Minimalistic workout for a depressed and alcoholic fuck

I will spare you the sob stories bros, long stories short, I am an early 30s 2/10 virgin with multiple physical and mental diseases and down half a bottle of rum daily, nontheless I want to give lifting a chance with a workout that is minimalistic but still hits my entire body at home.
Current plan:
>Chin ups and push ups 3x a week
>Lunges/Squats and crunches/leg raises 3x a week
>1x a week break/1x a week burpees
That should hit my whole body, no? Not perfectly of course, but will this give me a body where I can look in the mirror and feel good?
Thanks

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  1. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Lunges/Squats and crunches/leg raises 3x a week
    >1x a week break/1x a week burpees
    just stick with basic compounds (chins/pullups/dips/pushups), that alone is enough as a fullbody workout, bump or reduce frequency according to volume
    for legs just get a kettlebell or better yet go lift some shit, doing shit like one leg squats is cool and all but don't expect gains
    >at home
    go IST and find a damn pullup bar, I feel so happy when I leave the cuck cage and can watch some green shit around, breathe relatively fresh air and listen to birds while working out

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >just stick with basic compounds (chins/pullups/dips/pushups), that alone is enough as a fullbody workout, bump or reduce frequency according to volume
      Thanks!
      But I have. Pull up bar at home. Never used it before but now I will, mot sure I have the equipment to do dips
      Ok, I will start TODAY with push ups and chin ups, maybe pull ups if I manage to do thise too.
      Thank you for the reply

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >the equipment to do dips
        I use two chairs on a yoga mat.

  2. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Whole eggs + ashwagandha+ flax seed meal are the holy Trinity of muscle gains. All have multiple studies that prove they boost muscle gains and endurance during work outs. You'll gain muscle with ease.

    Ashwagandha+ holy basil +Rhodiola rosea help with depression. Just check if they frick with any medication You're on. Ashwagandha and holy basil take a month to start working. Rhodiola rosea for me worked quicker.

    Eating organic+ probiotics will boost serotonin the happy chemical in our brain that can only come from probiotics. A study found 20% of crap food is allowed but more than that fricks up our probiotics from the pesticides that act as a antibiotic.

    Getting outside and being in nature will boost mood and when the sun is out, you'll get more vitamin d than you get from food. Which is also linked to easing depression.

    T. Depressedgay that did all of that and now can function like a human.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Whole eggs + ashwagandha+ flax seed meal are the holy Trinity of muscle gains. All have multiple studies that prove they boost muscle gains and endurance during work outs. You'll gain muscle with ease.
      I have access to eggs, but hand to heart I have to google what the other two things even are haha
      >Ashwagandha+ holy basil +Rhodiola rosea help with depression. Just check if they frick with any medication You're on. Ashwagandha and holy basil take a month to start working. Rhodiola rosea for me worked quicker.
      Ashwagandha+ holy basil +Rhodiola rosea help with depression. Just check if they frick with any medication You're on. Ashwagandha and holy basil take a month to start working. Rhodiola rosea for me worked quicker.
      >Eating organic+ probiotics will boost serotonin the happy chemical in our brain that can only come from probiotics. A study found 20% of crap food is allowed but more than that fricks up our probiotics from the pesticides that act as a antibiotic.
      >Getting outside and being in nature will boost mood and when the sun is out, you'll get more vitamin d than you get from food. Which is also linked to easing depression.
      Have to google all of that too (you think this stuff is legal in Germany?) but my depression is not the usual
      >Chad left me 🙁
      I have the kind of severe depression disorder where even high dosages of antidepressants do nothing. It's not one thing that has me feeling down, it's a solid dozen that are all suicide fuel. Before I dropped all my meds I was popping 2 pills of Remeron every day with little to no positive effect. Can't say more than that. Sucks to be me I guess. But I'm glad you are happier now.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        You can buy pajeetagandha in any sport store in Norwanistan. So it should also be legal in United Emirates of al-Germany.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Any other tips? I live in rural Midwest and I go out partying/ drinking with motherfrickers sometimes, not sure if it would be better to just stay in alone. Every time I see them they do something that makes me want to knock someone out.

