing anything? >rent >gas (transportation) >car ins >phone bill & internet >electricity & water >food >misc (shampoo, paper towels, toilet paper etc) >health ins
I feel like I’m missing stuff. If I have over $20k saved and am saving a bit each month while paying all of these would you say I’m ready? I can’t even fricking jack off in my house while living at home I get no peace and quiet no privacy. Can’t bring b***hes over to get my dick sucked, which also means can’t really date, can’t bust a nut either on my own it’s been 3 fricking weeks I need to cum I’m about to drive to a rest stop on the highway and beat off in my car. I’m approaching 30 and I can’t even jack off.
Forgot to mention, parents are always home. I quite literally get zero time to be alone and by myself between work and being at home. I don’t just need that to beat off, I can’t truly destress and get my bearings together unless I have at least an hour all alone inside my house which rarely happens. I feel like I’m on eggshells around my own family just normally which doesn’t help this.
Can't help on your previous post but same anon. My mom is Bipolar, on meds but still doesn't 100% treat it so have to walk on eggshells around her. I've just resorted to barely speaking with her which is working well enough. But I desperately need some space without her around to destress, I WFH which doesn't help. Not easy living like this
It sucks dude. Work isn’t even part of it, like if I work and I’m around people for 8-12 hours, it’s just way worse by the time I’m home and still don’t get an empty house to just destress and reset. That actually makes me burn out basically right away, having zero alone time. I could always drive to an empty park or something and lay down in my car but it’s not even 1/4th the same effective as having a house to myself even just for an hour and it’s ridiculous to have to do that to continue to function.
Yesterday I did get the house to myself for a few hours. Within the first hour I felt great again, the rest of the time I was without even thinking to do it being productive. All shit I normally don’t get done until my parents are asleep. I meal prepped, did laundry, cleaned the kitchen did some dishes etc.
Idk why but being alone it’s just effortless for me to function normally I get shit done without having to make a list or thinking and forcing myself to do it. I’m more clear headed, focused, not stressed.
Living with parents it’s things that on paper seem like no big deal but when they happen multiple times a day nonstop it adds up fast. Shit like being questioned what I’m doing for ??? reason. Or my father wearing his shoes indoors and ever 5 minutes stomping down the hallway. Oddly enough the only time he isn’t being loud is when he takes his shoes off and sneaks up to my bedroom door and suddenly yells my full name >“ANON ANONYMOUS!” >what? >Oh, sorry I just didn’t know where you were
This happens daily, I’m always where I always am. My room. Sometimes he’ll bang on my door when he does it too.
My mom, she just goes into my room at random times and tears it apart. Idk what she’s looking for.
Im 28 btw, this is ridiculous. I have no privacy and I’m treated like a child still
100% the same on being seemingly inexplicably productive and way less stressed when the house is empty. Dishes are done, room is tidy, work is caught up on, and everything just feels 100x better. All of a sudden I have energy to socialize again too. Good to know it's not just me. I'm 24, not quite your age but also old enough to need that space. Hang in there anon. ik it's not easy
Don’t frick up like I did, keep working hard. You’ll be able to move out earlier than me. It’s gonna take me another 1-2 maybe even 3 years to leave.
Also the most ironic part of this to me, the most anxiety inducing part, is if I had my own place it would actually drive me to be closer with my family again.
my dad is bipolar, takes meds for it, and i still have to resort to barely speaking to him. people who didnt live with us dont know that he has really bad bipolar, and always thought we had a great family with no problems. i suppose they never saw him punching holes in the wall or threatening to shoot himself in front of me when i was really young. those things dont really bother me now, but i would never let him be alone with my kids when/if i have kids
The best part is to everyone outside the family, they seem completely normal, so no one in your community will ever really understand what you went through. Think you'll be able to forgive him? I'm still trying to decide if I even want to
Got it. That’s not a bad idea. I’ll take it a step further and have 12 months. Going to save a bit longer, run my numbers again and make sure I can also be growing what I have saved when I move out just for further reassurance.
well that's what they say, my actual advice is you'll find a way through whatever circumstances, you just have to bite the bullet
soon after I first moved out I squatted in my shitty rental for 2 months while it was renovated, showering at work, creating stupid videos on a laptop to pass the time without power or electricity, and I still look back on that time fondly
Forgot to mention, parents are always home. I quite literally get zero time to be alone and by myself between work and being at home. I don’t just need that to beat off, I can’t truly destress and get my bearings together unless I have at least an hour all alone inside my house which rarely happens. I feel like I’m on eggshells around my own family just normally which doesn’t help this.
Hook up with your dates at their place. Or airbnb.
Update on this b***h. So I arranged to see her today for just a few hours and she cancelled AGAIN siting her dog as the reason. I should just ignore her now until she makes some effort towards me right?
i don’t know the history but i would discard her at this point unless she’s coming over to my place. ball is in her court yeah don’t entertain her anymore, no texting or whatever. remember, if she really wanted to, she would. you’re the prize homie
>she cancelled AGAIN siting her dog as the reason
Was this before or after what's going on in the chat? Because she's clearly offering you multiple different chances to hang out AND showing consideration for your work schedule. You'd need terminal 'tism to frick this one up.
Drop her 100%. My guess is she has a very with one of her girls too see how many times she can frick you over before you ghost her. Women do this type shit basically every day. Literally delete her number and the conversation and don't text her every again
Looks like she's making an effort and us offering several times to reschedule. Maybe you should stop being a sociopathic narcissitic little homosexual and stop expecting people to bend down to you. What are you worth? What are you offering oh mighty god?
I could tell you but I don’t want my secret to become mainstream until I’ve been able to put into practice enough to find a worthwhile GF who I can marry.
Actually frick it it’s well known enough: conventions.
I can only enjoy a few anime. I hate reading manga usually too.
Most new animes that are the style I enjoy are basically just : naruto if he was in a magic user world.
Black clover, juihitsu Kaisen (which is simultaneously a demon slayer rip off), etc etc.
It wouldn’t hurt you to have some limited base knowledge of other animes (like the characters and general summary of the series) and only have a few you actually enjoy for the sake of the method I gave you. There’s also plenty of vidya cosplays if you’re into that, many Elden ring ones this year.
Beware though, cons are a crawling ground for Ethots too. Don’t date an Ethot one I met in college who I’ve watched spiral further down over the years is full blown onlyfans/foot porn (peeling bananas for some old fat guy to eat off her toes), and she just got into a 4 way relationship with 2 dudes and another woman. You should know pretty fast or easily if she’s an ethot though
I could tell you but I don’t want my secret to become mainstream until I’ve been able to put into practice enough to find a worthwhile GF who I can marry.
Actually frick it it’s well known enough: conventions.
Myhomie
where and how do i find a gf equally as autistic as me
To elaborate:
Go to a convention and observe everyone. You will notice how most men there are. Thats your competition. Obviously theres normal dudes but they’re a minority compared to the mostly fat morons. Simply being a non fat moron around fat moron neckbeards makes you look better. >don’t be in their face with physique
Autistic b***hes are still women and like an attractive guy, they can be more intimidated though. So dont be all chest puffed out and flexing, don’t cosplay as a character with fitness ties like goku. Be normal, but look good, just try to make it look effortless. >what to say
You have an easy in. Discuss their costume. Say you like it/it’s the best you’ve seen, ask them questions like how they made it what materials they used. Talk about the anime/manga/video game (common ground). If they’re feeling you, progress and get their number. Don’t talk for too long unless you two are legitimately vibing and truly enjoying talking to each other.
You can even be a bit of an autist and when you text her quote the anime/manga. She wont forget you if you were in costume and just mention who you were, or usually if she sa genuine autist she likely rarely gives her # out and will remember you you may not need to cosplay >how I realized this
I was at a con and overheard 3 fat neckbeard a trying to pick up some cosplay thots and they decided to, in gruesome vivid detail, discuss the berserk eclipse events, and as the women became obviously and visually uncomfortable they just kept going and going. I stepped in to change the subject and said “haha bro you like berserk? I love berserk! Whats your favorite arc?” And then left when they stopped talking about the rape scene. The girls stared, HARD and I was just in normal clothing. But that is what youre mostly up against, socially moronic fat frick slobs with zero game. The average ISTizen should be able to easily have easy pickings utilizing this info.
This
I had an autistic gf. That meant watching nothing but Supernatural and Torchwood on repeat all day every day, eating godawful food she'd make that was just pasta with random spices/powders she got from the local organic grocery store (I'm talking like turmeric, ashwaganda, and coffee onions spaghetti), and spending 2 hours every day rearranging the furniture in her room.
It was a true test in patience. I just want a girl who will watch Godzilla movies and go for walks with me.
This
I had an autistic gf. That meant watching nothing but Supernatural and Torchwood on repeat all day every day, eating godawful food she'd make that was just pasta with random spices/powders she got from the local organic grocery store (I'm talking like turmeric, ashwaganda, and coffee onions spaghetti), and spending 2 hours every day rearranging the furniture in her room.
It was a true test in patience. I just want a girl who will watch Godzilla movies and go for walks with me.
It's worse if they're aware of it. If they actively embrace the idea that they're autistic, they will use it as an excuse for all of their obnoxious behavior and refuse to do anything about it. And god help you if YOU have autism, because she will absolutely find your quirks and habits to be irritating and constantly yell at you for them.
This
I had an autistic gf. That meant watching nothing but Supernatural and Torchwood on repeat all day every day, eating godawful food she'd make that was just pasta with random spices/powders she got from the local organic grocery store (I'm talking like turmeric, ashwaganda, and coffee onions spaghetti), and spending 2 hours every day rearranging the furniture in her room.
It was a true test in patience. I just want a girl who will watch Godzilla movies and go for walks with me.
I saw a video today of two autists, they were about 16-18. Guy and girl. They were several autistic like non functional. The girl had on earphones to combat noise issues I guess, the guy would do autist shit with his hands like cover his mouth randomly. The guy got overly excited and started moaning/grunting along to the song that was playing.
But every couple seconds the guy would turn to the girl and they would touch noses and any time he looked at her she genuinely smile and look at him in… in such a fantastical way. Like she adored him. Both just as autistic. Genuinely seemed like love… and I will never experience that…
Edit found it, picrel if anyone wants to go watch it.
This
I had an autistic gf. That meant watching nothing but Supernatural and Torchwood on repeat all day every day, eating godawful food she'd make that was just pasta with random spices/powders she got from the local organic grocery store (I'm talking like turmeric, ashwaganda, and coffee onions spaghetti), and spending 2 hours every day rearranging the furniture in her room.
It was a true test in patience. I just want a girl who will watch Godzilla movies and go for walks with me.
there’s definitely a middle ground, not all autistic girls will be like you described. my ex was really into reading, photography, gaming and board games. also very shy and socially awkward, disliked clubbing and parties. they are out there, i promise
This
I had an autistic gf. That meant watching nothing but Supernatural and Torchwood on repeat all day every day, eating godawful food she'd make that was just pasta with random spices/powders she got from the local organic grocery store (I'm talking like turmeric, ashwaganda, and coffee onions spaghetti), and spending 2 hours every day rearranging the furniture in her room.
It was a true test in patience. I just want a girl who will watch Godzilla movies and go for walks with me.
[...]
It's worse if they're aware of it. If they actively embrace the idea that they're autistic, they will use it as an excuse for all of their obnoxious behavior and refuse to do anything about it. And god help you if YOU have autism, because she will absolutely find your quirks and habits to be irritating and constantly yell at you for them.
I can relate to these comments, my ex is autistic, like actually diagnosed as being on the spectrum in high school. She's really intelligent and works in tech making good money. She's also very sweet which is very important to me. As an additional bonus she's really naturally pretty and gifted genetically.
I thought I'd hit the lottery with her, but as time went on the shine wore off. She talks in this weird monotone voice with very little inflection, and her posture is very stiff just like her tone. She's really awkward and shy, which was cute at first, but it gets old fast. I would introduce her to friends or bring her out in social situations and she'd be so awkward that my friends would look at me like "wtf". They never made fun of her while we were dating but when I broke up with her they would mock her, maybe to make me feel better but still.
Oh yeah and she's completely naive and socially clueless. Since she had large perky breasts and was very fit, as well as being really pretty, she would get hit on all the time. The guys walking up to her randomly weren't usually a problem since she understood their intent, but the people in her social circles (she cosplayed and went to anime and video game cons) constantly hitting on her was exhausting since she genuinely thought they wanted to just be friends.
Got sick of constantly having to explain to her that no, Timmy from animecon isn't inviting you over to his house to just "help with his costume", he's trying to make a move on you. I think she genuinely never understood the subtext here. Eventually I realized it wasn't worth the stress. Not to mention I would imagine her at my wedding, when I introduce her to my family they would probably judge her for her weird mannerisms and then laugh at me behind my back.
I know that the right thing to do is to move on and focus on improving my life, but it eats at me that the people who hurt me will get away with it. I want them to suffer. It wouldn't fix anything but it would even the scales.
I've been divorced for 11 months. Every day is still so fricking difficult bros. I no longer have a purpose in life and if things don't start getting better I'll probably kms
I know there are people worse of than me who haven't killed themselves yet. What the frick is driving them day-to-day? What's keeping (You) alive anon?
Pure spite honestly. I don't want these buttholes to outlive me and I hate myself too much to give up struggling and sleep for the rest of time. However, I'd be lying if I said that there wasn't a small glimpse of hope inside of me that makes me think it might get better in the future.
>I know there are people worse of than me who haven't killed themselves yet. What the frick is driving them day-to-day? What's keeping (You) alive anon?
There's literally nothing keeping me alive besides my own fear of actually having to kill myself. I'm completely miserable, I've been so for 10-15 years. My life is so pathetic that people wouldn't even belive it if I wrote about it. No friends, no relationships, no career, barely any hobbies that I wouldn't miss if I was dead, barely a relatiosnhip with my family, no goals for a family, house, retirement, nothing.
Motorcycle, 105k a year job, being in my late twenties with a house. I wouldn't recommend a house alone though, 1800 sqft feels pretty lonely but whatever. Was in a fraternity during university and had lots of random sex but now I am looking for something real. Frick it all bro
Jack and Coke, thanks. Same shit different day bros. Depression is definitely hitting harder along with the growing sense of isolation and loneliness. I have no friends, no social life, no romantic options, but at least I have my gains right? I'm getting tired of college, work, and the gym. I'm just so tired bros, there's so much to do but so little time. I just want to be done with it all, I'm tired of feeling like this but it doesn't seem like it'll get better. I know my attitude isn't helping but it's getting more and more difficult to keep these thoughts at bay.
Tough love: life gets worse, not better, after college. Join some clubs and meet people. Even if you're a total sperg there's clubs that will accept you.
Thinking of cutting off family but unsure if it’s worth it. AGAINST: they’re quite wealthy and might provide me with 15-20k per year for the next two years to pay for my tuition. FOR: constant negativity, extremely poor advice. I see them 1-3 times per year and the only good times are the first 45 minutes of conversation.
Current strategy is to smile and nod and perform my minimum role so they pay my tuition until I’m done school. After that turn away for ever. I don’t think it’s worth sticking around for inheritance since both parents have said they’ll make sure there’s none left when they die, or if there is my mom will be putting it towards restoring a Scottish castle. I’m in the Midwest and they’re out east so it should be pretty easy to go my own way.
Dude you only see them a few times a year. I thought you were going to say you live with them still and wanted to just move out and cut them because they were abusive or something.
Man up. I don’t say that to be a dick, but man the frick up. You can put up with a few hours per year of being overwhelmed and annoyed for the sake of maintaining family relations and if they’re willing to help you pay tuition.
You sound spoiled dude, like a brat. And I’m saying that because I wouldn’t be trying to help you if I didn’t, this is what you need to hear whether you like it or not. There are anons with far worst gmail situations than yourself. Last weekend an anon posted about how his father started being verbally abusive to his former addict brother and drove him to relapse, tried to threaten anon, yet they’re fricked because they’re still stuck living there.
I live with my dad and I cannot stand it. I was basically neglected ages 8-20 by him while he prioritized his GF and her daughter form her previous marriage and starved my dog then gave it to the shelter to be put to sleep while I lived at my moms house. He didn’t even pay my mom child support. I still love him, he’s expressed regret on his own accord and has been trying to put in a conscious effort to make things right so we have some semblance of a relationship again. There’s shit I can never forgive, I can’t be in the same room as him beyond a minute without panic attacks but for fricks sake I’m grateful for the support I have now.
I tell you all this hoping you do better, not to guilt you or be a c**t. Maybe you left things out but form the context you sound spoiled and entitled and selfish. Families are annoying, suck it up.
Well I’d be inclined to ask you in this situation, how did you turn things around with your dad, and what has made that effort worthwhile? Also what would you advise me to do in this situation? It’s not as though I haven’t tried most things that I imagine you would suggest. Also you are correct- it is quite kind of them to provide me with money, and foolish of me not to grateful.
Would you advise to try to rectify this situation by attempting to Jordan Peterson the situation and discuss it in depth with them? Or just perform my duties as a member of the family to a mechanical minimum and leave it with that.
>how did you
Purely because he, all on his own, has expressed genuine and sincere guilt and regret and acknowledged how it probably fricked me up and made me the non normal person with the issues I have to still resolve that I am. I’m still not even comfortable around him. But because of that I can forgive.
Maybe it’s just me but accountability is a big deal for me. I have always put my best effort to take accountability for my actions, at times in the past to a fault (taking account anywhere I wasn’t in the wrong). No one, or rather so very few people are able to do this. It’s horse shit. Nothing makes me angrier and more untrusting towards someone than them not being able to take accountability and admit they fricked up all on their own.
I don’t think he even knows this about me and the fact he did this was a big deal to me. I’ve dumped women over them not being able to take accountability or own frick ups, or even acknowledge them.
But even then, things haven’t fully been made right. All I want to do now is finish improving and fix some of my issues, move out and show him I’m capable and will survive in this world. I’ve forgiven him, idk that we will ever be as close as we were when I was a child. But if I can at least get my shit most of the way tighter before he passes, that’s all I want. >would you advise
Idk. From what you posted idk that you have anything to rectify. Your family is obnoxious, that isn’t unique to you. I know it can suck but most families are annoying and even unbearable. You deal with it anyways because they love you. They’re all you have at the end of the day, even if at times they may seem selfish or weird in their choices. Don’t make yourself unhappy, but yeah at the very least to the minimum. It wouldn’t hurt to call your parents occasionally just to say hi and tell them how things have been, even about lifting if you want.
Well I’d be inclined to ask you in this situation, how did you turn things around with your dad, and what has made that effort worthwhile? Also what would you advise me to do in this situation? It’s not as though I haven’t tried most things that I imagine you would suggest. Also you are correct- it is quite kind of them to provide me with money, and foolish of me not to grateful.
Would you advise to try to rectify this situation by attempting to Jordan Peterson the situation and discuss it in depth with them? Or just perform my duties as a member of the family to a mechanical minimum and leave it with that.
