it’s another of these threads, go ahead and share them.
>almost ready to leave the gym
>nasty arm pump and on my last exercise
>”look at mr bodybuilder over here”
>turn around and see girl i know from boxing (quit a year ago)
>we greet each other and engage in small talk
>can’t help but notice she is constantly smiling and holding eye contact
>catch myself talking to her with a shit eating grin on my face
>”so you didn’t stop training i see”
>pokes my chest and i do one quick pec bounce
>she starts giggling and i compliment her
>more teasing and eventually i leave
>feel human again
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>visit OP's mom
>she says nice wiener bro
>say thanks, turn 360 and walk away
>say thanks, turn 360 and walk away
Going for seconds, nice.
>visit OP's mom
>she says nice wiener bro
>say thanks, you too, turn 360 and walk away
>>say thanks, turn 360 and walk away
you would just walk right into her dumbass
>this fricking zigger was probably born after the 360 came out
unsure if he is a zoomerBlack person or just adding a second layer to the meme lmao
Why is this hilarious every goddamn time it happens
was thinking the same
hardest i've laughed all week and I knew it was coming
OP bros....
>on train in hong kong
>killing time during a layover on my way to japan
>travelling with my brother and a friend
>there's also a woman I'm vaguely familar with but can't remember her name there
>she's acting funny around me, very close and laughing at all my jokes
>she lays down on my arm in a weird position
>starts teasing me by putting her bare feet in my face
>wake up cold and alone
what does it mean bros...
>starts teasing me by putting her bare feet in my face
the inner workings of the mind are a mystery
the peeep frpg ;ppls like an abstract work of art
You were travelling from hong kong to japan by train? Your subconscious was throwing you a bone to get you into a lucid dream.
You blew it.
Footgay got what he deserved.
One I forgot about until I syarted editing some videos I took in Hokkaido
>travelling solo in hokkaido
>go out for a couple drinks in Furano
>lesbian couple show up and start playing pool next to my seat
>have a friendly conversation with them as the only other english speaker
>dyke stares at me everytime I talk or stand up
I don't think she was sexually interested but more that she wanted the same type of energy I had
>In the middle of another conversation, mom tells me “You’re the textbook example, right? You’re natural, you trained for a year going 4-5 times a week for hours, eating clean, getting the protein. You don’t drink alcohol or do drugs. You put on so much muscle in a year, you went from a medium to an XL. You look so much like your father now.”
>My father was a bodybuilder, and they used to work out all the time when they were young.
Thanks mom, but I’m not even close yet.
b@sed
i wish my dad worked out so I could feel better about mogging him
adorable
Post dad
>work in high school
>students trying to guess my age one day
>guessing late twenties/early thirties
>kid says I'm too built to be 30
>am 30
Frick that's so cute.
I enjoy animals enjoying things.
how do you know it's enjoying it?
Saw him blog posting about it on /alg/
This. Dunno about crocodiles but dogs look they have a wide smile when they're stressed.
They also pull that face when you're giving them the best scratch of the day.
You sound like someone who says dogs are just pets, not members of the family.
And you sound like somebody who stresses the living shit out of a "member of the familiy" without understanding it's behavioru.
You probably put moronic clothes on your dog and think it's happy because it's "smiling"
You sound like the human who feeds the dogs and not the human the dogs bond with.
> also work in high school
> pull up outaide and step out of my car to go inside
> hear girl's voice above me say "he's *so* handsome
> another girl's voice tells her to keep it down
> look up just in time to see two girls pull back in from an upstairs window
feels nice but also sad that i didn't get this attention when i was younger. I love and fear God too much to try and frick a highschooler
It's like a mine field out there brother.
>objectively best pussy
>it's illegal
The whole age of consent argument is based around mental development but at the end of the day women tend to be fricking idiots anyhow.
But yeah, be careful out there.
Women are meant to be given away by their fathers at 14 and pregnant by 16. Women shitting around until they are 30 before they have kids is what is destroying the gene pool.
only allow them to get the D after meeting the father, as the lord intended
Age didn't stop God from siring Jesus.
god does not care about whether a chick is in school or not
why didn't you try to hook up with her?
If anyone remembers my post from last thread, I texted the hot stalker-ish chick and she left me on read.
Absolute nutcase. Regardless, I kissed a girl last night and I'll go out with another, and I got a new job, so I couldn't care less, I'm very fricking happy right now. WAGMI.
Well you know what to do next time you're in the gym at the same time.
I don't really care, I'll just say hi then move on and ignore her. There's like, ten girls at the gym who want my attention.
>ignore her.
Like I said, you know what to do.
Never posted before, but watching kids so i have time to tell my best weekend ever.
Be me, 32 with m boy.
Going to the lake to swim with him and move big rocks to make a barrier for kids to swim in without bing nuked by boat waves.