      Also any idea how long it takes to get over stuff emotionally? I’ve lost a lot this year.
      >cut off contact with parents, no chance for revival. Was in a desperate place financially after automotive accident but when I asked for help they weren’t for it, instead donated a shitload of money to some 3rd world thing
      >girlfriend died. In hindsight I didn’t lose much, she was cheating and trying to extort money but I still feel like shit, even being who she was the world lost something

      It feels like my chest is eating itself at work. Things have become progressively better but still struggling

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >Was in a desperate place financially after automotive accident but when I asked for help they weren’t for it, instead donated a shitload of money to some 3rd world thing
        God I hate rich boomers so fricking much
        >girlfriend died. In hindsight I didn’t lose much, she was cheating and trying to extort money but I still feel like shit, even being who she was the world lost something
        Like you said, sorry to say, but she was scum. People often say
        >Oh my God he/she was a saint!
        Once one has passed, but as you know yourself, that's not the case a lot of times. Cheating and extorting money is not something easily forgiven, or at all. If you had nothing to do with her death directly, you have no rational reason to feel bad.
        As for how long it takes to get over stuff emotionally, it varies strongly from person to person. Some NPCs don't think twice about the death of a loved one. Other people still feel bad that they didn't ask a girl out after 40 years. For me, I realized that after all the suffering and the daily intrusive thoughts, eventually, can after a year, maybe two, maybe three I realize "Hey, I haven't thought about X at all for the past few days/weeks." And if it pops into my head out of nowhere from time to time, I don't fall back into the pit, my brain just says "Yeah, that happened." but there is no emotion or resentment attached to it. And that's when you are healed so to speak, the damage is still done, but it doesn't bother you anymore. It's just time.

  3. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    When I feel like arse in winter I make my workouts a little bit easier, like cutting it to 60% effort, just to get a workout for the day.

    For full body + chinups here is a thing to try: do circular workouts

    1 set pullups/chinups
    1 set leg raises
    1 set pushups
    1 set squats

    2 min rest

    repeat until failure or bored

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      But that's full body right?
      I thought I could alternate chin ups + pushups and leg work + stomach work, but I guess I can just do both on one day every sexond day.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Yeah, full body if you don't want to separate everything into a separate day.
        It's an option for lazy people or during lazy seasons.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Oohh I get it. It's very time efficient, when my arms are resting I train my legs. Thanks! This might be even better than my plan to split push/chin ups and leg/abs work on two days

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Try things, see what works best.

  4. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Anything is better than nothing bro, just try make sure you try and challenge yourself and don't get stuck in the "well I guess I did 10" mindset. You CAN make respectable gains by manipulating angles and other intensity techniques (FitnessFAQs on youtube is a really good resource for this)
    Do what you can senpai, don't underwhelm yourself, just try to push that threshold over time. Consistency is the number one drive. I believe in you anon.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Thanks my man.
      For some reason I woke up today and thought
      >SUNS OUT GUNS OUT
      which is moronic since it's very cold but this motto kinda motivates me to maybe get lots of muscle until summer before I [redacted], I don't know, maybe a last ditch effort to feel good.

  5. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Heres a lazy but effective minimalist routine.

    Start with ten reps on any of the exercises you do.
    Add 10 more reps each day.
    Build this up to 100 reps and then do it faster or add weight, or keep adding reps if you want

  6. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    you're gonna have to stop drinking so much if you want to see results

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I can stop any day... haha...
      But yeah, I know. Just recently found out 100ml pf 40% has 200-220 calories and I drink half a bottle a day, that's 700 calories daily only from alcohol.
      Plus, it's been fricking up my bowels I think
      But yeah, it's easy to say
      >just stop bro
      When being sober is not a nightmare
      I will try though
      Suns out guns out, lean muscular body until summer and for that I have to ditch it, or at least drink less