Oh and I forgot to mention in my other post but I agree with this anon
>both parents have said they’ll make sure there’s none left when they die,
thats incredibly shitty on their part since there wont be any resources for the next generations, but i dont think you have enough reason to cut them off yet.
ill put in terms that will sound better to you. if you have kids, you can talk your parents into investing more of their money into you and your kids so they can see your family succeed. you getting married will make them change. ive never been in a relationship, but ive observed it happening with quite a few families.
that is shitty of them, frick a Scottish castle. But still, that is their choice and their money. Irresponsible and arguably immature/virtue signal-ish, flat out lame and gay if I may be so frank, but their choice. And yet I still don’t think it’s enough reason to cut them off especially if they’ve otherwise been good to you despite being annoying and offering bad advice. It is what it is, they’re family and they’re not abusive or shitty so you deal with them. That’s part of being a man
>both parents have said they’ll make sure there’s none left when they die,
thats incredibly shitty on their part since there wont be any resources for the next generations, but i dont think you have enough reason to cut them off yet.
ill put in terms that will sound better to you. if you have kids, you can talk your parents into investing more of their money into you and your kids so they can see your family succeed. you getting married will make them change. ive never been in a relationship, but ive observed it happening with quite a few families.
Man my parents treated me like shit and I still fly out to see them once a year.
You dont have to deal with them barely at all, cutting them off would just be an act of revenge that wont make you feel better. It sounds like youre in a fine spot, I don't let my parents pay for shit though because frick being reliant on those sociopaths. I'll go my own path and then show up to their house to read manga for a week every Christmas. I don't give a frick.
Just a couple days on dating apps and I already feel like a kazakh. I refuse to believe that the average woman was so lazy, crass and entitled during most of human existence.
I hope I get a job soon. Being out of work for like half a year is incredibly demoralizing. I can't do any of the shit I want to do because I don't have the cash to cushion the fall, and I want to save up for a house. I want a dog, I want kids, I want a new car, I want to just be able to relate to people going to events because they don't have to worry about budgeting.
I mean, I'll have to at some point if my unemployment runs out, but that's a last-ditch option for me. I was making 85k a year so I really don't want to halve my income if there's a better option
The main reason I'm out of work is because strikes shut my entire industry down and the job market dried up entirely. The strikes got resolved and I'm just waiting for production to get back underway.
Not really my industry, it'd be very difficult to transition to that. I doubt new drivers make that much and probably work hellish schedules, particularly in a big city like mine.
what they dont tell you is that you have to go work in one of their distribution centers before getting a chance at being a driver. good luck not getting let go during the weeks where they randomly decide they cant afford the extra people on staff because they randomly do that shit to the DC workers
Same shit except it’s been closer to 2 years. I’ve begun applying to
Why not do min wage work?
non wage retail jobs. I want anything, anything that gets me out of the house and back on a structured schedule of some sort while earning some type of income. I’m getting ready to just work 2-3 retail jobs all of 2024 if I have to.
My hope is that by filling the gap in employment it then becomes easier to get into a better job.
I want all the same shit as you man. I have a plan but it cannot start until I accomplish step 1 which is any job. >either land electric a helper/apprenticeship for electrician, OR get some retail jobs >first year working again israelite my way to having over $20k saved again >if I get into apprenticeship, save for another 6-12 months, move out once pay is better >if I have the free time get a dog, probably a breed that can be alone for 8 hours a day >by year 3 take a week off to take a small vacation (bringing my dog with me if I have one) >finsih up apprenticeship, upgrade to better apartment, hopefully have met a GF at this point and it gets serious enough she moves in, if no dog get dog now
And form there it should be easier and easier to accomplish the next goals like buying a house or leaving this state
damn man, sorry to hear that. Shit's rough. Just a minor note though, if you need a breed that's okay with being alone you probably shouldn't get a dog. Dogs are incredibly social and most don't do well alone. I'd wait until you can work from home or take your dog with you.
I know man, I plan to do all my research. I want to get one from a shelter so I likely won’t be able to just pick a breed. I do think most adult dogs would be chill for 8 hours, especially if I’m getting home at around 2pm. Plus I would spend all the time outside of work I had with it. But honestly it still doesn’t sound like a good idea to me. That’s why I included the possibility of just waiting until I had a GF who lived with me, assuming she didn’t work or she worked from home.
Oh well, when the time comes I either get one because I determine I can or I don’t.
I'm a high functioning agoraphobe. I still lift 6 times a week and I got to the office 3 times a week. but I have to take a lunchbox with icepacks with me wherever I go to calm me down if I start panicking. lately I've been great and never have to use them, but now its gotten to the point where I can't function normally without them as a security measure and I feel pathetic. I went to the gym today and I was in a great mood so I forgot to take them with me. and then I got there and realized I didn't have them and it felt like I was almost stranded. got back home without incident but I feel fricking pathetic bros. its like a big reminder that I'm not fricking normal and now I'm starting to wonder if I'll ever be normal again. just started 3 years ago after I had a medical incident and started being afraid of death
got a cute 19 year old girl writing with me and she’s actually crazy after me.
I’m much older than her also pretty hot but I don’t feel anything…
I think I’m dead inside it was the same in my last relationship. Woman do say I look attractive but damn I don’t feel anything .
Anyone here who has/had the same experience?
Any Tipps?
>tfw no gf >people tell me to do online dating >so autistic that I literally cannot form any sort of connection with somebody unless I have met them first >to me people online are just ghosts lost in the ether who I barely register as humans >might as well all just be bots shitposting on the net >no desire to meet any of these people because I have no pre-established connection with them >cannot make that connection online >doesn't stop people shouting "try online dating" like it's a fricking panacea or some shit
I will never understand people who say "dating is a numbers game, you've got to ask out thousands to even get one date and go on thousands of dates to get one relationship". That shit sounds exhausting and it also treats people as disposable and interchangeable which just feels so wrong. Doesn't stop them calling me a psychopath when I don't weep tears over every child BTFO in a warzone.
well yeah what do you expect? No one makes emotional connections via chat and very few of them come to real life meetups. that's why the first date is where you make the connection.
But I have no desire to go on a date with somebody I have no sort of emotional connection with, and such an emotional connection cannot be gained online.
To put it another way: the most attractive woman on Earth could walk into my room right now and ask me on a date, and I'd certainly respond with "no way gay". If she tried the same thing in two or three weeks after we'd had many in-person encounters, the answer would probably be different.
I'd much rather recreate the ending of Deus Ex where JC Dentreat destroys the entire internet.
The information revolution and its consequences have been a disaster for the human race.
Have you ever noticed how people who feel themselves stuck in hopeless situations have these grand delusions about doing unrealistic shit while completely neglecting the simple things they could do?
Basically, go take a shower homie.
I felt the same way but 1% effort is better than 0%, I may have no gf but now I can say it's my choice, I went on 3 of my first dates this year and I'm 29
I couldn't care less what they say about The Office or some other show but if you're bored just stop messaging them, you may come across another autist that brings up something you actually care about and then the conversation flows naturally >protip: screen for personality by matching for girls with unflatterring photos and no visible friends, they're your autists
>>so autistic that I literally cannot form any sort of connection with somebody unless I have met them first >to me people online are just ghosts lost in the ether who I barely register as humans >might as well all just be bots shitposting on the net >no desire to meet any of these people because I have no pre-established connection with them >cannot make that connection online >doesn't stop people shouting "try online dating" like it's a fricking panacea or some shit
I feel the same exact way. There’s zero desire to me to even try, and when I have forced it and tried it doesn’t work, likely because it’s not genuine. There’s like 20% of me that also views them all as stupid prostitutes essentially in a frick catalogue, because that’s what online dating essentially is. But other than that 20% same shit. I’m not even comfortable around a woman unless I’ve been acquainted in some way and seen her regularly on a consistent or semi consistent basis in some (preferably via mutual friends) setting. That’s how I’ve gotten the lays I have had.
Its so bad for me I have to rely on scumbag tactics to even get a GF and sleep with them first so I have comfort going on a date with them which as you can imagine often results in a shitty relationship. Thats something I think I can at least fix and stop doing, just full on sperg on a real date be anxious and uncomfortable and make a fool of myself struggling to look in her eyes stuttering as I tell her my couple stupid interests/hobbies which she isn’t going to relate to.
But as far as seeing a woman I match with on a dating app as real? That is not changing. Even if the stars aligned and I went on a date with one, date went well we started dating super compatible and make it official, Im not going to want to date her because she was on a dating app and I’ll never believe she wasn’t getting ran through. So no matter what just not human. I dont even want to date a girl I met IRL who at any point had one
Anyone have experience getting microneedling/laser treatment for old acne scars? In my looksmaxxing phase and wanting to clean up some of my more ghoulish features
Vodka and a diet coke.
I hate how self-negligent depression had made me. Trying to eat better and exercise again but progress is slow given that my bmi was lower than that of the average holocaust survivor. God I wish I hadn't wasted over a year rotting in bed
Do you want her to still be your gf? Then try therapy, and if nothing improves, just tell her that it didn't work and you don't want to spend money on it. If you don't care if she breaks up with you then refuse.
I want to believe that I'll some day feel normal human connection and experience something that resembles a normal human relationship, and what I have with her is the closest I've ever felt to that, so I'm interested in preserving it despite our issues. That being said, my mind seems made up about the entire field of psychiatry in general. I keep trying to convince myself that paying $70 once a week to rant to a stranger will help me be less hurt about things that happened in my childhood, knowing how ridiculous the idea sounds on its face
She thinks I'm "mentally unwell" and "not normal" (I'm not, but I don't see the issue, it works for me) but wants a passionate relationship regardless. I've tried to explain to her that I'm willing to try, and that's only because she's the first person I've felt an ounce of love for, but that I may simply be too weird and unfixable to be a good partner. She doesn't seem to understand my concern, she doesn't seem able to consider the possibility that therapy doesn't magically fix everything
Nothing is what I'd do about it
Care to extrapolate? I'm honestly here all day
Dump her, im unfixable frick these hoes trying to fix me.
Basically what's been rolling around my mind, but I want to consider all options
a therapist isn't a psychiatrist. A therapist doesn't diagnose anything wrong with your brain: it's just an outlet to vent. > she doesn't seem able to consider the possibility that therapy doesn't magically fix everything
From her perspective she probably thinks the same thing about you assuming therapy couldn't possibly work.
>A therapist doesn't diagnose anything wrong with your brain: it's just an outlet to vent.
That's the thing, though. I don't see how an outlet to vent would help me. I've never needed it before. I enjoy keeping things to myself and preserving my own little internal world. If I trusted psychiatrists and genuinely believed "mental illness" was a real thing, I'd just go straight to a psychiatrist and fix whatever is up there. I don't see my traits or behaviors as worth worrying about, nor do they affect others, but she seems to have an issue with the way I am because she wants me to "be normal"... I don't see why she wants to be with the more I think about it
>From her perspective she probably thinks the same thing about you assuming therapy couldn't possibly work.
I was shuffled between various therapists / psychiatrists from the age of 9 to 12. Those experiences soured my impression of the entire idea. If I'd bitten into 1,000 apples in my life and they tasted bad each time, you'd struggle to convince me that the apple 1,001 will actually taste totally fine bro. She's completely unwilling to accept even the slightest ideological criticism of psychiatry, she says it's "conspiratorial", as if it's not based off of my own life experience
have you told her your experience with them as a kid?
6 months ago
Anonymous
I have. She was understanding and felt bad that I'd had negative experiences with it, but when I explained what my situation was like at the time (socially inept autist preteen, shit home life, bullied at school) she attributed the negativity to my parents and school-age peers, not to therapy, even though the medical professionals blamed me for the issues and actively made my life worse at the time. She's not completely dismissive of how I feel, maybe I exaggerate, but her and I have very different approaches to mental health and I'm making concessions for her that I wouldn't normally make for anyone (my first appointment was last week, next one in two days)
Bad therapy creates internalized structures that prevent further therapy from working. You will now assume all therapy if of poor quality, and it will be nigh on impossible for people to convince you otherwise until you decide to put your faith into another person and open up again. So yeah,, therapy won't ever work with you. Something that can potentially work in spite of this is psychedelic use. If you are interested I can explain (in medical terms) how it affects the brain and why its got a novel and strong possibility to fix treatment resistant therapy cases.
Thank you for the perspective, I appreciate it
6 months ago
Anonymous
>the therapy wasn't shitty bro, your context was
Has your gf ever studied psychology or thought about becoming a therapist? That's a serious question btw. Women who are dogmatic about psychology usually have a narcissistic relationship with it.
6 months ago
Anonymous
Not from what I can tell. She had some sort of moderate "depression" phase in her teenage years and it got "cured" by a few therapy sessions (paid for by her extremely supportive normie family who are loaded) and she thinks she has ADHD now. I think she sort of worships therapy because of that.
She might have ADHD, I really have no opinion either way. I see people's traits and behaviors as simply an aspect of who they are, not symptoms of something supposedly wrong with them. She's messy and unorganized but I've never hounded her about it or told her that she's mentally ill and needs therapy to change herself. I accept that as part of who she is (at least, who she currently is) and as something I'm willing to tolerate if I want to live with her. I've never tried to make her change in the way she wants me to change. If her behavior came to be a dealbreaker for me, I wouldn't tell her that she needs to change to become what I want, I would just leave.
6 months ago
Anonymous
>I see people's traits and behaviors as simply an aspect of who they are, not symptoms of something supposedly wrong with them.
Pathologizing behaviors is all the rage nowadays. Anyway, it's clear that you expect her to treat you the way you treat her. You've to understand that she may be unwilling or even incapable of doing so. Going by your posts I would say that's the case but you're the one who knows her best. The real question is if that's a deal breaker to you or not.
Oh, if you do break up be prepared for her to rationalize that as you being unable to face your issues. Women love to project their faults externally and she'll never admit that her behavior is what made you call it quits.
Bad therapy creates internalized structures that prevent further therapy from working. You will now assume all therapy if of poor quality, and it will be nigh on impossible for people to convince you otherwise until you decide to put your faith into another person and open up again. So yeah,, therapy won't ever work with you. Something that can potentially work in spite of this is psychedelic use. If you are interested I can explain (in medical terms) how it affects the brain and why its got a novel and strong possibility to fix treatment resistant therapy cases.
6 months ago
Anonymous
>Something that can potentially work in spite of this is psychedelic use
you too can be the next connor murphy!
6 months ago
Anonymous
I'm not sure his issue but psychedelics are an extremely broad range of novel solutions. Psilocin is the strongest contender for treating poor thinking since it shuts off the "default mode network" which is quite literally the Freudian ego. It acts as the conductor that operates the machinery within your neural network. It keeps track of what connections need to be made at what time. This is where treatment resistant depression comes in. SSRIs can only "treat" mood but it doesn't solve the underlying infectious neural network that upregulates and boosts the shitty things crawling through our head. You get blasted on psilocin? That is the only part of the brain turned off, now you have true free will in the sense every part of your brain can speak to each other. Allowing you to make "new" connections and those effects are long lasting. Currently John Hopkins is trying to develope a talk therapy protocol to provide therapists with to use with patients in conjunction with psychedelic use.
6 months ago
Anonymous
Nta but is it wise to use shrooms continually, constantly even?
I have had like 4 trips. First three I took too much, also smoked weed with two of those which made it stronger. All became bad trips at one point, or I got very paranoid and anxious. The last one however I only took 1.5g and did not smoke weed and I had a realization : I need to learn to exercise a healthy amount of ego. I need to stop being a yes man to everyone, to stop putting everyone’s needs and wants before my needs. I need to not just focus on what’s best for me to climb out of my depression but genuinely put myself first going forward, to first only consider what benefits me and brings me value and happiness, then second I can consider how it affects others.
Like I was way too empathetic previously and couldn’t say no usually. Previously I first considered how my actions and what I did affected other people and seldom considered how they benefited me at all. It was like I had no healthy sense of ego.
I worry, would continual trips, like one every set amount of time (weekly, bi weekly, monthly, etc) help or potentially mess things up? Because I like the conclusion I came to and I’ve been doing pretty well after that.
6 months ago
Anonymous
Tolerance supposedly wears off after two weeks even on large trips. I'm in a weird stage where tolerance should have worn off on me but I still can't trip. Chewed 5g and barely felt it this past week. Going to wait until New years before trying again. Regarding your self image. No comment, that's your self image.
Read her this post I made shit talking therapy about a month ago >I don't like how unstable people who do therapy sound. It's always "today gave me a lot to talk about with my therapist" or "thank God I've therapy two days from now". Does that sound like a mentally stable person or like someone who's a few bad dice rolls away from crumbling? I'm not saying you shouldn't talk with others about your problems but considering yourself someone who takes care of his mental health because you became dependant on paying a stranger to hear you talk once a week is absolutely delusional; especially when you consider how these same people usually look down on those who don't do therapy. >"Oh, John is a real piece of work. He walks around moping about his issues and letting them frick up his head. Not like me though. Everything is fine and dandy as long as I keep paying doctor Lipschitz to hear me b***h about life and pretend to give a frick." >That doesn't sound pathological to you?
your entire tirade falls apart at >considering yourself someone who takes care of his mental health
because someone in therapy knows they need help with their mental health, dolt. also nice bit of antisemitism there kek. poltrash loves their spergouts
>because someone in therapy knows they need help with their mental health
Therapy goers treat that shit like the mental equivalent of taking a shower. For them doing therapy is taking care of their mental health. The most extreme do believe those who don't do therapy to be the mental equivalent of a smelly hobo.
Btw Lipschitz was the name of the therapist from the Rugrats you politically lobotomized c**t.
That's pretty normal these days for women to go to therapy and push their partners into it. Rejoice because it means you probably have a quality girl. Also rejoice because she clearly cares enough about you to insist you go to therapy.
Go to therapy. Try it out. It could change your life.
I don't want to sound like a b***h, but I've lost my creative spark and I don't know how to get it back. I used to draw, write, film videos and want to do these big things. Now? There's nothing there. Just, go to work, pay bills, etc. I'm mundane.
I was gonna say it could be technology and consuming but seems like maybe your just burnt out. Work also probably leaves you pretty drained. You have to make time for it maybe doing a little bit daily or on weekends.
Frick it, I'll bite, mostly because I really don't like writing in a journal, and also because I like it when I feel like someone is listening to my problems.
I'm fat, but of course I am, my dumbass has been fat all my life, with my lowest weight being in Highschool when I was counting my calories, had a Weights and Conditioning class, and had someone else cooking for me.
I gained all my weight after my only girlfriend dumped me, I fell into a deep depression, that I never recovered from because my support systems were non-existent, so I internalized all the hatred I felt for her, and inflicted it upon myself. This coping method caused me to throw opportunity after opportunity under the bus before eventually getting to where I am now, friendless, girlfriendless, fat, and working a job as a stocker at a grocery store.
I have no incentive to actually go out and try to meet anyone, because I live in the middle of asscrack nowhere, Michigan, where basically every chick who would have been available has moved away from this shithole, is already getting married, or is already in a relationship, and the other guys my age are more interested in getting on that 60hr workweek grindset to afford whatever it is, or are focused on their own pursuits or partners.
So, here I am, plagued by my memories of Highschool, which was the best time of my life, with a partial IT degree, haunted by memories of an old life.
It's looking way better ever since I stopped taking fricking Zoloft, but it's still not the best.
I want to lose nearly 100lbs as fast as possible as I want to join some branch of the military to pay off my school debts, have a job in a more interesting field, have structure in my life, and get out of this shithole, but my fatass just LOVES stuffing his face full of whatever junk I can get my hands on.