Day 1.
Moving rocks while son floats nearby.
Rando lady watching me.
Im wearing sunglasses so she cant see that i see her.
About 30m of watching me.
>Random lady "hey is that your kid?".
>Me "uhh yeah...?"
>RL "are you a single dad?".
>Me "no im married".
>RL "ohh me too me too, but hes not here im visiting my mom".
>RLs mom next to her "heyyyyyy"
>Me "oh cool, yeah its nice here".
>RL "yeah we are at the red lion, ever been there?".
>Me "yeah a bunch of times".
>RL "well im in room ### if you wanna visit.
>Me "uhhh no thanks".
She leaves.
Day 2.
Same situation with son.
Another rando lady keeps jabbering at me while im moving rocks. Nothing important though just weather etc.
Days over.
>putting son into backpack thing.
>hear cute teen girl like 13? say to her friend who just passed me in a whisper "look at that" as she touchs her bicep.
>her fat friend G2 blurts out "LOOK AT WHAT"
>1st girl gets wide eyed and blushs, looks at me and says "your strong!"
>me "oh thank you."
>1G "what were you doing over here?"
>Me "oh! I was moving rocks for kids to swim in so waves dont hit them, you guys can swim in it if you want"
>g1 "why do you think were kids" and she weirdly smiles at me.
>me "oh no, because the water is warmer there since its closed off"
>g2 went something like "wur not keds haha"
>g1 still grinning "ill show you how were not kids" as she puts her arms together making her boobs pop.
>i awkwardly laugh and say well you kids have fun in the pool.
At a lake.
Day 3.
Told wife these two stories. Today she comes with our 1yo.
She and 1yo sitting by bank of lake.
Teens or waves broke my rock wall so im fixing it and hammering in wood to make it sturdier.
This story dosnt have much green text, just as we are heading home.
>wife "did you see that?"
>me "what"
>w "the 3 women at the bench"
>Me "yeah i saw them i guess"
>wife "they were talking about your muscles i could hear them"
>me "oh haha nice, its from moving rocks"
>wife "and one of them looked at me to see if i was looking, and took pictures of you lifting rocks"
>me "really? Thats weird"
>wife "who cares, just some pictures"
Then i got stung by a hornet on my leg.
Moral of the story? Move rocks, get stung.
>broke my rock
What?
stop piling up rocks, moron
>>wife "they were talking about your muscles i could hear them"
>>me "oh haha nice, its from moving rocks"
You're apparently out there every day moving rocks. She fricking knows, man.
Typing it out and reading it i just realized it was probably fat girl sitting on my wall that broke it.
Damn they wanted you. Were you sweating? Increased heart rate?
Fake thread homosexual
An older man once told me that the safest and best sex you’ll have is from a married woman who’s on vacation alone or with her girlfriends. The chances of her getting an stds are low and she’ll make sure she doesn’t get pregnant. It’s so fricked up but so god damn hot.
Fricking hell I hope you one day have a nice day
>Fricking hell I hope you one day have a nice day
NGMI
cute stories anon. i hope your family is doing fine
Based rockpiling chad we salute you and your autistic obsession with rocks
based moron
Based paterfamilias. Many men wouldn't have the discipline you have. No matter how much they love their wife and kids, if they had a chance of fricking some rando without anyone knowing they'd probably do it.
May you reap the many rewards for such virtue.
You homosexual.
>working last weekend (park ranger)
>stop in the gas station for a snack
>on my way out, girl sweeping is looking at me
"your uniform looks really good on you"
>say "Thanks! I like it too"
>leave
>Retail wagie
>Regular customer comes in
>He's mentally handicapped
>Always strikes up a conversation with any staff member he sees
>Comes up to me
>"HELLO MISTER YOU LOOK STRONG TODAY!"
We're all gonna make it
customer comes in
>>He's mentally handicapped
hey thats me
>walking home from work at retail job
>customer I see regularly drives past me with her arm flailing out the window
>gets out in her driveway and walks down to greet me
>we chit chat a little, she asks if I live nearby, we're literally neighbors
>She's late 40's, pretty and thicc like I like'em
>She asks for my number after a bit more small talk
>texted me tonight
bouta smash this old b***h boys
>>feel human again
%3D
>t. Kindergarten teacher
>5yo girl says her daddy hugs her really hard and it hurts sometimes, but he says sorry after
>"Well your daddy is big and strong and you are small, so he probably does it by accident"
>"Yeah he's strong, but not as strong as you"
I would have roped on the spot if I heard my daughter say that
>have crush on girl
>Go to party
>She's there
>People tell me she's out of my league
>Say 0 words to her
>Go home
nice
Should have went up to her and told her she has big milkers and then walked away.
>People tell me she's out of my league
If those people are male there's a high chance they're jealous.