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >When being sober is not a nightmare
        unfortunately you will have to get sober first. you can't influence the nightmare world from the drunk world, you have to go into the nightmare and solve the problems there.

        there was some episode of Star Trek where a guy was attacked somehow and got trapped in a nightmare in his own mind with some guy who was trying to kill him and he ultimately faced his fear or whatever and defeated the guy

        if that doesn't work for you, find or invent your own metaphor. you have to find something that works, no one can tell you how to do it. for me I just lost the ability to make myself feel good with alcohol, it got to the point where I was getting drunk and fantasizing about how awesome life was going to be once I got sober. there was nothing left to do and it became incredibly easy not to drink after that. now I am becoming fit and my other problems are just disintegrating by themselves because I have the capability and interest to work on my life again

        you have to find a way though, because exercising is an absolute waste of your time if you aren't going to quit drinking

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >When being sober is not a nightmare
        It will be a nightmare. But don't run from it; embrace it. Welcome it. Prove you're better than it.

  7. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    before you even start talking about working out you need to ween yourself off the booze (at a responsible pace to minimize withdrawal of course)

    i also deal multiple ongoing health problems and all of them were made worse when i was drinking. you gotta eat the elephant one bite at a time, starting with your alcoholism. it's tempting to go straight from the couch to the squat rack but you'd just be setting yourself up for injury. stop the booze, fix your sleep schedule and THEN go to the gym.

  8. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    No such thing as a mental disease. Any problem in the kind can and must be solved with the mind.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Absolute brainlet take
      Literal sumhumans unable to understand the concept of mental illness and then saying
      >I don't get it, therefore it doesn't exist!
      Same as the 80IQ mudshits saying evolution isn't real because they are literally too moronic to get it.
      Monkey.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        > i literally have to act like a whiny child i have a LE DISORDER
        > i literally have to drink every day, then cry about drinking every day. i have a LE DISORDER
        loser...

  9. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Best of luck, dude. But I have to point something out. You're on here saying "I'll stop when it gets better", when in reality it gets better when you stop.
    If you are consistently drinking that much booze, it is interrupting your sleep, as well as muscle protein synthesis. Basically, your liver is constantly processing the alcohol first because it treats it like a poison. Lack of deep sleep means that you aren't recovering. Large alcohol intake also kills test production.

    If you need help, get it. Life is a lot better on the other side of being boozy all the time.

    ?si=cneZpP4dJIVb90hH

  10. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    No you won't build muscle with push ups go to a fricking gym

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      yes you absolutely can what the fuq are you talking about.
      inclines, declines, diamonds, pike....
      you are an absolute idiot if you dont think you can mog 99% of the population through body weight alone

  11. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    respectfully, unfrick your alcohol dependency first. stop buying it. cringe.

    >But I have. Pull up bar at home.
    Good. start with dead hangs. great for the back.

  12. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Stop drinking. You're fricking up your recovery and your hormones. Its not easy but do it anyway, you'll thank yourself.

    >t. ex drunk

  13. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Stop or very least reduce drinking. Only go for walks and body exercise to help with mood.
    You need to research what booze does to vitamin b1 thiamine levels. And take b1 when you are sober to recover brain damage.

  14. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    WAAGMI

  15. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Just keep a set of dumbells on the couch and do wrist curls and shoulder presses
    Get some resistance bands for those rhomBOIDS

  16. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Only gays think you can't build leg muscle with calisthenics. It's barbell cope just like the calisthenics bros who think deadlifts are ineffective because you magically will lose mobility or your spine will snap in half. So sick of these gays on both sides. OP, you're on the right track. ANYTHING is better than what you were previously doing.

    >t. 6 months sober because alcohol is poison.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Only gays think you can't build leg muscle with calisthenics
      No, anon, it's common knowledge
      A pistol squat is equivalent to a squatting your bodyweighg in terms of muscle tension and that's the best calisthenics exercise for legs (obviously it's harder because of balance, but balance doesn't build muscle in a meaningful way)

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