I'd love to do rolling 24hrs to fast the weight off, but I don't have the mental discipline to deal with it, and I don't know how to develop that.
Discipline has to be developed like anything else. You know what you need to do, and you know how to do it. That's good.
Now you need to do it.
Rolling 24 hour fasts aren't going to work right now because you're undisciplined, but could you do a single 24 hour fast this week? Yeah, easily. Do that.
If you're 100 pounds overweight, then you're definitely eating or drinking shit that you shouldn't be. Stop that immediately. Go dump the last of your soda and snacks into the toilet. You can do that now before you have a chance to talk yourself out of it, no willpower required.
Don't expect to unfrick yourself in one stroke of Herculean effort. It doesn't work that way. One thing that's been helping me lately is to write a checklist in my notebook before i go to bed of the things i need to get accomplished the next day. Seeing boxes unchecked is a good way to keep yourself accountable.
You can do it, man. But you have to actually do it.
I've started counting calories. LoseIt. The past couple of days have really been eye opening for how fricked my eating has been. What I assumed was normal portion sizes were fricking massive. I mostly avoid soda now, and now I will start to focus on not eating like a lard, and excepting that I will be hungry.
I counted calories once before, it's how I lost the weight the first time, and now I am going to do it again. I thought I didn't need to do it, but after seeing even the past three days I am angry with myself, as that could have been so many months saved had I just started when I got off the meds.
The plan was to be a Healthy weight by December, after my 6 month cleanse period was over so I could just join the Airforce then, but I chuffed it. I'll get there. I need to
My amazing perfect tomboy gf of over a year now just ‘came out’ to me today as ‘nonbinary’ and wants to use They/Them pronouns. I’m pretty fricking torn up over it because I know I’m going to have to break up with her over it, I have absolutely 0 respect for this pronoun shit. She’s so fricking perfect though bros, super cute, super outdoorsy, surprisingly strong and we wrestle all the time. I really love her, we were working on plans to move out of state together after graduation and I really thought I’d finally found the one. Fricking genderspecials ruin absolutely fricking everything I’m furious.
>yea that pronoun shit is cringe af. Well sounds like you have a decision personally it depends on how far gone gf is. Idk if politics are different its usually fine but if its unavoidable like pronouns then it may be an L.
Don't dump her over it, berate her until she knocks it off or leaves. Women are moronic and malleable. This is a good thing. You need to enforce your will on her. If she respects you, she will eventually adopt all of your major opinions. >t. Wife was president of some gay group in high school, now hates homos and Black folk.
You think it matters what she calls herself moron? If a teapot says it wants to be a cutting board it’s still a fricking teapot. Literally does not change a single thing unless she cuts her breasts off or something, so impregnate her or marry her or some shit before that happens
Broke up with girlfriend of 3 years because she was cheating on me. At first it felt liberating, but the realization is starting to sink in and I feel horribly depressed. Went to the gym today to get my mind off it and unironically almost started crying during my workouts. She was my first girlfriend, and the first girl I lost my virginity with. Shit really hurts bad bros. I’m not sure how to proceed. I know it’s for the best in the long run but right now I’m hurting pretty fricking bad.
>3 years
is fine to cry but don't be a pussy.
You used to depend on her, she was your strength, now she is gone, and took that strength with her. Right now you are weaker. Be stronger than you was with her.
Here is the hymn of the cuck:
>almost started crying during my workout
I've been there but not because of women. It was pretty funny because out of the corner of my eye I saw some guy staring at me between sets and I straightened up pretty quickly after having my head in my hands.
Club soda with grenadine. My head has been pounding all day and last night was a particularly hellish night of alcohol sweats. I think I’m actually sick because I never get this shit, usually just extremely hot and hellish dreams. I was basically stuck in a loop and didn’t get any sleep or relief. Silver lining is that I’m finally back on the fasting wagon and my normal shitty foods taste like plastic poison
Going from 270 to 230 in under two months and getting no remarks about it is pretty demoralizing. I should be 220 when I see my family for christmas, I hope they have at least something nice to say.
I think people struggle to workout because they see it as a form of self improvement instead of self harm. I lift to feel pain and I'm addicted to feeling that pain and I'm totally emotionally numb and feel nothing emotionally.
Never fell for the online dating meme. 2 weeks ago I made a tinder profile out of pure loneliness: >50 matches in 5 days >message all of them >only get 5 replies total >>the frick is this shit >ask one out, she cancels on the day we had to go out >ask second one out, she cancels with some bullshit excuse that she's sick >ask third one out, she removes me >ask fourth one out, left on seen >ask fifth one out, "id love to but im busy in the next 3 weeks" , obvi not interested >delete all the apps >continue playing video games alone in my house
Not feeling sorry for myself, nor am I b***hing. Just in feeling slumped and friend-simulating with my IST anons because i have no friends irl.
These things are pure luck. Yeah, obviously if you have decent pics and know how to talk you'll have a better tame but even Chad has to go through stupid shit and time wasters on tinder. I recall some pua guy who fricked 100+ girls talking about how his rate of success is 1 in 10. Now imagine it's even lower on apps full of women who are talking with dozens of guys at the same time or are there only for the dopamine hit. If you refuse to go for 5/10 or lower things get even rougher. I pull a decent woman from the apps every two months or so but I'm selective as frick. You could probably pull one or two a month if your only criteria is not being fat.
Also, these things are huge time waster. You've no idea how much. Keep an eye out for gold diggers and split things on the first date too.
Skinnyfat 4 lyfe.
Lost a lot of weight but stuck at skinnyfat for the past 2 years. Been lifting consistently and have barely put on any muscle. Thought I had diet figured out but apparently not.
Oh well, at least I'm not an obese alcoholic smoker anymore.
Today I'm going to OHP before bench press.
I haven't really touched a woman in years.
There's a stranger in the neighborhood who tries to have conversations with me. I don't really know him but he saw me running at 6AM a couple times and started saying hello.
Swiss Miss in whole milk, with the little marshmallows.
I need to make a change in my career, but even though I'm single I can't relocate for family reasons. It's depressing because I'm getting lines dropped from some pretty serious companies and I can't take advantage of any of them. Meanwhile, I have to wait and pounce on every good opening in my area because my specialty is not heavily represented here.
On the upside, Q1 starts in January which means lots of new job postings even with a recession. After I pull off the move, I'll be on a good trajectory for my long-term career and financial goals but until then I'm stuck.
Unrelated, where the frick do people meet new friends and women? Dating apps aren't for the former and are a crapshoot for the latter.
I used to yearn for a girlfriend but after interacting with various women I've realized that happiness can only come from within, and I'm fine with being alone for a while.
I’ve had a number of experiences with women this year that has completely changed my perspective on the entire gender. I never put them on a pedestal, I never gave up my personality for sex, I’ve never hated women at any point either too be clear, but I became close to a number of women this year with wildly different lifestyles but the same dumb shit they’d do being a common thread. I could go into detail about the women and their effects on me but that’s not the point, it’s that through all that I’ve reached a point of peace.
For the longest time I thought myself an unlovable monster, due to mental health and upbringing, and finally breaking thinking that whilst also being witness to another’s self destruction, it was scary. I’ve been a person that was so consumed by what I wasn’t, that I never celebrated who I am or who I could be. Now I gotta find the first step to figuring that out, well the second step since gym/overall physical health was first step. I’m not sure what the step is but I’m excited to find it.
>have no clue on how to socialmax >that's my resolution for 2024 >went to sspx mass >talked to a chud there and he said that the women there are worse than secular prostitutes lol
I was gonna, but I didn't want to bore people with it. >be me >start going to sspx mass because my priest won't stfu about "refugees welcome" nonsense and women dress like absolute thots and it's distracting of course >try to go this sunday, supposedly it's on the 4th sunday of the month >it's closed >see some other dude around >"Hey, do you happen to be here for mass?" >Start chatting with the guy, he's clearly intelligent, well versed in theology and philosophy, but a manlet, with a bunch of acne and chud haircut. >Soon realized he's borderline blackpilled and starts hitting me with redpill slang,like incels, etc, which honestly was based. >I tell him I'm honestly sick of women dressing like prostitutes in Novus Ordo, and at sspx they wear a veil... >"there's people coming to mass simply because they are incels and think they are going to find something here" >"If I told you what I've heard about some of the people who attend these ultra conservative circles, you wouldn't believe it, I don't wanna say names tho." >" the new converts are always the worst, the born again virgins etc" >I nod my head and concur >He later on mentioned out country, Portugal should be a dictatorship and I smiled thinking he was being sarcastic be he maintained a very serious expression lol >We also discussed how women shouldn't vote etc, very based indeed., he says: >These women are very trad, but then they meet some tall guy with muscles and they get with him quickly"
I couldn't help but think he was only saying this because he was a manlet Incel/volcel wtv, but even though I'm 6'0 myself, I agree with him. I do think women do have to be somewhat fricked up to start going to ultra trad latin mass, like, women are very agreeable and this is not the norm. Like being a punk, rockabilly, goth is out of the norm...and we know those girls aren't very normal.But then again, and we talked about this, the average secular woman that goes to novus ordo, has at least 5 bodies.
I always kept my distance from sspx because it seems like the kind of thing that attracts the wrong people for the wrong reasons. Also because it's a clearly schismatic and heretical movement. Novus Ordo does feel spiritually dead tho. There's no sense of community and people seem to be just going through the motions. I wonder if I should give a chance to ortholarping but it seems like the kind of thing you've to be born into, otherwise you become some incel perpetually rambling about Patriach Chudwel and obscure ecumenical decisions from the third century instead of focusing on being a good Christian.
There's also the fact everyone who goes there in my country is eastern european, middle eastern or greek so I would stick out like a sore thumb.
>There's also the fact everyone who goes there in my country is eastern european, middle eastern or greek so I would stick out like a sore thumb.
>yeah I would also like to try it but it's exactly as you've said. It's 99% Ukrainians who attend here, and mass is in Ukrainian yeah... But women do wear a veil so.
In some ways I’m making my life better but meeting a girl feels like it’s farther away than ever.
I thought I was learning to just put up with it but that won’t be possible. I just keep getting sadder and sadder.
>go out to get dinner with friends >waitress our age, pretty alternative girl nothing I would date but definitely frick >look up, giving me THOSE eyes, shes blushing when she talks to me and does the whole hair twirling shit >keeps coming by the whole night to talk to me see how only I’m doing, stuff like leans in close to me, squeezed my bicep a few times, typical shit Ive encountered when a woman is 100% into me >decide I’ll get her number when we’re leaving see where it goes she seems cool >fat frick balding manlet with patchy pubic hair cope beard and his first Gf, also a fat frick randomly say out loud that she’s really hot >manlet starts saying out loud that she’s into him and wants him >asks his GF if she agrees, if she would be down to try to have a threesome with her >the GF hesitates and agrees with him in what seemed like a little white lie to protect his feelings sort of way >think okay whatever she’s blown you off the entire time and has been up only my ass go ahead try homosexual >dude starts flat out demanding she comes home with him and his gf doesn’t even attempt to be smooth about it just flat out grabs her by the shirt like a child and says “H-HI I COULDNT HELP BUT NOTICE YOU EYEING ME D-d- would y- w-would you like to come home with me and my beautiful wife here?” >half the tables around us have gone silent and are staring >waitress goes blank faced and stares. Looks back to me with this “wtf” expression >I literally face palmed I don’t think I’ve ever done that in a non joking way in my life >she leaves, different waitress finishes up with us >this fricking geek then later in the night kept talking about how shy he made her and how much she wanted him and his whale. I’ve cut this dipshit off. I cant be friends with something like this. I also can’t help but feel he did this not due to lack of social aptitude but to be malicious because hes always tried to ruin anything I do, or he will take credit for any success I do have
i dont blame you for cutting him off. that is some extremely moronic shit to be doing. if he is willing to do that around you now, imagine the kind of shit he is going to do later that is going to be much worse.
I know. I’ve been his friend for over 5 years. It’s gradually become worse and worse over time. He’s done all sorts of stupid shit. I could go on and on telling stories, but bottom line it just plain seems to be that he’s extremely insecure and envious. The dudes a fricking loser. He’s lucky that I had the self control in various other circumstances where he 100% deserved this, but to not kick his ass and show his heifer how pathetic he was.
Here’s an example to show what kind of weak homosexual this is >dude says he wants to tear the heads off of an invasive mouse species in our area to attempt to sound valiant >really he likes the power of feeling justified to torture something smaller than himself for a change, randomly says this all the time, but it’s still all just talk because he has never done a thing physical in his life
He’s 5’1” if that wasn’t obvious
Since there's so much discussion about dating apps on the thread, what's the deal with walled women with a profile full of exigences that act very combative while talking? I mean it's obvious from the get go that they're insecure as hell but what's up with the weapons grade cope? I don't understand what's the play here. Acting like that will alienate any man besides the desperate and undesirable ones. Is the whole charade just a way for them to go "I tried the apps but didn't find any decent men" and justify their loneliness to themselves?
My ex was so easy to make cum. I'd do it once with my fingers every single time, then she'd cum twice or more from getting doggystyled before I did.
My current gf usually cant cum at all without a vibrator. She cant even get herself off with her fingers. Ive gotten her to squirt like once from really rough doggy but never again. Feels bad man.
>too fat to escape neet
I couldn’t find clothes that fit for interviews. Not even just a polo shirt. I’m not even so ginormous I should have that kind of problem yet I’m 6’2” 290lbs. Disgusting and fat, but not can’t find clothes that fit fat… or so I thought…
Anyways I don’t have time to wait I’m upping the ante on my cut, full on starvation crash diet. 1lb a week is fricking moronic at this size. 1000 calories a day nothing but potatoes and chicken. I need to drop more like 3lbs a week until I’m able to fit into my old clothes again. Looking at 3 months of this minimum for that.
I kissed and licked the breasts of a girl in my uni elevator. I don’t like her and I feel really guilty for that, especially cause I sat next to the girl I actually like and said “shes really weird she basically tried to rape me its unattractive”. I told the girl I kissed I’m uninterested before but I just thought frick it, but yeah I feel really bad and guilty. What should I do to alleviate the guilt other than kill myself
Don't talk shit about other women in front of a woman. You're just asking for trouble. Just let it all sizzle down and minimize contact with the girl in question.
Guilt is one of the consequences. It'll go away, but take this as a hard lesson. >t. felt guilty from playing with women too
I'll take eggnog. Good vibes today. Went to a barbeque with my siblings this weekend and had a long chat with them. Even though my family has become a lot smaller over the years, it's times like these that make me appreciate the ones that really matter and look out for me more. Makes me feel a little foolish for even caring about others that have done nothing but given me headaches and debts
>still forever alone >still haven't reached 1/2/3/4 after nearly 1 year of going to the gym >still stuck in level 1 job at company >still /fat/
It's rough bros
I say this in the nicest way: get over yourself man
>still forever alone
You're currently alone. Not forever. >still haven't reached 1/2/3/4 after nearly 1 year of going to the gym
Nearly 1 year is barely shit and most people will never achieve 1/2/3/4, expecting yourself to do it in less than a year is insane. If you're not blasting PEDs 1/2/3/4 takes years to achieve and is extremely impressive, in the top 1% of lifters, despite what morons here who do not post body will tell you. Achieving those lifts as a natty takes not only a long time but a long time spent efficiently of grueling, disciplined progressive overload where you are constantly pushing yourself to do more volume than your last training session. >still stuck in level 1 job at company >still /fat/
Judging by your attitude about 1/2/3/4 I'm assuming you haven't been "stuck" for more than a year.
Instant gratification only happens in video games. Just keep pushing. Little by little.
Frick if I know. Left is more work though so be careful of not having your hair look like shit because you get lazy. Right is more youthful and better if its hot as frick/hard trouble taking care of your hair.
Well the week started off shit. I tried inviting a girl out but i couldnt even do it because the conversation kept changing too fast for me to even say anything. The manlet won today's battle but ill win the whole war. On a more positive note my back is fully healed and i can now squat again so 40kg here we go again.
I asked the cute redhead girl out in my english class. First I went to her to that I wanted to speak with her after class and she said like yeah ofcourse with a smile. I waited until she was done and I told her " I want to know you better so do you want to have lunch together next monday." She smiled and said "Thats lovely but im sorry I already have a boyfriend." I think I said shit outloud but I said its okay and we talked a bit about her presentation until I told her I had to go to my next class. Im kinda bummed she said no since shes so far the most beautifull girl I saw in my uni but idk. It is what it is
Well shit man. Ive had that happen a lot aswell. One case hurt bad because she made a holocaust joke the first day we met. Would have been wife material if she wasnt taken. Ill have a protein shake to a future where we all make it.
Frick man that must have hurt. But yea im bummed out by it since she is seriously the most beautifull girl I saw so far. Does engineering just like me and a smile that would make the angels even jealous. But it is what it is. I asked and now that I know the answer I move on.
Cheers for a better future
Nice job. It happens. Now do it again with another cute girl and take a bit less time to get around to asking her. Do this until it becomes habit and you start slaying pussy, or you find a really good girl and you dedicate to her. Don't just give up on the first one. You've unlocked the secret that everyone freaks out about for most of their lives.
>girl in my friends group is a hot tomboy goth girl who lifts. >I'm crushing hard on her >she says she likes strong buff men >went back to lifting two months ago. Muscle memory is kicking in and I'm getting gains >suddenly new guy enters my friend group >buff gym goer, kind of DYEL for IST standards but pretty good looking >girl starts flirting with him and praising his body and voice >completely ignores me
I kind of want to kill myself tbqh
If she wasn't flirting with you already, she wasn't going to flirt with you getting buff. Thems just the facts bruh. Unless some situation happened that changed things between you, you're "friendzoned" so to speak. I'm talking like high in the woods just you two together on a friend-trip.
I'll have a whiskey, neat. Make it a double. >be me >trying to lose weight >started at 212 >Intermittent fasting, doing pretty well. It's not even hard >down to 203 before Thanksgiving >One big meal won't kill me >206 the day after >think "whatever, probably just water weight. I'll get my diet back on track and it'll be gone in a day or two" >go back to my regular diet >209 this morning
What the frick, how!? It doesn't even make sense! How the hell did I lose weeks of progress in just the past few days?
It’s just of the game man. Any number of things could cause that >sodium >water intake >lifting >cardio, believe it or not >how much you pissed >fiber
Just trust the process. I’ve been there. I advise you to not look at the scale for another 3 weeks though, that’s the trick I had to do. Just assume each week I weighed less, weigh at 3 week mark and boom usually, not always because homosexual fluctuations, but usually I would be even lower. Guarantee in the next 3 weeks you lose more than you expected
I've been getting more reckless recently. I work a dangerous job and I've been taking unnecessary risk outside of work I've just been reckless too. It didn't hit me until I heard it separately from a friend a co-worker. Think it's because I just don't know what I'm doing. Feels like I'm just spinning my wheels. I've got hobbies, friends, and family but life just feels like a drag and nothing feels worth it. Recently I can't help but think I just want to kill myself. Life doesn't feel worth living in the long run.
I dont know what I want out of life anons.