It has happened like two times that some of my "friends" would tell me that I will fail and to not try my luck with some girl when I was already making out with her the previous day.
I loved telling them how we were already together and seeing the confused, sad look on their faces.
Those people were not your friends
Very nice. Here's mine
>meet girl in friends group
>talk with her
>it's nice and effortless
>friend jokes we should get together
>I freeze
>can't ask her number now
>go home
You realize when friends say that, it means they are trying to hook you 2 up and the other girl is fine with it. They probably talked about it before. Stop being autistic
> girl throws herself at me
> leave without doing anything
> immediately brag about it on a Canadian vasectomy forum
>getting called big guy by random people at least a few times a week
I think I made it.
you're in a waiting room to use the shitter?? what are you talking about?
>Celebrating daughter 2 birthday.
>Party is about to start people slowly coming over.
>Go upstairs to take a shower
>Door opens while I'm drying myself, it's wife's cousins lesbo partner
>She says sorry and leaves
>Come downstairs to awkwardness in kitchen
>Wife, cousin and cousins lesbo gf in kitchen
>I was just telling your wife about how your muscles aren't the only thing that's big
My Hispanic wife laughed but after the party told me they are never allowed back
>But she's a lesbian?
>Oh, please, next party she'll be trying to frick you in my bed
Why are women like this?
Next story
>Sitting at a table at my gym after showering, waiting for wife to finish workout
>Women just sits down at the my table and takes the seat across from me
>I look at her and she says nothing
>I get weirded out and get up to walk away
My Hispanic wife thought it was a gym gf and threatened to kill me in my sleep if she ever sees me talking to her
I've literally never seen this woman before in my life
Moral
If you don't want your wife to leave you make sure women mire you. My wife loves to frick even after 3 kids and I know it's because she thinks other women desire me therefore she desires me
>Hispanic wife
cringe
Why would you call your wife a spic
Because she is a Hispanic.
A trad Hispanic that cooks cleans and takes care of the house. Best wife ever
at least your Hispanic wife speaks english. there was a anon on /misc/ who married a Hispanic who didnt know english lol. they couldnt even talk togehter and they had kids.
Anyone got the green text?
Because she is one.
white supremacists exclusively date non-white women, didnt you know?
>married a spic
only got yourself to blame
>start working out again a week ago
>conditioning better, soreness gone; body remembering how to lift
>help get some groceries out of the trunk
>two packages of water left
>hold one in each arm with the last bag
>feels doable
>get inside and squat the waters down gently while braced and put the bag away
>mum tells me the neighbors across the street had the biggest smile while watching me
kind of embarrassing but I was feeling the results with how comfortable it was to do
im way to ugly to get mires from girls
I do get compliments from the guys at my boxing gym though
>im way to ugly to get mires from girls
same here, my head doesn't match my body. I'm bald and ugly, but from neck down look good. How far are doctors from a head transplant?
>making breakfast pancakes for wife and kids
>using the heavy steel pan
>flipping the pancakes like it's nothing
>wife smiles and kisses my neck
>kids go nuts "wooow that pan is so heavy"
>alarm goes off
>wake up
grab a brush and put on a lil make up
AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH
Haha
Why did you say “breakfast pancakes” rather than just “pancakes”
>finish gym
>wearing comfy oversized shirt on top
>walking to grab french fries
>see cute blonde in distance
>as if by magic wind blows hard like the marilyn monroe skirt scene
>my shirt blows slightly off my shoulders and expose my sleeveless cutoff
>blonde turns away when i make eye contact and smile
>walk past
>thought she was cute and so i turned around to check out her butt
>she was turned and staring at me too
I shoulda made a move, but I was high and moronic. Im quitting the devils lettuce. Weed makes me a pussy unlike booze
DYEL but nice mire
>I was high and moronic. Im quitting the devils lettuce. Weed makes me a pussy unlike booze
Same here, anon. Robbed me of so many chances. Don't let it enter your home in the first place, if you can.
i am not a fan of your clothing
same.
is all over the place
had a similar experience. saw this stunning blonde in the street, we made eye contact but kept walking. when we passed each other i turned around and she was already looking at me, standing still. my dumbass kept walking, i’ll never live it down.
who cares. u gonna pursue a girl cus she looks good? chances are shes dumb as a rock
yeah. you pursue hot girls because they're hot. you find out later whether they're dumb or not and act accordingly
Funny, weed always had the opposite effect for me
>finish gym
>I was high and moronic
Are all Finns this way?
MUH Hispanic WIFE
rolls
You are certainly on the right board
me in the back
>me on the shelf, trapped in the phantom zone
>go for an afternoon coffee with friends
>after we are done, i go to the waiter to pay
>"hey, may i pay"
>"yes handsome"
>pay and leave
>im a dude
wagmi bros
It's kinda weird when you consider that gay men are attracted to you.
