How can I be more mysterious in the gym?
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How can I be more mysterious in the gym?
How can I be more mysterious in the gym?
Thalidomide Vintage Ad Shirt $22.14 |
CRIME Shirt $21.68 |
Thalidomide Vintage Ad Shirt $22.14 |
It's already a mystery how you're such a massive homosexual
Train in home gym. Never talk about it.
When you spot a cardiobunny sweating, crawl behind her and take a huge sniff off her yoga pants. Everyone will think you are a cool alpha.
Pace back and forth. People will wonder what's on your mind, king.
wear a mask or full face cover. make sure it's a different one every day. keep them guessing. don't let anyone see your face.
Sorry anon, scamdemic made everyone covering their face look like bend over and take it types, not mysterious.
A guy in my gym wears a skull mask and a cap, I see him all the time and have never seen his face. I’d like to think he’s a cool guy but likely just has weapons grade autism.
He might be a ghoul anon
This definitely works
Also change the name on your gym membership to something mysterious
Miss Tia Rios
not to be racist but why is it just accepted that black people and only black people wear these i mean what the frick
Don't use your phone at all during your time in the gym. Always crouch during rest sets staring into the distance
do exercises no one there has ever seen, for example
>jefferson lift
>landmine kneeling squeeze press
>behind the neck ohp
>weighted barbell pistol squat
etc
these are good
the rest will either get you arrested or shot lol
Mumble to yourself about murder between each set
ask the gym janny to tell you have 10 minutes before you need to leave and then switch off the lights. then you declare loudly: "then we shall lift in the dark"
Every time you go to the gym, lift the reception (ideally including the girl) as a warmup.
Cover your face in black paint so nobody knows who you are
gather 100 strong men. lay siege to the gym and conquer it
Stare off into the distance in the same location between all your sets like Gatsby.
i do this but the 'location' being a girl's cleavage
Lift heavy on compound lifts, talking to nobody, leave.
Give people a fake name people at my gym think my name is Thomas Carl people started calling me TC and Tom cat and Top Cat. My name is Nick and they have no clue
kek. I used to do this at school just to frick with people. ended up forgetting my name one day and my mom beat me with a stick until it broke. had to buy a new one with my lunch money.
Go around and shake hands with everyone in the gym. But when someone asks you your name just say a different name every time.
Make no eye contact
Always make faces when you lift, that way no one can tell what you look like normally
Speak latin to yourself while lifiting, loudly.
ELEVARE VOLO!
Join several gyms and only work out at each gym once a month.
I have about seven 24 hour fitness that are under 15 miles of driving from me so this wouldn't be that impossible
I actually do this. I have a main gym and when I get bored I go to another gym in the same gym chain in a different city for a month or two. It gives me the whole
>who's the new guy
appeal for girls. I've been able to flirt with girls in the gym without caring since I'll leave in a month and go to another gym in a different city.
>yeah i drove 96 miles to this new gym
>but nobody recognizes me haha so i got to try another pick up line about being the new guy haha
>no it never worked why
>yeah its a lot of money on gas
>but the ukranians need our help and this is about being a decent person
>of course its a hybrid
Go up to strangers and fireman carry them to your van in the parking lot.
wear fingerless gloves or the rubber finger tips that bank tellers use
Get a wizard cloak and always spell out an incantation before hitting a pr. If possible draw some incantations with chalk. Warning: This advice can only wor if you're already strong.
Go in wearing fluorescent pink and a shitty halloween mask, people will wonder wtf is wrong with you
find out where the light switch is and turn it off every time you enter the gym, then blast your theme music from your phone or if you're super autistic, from one of those speaker shirts
Lift in one of these
I stare at the wall between sets and occasionally laugh audibly at the thoughts in my head.
Drop a smoke bomb every time you want to leave the gym.
Don’t have earbuds in, don’t bring a phone, dress like a bum, never talk to anyone.
I put my phone away in my bag as I enter the gym and I don't listen to music, is it that weird?
No, the guy who made that post is just a homosexualBlack person
Don't talk to anyone. Keep your headphones in at all time. If someone waves and says hi ignore it.
Wear a hat and don't ever ask for more. Only stare at girls asses if you aren't turning away from them and there's no cameras.
>'wow, anon, your biceps look great. What do you do?'
>'....'
>pulls really hard on draw strings to disappear
>'i lift'
>pull out cigarette and put it in the one tiny holy left over your face from pulling the draw strings really tight
>big inhale
>big exhale
>only do 10 minutes of treadmill
>leave