I have some fitness/martial arts goals but those will come to pass in no time. I don't know if I want a family. I know that I don't want to work a 9-5 forever, even if it is a cushy software dev Job. I've always dreamed of starting my own business but I wouldn't even know where to start. Ive thought about it a lot. I like to be good at things I do, which includes my job, but I don't want to put so much effort into becoming a good software dev when all it nets you is a better paycheck working for someone else.
Not to mention a lot of very smart people seem to think AI is about to frick shit up in the next decade. For now I distract myself with fitness and chasing women, but I know over the next few years these thoughts are going to become my greatest challenge. What is to become of me by 40? A family man working a 9-5 for someone else? I'm sure it's not so bad. I'm sure it's good even, I just don't think it's what I want.
I dont know anons. I just don't know. One day I'm going to wake up and life is going to have been and gone. I need to make sure I don't regret how I've spent it..
>MUH SOFTWARE DEV
Why don't you try getting a job that actually has a tangible impact on society instead of just working for MUH MONEY
When I no longer need to play for food/shelter/utilities, I will do so. For now I chase money. I wish it wasn't this way.
Frick society, just want the money to buy the stuff, and being wfh is the cherry on top. Sorry that you have social needs you can't fulfil online or with the pleasure of your own company
>Why don't you try getting a job that actually has a tangible impact on society i
Tech does have a tangible impact on society. Forgoing things like tech, law, science, & art to go be a tradesman is precisely why you're taxed to death, legally liable for chastising a troony, will get automated, and have no good entertainment all while you clean Democrat toilets.
I'd gladly work with my hands if it afforded me any real power and influence instead of making me an even bigger cuck.
I feel you bro. I'm a mid-30s software dev too. My wife left me about a year ago and I've been having a low-key existential crises ever since.
Right now I'm looking into re-skilling and making my goal early retirement. If I can stick out my current pattern till 45 I can retire.
And silver lining is that if things ever get too tough I can kms.
omg, you might have to retire at 45? my god, how will you overcome such an existential crisis like this?
Water please. I got so drunk last wednesday that i've only recovered today. I didn't make much of a fool of myself in the bar, but rest of the night was skecthy. Problems started(honestly when i opened the first beer) when I accidentally locked myself out and was either too stingy or drunk to call the housing servises to open my door. Started the 10km walk to my dads place in 10cm snow and light shoes. Bought some extra beer at 6am. Got more than half way but tried to take a bus for the last half. That was a big mistake since I ended up going to the wrong direction and i was 10km away again. Caught a cab. For some reason my pants were wet, but i'm still not sure if it was just a ruptured can of beer from my pack or had i just pissed myself.
Overall not too bad, at least compared to how it usually goes but i'm more than glad that i've managed to cut down my drinking to ~once a month. As you can propably deduce from my irrelevant story i have trouble controlling after i start. I just got absolutely fed up with my neet life and repeatedly waking up wishing that the day was already over. I've got some serious health issues and can't properly exercise anymore, so my life lost a mighty chunk of meaning. The take away from this blog post should be to diversify your coping methods before you need to. 3 years down and I'm still struggling to live meaningfully and deal with life without exercising the feels away.
Seltzer water, please.
The shame and guilt of ghosting my training partners at the gym and my last job still haunt me. Lifting doesn't help; I just feel disappointed when I'm done because I know the gyms I used to train with are going harder and making way more gains. Money wise, I've had a bunch of expenses come up and may have to buy a new car soon. God, I feel sick to my stomach most nights.
To keep it IST, I just finished a calisthenics routine: 5 pullups, 10 ring dips and 20 squats with a kettlebell, for 7 rounds, followed by 4 rounds on the heavy bag. want to get below 170 before the end of the year, currently 179 at 5'8
shouldn't it be redirect the elephant, motivate the rider?
Just got diagnosed with autism as an adult. The initial evaluation I took had a score of 65/240 as the lowest end for diagnosis. Average autistic guy gets a score of 130 or so and I got 175. Therapist said that I made it this far because I'm also very above average intelligence (150ish IQ) so I could still catch and emulate patterns even if I don't actually feel or understand why I'm supposed to act a certain way. I'm 28 and I'm nearly a NEET but I'm trying my best. Even had a few gfs but even when things were getting serious I was still weirdly disconnected apparently even if it was obvious I loved them. It makes a lot of sense looking back on my life getting this diagnosis. I don't really know what to do with this information but it's on my mind a lot these past few days.
Is it worth being diagnosed properly? Or would you have been better off having no clue? I’ve asked multiple therapists and they never gave me a legitimate test just said “no you’re normal haha” or “no I have a nephew who is autistic he’s 8 years old you’re nothing like him.”
Which isn’t exactly helpful… Who do I see, a specialist? Or have I just had shit luck with lazy therapists?
>high IQ
When I was a young child, pre kindergarten age, the teacher told my parents to have me tested. She said I had behavioral issues and thought I was Asperger’s. My parents took me to some old guy, and I did a few shape puzzles with him and then spent the time being a smart ass and talking bakc and trying to ignore him to play with the toys he had in his office and made it difficult for him to actually do his job. He seemed to just give up and lose patience and told my parents I was normal but I was advanced for my age.
BUT through my whole life I’ve had so many similarities to the average autist. I at times wonder if my parents knew but kept it from me worrying it would hold me back, as a built in excuse for failure. Idk. I’m also 28 and I worry about whether it would serve me in any way to know if I was or just ultimately hold me back and maybe even make me sad. Like you, despite all of this I’ve had a few GFs but I’ve been pretty disconnected with all people in my life.
My high school had a psychologist/therapist who we could see freely. After years of talking with me and observing me on campus, he called my mom up and told her that he strongly suspected I had autism, and that she should have me go through the official process so I could get a diagnosis. My mom refused because she didn't want me to have that label.
I believe that psychologist was right and that I do indeed have autism; I've long felt I had the symptoms. Just like you I have an above-average IQ (tested while getting a prescription for Ritalin) which has allowed me to skirt by in life.
>so I could still catch and emulate patterns even if I don't actually feel or understand why I'm supposed to act a certain way.
This is exactly how I have gotten by. I used to be incredibly socially awkward to the point that I was afraid to talk. Thankfully I learned to emulate people around me and it worked, I started to improve socially. This caused my confidence to improve which in turn reduced my anxiety and made me even more normal. Eventually I got to the point that I could sit next to random women in class and strike up conversations and befriend them - by senior year I was walking around campus with up to 5 women with me and people would notice, they were actually nicer to me and treated me well. I also for the first time got to experience being wanted by women, which is such an incredible ego boost.
Post college though I ended up working remote, and during Covid the 2 years of no social contact completely destroyed my social skills. I am now back to square one; completely awkward and having trouble making eye contact.
What great heights I reached, and how far I've fallen. At least I know what is possible though. I am struggling to reach those prior heights but I have to, because I've been single for 3 years now. I worry if I don't regain my social skills I might hit 40 and still not have a wife. That scares me... I don't want to die alone anon
What am I so horny all the time? I feel like I’m a teenager again. How do I slow it down?
You're healthy. Don't wish for that feeling to go away.
No, I am used to having a normal arousal levels, it’s just the past couple of week have been way more than normal. Like, after I finish I am fully hard less than 10 minutes later and not being able to calm it down no matter how hard I try
>GF bought an elliptical machine 3 months ago for $250
>still in the box and she hasn't even made an attempt to set it up.
I love this woman but she is very fat and I can already see that any fricking attempt to change her lifestyle is just not going to work, not sure what to do.
>I can already see that any attempt to change her lifestyle is not going to work
>giving up before trying
NGMI
You have to do it for her anon. Start using it first then she will.
Whiskey.
I've been struggling immensely the past few months. My sister and nephew were killed in an car "accident. Some guy wanted to kill himself. Went out, got drunk, and got into his car and flew down a straight ass highway as fast as he could and plowed into them. He survived, went to the hospital, was able to go check himself out of the hospital, and went home and blew his brains out.
I was super close to both of them, and they were just at my house a week prior for my daughters birthday party. They were just deleted out of my life.
We put up our Christmas decorations today, and my daughter was so excited, and I could just think that I'll never have another Christmas with them. I kept thinking about how my parents lost both their daughter, and their grandson. Like if I lost my daughter, and her child. I haven't told a lot of people around me just because I honestly feel guilty about telling them. It's just so fricking terrible, and I know there's nothing they can say that'll make me feel better, so I'm literally just poisoning a social interaction. Making them feel bad about the circumstance, and then having pity on me. I'd rather just avoid it.
I'm sorry anon. That's the kind of thing only time can heal.
Go to the library and use their internet. Or see if they'll give you a job.
Careful. Relationships can be wonderful but they can also ruin your life. See
Jesus christ anon that's rough, I feel for you. I wish you strength.
I'm sorry
I am sorry to hear that anon. I can somewhat relate and time will heal you and your family. Do not give up and stay strong.
I’m sorry, anon. Find peace knowing it was painless and be grateful for the time you had with them. Never forget it. Let it keep you sharp and hungry to never take life for granted. You will find peace
My cousin died 9 years ago, right around this time of year. Whenever it's thanksgiving I think about it. He was the same age as me, super outgoing, extremely well-liked and popular, smart, going into science. He was a good kid. He and another were killed by a drugged-up driver.
I feel like he was always destined for great things, and he was always so kind to me even though he could just treat me like the loser I (rightfully) was. I kind of feel like I owe it to him to try harder in life, for his sake. Seeing his folks deteriorate year after year is so rough. I miss him.
love you matt. Wish you were here.
JFC I'm so sorry man. Some of the worst shit a man can go through, just grieve at your own pace but life will go on.
Go to physical therapy to get those muscle knots out and tell her you went to therapy, you ain't lying
Just give me something rum-based, barkeep. I don't care what.
I have been on the path to self-improvement for the past nine months now. I have been working out, trying to improve my diet, and generally doing what I can to make my life better for the sake of my wife and daughter. I started this journey for them because I love them, and I want my daughter growing up with healthy life habits, while I want my wife to follow my example for our little girl as well. Nine fricking months. And you know what? My wife has gotten WORSE. I know the path of self-improvement is a long haul, but jesus christ she is unable to do the most basic shit for herself. She is lazy and unmotivated to do anything for our house or family, unless it involves spending my money, and everything you'd expect a stay at home wife to do (like cooking or cleaning), she instead foists on me to do when I return home from work. And on the rare days she is actually willing to do something productive, well boy howdy wouldn't you know she suddenly gets a headache or a stomachache or some other moronic excuse to lay in bed and waste her days watching YouTube videos. I love her, but I am absolutely fricking sick and tired of her weakness. I'm tired of her being a pathetic waste of space that seems to exist just to do nothing until she dies. I have no idea how to tell her to shape the frick up, but I know I need to, because her behavior is unacceptable for our daughter.
shes tired from me fricking her while youre at work
Based
Here's your (You) samegay
You bring shame to these threads.
Best not to feed the troll, brother
>Best not to feed the troll, brother
I never say this, but holy shit go back to redit you homosexual
Tell her l, anon. Tell her just like you said it here. Let it sting. Then tell her if she doesn’t shape up that you will leave. Stick to your word. You will either save your marriage or you will get out of it while you still have time to start a new life with someone else.
I'm so bad at socializing I get depressed whenever I talk to someone. I know the solution is
>just practice talking
but how can I do that when I get pain and self hate every single time?
Push through the pain bro, just like at the gym. It'll lessen over time and one day won't be painful at all
If you feel like shit just get a load of me and you'll feel a whole lot better about your life:
>move to new city to live with gf
>2 months in she says this isn't gonna work
>she gives me 2 days to move out
>new flat is too far from work (no other choices, housing crisis)
>pay the first month and the deposit, all my money gone
>have to quit job and find new one
>no one will hire me
>finally get an interview
>"we'd like to offer you the job"
>keep it calm and collected and just say ok
>ask them if this is official, they say yes and send me the contract
>2 days later they call me and say "we couldn't get in touch with your previous employer, the answer is no from us"
>ask them why did they offer me the job in the first place if they hadn't called my prev employer
>"apologies, a matter of miscomunication between hr agents"
>i had already e-mailed all the other recruiters that I got a job so they can cancel me out
>20$ in bank account
>rent is due in 4 days
>gonna live on the street
>no car
>can't go back home because i've no money for a plane ticket
>wont have the luxury of "finding a solution" as i wont have normal access to wifi or electricity
>it's -5 degrees
it is what it is aye
kazakhstan'd
Why did you willingly sacrifice your job and home at your girlfriends demand? You are a cuck.
also
>going out of your way telling other potential options to no longer consider you before having a signed contract in hand
prognosis: not going to make it
I laugh at these little autistic homosexuals on these threads and the fact that they're trying to better themselves just makes me laugh even more. If you're a little autistic gay it doesn't matter how much lifting you do. You'll always be a little autistic gay.
This
I will take your experience as a lesson in not being a Simp, it gets you nowhere in life except a painful time. Women can get fricked.
I want a girlfriend. I've seen people on IST wish their cultures did arranged marriage, but trust me it is very frustrating to sit and twiddle my thumbs until my parents finally start looking for someone.
My advice is for you to practice no nut and stoicism. You yearn for something that only exists in your imagination. The "girlfriend" you envision is an abstract concept, real women are far different, more ruthless, vile, emotionless and cunning. Disappointment is imminent even if you enter a relationship. Not telling you to die alone. A real woman will come to you naturally once you've unlocked true masculinity and stability. It starts from no nut and stoicism.
>It starts from no nut and stoicism
Replace stoicism with Jesus Christ and no nut with straight up celibacy and I agree with your post
oh yeah dude everyone on this planet that got a girl did nofap, so tried and true
>forced to be off work wednesday through friday for the holiday (used paid time off to cover it)
>decline to go to family thanksgiving to not be a loser around family
>spend holiday alone
>literally haven't stepped foot out of the house since Wednesday morning
>completely and utterly waste 4 days of my life with nothing to show for them, don't even remember what I did
my life is the most humiliating and pathetic of anyone on this board
why dont you go for a little walk around the block or something? doesn't have to be anything crazy, just get your legs moving. you'll feel a little bit better. maybe up it to a few times around the block if you are feelings up to it.
It's okay to feel like shit, but don't let yourself wallow.
>my life is the most humiliating and pathetic of anyone on this board
that's a big claim normie
A lady friend suggested we go for a walk for our second date, she flaked on me because her neice babysitting duties were unexpectedly extended. Asked to reschedule, but no apology.
We also had to reschedule our first date, but she did apologise that time. We had a great first date.
I don't want to overthink what just happened, but maybe she's just not interested and I shouldn't waste my time. On the plus side: I didn't get ghosted. This is all confusing and I'm probably overthinking the circumstances... human relations are confounding.
The strongest chocolate milk you have.
Reposting from other thread:
>cold approach this girl I like
>have a semi-awkward conversation about literature and books we read when we were young
>have to leave in the middle of convo
>2 months later we haven't talked once
>no natural ways to start a conversation
How do I talk to this women without coming off as an autist? Should I wait for a chance or just approach her again out of nowhere? I've never done this sort of thing before
Need more info. Did she leave in the middle of the conversation? Where do you run into her? At the very least, I'd say flat-out ask her out. Make sure you're dressed nicely, groomed, etc. It'll be less creepy, for sure.
>>cold approach this girl I like
2 months is enough time to prove you are not a simp, she prob thought you were bored and wanted to chat don't over think it, that's her job. Just aproach her and ask her about black friday or whatever moronation normies like to chat over, if the talk isn't akward just ask her if she wants to hang out sometime.
>Water, as always.
Question for the two or three heterosexual fitizens at the bar.
If you were trapped In a saw like dead game, and the test was about making a guy cum, and your ONLY two choices are either blow him or use your butthole..
What would you choose?
butthole of course. You will face the other way and pretend you are making a nasty shit. You can be passive.
With mouth you have to be active and even if you close your eyes you will feel everything 100x with things your butthole doesn't have: taste, smell, etc.
Anyone choosing mouth is a gay homosexual homosexual who secretly enjoys it.
Idn dude. You would live knowing that a man fricked you.
You do have your prostate which means that you can feel pleasure from having passive gay sex. You could even moan and cum.
The bj saves you from that scenario.
Just root beer
>have minor/borderline mild scoliosis since teenage years
>enjoyed boxing, muay thai, and hiking a lot
>do stretches and exercises to keep my posture up
>now late 20s
>curve suddenly rapidly progressing because of disc degeneration
>if they do the surgery, I can't do contact sports ever again or even throw a proper punch
>can't go on multiday hiking trip too. Heavy load might blow my back out
>not to mention the failure rate alone scares me something fierce
Man, I hate growing old.
I started out as a skinny 90 pound girl. i wanted to get hot and muscular so i started on a program and noticed some hardcore noob gains. I'm up 15 pounds and i look fricking hot. i'm finally developing muscles i can be proud of. I feel great about myself and my progress, but my boyfriend who is skinny and eats like two small meals a day doesn't want to go to the gym with me. he just straight up doesn't want to put in the effort. it's fricking gay because he is already hot and tall. he has so much potential to be a pure chad but it's just too hard for him and he always gives up.
i'm busting my ass, hitting PRs, going to the gym at 6 in the morning, and I have nobody to share that shit with. he will never be there to see me hit any PRs. he just wants to sit at home and play fricking hearts of iron and complain to me about how insecure he is about his skinny torso. frick b***h just eat more and come to the gym with me. does he know how lucky he is to have a fit gym gf? i see other couples at the gym pushing each other and progressing together and i seethe honestly. i wish i had that. still love him but he's so gay sometimes
>i look fricking hot.
prove it
no you homosexuals are just gonna save it to your goondrive
you bet your ass i am
daddy needs his bust material
Post breasts or frick off prostitute
have a nice day fatty
the dream, a gf and playing hoi4, very based, tho with the effort thing I doubt you can get him to go unless you push it hard and gradually work up. He'd have to want to go himself but since thats not the case good luck.
Any barber anons? A potential opportunity to pursue barber school and means to leave my current path. Is it a good job, do you like it?
Downloaded the fricking dating apps again. Wasted my Saturday and got pics of breasts and asses. Both women who sent the pics split. I think my problem is that I don't wanna go to a date, just frick, but at the same time am very cautious towards the kind of women that would frick a complete stranger. There's also the fact that my life is a complete mess and the chase after meaningless sex distracts me but that's just details.
I dunno if I'm gonna make it brahs.
they sent you tiddy pics but didn't want to date you?
wat is wrong with women
They get horny, send shit and then ghost. That's common as frick. I remember one who was particularly hot and dtf a couple months back. We started sexting and she wanted to show me her pussy. I told her I would prefer if she didn't and we fricked than if she did and then regretted it and ghosted me. She sent the pics, jerk offd, then promptly got post coom clarity and ghosted me.
I unironicanilly encourage anons to avoid getting nudes from tinder hoes before you see each other since 9 outta 10 times it makes them get cold feet.
That too. Women don't frick as much as anons seem to believe. They are autistic as all hell by large.
Same boat Anon! Just remember to play opposites, everything you do has got to be the opposite to get the outcome you want. The nudes are a shit test kek, you have to seem unphased like you have 20 other girls sending you the same.
If you want quick easy sex, set up dates close to home with an excuse pre-existing to get them back to your place so that it "just happened" when they tell their friends. Dogs, playing guitar, even forgotten wallet and skip the date will work. They just cant feel like they are coming over for sex.