But at the very least it's an affirmation of your current state of fitness and sexual market value.
Girls are seeing the same thing. wagmi
>volunteering at a festival
>report for my first shift
>ok anon, go see anonette in hall 5
>get there, find the girl in question
>oh wow look at you, we should have put you on security instead haha
>t-thanks you too
what do I have to do to get a girl like this look at me this way
1. Be handsome
2 (optional). Be interesting
>be me antisocial shut in
>friend invited me to a party and i for once agree to it
>yesterday comes around and i go with him to the party
>nervous as frick but start to get loose after a few drinks
>normies think im hilarious, might just be my autism lord knows
>lots of people i talk to mention the gym at some point
>2 separate girls asked me to flex my bicep and touched it
>go into kitchen to make myself a drink and 3 girls also happen to go
>2 of them were ones to ask me to flex previously
>we all start talking and social media comes up
>tell them i only have snapchat and that’s it
>they’re all blown away and one says she wants to add me
>i say sure and whip out my phone so she can scan my snapchat logo to add me
>all 3 girls now gather around me and scan my friend code
>more comments on the gym and a few compliments
probably meant nothing but i felt like a pimp nonetheless. the funny part is i only use it to send weird autistic videos to my friends lol.
You're going to make it anon. Just go out more.
>antisocial shut in
>my friends
Send them weird autistic videos and keep whoever gets sick of you last
>normies think im hilarious, might just be my autism lord knows
I experienced the same thing when I started to be more outgoing. Maybe it's because I'm unconventional to them and have a crude sense of humour from 15 years of shitposting.
Bumping for vicarious living and extreme dejannification.
>met a college girl in my friends birthday
>she ask my age, i say im 32
>she replies "oh anon i swear you were 24"
More motivation to eat clean, lift and do HIIT. I dont want to look like people of my age who look like shit
>older cancer patient lookin lady
>really short, has short balding hair.
>athletic build
>always works out with these buff Mexicans, they’re all kinda short
>seems kinda intense as a person
>one day I’m doing deadlifts, she’s doing modified deadlifts next to me
>I pull 4pl8 for 5 reps
>”I’m jealous anon! Good job I can’t even do deadlifts anymore”
>Mexican guy comes up next to me
>they watch me pull 465 for a slow solid rep
>”oh cmon anon you can do it!”
>pulled 465 for 3
>they all give me daps and Pat me on the back
Felt really good. I never usually interact with people in the gym. It was cool to have randoms approach me like that
Tbh this is the stuff I come to read. Not muh Hispanic wife or some 13 year old girl flirted with me.
roll
is gaye meant to be like the yogurt?
I mired a girl last week
>young black girl comes with friend
>obviously her first time at the gym
>has glasses so already a step above the others
>slightly chubby but nothing that can't get fixed
>is actually like 2m tall
If she kept at it and developed some real muscle she'd become and actual wakanda tier goddess
Can you manprostitutes please stop stripping down to your underwear in the hallways when the changingrooms are closed? I will look away and turn my back to you, you're not getting a mire from me!
>at the gym (im the strongest person at my gym) lifting a really heavy amount of weight (probably more than you reading this can lift)
>local gym milf staring at me as i do it
>i look at her and smile
>she smiles back, adjusts her sports bra to show more cleavage
>after im done lifting she comes over, starts talking to me, stealing glances etc
>tell her i gotta go, autistically leave the gym without making a move on her
my virginity is safe... for now
>my virginity is safe... for now
Careful Brother, those hoes are always looking to steal it, might want to invest in a chastity belt just to be sure.
RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRoll
>chilling with my bros at a bar entrance
>a couple of turks walk out speaking turkish
>my friend was like "what language is that"
>of course i have been exposed to copious amounts of soap opera by my grandmother so i know a roach before they even deny the genocide, i would have recognised them by their faces and gnome-like phisiques anyways
>"i think they're turks..."
>i suddenly notice the cute girl that was following them outside
>"... but she's cute" thinking they don't understand my native tongue
>as I say this she turns around and gives me in the words of my friend "the cutests smile ever" as in she understood
>mask my embarassement with a smile back
>i had to pause for a bit to laugh at my friend's "i think she understood you, bro" and she got lost in the crowd
i could have reclaimed Constantinople that night
Underrated
>i know a roach before they even deny the genocide
>be me
>at the mall
>walking past one of those kiosks where people pester you to try and buy something
>they are selling sweets
>guy says “hey bro want some baklava?”
>say no
>he looks me up and down and says “you sure? we got high protein options”
>ignore him because I already said no once
>smiling on the inside at the compliment
Damn those fricks are annoying but that was kinda nice.