As foreign as this will all feel, all you be doing is making her head spin as to why you haven't came onto her already making her invest more into you. This is all a mind game. Keep winning player
>try out dating apps
>get 0 matches for a week
haha
Pay whale tax. Issue is the system is flawed for consumer. More apps = fraction of dating pool = less chance of theoretically impression of a female. Which is great for the company because thirsty males will pay a premium.
Set your profile to be interested in men and women. Don’t swipe on men, only women. But this will cause homosexuals to swipe on you, which gives attention to your profile and boosts it’s visibility to women. It makes your profile seem more desirable because the app doesn’t know it’s mostly men, and if you do this before it gets patched you should be able to have a profile constantly being boosted by women at a certain point so it won’t matter
I got a 30 minute boost for free on one app that pushes your visibility up to max and only got 2 likes in total.
Cool so imagine if you try my method and have that boost 24/7. 2 matches every half hour for a man is actually very good. Most guys get 2 matches a month assuming they consistently swipe and have a maxed out profile
Your method sounds good, but I'm talking about likes, not matches. The likes I get are either from fatties or pajeets that live in a different country.
I'll probably have to find a way to get decent photos first before I can try random shit to game the algorithm
I downloaded tinder after a few months off and have just been getting hit with fatties all night. I don't get why sometimes the algorithm hooks me up and sometimes it just decides to give me shit.
I've been sick all week. It's fricking up my work out plans. This winter I was gonna do the greatest bulk of all time, but I won't be able to do that if I keep getting sick.
I have no idea where to meet attractive women in a reliable fashion.
I'm just going to approach my gym crush next week I don't care anymore. Who's had success with this?
Are dating apps worth trying if I’m a KHV? I’m starting to finally get in shape (got decent muscle but still some fat to lose before it really shows) and I want a gf really bad.
no
Something light, I have gastric reflux
I'm coming back home from a wonderful weekend with a wonderful girl who is really into me. On the other hand, after so many dates I still can't feel anything for her because I'm obsessed with a coworker who rejected me multiple times.
I'd like to say I'm not talking to this coworker and time will fix it, but we are together all the time at work and she actively calls me for coffees and lunch, and I should tell her to frick off but when she smiles at me I just can't ghost her.
Oh and lately I haven't been lifting shit because I'm always on business trips and I take 12h flights and I'm tired all the time, can't even do some pushups in my hotel room.
I went to buy dog food for my parents dog. Went to the pet store near them, find bag of IAMs and pick up 40lb bag with one hand, take it to the counter. Young girl (high school most likely) working behind the counter. She starts talking about IAMs, says it is not good for dogs and makes them fat/enlarges their hearts. Says people usually don't want to hear about it, ask her to continue. She spergs out and talks a lot about dog food and what is in it. Shows me a brand she would recommend. Black Friday sale, so I get a small bag of it as well. She seems so happy that someone listened to her. Pay for dog food. Goes to grab the bags of dog food. She stops me and tells me to take the small bag of recommended food and she grabs the big bag of IAMs. Literally this bag is like half her size lol. She took it to my car. Tell her thank you, she said something idk what and runs in. That is the first human interaction I have had with someone out of my immediate family that went beyond surface level in the past 6 months. It felt really nice. She seems like a nice kid and I hope I made her day better too by listening to her rant about dog food.
nice
witnessed
I have no reason to exist
I’ll never be enough
How do I stop obsessing about women?
I've met many which I thought were great throughout my life, but every time I start thinking "She's the only one/best one I'll ever meet, I need to be with her", fully forgetting that I felt this way before and I will feel it again with someone else if it doesn't work out.
I want to engage in foreskin restoration because of the mental anguish being circumcised causes me plus to restore the physical functions for the benefit of myself and my future wife should God will that I get married. However, I feel the need to refrain from doing so because I don't want to be tempted to "test out" what has been restored and fall into grave sins. Yet the mental torment and physical discomfort it causes me continues despite refraining. One could say wait but it’s a lengthy process to restore regardless and I’m sick of the aforementioned pain. God help me.
The world was not built for sensitive young men
>be me
>realize that parents are in their 60's
>life expectancy in the US is 77 years
Just realized it's all pointless, lifting, working, self improving, going out with friends, everything. You will never make it and you will never live the life you thought you would live.
The younger generations are realizing early how fricked they are compared to the older gens.
Things weren't like this ten years ago, but they are now and they will only get worse.
with that doomer mindset yeah, your right, but what are you going to do about it? So waste away and die? At least do shit you wanna do before you perish. What do you have to lose?
I came to the same conclusion yesterday as well while browsing in one of those /gif threads, watching a video of a troony suck his own wiener and cum inside his own mouth for money. The modern world has opened up an abyss that is both horrific and always expanding, and It's malefic fumes so easily spread around the entire earth. There's no going back, and the future is a precipice.
I’ve realized it too. 10 years ago things were just starting down this path. I remember 20 years ago when I was in first grade at my school for a Halloween event there were kids fathers dressed in drag. Just obviously men with dresses and wigs on. It was funny. It wasn’t seen as degenerate. There was no one to be offended by it. Now there’s actually dudes who do that shit who would take offense, and there’s so many perverts that some child’s father doing that for laughs would be called a a sicko with other intentions because that’s just a very real thing right now with these trannies.
It’s not even just trannies
>Black folk who grew up upper middleclass in gated communities, whose parents bought them current year cameros and mustangs, b***h and Moab about how oppressed they are despite job applications quite literally saying “not for white people don’t waste our time this role is only for minority POC”, to say very little about that branch of buffoonery we have today
>white men unironically being the most oppressed group right now, except we don’t b***h and cry about that shit so it goes unnoticed and continues to be accepted
>society growing more and more degenerate, every once great country is accepting and giving housing and aid to illegal immigrants (who often openly hate those same countries and the people who belong there) while neglecting their own citizens
It’s all just a downward spiral.
I’m not even a doomer, I’m still pushing to make my dreams happen. But this shit is undeniable. It’s going to take a great reset. Shit will one day hit the fan. All I want is to buy like 100 acres and frick off away from this bullshit. I could be pretty happy on just 20-50 acres though.
men unironically being the most oppressed group right now, except we don’t b***h and cry about that shit
literally all you are doing in that pst is rambling btiching and crying. trannies, Black folk, illegal immigrants, fake victim complexing. surprised you didnt tlak about the israelites as well
you should buy 50 acres and go somewhere where no one has to interact with you or your autistic schizophrenic rambling.
He’s right and you proved his point
>single mention of something = b***hing and crying
>a single mention of something which doesn’t benefit you and you SEETHE
Uh oh is J’qrayron mad? Is the big baby man gonna.. CRY? Get fricked you section 8 aidsy nig/ scrawny 5’3” israelite, whichever you are (no major difference)
Blog update:
Ex thought she could downgrade me to fricking the bag indefinitely after four years worth of balls deep creampies.
Spoiler alert: she was wrong
I just realized that i was the practice bf to my 12 years long gf, unfortunately she hasn't realized it yet
Care to elaborate?
she thought i was cheating on her due to a slightly drunken night with a female friend that predates me knowing her
not too problematic, alcohol can lead to ugly outcomes
the problem was after that, she did absolutely nothing to fix the relationship, i went far beyond anything reasonable to prove to her that i had no intention of cheating and that i didn't cheat on her
if i ever have a real problem with her while married it will be game over for me
Would you guys ever date a 19 yr old if you're 32, noting she is a filo girl not white?
i would but i'm sure someone else would try to frick shit up
Date? No. Would let her think we're dating though. Non-whites ate just casual holes.
>15 years of lifting off and on
>one day tear rotator cuff
>never heals right
That's its for me. I always thought i'd be extra resilient in my late 30's/early 40's because of all my years of lifting, but no. all it took was not warming up enough and 125lbs bench to snap my shit up. now i'm worse off than most other men my age.
Idk if this is autism or I’m just hypersensitive to stuff but I fricking hate noise. I absolutely fricking hate certain sounds like styrofoam rubbing together or cardboard boxes being ripped, I hate hearing tape being pulled and cut.
It quite literally makes me go from relaxed normal to full alert and panicky. It overwhelms me, it send my heart rate to 120bpm. I hate certain noises so much.
I hate these sounds, I hate others too like when something occurs and some stupid b***h c**t thinks shrieking at the top of her lungs from the sidelines will help the situation in anyway. I hate when children scream in the same manor, often because they learned it form their mom. It makes me want to walk over and bakc hand the teeth out of someone’s mouth when that’s all they can do. Like you stupid fricking silly b***h, if you’re not helping the situation shut your fricking mouth. In what way, especially when other people are stepping in/already handling it, do you think standing there mouth agape and shrieking like a fricking lunatic will help? Are you that fricking helpless? Does it occur to you that if this is all you could do you would die in day one of shit hitting the fan? The most annoying part is that sometimes you’ll get to observe a “shreiker” quietly watch the situation, observe, and consciously decide “yeah, I better send out a top of my lungs glass shattering ear drum raping screech. That is what this situation needs, that will help the people already dealing with the situation focus harder”
I just hate loud sounds. Idk if it’s maybe my caffeine consumption putting me at an already heightened state easily pushed to the edge, or if I’m autistic or what. I don’t think I was always this sensitive to noises though, it seems to just get worse each year and I’m less and less patient to them. Too many noises and then I spend the day all fricking anxious and in a foul mood too paralyzed to focus on what I have to accomplish for the day. I hate it.
I am easily annoyed after I bust too many nuts to goyporn. Maybe thats it?
Tinder doesnt work for most guys it's not even their fault. You would have more chance finding women irl by pursuing activities that keeps new people coming into your circle. Anything.
You could be right, thinking about it basically all the problems I have gradually started to occur after I developed a porn and masturbation addiction. I mean busting 3-5 nuts is a slow day for me.
There’s also the fact that at the same time I developed nicotine and caffeine addictions as well, using way too much. I’ve been living in excess of these three things and all areas of my life have fallen to shit. I’ve been super on edge constantly. I think that I’ve known for a while I have to quit these to return back to my former, normal, self.
I am autistic and I hate all those sounds, plus random sensations like paper rubbing against my skin. You are probably autistic
Im in the same boat anon, i get unbeareably angry and sometimes i even get to the brink of crying, for me sudden loud sounds are the worst (like dog barks or someone honking their car horn).
I usually just close my eyes and breathe really deep and count slowly until i calm down, cause i know its moronic to get so worked up over it
I also know it’s stupid to get so worked up over something beyond my control, I generally do my best to keep it together and bottle up the anger and anxiety it causes me. But I wish I’d isn’t have this at all. There was a time I didn’t even react at all to noises even loud ones I never jumped or anything and at best got mildly annoyed, I want to be like that again.
I remember having a job next to the highway right off the exit where I had to frequently leave the building to do shit outside and people would heckle me. The heckling was one thing and often funny and in good nature, helped the day go by. But the amount of people who would honk to get my attention (also usually expecting me to run through traffic to come talk to them, I’m not doing that idgaf if we need the business). The honking was unbearable it always made me jump out of my skin. Occasionally I would be 5 feet from the road and a car would pull up right behind me and slam on their horn to get my attention when they only needed to crack the window and speak at a normal voice, I always told them to frick off I’m not offering them my business.
Then there were the nigs with subwoofers blasting whatever shitty song on max volume with the bass all the way up so that the song became distorted buzzing that shook all the surrounding buildings, I hated those people.
I don't know what the frick I am doing with my life. Have two job offers, one in Toronto and one in London. The London one pays $25k USD more and I already have friends that live there. If they were paying the same amount I would pick Toronto because I liked it when I visited and had much, much more success on the dating apps for some reason.
Still, the Toronto offer feels like its ripping me off and my quality of life will be a lot shittier. I'd be spending about 50% of my take home on rent vs 25%. Doesn't make sense to take it. I feel bad for Canadians, they seem to get shafted with salaries even worse than the Brits do
Take the London one. Sounds like a better deal overall. Job doing what?
i went from a 5 to a 7.5 in about two years and just can’t fathom that attractive women are actually into me. i don’t feel worthy of these girls and am nervous as frick around them. went on a date with this solid 8 who asked me out and she was clearly nervous too. making her laugh was easy but i couldn’t hold eye contact for a second when she was smiling at me, just this constant feeling of her being out of my league. sucks man.
>never had a relationship, hugged, or kissed a woman at the age of 22
>extended family has quit asking me if I’m talking to any girls
I guess I’ll take some whiskey, please
Part of the reason I didn’t go see my extended family for any holidays this year or any of the last is I have nothing to share.
>what have you been up to? How’s the firefighting?
I found out it wasn’t for me and I’m not someone who can be around sick/dying people a month on the job fricked me up and my courses didn’t prepare me to actually be the one in control of those patients it’s very different to be the student with 2 seasoned medics and a lieutenant VS actually being the lead medic. So I quit and I’ve been unemployed and neet since
>hey anon, I know we’ve asked every year we’ve seen you and we react awkwardly to make you feel shitty when you always say no, as if to insinuate something is wrong with you, but got a girlfriend yet?
Actually I did finally get a gf. Guess how that went? The first was a mentally ill prostitute with a huge body count who would hit me and cut herself and tell people I was abusing her aren’t you proud? I spent 5 years celibate after that experience, finally dated again, and the new b***h out right threatened that she would cheat on me haha so whacky right? Haha I love that you can only ever fricking ask about this and never seem to understand I don’t want to discuss this shit with you people haha please ask next year! I’m sure the answer will be no again! Maybe you’ll use your classic wording of “why don’t you ever bring a girlfriend to our holidays?” I always love that
>hey anon any hobbies!
Yeah I got a few! I have this super fun hobby where I sit in my room all day with the lights off switching between suicidal idealizations and edging for 6 hours straight. Sometimes I’ll play video games to escape reality. I’m so interesting haha…
I don’t got shit to share idk why they can only ask about the exact areas I’m fricking up in.
>see anon post about something that made him happy but no one itt knows/has pointed out it’s not exactly how he seems
>go to reply because I had direct experience doing that, telling him I’m happy for but [insert know it all BS pointing out why it wasn’t anything crazy that’s standard]
>decide to let him have this
I need to do better with this IRL. Keeping my mouth shut, not jumping on opportunities to be a know it all piece of shit. Part of the problem with why I’m like this is I spent a lot of my 20s with a friend who behaved like this except he was wrong every single time so I got into the habit of correcting him. The way he would do it was in a blatant “you’re dumb I’m right that means Im better than you are haha” kind of way, and he did it every chance he got often with subjects he knew nothing about. If anyone else pointed out critique or a correction, not even necessarily at him, and he was involved in the discussion he just had to jump in to basically say something to the effect of
>nah uh I actually went to college and I read that XYZ ABC and so you’re wrong
Or, if you did it to him he would stare at you like you were being the biggest butthole on the planet. Not even in the way he did it to everyone, just a simple “hey bro that’s actually my area of expertise it’s actually [ABC] it’s super interesting” like he just wanted to be the constant center of attention
Dude didn’t even fricking go to college like he says to leverage things he dropped out during the withdrawal period of his first semester because he couldn’t handle psych 101, computer literacy, and English 1101 at our local community college. The heaviest work load was literally the English course which included 4 essays in the entire semester. The dude was a dick and hanging with him made me become a dick too, I guess as a form of comparativeness towards him being this way. Ive been making an effort to fix myself while also trying to hang more around better people.
One of the biggest benefits of being too damn smart is leveraging it to talk to girls about everything. I can talk to nurses about medical stuff and hold my own, paras/lawyers about lawyer bullshit, other teachers/parents about kids etc. Still can't avoid getting love bombed and slaughtered. My tendency to prefer girls who like a struggle with a snuggle has a huge crossover with mental illness
What are some tips to look young? Covis took years off my life.
I live in small city of 18000 people which is 40km away from big city. When i check Tinder - most of girls are 20/30/40km away from me. So i suspect its not only quality of my pictures or how boring i am - most of girls my age simply does not see me at all because their filters are set to 10/20km away. So i barely get any matches when i get some, even with chubby girls, conversation dies out after few messages (maybe because i put too much effort in it and i talk about hobbies and ask her questions like a beta cuck instead of asking her for irl date right away - which i dont have motivation to do because she is again far away and i need to have good reason to drive 40km like person being really pretty and interesting)
>inb4 just move to big city
Right now there is inflation and big housing crisis in my country. I would probably need to spend >1/3 of my wage on rent alone and i still earn above average (which soon will be less and less impressive, maybe barely enough to survive given crazy inflation and generaly sorry state of the world). It simply does not make sense to move from purely economical perspective. I also got blackpilled from reading incel forums etc reading that chads get approached all the time and i was last year at hollidays in party cities or at some raves and no girls approached me, or their signs were too subtle. So i stopped believing that changing my location will change much in my life. But i guess chances woul be >0% if i moved out
>oh no 1/3rd income on rent
In my area 1/2th income going to rent is normal. It’s bad. Tinder still doesn’t work, only if you have your own place. Even then they’re all prostitutes anyways. At best is some 5/10 who still wants a proper date (lol, lmao even). For the most part the only actual options I get are fat girls with cute faces who if they lost the weight they’d be frickable, so just dick suck girls.
I think your mistake is obvious to you. As you said
>trying to give a shit about who they are, wanting to find an actual girlfriend
It’s tinder. Not only is that not what they’re there for, none of them are GF material. They’re prostitutes dude. You also gotta realize even with the ugliest b***hes there you’re competing with thousands of dudes at a time. A girl you meet IRL, you may be competing with 10-20 dudes. On tinder, it’s thousands.
It’s a degenerate app full of degenerate people. It’s not what you’re looking for. If you did get a GF through tinder congrats she’s been with 50+ dudes this year already.
The way tinder works is it’s a numbers game. You have to constantly be chatting up multiple women at a time trying to get hangouts immediately and take it off tinder right away until one works.
Other dating apps are no different.
You’re better off using your free time to socialize. Join clubs, join meet up groups. Continually do that shit and make your only goals to be to have fun and to network. Don’t even worry about meeting women. Network with everyone. Eventually you’ll meet a woman either in one of those groups or via someone you networked with.
Bro frick the dating apps especially in your circumstances. Just play the 3 second game, when ever you see a good looking woman just go and talk to her with in three seconds. Within 3 months it will become natural and you will go up to them with rizz up your sleeve.
Rejoining the gym after a one year hiatus.
Proud of you anon, what matters is coming back harder
I’ve found Christ for myself but feel unworthy. I have been doing bad at Uni, I haven’t been at the gym for months and I always relapse with masturbation.
I have to build gods kingdom but it’s so hard to stay focused clear minded and ambitious.
I need to motivate myself and keep my word bros, but it’s so hard
>I’ve found Christ for myself but feel unworthy
We all are. If St Paul says he's the chief of sinners, what does that say about me? Just trust in the Lord and cling to Him as much as you can. Self abuse and pornography is one of the greatest challenges young men have to fight against these days. Stay bold in your struggle and ask Christ for help and He will give it abundantly.
Didn’t go to thanksgiving, had a tummy ache. Feels GREAT.
>snacked on chips this morning instead of actually eating breakfast
>now demotivated to go to gym
Why am I like this
Bros how do I know if I can afford living on my own? Does it look like my budget is missing anything?