>on a bike
>decided to wear my skimpiest, gayest outfit
>strong men smile and cheer at me
>weak men avert their gaze
>teen girls and grannies smile and blush
I usually hike in compression shorts and a bandana. I weigh 250 pounds. Once I passed a couple black girls and they burst out laughing. Because I was so hot
>>”look at mr bodybuilder over here”
your life is not an anime, you dont have a tomboy girl-friend, stop larping moronic weeb
Meds
Some black ladies at the park smiled at me and yelled something indistinguishable as I walked by in a sleeveless hoodie. I smiled and waved back and they all yelled again. Felt good.
I can finally participate in this thread holy shit
>getting food at the local mall
>leaving the food court
>girl holds door open for me as I'm leaving
>I say thank you
>she turns around and says "You look bigger compared to the last time I saw you"
>say thanks but confused at the same time
>ask her if we've met before
>she says that she used to see me at the local college gym all the time
>says it was nice seeing me again
>we part ways
I should have asked for her social media but damn did that feel amazing
Lmao this reminds me of my experiences. I go to 2 gyms nowadays (one more for socializing) and am known to 'know everyone'.
>Be at self-serve gas station
>Can't find bank card (fell between chairs)
>Looking around
>Random dude asks if he can do something for me
>Tell him I'm just looking for my card
>Offers to pay "I see you at the gym all the time anyway :)"
>Go back to my old gym to meet up with some friends there
>Random dudes I don't even recognize anymore start talking to me
>"Hey welcome back man, looking good!" and such, super friendly
>Act friendly back, shoot the shit, they look almost proud that I talk to them
Fun times
your post reminded me that I didn't put my card back into my wallet, thanks bro
You're welcome, anon
I've seen guys walk all across the gym just to ask me for a spot, multiple times. 6 months ago nobody even glanced my way. Do people really like you more the more muscle you have?
I'm getting a lot of mires but turbo autism prevents me from acknowledging these mires when they happen and sabotage any chance I may have had. Also virgin.
just make a move man. it will feel freeing. you said you know you are getting mires. try to embrace it. i don’t know just how autistic you are but i have a piece of advice
>notice grill mirin
>acknowledge it and try to relax if you aren’t already
>stop overthinking
>depending on the setting walk up to her
>simply introduce yourself with a smile
>maintain eye contact and be confident, if you aren’t act like it
now here comes the funny part. you could tell her terrible jokes, as long as she likes you she will laugh at anything you say. the opposite is also true. teasing is key. you should make fun of her (in a harmless way) and she will likely do the same. it creates sexual tension. unless the girl is very confident she is unlikely to take the first steps. traditionally it’s been the man’s job to approach. women will usually give you plenty of hints and signals though, you got to look out for them. if they are interested they will make it very easy for you. It’s up to you to seal the deal.
>try to relax
>stop overthinking
i get what you mean but these are hilariously counterproductive advices
how so? relaxing your body and maintaining proper breathing is not overthinking now is it? if you focus on that you won’t even have the time to overthink.
Saw a girl looking at me at the gym the other day. She didn't break eye contact, it was nice. As usual I looked away and stared down at the floor for the rest of my routine.
Damn. This happens often. Not sure what the proper response is. Every so often I will do a head nod and say hi or “hey, whats up” and they will usually reciprocate but no conversation ensues.
i got lucky one time and the girl had horrendous form so i warned her about that and she started talking a lot then the next day came and i was too nervous to talk to her again
I will roll
I'll take "I LOVE COKE" and "I WILL RAPE U"
this one surprised me
>go on date with girl i've been seeing for the last couple of months on and off
>she has a great slim figure with massive natural milkers
>"anon, I have something I need to tell you"
>"I know you've got a great body and you go to the gym all the time"
>proceeds to rant to me how insecure she is about my physique, saying how she is worried that I can virtually get any girl I want, esp ones that are way fitter than her
>"i don't workout like you and I'm not as fit as those other girls"
>she was worried about this and spoke to her friends about it too
>smashed her that night
fyi I'm probably a 6-7/10 at best, but it was a good unintentional compliment
I've gotten this too from a chick in my hometown, and she thinks I get a new girl every weekend or something when I am gone. She does other similar things, and the pity party is very unattractive.
Also, I am a shy dude probably on the spectrum so I don't know where she gets it. I work out but being a player is all personality, I know slobby friends who usually get the girl instead.
Fake thread homosexual
thats the biggest green light to frick her so good. id invade that pussy like iraq or some shit
guys i genuinely need help, theres a beautiful girl with an amazing body ive seen for the last two weeks at my gym, we constantly lock eyes and she shows her butt to me and poses long story short ITS BECOMING MENTAL TORTURE. I have no clue how to just talk to her even though ive never been more sure of anything that i could easily get with her. the tension is off the charts like ive never had in my life. what do i frickin do champs
Give her a wink, read her reaction. If she green lights you, wait until yours and her set is done, walk up and ask "how you doing today?" the words can be anything they're just filler at this point. If she's receptive of a wink, she'll be receptive of anything. It's simultaneously the safest and most brazen part of the interaction. Criminally underrated and underused move
Can anyone tell me if this is troll advice or legit? I genuinely don’t know.
Idk I have autism, but I don't think winking is that common anymore, I could be wrong tho.
her butt has been entered by hundreds of men. walk up to her and tell her shes ugly
change gym
Play divinity original sin II: definitive edition and accept all seduction prompts
...did you learn anything?
my mom is very fit and outdoorsy. she's like pic related except barely 5 feet tall.
I see men stealing glances and flirting with her all the time.
that's mire right?
Good morning sir!
sir, can I know ur moms number
Ever jerked off thinking about your mom?
I want to have sex with your mother
>animecon with friends (rooming seperately)
>been cutting for a month before to get into character
>middle of body painting my abs
>knock on door
>girls from another room need a big strong man to help
>"shit frick nooo im naked with paint on my abs dont come in"
>open door
>everyone walk the dinosaur
>for reals, girls from another room need help zipping up their maid outfits, zipper is stuck
>frick it whatever let them in and help the cute girl in maid outfit
>later that night
>"omg did you know how ripped anon is? I saw him shirtless in the morning while getting ready"
>>"shit frick nooo im naked with paint on my abs dont come in"
KEK
This happened not too long ago and I promise I am not making up fricking any of this and I wish I was
>at wagecuck grocery store job
>putting up the cat litter containers on the shelves
>woman my age in the aisle
>unintentionally slam one of the litter boxes on the metal cart we use and make her jump
>go "sorry i didnt expect it to make that much noise"
>she said "yeah those things can be heavy:
>"only 25 pounds, not -that- heavy"
>she jokingly goes " 'only'? are you trying to impress me?"
>autism confidence strikes
>"if i was doing that I'd have to lift more"
Now up until this moment we were kinda speaking to each other by only really turning our heads in each other's general direction, after this she turns her whole body to me
>"really?"
>I say "yeah."
>turn around
>walk away
bro, ur just moronic. stop chasing girls and hit the gym.
>Have birthday last weekend
>Going to a restaurant with 2 girls from my gym
>Go to my apartment first with one of them
>She wants to look around
>"You don't REALLY know someone until you've seen how they live"
>Finds a custom made collar that says "Anon's Slave" with a ring on it for leashes and puts it on looking in the mirror
>"Looks good with this outfit, but it's probably worn by millions of girls already"
>Been cutting for a few weeks
>People I haven't seen in a while are at my gyms again
>"you look lean anon, looking great!"
>Constant compliments everywhere I go
>takes girl home
>doesn't frick the soul out of her
/fit/, ladies and gents
guilty
YEAH? I NEVER FRICKING ASKED FOR THIS, OKAY? Lemme tell you a story.
One time, a 5'2" thinspo girl I was friends with invited herself to my house and we ended up cuddling for an hour straight. Even though she had her leg draped over my body, and was groping my chest and telling me how nice I smell, I didn't get the hint. And I had the audacity to wonder why she ghosted me the next day. The 'tism is a b***h. She looked exactly like this but with Romanian features.
>some tables and chairs have to moved around at work
>I stand around not doing anything because I'm lazy
>The hot milf boss tells me to go move the heaviest table because I look strong
>Go move it while thinking about fricking her
Was she mirin' or did she just manipulate me with her female charm?
you didn't bang and she got the job she wanted done done, so draw your conclusions from that
I got mired and she also gets to pay me. I've drawn my conclusions.
>Be me, kinda Chad +30yo
>Went to a class filled with milf mature roasties
>Bough some snacks for them because I wanted to be seen as friendly
>Immediately they ask behind my back if I'm single
So... It is possible to create my coomer-days-dream of having a mature milf harem?
How?
>Went to a class filled with milf mature roasties
What class? Please show me the ways.
>pic related
im pretty friendly and the owner of the gym likes me, so she is cool with me doing exercise with girls.
>pic related now on jpeg
Tbhs that class is pretty hard. Harder than box. The trick?
1) keep doing the exercise even when the instructor gets tired. Its over one hour of exercise.
2) girls use those plastic two pounds pink "dumbels". I fricking use the ones of 25 pounds. after half an hour it sores dude. It really sores.
what does it feel like?
college friend complimented my jacket the other day
Some milf watched me while I showered the other day at the spa
>be me
>lean natty sleeper build
>usually wear loose shirts to work
>it's summer, very hot, and friday
>wear a tight t-shirt to work, physique activated
>every time i walk into a room with a female coworker less than 40 I can see their eyes scanning and lingering on my chest and shoulders
>suddenly aware of how obvious it is when I look at girls cleavage
>be at baby shower
>note every single husband there is tubby or worse
>all of them are drinking
>beer guts galore
>only one fitbro amongst them and he's ripped.