>rent
>gas (transportation)
>car ins
>phone bill & internet
>electricity & water
>food
>misc (shampoo, paper towels, toilet paper etc)
>health ins
I feel like I’m missing stuff. If I have over $20k saved and am saving a bit each month while paying all of these would you say I’m ready? I can’t even fricking jack off in my house while living at home I get no peace and quiet no privacy. Can’t bring b***hes over to get my dick sucked, which also means can’t really date, can’t bust a nut either on my own it’s been 3 fricking weeks I need to cum I’m about to drive to a rest stop on the highway and beat off in my car. I’m approaching 30 and I can’t even jack off.
Forgot to mention, parents are always home. I quite literally get zero time to be alone and by myself between work and being at home. I don’t just need that to beat off, I can’t truly destress and get my bearings together unless I have at least an hour all alone inside my house which rarely happens. I feel like I’m on eggshells around my own family just normally which doesn’t help this.
Can't help on your previous post but same anon. My mom is Bipolar, on meds but still doesn't 100% treat it so have to walk on eggshells around her. I've just resorted to barely speaking with her which is working well enough. But I desperately need some space without her around to destress, I WFH which doesn't help. Not easy living like this
It sucks dude. Work isn’t even part of it, like if I work and I’m around people for 8-12 hours, it’s just way worse by the time I’m home and still don’t get an empty house to just destress and reset. That actually makes me burn out basically right away, having zero alone time. I could always drive to an empty park or something and lay down in my car but it’s not even 1/4th the same effective as having a house to myself even just for an hour and it’s ridiculous to have to do that to continue to function.
Yesterday I did get the house to myself for a few hours. Within the first hour I felt great again, the rest of the time I was without even thinking to do it being productive. All shit I normally don’t get done until my parents are asleep. I meal prepped, did laundry, cleaned the kitchen did some dishes etc.
Idk why but being alone it’s just effortless for me to function normally I get shit done without having to make a list or thinking and forcing myself to do it. I’m more clear headed, focused, not stressed.
Living with parents it’s things that on paper seem like no big deal but when they happen multiple times a day nonstop it adds up fast. Shit like being questioned what I’m doing for ??? reason. Or my father wearing his shoes indoors and ever 5 minutes stomping down the hallway. Oddly enough the only time he isn’t being loud is when he takes his shoes off and sneaks up to my bedroom door and suddenly yells my full name
>“ANON ANONYMOUS!”
>what?
>Oh, sorry I just didn’t know where you were
This happens daily, I’m always where I always am. My room. Sometimes he’ll bang on my door when he does it too.
My mom, she just goes into my room at random times and tears it apart. Idk what she’s looking for.
Im 28 btw, this is ridiculous. I have no privacy and I’m treated like a child still
100% the same on being seemingly inexplicably productive and way less stressed when the house is empty. Dishes are done, room is tidy, work is caught up on, and everything just feels 100x better. All of a sudden I have energy to socialize again too. Good to know it's not just me. I'm 24, not quite your age but also old enough to need that space. Hang in there anon. ik it's not easy
Don’t frick up like I did, keep working hard. You’ll be able to move out earlier than me. It’s gonna take me another 1-2 maybe even 3 years to leave.
Also the most ironic part of this to me, the most anxiety inducing part, is if I had my own place it would actually drive me to be closer with my family again.
my dad is bipolar, takes meds for it, and i still have to resort to barely speaking to him. people who didnt live with us dont know that he has really bad bipolar, and always thought we had a great family with no problems. i suppose they never saw him punching holes in the wall or threatening to shoot himself in front of me when i was really young. those things dont really bother me now, but i would never let him be alone with my kids when/if i have kids
The best part is to everyone outside the family, they seem completely normal, so no one in your community will ever really understand what you went through. Think you'll be able to forgive him? I'm still trying to decide if I even want to
expect the unexpected, they say always have at least 6 months of savings
Got it. That’s not a bad idea. I’ll take it a step further and have 12 months. Going to save a bit longer, run my numbers again and make sure I can also be growing what I have saved when I move out just for further reassurance.
well that's what they say, my actual advice is you'll find a way through whatever circumstances, you just have to bite the bullet
soon after I first moved out I squatted in my shitty rental for 2 months while it was renovated, showering at work, creating stupid videos on a laptop to pass the time without power or electricity, and I still look back on that time fondly
Hook up with your dates at their place. Or airbnb.
Update on this b***h. So I arranged to see her today for just a few hours and she cancelled AGAIN siting her dog as the reason. I should just ignore her now until she makes some effort towards me right?
i don’t know the history but i would discard her at this point unless she’s coming over to my place. ball is in her court yeah don’t entertain her anymore, no texting or whatever. remember, if she really wanted to, she would. you’re the prize homie
>she cancelled AGAIN siting her dog as the reason
Was this before or after what's going on in the chat? Because she's clearly offering you multiple different chances to hang out AND showing consideration for your work schedule. You'd need terminal 'tism to frick this one up.
I arranged to see her after those messages, for today. She cancelled again
"Next sat" it is then. CALL HER and talk about it, agree on a time and place you 100% know that you can make.
Makes it feel more real.
Stop wasting your time anon. You are worth more than her.
Drop her 100%. My guess is she has a very with one of her girls too see how many times she can frick you over before you ghost her. Women do this type shit basically every day. Literally delete her number and the conversation and don't text her every again
Looks like she's making an effort and us offering several times to reschedule. Maybe you should stop being a sociopathic narcissitic little homosexual and stop expecting people to bend down to you. What are you worth? What are you offering oh mighty god?
where and how do i find a gf equally as autistic as me
I could tell you but I don’t want my secret to become mainstream until I’ve been able to put into practice enough to find a worthwhile GF who I can marry.
Actually frick it it’s well known enough: conventions.
frick i should have gotten into anime but i can’t enjoy it
I can only enjoy a few anime. I hate reading manga usually too.
Most new animes that are the style I enjoy are basically just : naruto if he was in a magic user world.
Black clover, juihitsu Kaisen (which is simultaneously a demon slayer rip off), etc etc.
It wouldn’t hurt you to have some limited base knowledge of other animes (like the characters and general summary of the series) and only have a few you actually enjoy for the sake of the method I gave you. There’s also plenty of vidya cosplays if you’re into that, many Elden ring ones this year.
Beware though, cons are a crawling ground for Ethots too. Don’t date an Ethot one I met in college who I’ve watched spiral further down over the years is full blown onlyfans/foot porn (peeling bananas for some old fat guy to eat off her toes), and she just got into a 4 way relationship with 2 dudes and another woman. You should know pretty fast or easily if she’s an ethot though
Anime conventions
Myhomie
To elaborate:
Go to a convention and observe everyone. You will notice how most men there are. Thats your competition. Obviously theres normal dudes but they’re a minority compared to the mostly fat morons. Simply being a non fat moron around fat moron neckbeards makes you look better.
>don’t be in their face with physique
Autistic b***hes are still women and like an attractive guy, they can be more intimidated though. So dont be all chest puffed out and flexing, don’t cosplay as a character with fitness ties like goku. Be normal, but look good, just try to make it look effortless.
>what to say
You have an easy in. Discuss their costume. Say you like it/it’s the best you’ve seen, ask them questions like how they made it what materials they used. Talk about the anime/manga/video game (common ground). If they’re feeling you, progress and get their number. Don’t talk for too long unless you two are legitimately vibing and truly enjoying talking to each other.
You can even be a bit of an autist and when you text her quote the anime/manga. She wont forget you if you were in costume and just mention who you were, or usually if she sa genuine autist she likely rarely gives her # out and will remember you you may not need to cosplay
>how I realized this
I was at a con and overheard 3 fat neckbeard a trying to pick up some cosplay thots and they decided to, in gruesome vivid detail, discuss the berserk eclipse events, and as the women became obviously and visually uncomfortable they just kept going and going. I stepped in to change the subject and said “haha bro you like berserk? I love berserk! Whats your favorite arc?” And then left when they stopped talking about the rape scene. The girls stared, HARD and I was just in normal clothing. But that is what youre mostly up against, socially moronic fat frick slobs with zero game. The average ISTizen should be able to easily have easy pickings utilizing this info.
In the words of Sam Hyde
>You don’t want a GF, you want a man with autism
Girl autism is very different to boy autism.
This
I had an autistic gf. That meant watching nothing but Supernatural and Torchwood on repeat all day every day, eating godawful food she'd make that was just pasta with random spices/powders she got from the local organic grocery store (I'm talking like turmeric, ashwaganda, and coffee onions spaghetti), and spending 2 hours every day rearranging the furniture in her room.
It was a true test in patience. I just want a girl who will watch Godzilla movies and go for walks with me.
It's worse if they're aware of it. If they actively embrace the idea that they're autistic, they will use it as an excuse for all of their obnoxious behavior and refuse to do anything about it. And god help you if YOU have autism, because she will absolutely find your quirks and habits to be irritating and constantly yell at you for them.
I saw a video today of two autists, they were about 16-18. Guy and girl. They were several autistic like non functional. The girl had on earphones to combat noise issues I guess, the guy would do autist shit with his hands like cover his mouth randomly. The guy got overly excited and started moaning/grunting along to the song that was playing.
But every couple seconds the guy would turn to the girl and they would touch noses and any time he looked at her she genuinely smile and look at him in… in such a fantastical way. Like she adored him. Both just as autistic. Genuinely seemed like love… and I will never experience that…
Edit found it, picrel if anyone wants to go watch it.
there’s definitely a middle ground, not all autistic girls will be like you described. my ex was really into reading, photography, gaming and board games. also very shy and socially awkward, disliked clubbing and parties. they are out there, i promise
I can relate to these comments, my ex is autistic, like actually diagnosed as being on the spectrum in high school. She's really intelligent and works in tech making good money. She's also very sweet which is very important to me. As an additional bonus she's really naturally pretty and gifted genetically.
I thought I'd hit the lottery with her, but as time went on the shine wore off. She talks in this weird monotone voice with very little inflection, and her posture is very stiff just like her tone. She's really awkward and shy, which was cute at first, but it gets old fast. I would introduce her to friends or bring her out in social situations and she'd be so awkward that my friends would look at me like "wtf". They never made fun of her while we were dating but when I broke up with her they would mock her, maybe to make me feel better but still.
Oh yeah and she's completely naive and socially clueless. Since she had large perky breasts and was very fit, as well as being really pretty, she would get hit on all the time. The guys walking up to her randomly weren't usually a problem since she understood their intent, but the people in her social circles (she cosplayed and went to anime and video game cons) constantly hitting on her was exhausting since she genuinely thought they wanted to just be friends.
Got sick of constantly having to explain to her that no, Timmy from animecon isn't inviting you over to his house to just "help with his costume", he's trying to make a move on you. I think she genuinely never understood the subtext here. Eventually I realized it wasn't worth the stress. Not to mention I would imagine her at my wedding, when I introduce her to my family they would probably judge her for her weird mannerisms and then laugh at me behind my back.
need a gym gf but am manlet and only like tall chicks
I know that the right thing to do is to move on and focus on improving my life, but it eats at me that the people who hurt me will get away with it. I want them to suffer. It wouldn't fix anything but it would even the scales.
>It wouldn't fix anything but it would even the scales
nope, the damage is done, let go
I've been divorced for 11 months. Every day is still so fricking difficult bros. I no longer have a purpose in life and if things don't start getting better I'll probably kms
I know there are people worse of than me who haven't killed themselves yet. What the frick is driving them day-to-day? What's keeping (You) alive anon?
Pure spite honestly. I don't want these buttholes to outlive me and I hate myself too much to give up struggling and sleep for the rest of time. However, I'd be lying if I said that there wasn't a small glimpse of hope inside of me that makes me think it might get better in the future.
>I know there are people worse of than me who haven't killed themselves yet. What the frick is driving them day-to-day? What's keeping (You) alive anon?
There's literally nothing keeping me alive besides my own fear of actually having to kill myself. I'm completely miserable, I've been so for 10-15 years. My life is so pathetic that people wouldn't even belive it if I wrote about it. No friends, no relationships, no career, barely any hobbies that I wouldn't miss if I was dead, barely a relatiosnhip with my family, no goals for a family, house, retirement, nothing.
Motorcycle, 105k a year job, being in my late twenties with a house. I wouldn't recommend a house alone though, 1800 sqft feels pretty lonely but whatever. Was in a fraternity during university and had lots of random sex but now I am looking for something real. Frick it all bro
Jack and Coke, thanks. Same shit different day bros. Depression is definitely hitting harder along with the growing sense of isolation and loneliness. I have no friends, no social life, no romantic options, but at least I have my gains right? I'm getting tired of college, work, and the gym. I'm just so tired bros, there's so much to do but so little time. I just want to be done with it all, I'm tired of feeling like this but it doesn't seem like it'll get better. I know my attitude isn't helping but it's getting more and more difficult to keep these thoughts at bay.
Tough love: life gets worse, not better, after college. Join some clubs and meet people. Even if you're a total sperg there's clubs that will accept you.
Also jack and coke is for sorority girls.
Thinking of cutting off family but unsure if it’s worth it. AGAINST: they’re quite wealthy and might provide me with 15-20k per year for the next two years to pay for my tuition. FOR: constant negativity, extremely poor advice. I see them 1-3 times per year and the only good times are the first 45 minutes of conversation.
Current strategy is to smile and nod and perform my minimum role so they pay my tuition until I’m done school. After that turn away for ever. I don’t think it’s worth sticking around for inheritance since both parents have said they’ll make sure there’s none left when they die, or if there is my mom will be putting it towards restoring a Scottish castle. I’m in the Midwest and they’re out east so it should be pretty easy to go my own way.
Anyone have a similar situation?
Dude you only see them a few times a year. I thought you were going to say you live with them still and wanted to just move out and cut them because they were abusive or something.
Man up. I don’t say that to be a dick, but man the frick up. You can put up with a few hours per year of being overwhelmed and annoyed for the sake of maintaining family relations and if they’re willing to help you pay tuition.
You sound spoiled dude, like a brat. And I’m saying that because I wouldn’t be trying to help you if I didn’t, this is what you need to hear whether you like it or not. There are anons with far worst gmail situations than yourself. Last weekend an anon posted about how his father started being verbally abusive to his former addict brother and drove him to relapse, tried to threaten anon, yet they’re fricked because they’re still stuck living there.
I live with my dad and I cannot stand it. I was basically neglected ages 8-20 by him while he prioritized his GF and her daughter form her previous marriage and starved my dog then gave it to the shelter to be put to sleep while I lived at my moms house. He didn’t even pay my mom child support. I still love him, he’s expressed regret on his own accord and has been trying to put in a conscious effort to make things right so we have some semblance of a relationship again. There’s shit I can never forgive, I can’t be in the same room as him beyond a minute without panic attacks but for fricks sake I’m grateful for the support I have now.
I tell you all this hoping you do better, not to guilt you or be a c**t. Maybe you left things out but form the context you sound spoiled and entitled and selfish. Families are annoying, suck it up.
Well I’d be inclined to ask you in this situation, how did you turn things around with your dad, and what has made that effort worthwhile? Also what would you advise me to do in this situation? It’s not as though I haven’t tried most things that I imagine you would suggest. Also you are correct- it is quite kind of them to provide me with money, and foolish of me not to grateful.
Would you advise to try to rectify this situation by attempting to Jordan Peterson the situation and discuss it in depth with them? Or just perform my duties as a member of the family to a mechanical minimum and leave it with that.
>how did you
Purely because he, all on his own, has expressed genuine and sincere guilt and regret and acknowledged how it probably fricked me up and made me the non normal person with the issues I have to still resolve that I am. I’m still not even comfortable around him. But because of that I can forgive.
Maybe it’s just me but accountability is a big deal for me. I have always put my best effort to take accountability for my actions, at times in the past to a fault (taking account anywhere I wasn’t in the wrong). No one, or rather so very few people are able to do this. It’s horse shit. Nothing makes me angrier and more untrusting towards someone than them not being able to take accountability and admit they fricked up all on their own.
I don’t think he even knows this about me and the fact he did this was a big deal to me. I’ve dumped women over them not being able to take accountability or own frick ups, or even acknowledge them.
But even then, things haven’t fully been made right. All I want to do now is finish improving and fix some of my issues, move out and show him I’m capable and will survive in this world. I’ve forgiven him, idk that we will ever be as close as we were when I was a child. But if I can at least get my shit most of the way tighter before he passes, that’s all I want.
>would you advise
Idk. From what you posted idk that you have anything to rectify. Your family is obnoxious, that isn’t unique to you. I know it can suck but most families are annoying and even unbearable. You deal with it anyways because they love you. They’re all you have at the end of the day, even if at times they may seem selfish or weird in their choices. Don’t make yourself unhappy, but yeah at the very least to the minimum. It wouldn’t hurt to call your parents occasionally just to say hi and tell them how things have been, even about lifting if you want.
Oh and I forgot to mention in my other post but I agree with this anon
that is shitty of them, frick a Scottish castle. But still, that is their choice and their money. Irresponsible and arguably immature/virtue signal-ish, flat out lame and gay if I may be so frank, but their choice. And yet I still don’t think it’s enough reason to cut them off especially if they’ve otherwise been good to you despite being annoying and offering bad advice. It is what it is, they’re family and they’re not abusive or shitty so you deal with them. That’s part of being a man
>both parents have said they’ll make sure there’s none left when they die,
thats incredibly shitty on their part since there wont be any resources for the next generations, but i dont think you have enough reason to cut them off yet.
ill put in terms that will sound better to you. if you have kids, you can talk your parents into investing more of their money into you and your kids so they can see your family succeed. you getting married will make them change. ive never been in a relationship, but ive observed it happening with quite a few families.
Man my parents treated me like shit and I still fly out to see them once a year.
You dont have to deal with them barely at all, cutting them off would just be an act of revenge that wont make you feel better. It sounds like youre in a fine spot, I don't let my parents pay for shit though because frick being reliant on those sociopaths. I'll go my own path and then show up to their house to read manga for a week every Christmas. I don't give a frick.
>trying to hang out with friend I rarely get to see these days
>our schedules never match up
Being in your 30s is a such a meme.
Just a couple days on dating apps and I already feel like a kazakh. I refuse to believe that the average woman was so lazy, crass and entitled during most of human existence.
I hope I get a job soon. Being out of work for like half a year is incredibly demoralizing. I can't do any of the shit I want to do because I don't have the cash to cushion the fall, and I want to save up for a house. I want a dog, I want kids, I want a new car, I want to just be able to relate to people going to events because they don't have to worry about budgeting.
Frick man.
Why not do min wage work?
I mean, I'll have to at some point if my unemployment runs out, but that's a last-ditch option for me. I was making 85k a year so I really don't want to halve my income if there's a better option
The main reason I'm out of work is because strikes shut my entire industry down and the job market dried up entirely. The strikes got resolved and I'm just waiting for production to get back underway.
work for UPS they make moronic money
Not really my industry, it'd be very difficult to transition to that. I doubt new drivers make that much and probably work hellish schedules, particularly in a big city like mine.
aren't they all unionized anyway?
idk my friend from high school is making 80k or so and he hasn't been there that long, they got large raises after the recent strikes I guess
Do you also call the guy who your fat frick girlfriend slopped off in your mothers apartment “friend”? I’m just curious lol
>the guy who your fat frick girlfriend slopped off in your mothers apartment
what they dont tell you is that you have to go work in one of their distribution centers before getting a chance at being a driver. good luck not getting let go during the weeks where they randomly decide they cant afford the extra people on staff because they randomly do that shit to the DC workers
Same shit except it’s been closer to 2 years. I’ve begun applying to
non wage retail jobs. I want anything, anything that gets me out of the house and back on a structured schedule of some sort while earning some type of income. I’m getting ready to just work 2-3 retail jobs all of 2024 if I have to.