>he's also 5'4" but with an absurdly hot Asian wife
>it's okay, I'm only 5'10
>two of the seven women there are thirstier than I have ever seen
>They are also handsy; so handsy my wife noticed
>she's a sexual camel
>gets it once, doesn't need it again for a year
>she comes on to me when we get home
>I turn her down because I'm not playing that game
>she flips out
>I ignore her
>makes me dinner, asks me what I want for dinner tomorrow, rubs my feet as I'm sitting on the sofa
>still don't have sex with her
you have failed in your choices
What you're doing is unmanly and destructive. When a married person is witholding sex from his/her spouse as a punishment or power move, that is evil and unhealthy for both of you. If you are resentful toward your wife because she is not normally satisfying you, that is something to work out with your wife or together with some kind of counselor.
>Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband. The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife. Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.
Kek no, you can't make someone attracted to someone else if the attractions gone. No amount of counseling is gonna make someone want to actually frick, you'll just get starfish sex. The only reason why the wife wants to frick is because other women found him attractive and she doesn't want him straying to get his needs met. He fricks her for a bit, then the sex dies out again because she's reassured he won't cheat and it's back to dead bedroom. The only thing your religious drivel will do is provide starfish duty sex, it won't make either spouse more attracted to the other.
I'll take it. Anything, I don't care if she's awake or anything.
I'm not that anon but I've been through that shit.
My ex says she had emotional problems and yeah I get it.
She was molested and was giving head to her brothers and strangers(she was adopted, her mother was a frickup too) she's not sure but thinks her adopted dad did stuff to her.
She was stupid and got had by different guys all her teens, no one stuck around to deal with her shit, pump and dump, she got used to it.
Enter me. I love her and she says she loved me too.
After three years she says no more sexual stuff. She doesn't want me to put my hand around her cute hips even. She barely let's me give her peck on lips.
She just keeps at this shit, she wants to fly the coop and go back to her "friends" living like she was a teenager again(we have my daughter) and I work and don't want her dragging my kid around as she goes back and finds herself.
Ok ok, whatever you want, I'll love you anyway, whatever you are going through I'm here.
Eventually I kick her out, become single dad w custody. She disappears for a few years. Im glad she's finding herself, she's homeless being a prostitute, drugs booze.
And now my kid is an adult, married to a good guy, both work, two beautiful and loving kids together, always giving me love every day.
I still can't help but love her mom and pray for her everyday.
Still haven't had a serious relationship with women, lots of boomboom but I just can't do it again and get destroyed emotionally again.
Channel all my struggles into lifting and being healthy.
Be the best anons, wagtmi
terrible woman. had a child and still ran off. No amount of abuse can justify that behavoir when you have a child
then he should have already been divorced
Its cheaper to keep her
imo leaving such a situation would be worth the price
based.
my fat wife is a bit of a sexual camel as well.
finally gets off her ass yesterday to clean, spends upwards of 2 hours in kitchen cleaning.
I go in later, she literally just tossed all my clean tupperwear in the sink and rewashed shit that was already clean, and left the sink more full than it had been.
Zero mires from her.
>using tupperware full of xenoestrogens
Use glass containers instead, troony
Of course she is cause you got married kek. There's nothing you can do, all roads lead to her getting paid.
hum.. it seems that you actively must have options, not only look like you could have options.
Checked.
>gym 4 times a week, don't talk to anyone and stare at the floor with headphones in between sets
>didn't talk to anyone at the climbing gym
>hung out with family for memorial day
Nothing to report this week. Will update if anything changes.
I'm glad to see you're still here anon. Keep them reports coming.
>in grocery store
>see older lady fidgeting with something too tall for her
>ask if she needs help, give her a hand and start walking away
>random guy that was nearby laughs and say "I asked her if she needed help she said no"
>lady says "Well he was more fit and handsome so I let him help me" and walks off laughing
>I say thanks, then chat with the random dude about grilling hotdogs for a few minutes
I know it was a joke but it still felt nice. Kind of a weird thing to say to the other guy but what can you do?
>on holiday in berlin
>setup bumble and leave running in background
>hot model looking qt likes me and makes a cum joke based on my prompts and my shirtless photo
>flirt and send newd photos to eachother
>her banter is good
>go pick her up from a party at 2am to hang out
>wandering around unfamiliar city streets trying to find a bar at 2am
>some holiday or something so everything is closed
>she is mentally disabled, in a very literal way, lisp, poor comprehension, special needs school
>turns out her friends were helping her with the messages
>she says she feels scared and calls her friends to come get her
>i wait with her and her friends come and rescue her from me
>thanks have a good night
also i disregard all mire posts without a picture go frick yourselfs
I'd rather disregard mires from drooling morons lmao
when you've made it the funny mires are more interesting than getting checked out by some old roastie in a grocery store, they stop registering after a while
aww poor girl, did you guys speak after?