My hope is that by filling the gap in employment it then becomes easier to get into a better job.
I want all the same shit as you man. I have a plan but it cannot start until I accomplish step 1 which is any job.
>either land electric a helper/apprenticeship for electrician, OR get some retail jobs
>first year working again israelite my way to having over $20k saved again
>if I get into apprenticeship, save for another 6-12 months, move out once pay is better
>if I have the free time get a dog, probably a breed that can be alone for 8 hours a day
>by year 3 take a week off to take a small vacation (bringing my dog with me if I have one)
>finsih up apprenticeship, upgrade to better apartment, hopefully have met a GF at this point and it gets serious enough she moves in, if no dog get dog now
And form there it should be easier and easier to accomplish the next goals like buying a house or leaving this state
damn man, sorry to hear that. Shit's rough. Just a minor note though, if you need a breed that's okay with being alone you probably shouldn't get a dog. Dogs are incredibly social and most don't do well alone. I'd wait until you can work from home or take your dog with you.
I know man, I plan to do all my research. I want to get one from a shelter so I likely won’t be able to just pick a breed. I do think most adult dogs would be chill for 8 hours, especially if I’m getting home at around 2pm. Plus I would spend all the time outside of work I had with it. But honestly it still doesn’t sound like a good idea to me. That’s why I included the possibility of just waiting until I had a GF who lived with me, assuming she didn’t work or she worked from home.
Oh well, when the time comes I either get one because I determine I can or I don’t.
I'm a high functioning agoraphobe. I still lift 6 times a week and I got to the office 3 times a week. but I have to take a lunchbox with icepacks with me wherever I go to calm me down if I start panicking. lately I've been great and never have to use them, but now its gotten to the point where I can't function normally without them as a security measure and I feel pathetic. I went to the gym today and I was in a great mood so I forgot to take them with me. and then I got there and realized I didn't have them and it felt like I was almost stranded. got back home without incident but I feel fricking pathetic bros. its like a big reminder that I'm not fricking normal and now I'm starting to wonder if I'll ever be normal again. just started 3 years ago after I had a medical incident and started being afraid of death
got a cute 19 year old girl writing with me and she’s actually crazy after me.
I’m much older than her also pretty hot but I don’t feel anything…
I think I’m dead inside it was the same in my last relationship. Woman do say I look attractive but damn I don’t feel anything .
Anyone here who has/had the same experience?
Any Tipps?
>tfw no gf
>people tell me to do online dating
>so autistic that I literally cannot form any sort of connection with somebody unless I have met them first
>to me people online are just ghosts lost in the ether who I barely register as humans
>might as well all just be bots shitposting on the net
>no desire to meet any of these people because I have no pre-established connection with them
>cannot make that connection online
>doesn't stop people shouting "try online dating" like it's a fricking panacea or some shit
I will never understand people who say "dating is a numbers game, you've got to ask out thousands to even get one date and go on thousands of dates to get one relationship". That shit sounds exhausting and it also treats people as disposable and interchangeable which just feels so wrong. Doesn't stop them calling me a psychopath when I don't weep tears over every child BTFO in a warzone.
well yeah what do you expect? No one makes emotional connections via chat and very few of them come to real life meetups. that's why the first date is where you make the connection.
But I have no desire to go on a date with somebody I have no sort of emotional connection with, and such an emotional connection cannot be gained online.
To put it another way: the most attractive woman on Earth could walk into my room right now and ask me on a date, and I'd certainly respond with "no way gay". If she tried the same thing in two or three weeks after we'd had many in-person encounters, the answer would probably be different.
Look man you can either throw a fit that things aren't the way you'd prefer or adapt learn the new way. Sink or swim.
I'd much rather recreate the ending of Deus Ex where JC Dentreat destroys the entire internet.
The information revolution and its consequences have been a disaster for the human race.
gl with that i guess
Have you ever noticed how people who feel themselves stuck in hopeless situations have these grand delusions about doing unrealistic shit while completely neglecting the simple things they could do?
Basically, go take a shower homie.
I felt the same way but 1% effort is better than 0%, I may have no gf but now I can say it's my choice, I went on 3 of my first dates this year and I'm 29
I couldn't care less what they say about The Office or some other show but if you're bored just stop messaging them, you may come across another autist that brings up something you actually care about and then the conversation flows naturally
>protip: screen for personality by matching for girls with unflatterring photos and no visible friends, they're your autists
>>so autistic that I literally cannot form any sort of connection with somebody unless I have met them first
>to me people online are just ghosts lost in the ether who I barely register as humans
>might as well all just be bots shitposting on the net
>no desire to meet any of these people because I have no pre-established connection with them
>cannot make that connection online
>doesn't stop people shouting "try online dating" like it's a fricking panacea or some shit
I feel the same exact way. There’s zero desire to me to even try, and when I have forced it and tried it doesn’t work, likely because it’s not genuine. There’s like 20% of me that also views them all as stupid prostitutes essentially in a frick catalogue, because that’s what online dating essentially is. But other than that 20% same shit. I’m not even comfortable around a woman unless I’ve been acquainted in some way and seen her regularly on a consistent or semi consistent basis in some (preferably via mutual friends) setting. That’s how I’ve gotten the lays I have had.
Its so bad for me I have to rely on scumbag tactics to even get a GF and sleep with them first so I have comfort going on a date with them which as you can imagine often results in a shitty relationship. Thats something I think I can at least fix and stop doing, just full on sperg on a real date be anxious and uncomfortable and make a fool of myself struggling to look in her eyes stuttering as I tell her my couple stupid interests/hobbies which she isn’t going to relate to.
But as far as seeing a woman I match with on a dating app as real? That is not changing. Even if the stars aligned and I went on a date with one, date went well we started dating super compatible and make it official, Im not going to want to date her because she was on a dating app and I’ll never believe she wasn’t getting ran through. So no matter what just not human. I dont even want to date a girl I met IRL who at any point had one
>Doesn't stop them calling me a psychopath
Autism isn't preventing you from not fricking, you edgelord homosexual.
Anyone have experience getting microneedling/laser treatment for old acne scars? In my looksmaxxing phase and wanting to clean up some of my more ghoulish features
Iq is cope
Vodka and a diet coke.
I hate how self-negligent depression had made me. Trying to eat better and exercise again but progress is slow given that my bmi was lower than that of the average holocaust survivor. God I wish I hadn't wasted over a year rotting in bed
What do you do about a gf who keeps insisting you need therapy and that therapy always works and is worth the money despite much reasonable criticism
Do you want her to still be your gf? Then try therapy, and if nothing improves, just tell her that it didn't work and you don't want to spend money on it. If you don't care if she breaks up with you then refuse.
I want to believe that I'll some day feel normal human connection and experience something that resembles a normal human relationship, and what I have with her is the closest I've ever felt to that, so I'm interested in preserving it despite our issues. That being said, my mind seems made up about the entire field of psychiatry in general. I keep trying to convince myself that paying $70 once a week to rant to a stranger will help me be less hurt about things that happened in my childhood, knowing how ridiculous the idea sounds on its face
She thinks I'm "mentally unwell" and "not normal" (I'm not, but I don't see the issue, it works for me) but wants a passionate relationship regardless. I've tried to explain to her that I'm willing to try, and that's only because she's the first person I've felt an ounce of love for, but that I may simply be too weird and unfixable to be a good partner. She doesn't seem to understand my concern, she doesn't seem able to consider the possibility that therapy doesn't magically fix everything
Care to extrapolate? I'm honestly here all day
Basically what's been rolling around my mind, but I want to consider all options
a therapist isn't a psychiatrist. A therapist doesn't diagnose anything wrong with your brain: it's just an outlet to vent.
> she doesn't seem able to consider the possibility that therapy doesn't magically fix everything
From her perspective she probably thinks the same thing about you assuming therapy couldn't possibly work.
>A therapist doesn't diagnose anything wrong with your brain: it's just an outlet to vent.
That's the thing, though. I don't see how an outlet to vent would help me. I've never needed it before. I enjoy keeping things to myself and preserving my own little internal world. If I trusted psychiatrists and genuinely believed "mental illness" was a real thing, I'd just go straight to a psychiatrist and fix whatever is up there. I don't see my traits or behaviors as worth worrying about, nor do they affect others, but she seems to have an issue with the way I am because she wants me to "be normal"... I don't see why she wants to be with the more I think about it
>From her perspective she probably thinks the same thing about you assuming therapy couldn't possibly work.
I was shuffled between various therapists / psychiatrists from the age of 9 to 12. Those experiences soured my impression of the entire idea. If I'd bitten into 1,000 apples in my life and they tasted bad each time, you'd struggle to convince me that the apple 1,001 will actually taste totally fine bro. She's completely unwilling to accept even the slightest ideological criticism of psychiatry, she says it's "conspiratorial", as if it's not based off of my own life experience
have you told her your experience with them as a kid?
I have. She was understanding and felt bad that I'd had negative experiences with it, but when I explained what my situation was like at the time (socially inept autist preteen, shit home life, bullied at school) she attributed the negativity to my parents and school-age peers, not to therapy, even though the medical professionals blamed me for the issues and actively made my life worse at the time. She's not completely dismissive of how I feel, maybe I exaggerate, but her and I have very different approaches to mental health and I'm making concessions for her that I wouldn't normally make for anyone (my first appointment was last week, next one in two days)
Thank you for the perspective, I appreciate it
>the therapy wasn't shitty bro, your context was
Has your gf ever studied psychology or thought about becoming a therapist? That's a serious question btw. Women who are dogmatic about psychology usually have a narcissistic relationship with it.
Not from what I can tell. She had some sort of moderate "depression" phase in her teenage years and it got "cured" by a few therapy sessions (paid for by her extremely supportive normie family who are loaded) and she thinks she has ADHD now. I think she sort of worships therapy because of that.
She might have ADHD, I really have no opinion either way. I see people's traits and behaviors as simply an aspect of who they are, not symptoms of something supposedly wrong with them. She's messy and unorganized but I've never hounded her about it or told her that she's mentally ill and needs therapy to change herself. I accept that as part of who she is (at least, who she currently is) and as something I'm willing to tolerate if I want to live with her. I've never tried to make her change in the way she wants me to change. If her behavior came to be a dealbreaker for me, I wouldn't tell her that she needs to change to become what I want, I would just leave.
>I see people's traits and behaviors as simply an aspect of who they are, not symptoms of something supposedly wrong with them.
Pathologizing behaviors is all the rage nowadays. Anyway, it's clear that you expect her to treat you the way you treat her. You've to understand that she may be unwilling or even incapable of doing so. Going by your posts I would say that's the case but you're the one who knows her best. The real question is if that's a deal breaker to you or not.
Oh, if you do break up be prepared for her to rationalize that as you being unable to face your issues. Women love to project their faults externally and she'll never admit that her behavior is what made you call it quits.
Thanks man, I do appreciate it
Bad therapy creates internalized structures that prevent further therapy from working. You will now assume all therapy if of poor quality, and it will be nigh on impossible for people to convince you otherwise until you decide to put your faith into another person and open up again. So yeah,, therapy won't ever work with you. Something that can potentially work in spite of this is psychedelic use. If you are interested I can explain (in medical terms) how it affects the brain and why its got a novel and strong possibility to fix treatment resistant therapy cases.
>Something that can potentially work in spite of this is psychedelic use
you too can be the next connor murphy!
I'm not sure his issue but psychedelics are an extremely broad range of novel solutions. Psilocin is the strongest contender for treating poor thinking since it shuts off the "default mode network" which is quite literally the Freudian ego. It acts as the conductor that operates the machinery within your neural network. It keeps track of what connections need to be made at what time. This is where treatment resistant depression comes in. SSRIs can only "treat" mood but it doesn't solve the underlying infectious neural network that upregulates and boosts the shitty things crawling through our head. You get blasted on psilocin? That is the only part of the brain turned off, now you have true free will in the sense every part of your brain can speak to each other. Allowing you to make "new" connections and those effects are long lasting. Currently John Hopkins is trying to develope a talk therapy protocol to provide therapists with to use with patients in conjunction with psychedelic use.
Nta but is it wise to use shrooms continually, constantly even?
I have had like 4 trips. First three I took too much, also smoked weed with two of those which made it stronger. All became bad trips at one point, or I got very paranoid and anxious. The last one however I only took 1.5g and did not smoke weed and I had a realization : I need to learn to exercise a healthy amount of ego. I need to stop being a yes man to everyone, to stop putting everyone’s needs and wants before my needs. I need to not just focus on what’s best for me to climb out of my depression but genuinely put myself first going forward, to first only consider what benefits me and brings me value and happiness, then second I can consider how it affects others.
Like I was way too empathetic previously and couldn’t say no usually. Previously I first considered how my actions and what I did affected other people and seldom considered how they benefited me at all. It was like I had no healthy sense of ego.
I worry, would continual trips, like one every set amount of time (weekly, bi weekly, monthly, etc) help or potentially mess things up? Because I like the conclusion I came to and I’ve been doing pretty well after that.
Tolerance supposedly wears off after two weeks even on large trips. I'm in a weird stage where tolerance should have worn off on me but I still can't trip. Chewed 5g and barely felt it this past week. Going to wait until New years before trying again. Regarding your self image. No comment, that's your self image.
Nothing is what I'd do about it
Dump her, im unfixable frick these hoes trying to fix me.
Read her this post I made shit talking therapy about a month ago
>I don't like how unstable people who do therapy sound. It's always "today gave me a lot to talk about with my therapist" or "thank God I've therapy two days from now". Does that sound like a mentally stable person or like someone who's a few bad dice rolls away from crumbling? I'm not saying you shouldn't talk with others about your problems but considering yourself someone who takes care of his mental health because you became dependant on paying a stranger to hear you talk once a week is absolutely delusional; especially when you consider how these same people usually look down on those who don't do therapy.
>"Oh, John is a real piece of work. He walks around moping about his issues and letting them frick up his head. Not like me though. Everything is fine and dandy as long as I keep paying doctor Lipschitz to hear me b***h about life and pretend to give a frick."
>That doesn't sound pathological to you?
your entire tirade falls apart at
>considering yourself someone who takes care of his mental health
because someone in therapy knows they need help with their mental health, dolt. also nice bit of antisemitism there kek. poltrash loves their spergouts
>because someone in therapy knows they need help with their mental health
Therapy goers treat that shit like the mental equivalent of taking a shower. For them doing therapy is taking care of their mental health. The most extreme do believe those who don't do therapy to be the mental equivalent of a smelly hobo.
Btw Lipschitz was the name of the therapist from the Rugrats you politically lobotomized c**t.
That's pretty normal these days for women to go to therapy and push their partners into it. Rejoice because it means you probably have a quality girl. Also rejoice because she clearly cares enough about you to insist you go to therapy.
Go to therapy. Try it out. It could change your life.
I don't want to sound like a b***h, but I've lost my creative spark and I don't know how to get it back. I used to draw, write, film videos and want to do these big things. Now? There's nothing there. Just, go to work, pay bills, etc. I'm mundane.
I was gonna say it could be technology and consuming but seems like maybe your just burnt out. Work also probably leaves you pretty drained. You have to make time for it maybe doing a little bit daily or on weekends.
damn what a banger
Frick it, I'll bite, mostly because I really don't like writing in a journal, and also because I like it when I feel like someone is listening to my problems.
I'm fat, but of course I am, my dumbass has been fat all my life, with my lowest weight being in Highschool when I was counting my calories, had a Weights and Conditioning class, and had someone else cooking for me.
I gained all my weight after my only girlfriend dumped me, I fell into a deep depression, that I never recovered from because my support systems were non-existent, so I internalized all the hatred I felt for her, and inflicted it upon myself. This coping method caused me to throw opportunity after opportunity under the bus before eventually getting to where I am now, friendless, girlfriendless, fat, and working a job as a stocker at a grocery store.
I have no incentive to actually go out and try to meet anyone, because I live in the middle of asscrack nowhere, Michigan, where basically every chick who would have been available has moved away from this shithole, is already getting married, or is already in a relationship, and the other guys my age are more interested in getting on that 60hr workweek grindset to afford whatever it is, or are focused on their own pursuits or partners.
So, here I am, plagued by my memories of Highschool, which was the best time of my life, with a partial IT degree, haunted by memories of an old life.
It's looking way better ever since I stopped taking fricking Zoloft, but it's still not the best.
I want to lose nearly 100lbs as fast as possible as I want to join some branch of the military to pay off my school debts, have a job in a more interesting field, have structure in my life, and get out of this shithole, but my fatass just LOVES stuffing his face full of whatever junk I can get my hands on.
I'd love to do rolling 24hrs to fast the weight off, but I don't have the mental discipline to deal with it, and I don't know how to develop that.
Discipline has to be developed like anything else. You know what you need to do, and you know how to do it. That's good.
Now you need to do it.
Rolling 24 hour fasts aren't going to work right now because you're undisciplined, but could you do a single 24 hour fast this week? Yeah, easily. Do that.
If you're 100 pounds overweight, then you're definitely eating or drinking shit that you shouldn't be. Stop that immediately. Go dump the last of your soda and snacks into the toilet. You can do that now before you have a chance to talk yourself out of it, no willpower required.
Don't expect to unfrick yourself in one stroke of Herculean effort. It doesn't work that way. One thing that's been helping me lately is to write a checklist in my notebook before i go to bed of the things i need to get accomplished the next day. Seeing boxes unchecked is a good way to keep yourself accountable.
You can do it, man. But you have to actually do it.
I've started counting calories. LoseIt. The past couple of days have really been eye opening for how fricked my eating has been. What I assumed was normal portion sizes were fricking massive. I mostly avoid soda now, and now I will start to focus on not eating like a lard, and excepting that I will be hungry.
I counted calories once before, it's how I lost the weight the first time, and now I am going to do it again. I thought I didn't need to do it, but after seeing even the past three days I am angry with myself, as that could have been so many months saved had I just started when I got off the meds.
The plan was to be a Healthy weight by December, after my 6 month cleanse period was over so I could just join the Airforce then, but I chuffed it. I'll get there. I need to
You'll do it.
Also, no "mostly avoiding soda". You don't drink soda now. You don't drink alcohol either.
My amazing perfect tomboy gf of over a year now just ‘came out’ to me today as ‘nonbinary’ and wants to use They/Them pronouns. I’m pretty fricking torn up over it because I know I’m going to have to break up with her over it, I have absolutely 0 respect for this pronoun shit. She’s so fricking perfect though bros, super cute, super outdoorsy, surprisingly strong and we wrestle all the time. I really love her, we were working on plans to move out of state together after graduation and I really thought I’d finally found the one. Fricking genderspecials ruin absolutely fricking everything I’m furious.
>yea that pronoun shit is cringe af. Well sounds like you have a decision personally it depends on how far gone gf is. Idk if politics are different its usually fine but if its unavoidable like pronouns then it may be an L.
oops didn't mean to greentext
Good morning sir
On the plus side; every time you have sex will be a threesome.
I mean talk to her about it, maybe she will instantly mature , but yeah, RIP
Don't dump her over it, berate her until she knocks it off or leaves. Women are moronic and malleable. This is a good thing. You need to enforce your will on her. If she respects you, she will eventually adopt all of your major opinions.
>t. Wife was president of some gay group in high school, now hates homos and Black folk.
You think it matters what she calls herself moron? If a teapot says it wants to be a cutting board it’s still a fricking teapot. Literally does not change a single thing unless she cuts her breasts off or something, so impregnate her or marry her or some shit before that happens
>woman is being moronic
many such cases
>surprisingly strong and we wrestle all the time
dyel, also lol i would frick her even if she had a penis who gives a frick you fricking chud
Broke up with girlfriend of 3 years because she was cheating on me. At first it felt liberating, but the realization is starting to sink in and I feel horribly depressed. Went to the gym today to get my mind off it and unironically almost started crying during my workouts. She was my first girlfriend, and the first girl I lost my virginity with. Shit really hurts bad bros. I’m not sure how to proceed. I know it’s for the best in the long run but right now I’m hurting pretty fricking bad.
>3 years
is fine to cry but don't be a pussy.
You used to depend on her, she was your strength, now she is gone, and took that strength with her. Right now you are weaker. Be stronger than you was with her.
Here is the hymn of the cuck:
Focus on yourself from now on.
Get with the second girl you lost your virginity with.
>almost started crying during my workout
I've been there but not because of women. It was pretty funny because out of the corner of my eye I saw some guy staring at me between sets and I straightened up pretty quickly after having my head in my hands.
Club soda with grenadine. My head has been pounding all day and last night was a particularly hellish night of alcohol sweats. I think I’m actually sick because I never get this shit, usually just extremely hot and hellish dreams. I was basically stuck in a loop and didn’t get any sleep or relief. Silver lining is that I’m finally back on the fasting wagon and my normal shitty foods taste like plastic poison
Going from 270 to 230 in under two months and getting no remarks about it is pretty demoralizing. I should be 220 when I see my family for christmas, I hope they have at least something nice to say.
Women don't care, and coworkers see you every day. Lose another 60 and you should see results.
its about the journey, not necessarily about the result. you have shown that you can do it, which speaks volumes about you in a positive way. WAGMI
I think people struggle to workout because they see it as a form of self improvement instead of self harm. I lift to feel pain and I'm addicted to feeling that pain and I'm totally emotionally numb and feel nothing emotionally.
>nearly 30
>265lbs
>5'10"
Godfricking damn it I should kill myself.
How about you put the burger and soda down, chungus
Vodka & water please!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATOOMUCHFOODIHATEALLTHEFOODANDTHESTUPIDHOLIDAYSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Never fell for the online dating meme. 2 weeks ago I made a tinder profile out of pure loneliness:
>50 matches in 5 days
>message all of them
>only get 5 replies total
>>the frick is this shit
>ask one out, she cancels on the day we had to go out
>ask second one out, she cancels with some bullshit excuse that she's sick
>ask third one out, she removes me
>ask fourth one out, left on seen
>ask fifth one out, "id love to but im busy in the next 3 weeks" , obvi not interested
>delete all the apps
>continue playing video games alone in my house
Not feeling sorry for myself, nor am I b***hing. Just in feeling slumped and friend-simulating with my IST anons because i have no friends irl.
These things are pure luck. Yeah, obviously if you have decent pics and know how to talk you'll have a better tame but even Chad has to go through stupid shit and time wasters on tinder. I recall some pua guy who fricked 100+ girls talking about how his rate of success is 1 in 10. Now imagine it's even lower on apps full of women who are talking with dozens of guys at the same time or are there only for the dopamine hit. If you refuse to go for 5/10 or lower things get even rougher. I pull a decent woman from the apps every two months or so but I'm selective as frick. You could probably pull one or two a month if your only criteria is not being fat.
Also, these things are huge time waster. You've no idea how much. Keep an eye out for gold diggers and split things on the first date too.
skill issue, you are supposed to grind experience and shitpost until you make one laugh. If she installed the app at all is because she want's sex.
>If she installed the app at all is because she wants attention and validation.
FTFY
>Half of Tinder users don't want a date
archive.vn/biquf
i am at my breaking point
Either go to sleep or go for a run.
Skinnyfat 4 lyfe.
Lost a lot of weight but stuck at skinnyfat for the past 2 years. Been lifting consistently and have barely put on any muscle. Thought I had diet figured out but apparently not.
Oh well, at least I'm not an obese alcoholic smoker anymore.
Today I'm going to OHP before bench press.
I haven't really touched a woman in years.
There's a stranger in the neighborhood who tries to have conversations with me. I don't really know him but he saw me running at 6AM a couple times and started saying hello.
Swiss Miss in whole milk, with the little marshmallows.
I need to make a change in my career, but even though I'm single I can't relocate for family reasons. It's depressing because I'm getting lines dropped from some pretty serious companies and I can't take advantage of any of them. Meanwhile, I have to wait and pounce on every good opening in my area because my specialty is not heavily represented here.
On the upside, Q1 starts in January which means lots of new job postings even with a recession. After I pull off the move, I'll be on a good trajectory for my long-term career and financial goals but until then I'm stuck.
Unrelated, where the frick do people meet new friends and women? Dating apps aren't for the former and are a crapshoot for the latter.
I used to yearn for a girlfriend but after interacting with various women I've realized that happiness can only come from within, and I'm fine with being alone for a while.
I’ve had a number of experiences with women this year that has completely changed my perspective on the entire gender. I never put them on a pedestal, I never gave up my personality for sex, I’ve never hated women at any point either too be clear, but I became close to a number of women this year with wildly different lifestyles but the same dumb shit they’d do being a common thread. I could go into detail about the women and their effects on me but that’s not the point, it’s that through all that I’ve reached a point of peace.
For the longest time I thought myself an unlovable monster, due to mental health and upbringing, and finally breaking thinking that whilst also being witness to another’s self destruction, it was scary. I’ve been a person that was so consumed by what I wasn’t, that I never celebrated who I am or who I could be. Now I gotta find the first step to figuring that out, well the second step since gym/overall physical health was first step. I’m not sure what the step is but I’m excited to find it.
*changed my perspective on the entire gender and also myself.
>have no clue on how to socialmax
>that's my resolution for 2024
>went to sspx mass
>talked to a chud there and he said that the women there are worse than secular prostitutes lol
don't know where to turn
>talked to a chud there and he said that the women there are worse than secular prostitutes lol
Storytime.
I was gonna, but I didn't want to bore people with it.
>be me
>start going to sspx mass because my priest won't stfu about "refugees welcome" nonsense and women dress like absolute thots and it's distracting of course
>try to go this sunday, supposedly it's on the 4th sunday of the month
>it's closed
>see some other dude around
>"Hey, do you happen to be here for mass?"
>Start chatting with the guy, he's clearly intelligent, well versed in theology and philosophy, but a manlet, with a bunch of acne and chud haircut.
>Soon realized he's borderline blackpilled and starts hitting me with redpill slang,like incels, etc, which honestly was based.
>I tell him I'm honestly sick of women dressing like prostitutes in Novus Ordo, and at sspx they wear a veil...
>"there's people coming to mass simply because they are incels and think they are going to find something here"
>"If I told you what I've heard about some of the people who attend these ultra conservative circles, you wouldn't believe it, I don't wanna say names tho."
>" the new converts are always the worst, the born again virgins etc"
>I nod my head and concur
>He later on mentioned out country, Portugal should be a dictatorship and I smiled thinking he was being sarcastic be he maintained a very serious expression lol
>We also discussed how women shouldn't vote etc, very based indeed., he says:
>These women are very trad, but then they meet some tall guy with muscles and they get with him quickly"
I couldn't help but think he was only saying this because he was a manlet Incel/volcel wtv, but even though I'm 6'0 myself, I agree with him. I do think women do have to be somewhat fricked up to start going to ultra trad latin mass, like, women are very agreeable and this is not the norm. Like being a punk, rockabilly, goth is out of the norm...and we know those girls aren't very normal.But then again, and we talked about this, the average secular woman that goes to novus ordo, has at least 5 bodies.
I always kept my distance from sspx because it seems like the kind of thing that attracts the wrong people for the wrong reasons. Also because it's a clearly schismatic and heretical movement. Novus Ordo does feel spiritually dead tho. There's no sense of community and people seem to be just going through the motions. I wonder if I should give a chance to ortholarping but it seems like the kind of thing you've to be born into, otherwise you become some incel perpetually rambling about Patriach Chudwel and obscure ecumenical decisions from the third century instead of focusing on being a good Christian.
There's also the fact everyone who goes there in my country is eastern european, middle eastern or greek so I would stick out like a sore thumb.
>There's also the fact everyone who goes there in my country is eastern european, middle eastern or greek so I would stick out like a sore thumb.
>yeah I would also like to try it but it's exactly as you've said. It's 99% Ukrainians who attend here, and mass is in Ukrainian yeah... But women do wear a veil so.
In some ways I’m making my life better but meeting a girl feels like it’s farther away than ever.
I thought I was learning to just put up with it but that won’t be possible. I just keep getting sadder and sadder.
>go out to get dinner with friends
>waitress our age, pretty alternative girl nothing I would date but definitely frick
>look up, giving me THOSE eyes, shes blushing when she talks to me and does the whole hair twirling shit
>keeps coming by the whole night to talk to me see how only I’m doing, stuff like leans in close to me, squeezed my bicep a few times, typical shit Ive encountered when a woman is 100% into me
>decide I’ll get her number when we’re leaving see where it goes she seems cool
>fat frick balding manlet with patchy pubic hair cope beard and his first Gf, also a fat frick randomly say out loud that she’s really hot
>manlet starts saying out loud that she’s into him and wants him
>asks his GF if she agrees, if she would be down to try to have a threesome with her
>the GF hesitates and agrees with him in what seemed like a little white lie to protect his feelings sort of way
>think okay whatever she’s blown you off the entire time and has been up only my ass go ahead try homosexual
>dude starts flat out demanding she comes home with him and his gf doesn’t even attempt to be smooth about it just flat out grabs her by the shirt like a child and says “H-HI I COULDNT HELP BUT NOTICE YOU EYEING ME D-d- would y- w-would you like to come home with me and my beautiful wife here?”
>half the tables around us have gone silent and are staring
>waitress goes blank faced and stares. Looks back to me with this “wtf” expression
>I literally face palmed I don’t think I’ve ever done that in a non joking way in my life
>she leaves, different waitress finishes up with us
>this fricking geek then later in the night kept talking about how shy he made her and how much she wanted him and his whale. I’ve cut this dipshit off. I cant be friends with something like this. I also can’t help but feel he did this not due to lack of social aptitude but to be malicious because hes always tried to ruin anything I do, or he will take credit for any success I do have
i dont blame you for cutting him off. that is some extremely moronic shit to be doing. if he is willing to do that around you now, imagine the kind of shit he is going to do later that is going to be much worse.
I know. I’ve been his friend for over 5 years. It’s gradually become worse and worse over time. He’s done all sorts of stupid shit. I could go on and on telling stories, but bottom line it just plain seems to be that he’s extremely insecure and envious. The dudes a fricking loser. He’s lucky that I had the self control in various other circumstances where he 100% deserved this, but to not kick his ass and show his heifer how pathetic he was.
Here’s an example to show what kind of weak homosexual this is
>dude says he wants to tear the heads off of an invasive mouse species in our area to attempt to sound valiant
>really he likes the power of feeling justified to torture something smaller than himself for a change, randomly says this all the time, but it’s still all just talk because he has never done a thing physical in his life
He’s 5’1” if that wasn’t obvious
Since there's so much discussion about dating apps on the thread, what's the deal with walled women with a profile full of exigences that act very combative while talking? I mean it's obvious from the get go that they're insecure as hell but what's up with the weapons grade cope? I don't understand what's the play here. Acting like that will alienate any man besides the desperate and undesirable ones. Is the whole charade just a way for them to go "I tried the apps but didn't find any decent men" and justify their loneliness to themselves?
My ex was so easy to make cum. I'd do it once with my fingers every single time, then she'd cum twice or more from getting doggystyled before I did.
My current gf usually cant cum at all without a vibrator. She cant even get herself off with her fingers. Ive gotten her to squirt like once from really rough doggy but never again. Feels bad man.
>too fat to escape neet
I couldn’t find clothes that fit for interviews. Not even just a polo shirt. I’m not even so ginormous I should have that kind of problem yet I’m 6’2” 290lbs. Disgusting and fat, but not can’t find clothes that fit fat… or so I thought…
Anyways I don’t have time to wait I’m upping the ante on my cut, full on starvation crash diet. 1lb a week is fricking moronic at this size. 1000 calories a day nothing but potatoes and chicken. I need to drop more like 3lbs a week until I’m able to fit into my old clothes again. Looking at 3 months of this minimum for that.
I kissed and licked the breasts of a girl in my uni elevator. I don’t like her and I feel really guilty for that, especially cause I sat next to the girl I actually like and said “shes really weird she basically tried to rape me its unattractive”. I told the girl I kissed I’m uninterested before but I just thought frick it, but yeah I feel really bad and guilty. What should I do to alleviate the guilt other than kill myself
Don't talk shit about other women in front of a woman. You're just asking for trouble. Just let it all sizzle down and minimize contact with the girl in question.
Guilt is one of the consequences. It'll go away, but take this as a hard lesson.
>t. felt guilty from playing with women too
I'll take eggnog. Good vibes today. Went to a barbeque with my siblings this weekend and had a long chat with them. Even though my family has become a lot smaller over the years, it's times like these that make me appreciate the ones that really matter and look out for me more. Makes me feel a little foolish for even caring about others that have done nothing but given me headaches and debts
36. Divorced. Balding. 5'8". Joyless since the divorce.
But I have a good job and I can bench 2pl8.
Tell me things are gonna get better bros. Depression is hell
>still forever alone
>still haven't reached 1/2/3/4 after nearly 1 year of going to the gym
>still stuck in level 1 job at company
>still /fat/
It's rough bros
I say this in the nicest way: get over yourself man
>still forever alone
You're currently alone. Not forever.
>still haven't reached 1/2/3/4 after nearly 1 year of going to the gym
Nearly 1 year is barely shit and most people will never achieve 1/2/3/4, expecting yourself to do it in less than a year is insane. If you're not blasting PEDs 1/2/3/4 takes years to achieve and is extremely impressive, in the top 1% of lifters, despite what morons here who do not post body will tell you. Achieving those lifts as a natty takes not only a long time but a long time spent efficiently of grueling, disciplined progressive overload where you are constantly pushing yourself to do more volume than your last training session.
>still stuck in level 1 job at company
>still /fat/
Judging by your attitude about 1/2/3/4 I'm assuming you haven't been "stuck" for more than a year.
Instant gratification only happens in video games. Just keep pushing. Little by little.
Need advice bros. Should I keep/trim my hair (left) or go for right?
Keep, right is male gazed and left is supra female appeal
Thanks bro. I'll get other opinions as well.
>male gaze
>supra female
What are these terms
male gazer here and i also think u should keep it. looks way better
Frick if I know. Left is more work though so be careful of not having your hair look like shit because you get lazy. Right is more youthful and better if its hot as frick/hard trouble taking care of your hair.
Well the week started off shit. I tried inviting a girl out but i couldnt even do it because the conversation kept changing too fast for me to even say anything. The manlet won today's battle but ill win the whole war. On a more positive note my back is fully healed and i can now squat again so 40kg here we go again.
I asked the cute redhead girl out in my english class. First I went to her to that I wanted to speak with her after class and she said like yeah ofcourse with a smile. I waited until she was done and I told her " I want to know you better so do you want to have lunch together next monday." She smiled and said "Thats lovely but im sorry I already have a boyfriend." I think I said shit outloud but I said its okay and we talked a bit about her presentation until I told her I had to go to my next class. Im kinda bummed she said no since shes so far the most beautifull girl I saw in my uni but idk. It is what it is
Btw when I told her that I wanted to talk with her that was the first time I ever spoke with her so I had no idea if she had someone
Well shit man. Ive had that happen a lot aswell. One case hurt bad because she made a holocaust joke the first day we met. Would have been wife material if she wasnt taken. Ill have a protein shake to a future where we all make it.
Frick man that must have hurt. But yea im bummed out by it since she is seriously the most beautifull girl I saw so far. Does engineering just like me and a smile that would make the angels even jealous. But it is what it is. I asked and now that I know the answer I move on.
Cheers for a better future
Nice job. It happens. Now do it again with another cute girl and take a bit less time to get around to asking her. Do this until it becomes habit and you start slaying pussy, or you find a really good girl and you dedicate to her. Don't just give up on the first one. You've unlocked the secret that everyone freaks out about for most of their lives.
I can't sleep and I don't know if it's because I suddenly stopped drinking a frick ton of caffeine, because I'm overtraining, or something else.
Telemarketers need to die.
The doctor said that I don't have gyno. Let's fricking go bros.
>girl in my friends group is a hot tomboy goth girl who lifts.
>I'm crushing hard on her
>she says she likes strong buff men
>went back to lifting two months ago. Muscle memory is kicking in and I'm getting gains
>suddenly new guy enters my friend group
>buff gym goer, kind of DYEL for IST standards but pretty good looking
>girl starts flirting with him and praising his body and voice
>completely ignores me
I kind of want to kill myself tbqh
If she wasn't flirting with you already, she wasn't going to flirt with you getting buff. Thems just the facts bruh. Unless some situation happened that changed things between you, you're "friendzoned" so to speak. I'm talking like high in the woods just you two together on a friend-trip.
I'll have a whiskey, neat. Make it a double.
>be me
>trying to lose weight
>started at 212
>Intermittent fasting, doing pretty well. It's not even hard
>down to 203 before Thanksgiving
>One big meal won't kill me
>206 the day after
>think "whatever, probably just water weight. I'll get my diet back on track and it'll be gone in a day or two"
>go back to my regular diet
>209 this morning
What the frick, how!? It doesn't even make sense! How the hell did I lose weeks of progress in just the past few days?
It’s just of the game man. Any number of things could cause that
>sodium
>water intake
>lifting
>cardio, believe it or not
>how much you pissed
>fiber
Just trust the process. I’ve been there. I advise you to not look at the scale for another 3 weeks though, that’s the trick I had to do. Just assume each week I weighed less, weigh at 3 week mark and boom usually, not always because homosexual fluctuations, but usually I would be even lower. Guarantee in the next 3 weeks you lose more than you expected
For the anon who’s thread capsized that wanted help finding direction, assuming that wasn’t bait, picrel
I've been getting more reckless recently. I work a dangerous job and I've been taking unnecessary risk outside of work I've just been reckless too. It didn't hit me until I heard it separately from a friend a co-worker. Think it's because I just don't know what I'm doing. Feels like I'm just spinning my wheels. I've got hobbies, friends, and family but life just feels like a drag and nothing feels worth it. Recently I can't help but think I just want to kill myself. Life doesn't feel worth living in the long run.
Okay which of you is this
I think I fricked up the order doesn’t matter funny read
Nevermind got the order right
This dudes jargon has to be a ISTizen