>BEST FRIENDS
Pretty wholesome honestly, seems out of place
I only get interest from women when I'm with a friend. When I'm alone, I get completely ignored for the most part, it's pretty funny.
>working in the warehouse
>colleague who ive only talked about work with asks me if ill be training today
>then asks how often i train
A cute Mexican cashier at HEB once told me she liked my haircut the same day I got it cut.
Rolling, but I don't want anyone thinking I'm a homoqueer
if you want mires just get your weighted pullup/chinup over 2pl8s... at this point i do chinups for 5x6 with over 50 kg and i get comments/compliments almost everytime i do them(not even counting people just straight up staring at you while you do your set)
Best way to train that? I did some today with 24kg, 2x5 but didnt have clean reps the 3rd set. Do I do lower weight and more reps or go for 2-3 reps and more sets?
idk i ve done sets 3-6 and reps 5-8 and try to add weight when i can but never compromise form if i cant do the rep, i cant
No mires for me 🙁
>Walk around shirtless at the beach
>I walk by a group of guys
>One of them says "No bodybuilder allowed around here, bro!"
best mire ever
>tfw all mires ceased when the balding started
>tfw all mires increased when the balding started
You can't fool us Andrew Tate, now go to bed.
>she starts giggling and i compliment her
>and i compliment her
Shit test utterly failed. Way to out yourself as having no experience with women lol. The chase is over for her. High value men who have options do not throw out compliments like that right away. You are just like every other simp now. Crashed and burned, son.
PUA cringe mentality. I once complimented a girl and the only thing I said was "That new hair color suits you!" or something cause she dyed her hair.
Later that week at a party she was sitting on my lap and I could feel the warmth of her pussy through my pants. We went somewhere quiet and she kissed me.
Depends on the girl and the ones who "shit test" or reject you because of a compliment were not worth your time anyway. You can only control what you do at the end of the day so have fun with it.
No he's not wrong but it's entirely dependent on the compliment. If OP is saying how beautiful she is then he's correct, that's what every other basic b***h man does. Complimenting her on her outfit, or like you did with her hair color is fine and actually makes you stand out and she feels like your paying attention to other things other than looks
What you're saying is fair. That guy though is advocating for basically being sparse with your compliments if at all to maintain "high value". One should compliment a person if they feel they deserve it.
As you say, it shouldn't be generic either. This is the real value and bonus is it's not manipulative and hard to maintain. Social interactions are already stress filled enough as is. Relaxed and confident is the way.
i have a female friend that is always looking at me like pic related and touching my arm etc. multiple people have said we are like an old married couple. but then other times we talk about each others dating lives and stuff and that makes me think the other way. awfully confusing
>buy milsurp shirt
>tell a woman that I like it because it makes me look slim
>"but you ARE slim!"
Best I've got for now. Ottermode here I come
>on train home from uni
>"hey is this spot free?". Really cute girl my age pointing to spot to the opposite of me with the most genuine smile I've ever seen
>"yeah go ahead"
>During maybe 10 - 15 mins we always smile when our eyes met (see you later virgins)
>she gets off at her station, even wishes me a nice evening
it really seemed like she was interested but I was too much of a chicken to strike up a convo or ask for her number. Never has anything like this happened to me so I didn't know how to react. Started lifting ~3 months ago, i wonder if it helped but I do feel like my confidence went up.
>Constantly run into girls giving me obvious signs
>Standing super close, eyeing me up, big goofy smile while I'm talking to them, lots of eye contact, approaching me for random questions and then doing that thing where they stand there and stare at you because they actually just want you to talk to them
>Never do anything with it because I'm moronic
How do I free myself of this hell?
Try to strike a conversation with them and try to genuinely(or pretend to) be interested in talking to them, you're gonna fail the first few times but after a while you'll slowly get the hang of it.
The only people who approach me and do that are lonely old men and homosexuals.
Practice making short pointless but genuine (small talk)conversation with everyone you run into. Gas station cashier, chipotle food scooper, random people you find yourself nearby. Then when you are in that situation with a girl you know how to start and keep a conversation about anything going. And if it's a brief encounter you want to last longer, ask for her number. Otherwise you'll regret not asking
>have garage gym
>workout with door open during warmer months
>neighbor has a 16 year old daughter
>working out one day
>catch daughter watching me
>she was hiding behind their basketball hoop
>when i look back she was gone
>her dad told me she said she wishes he was strong like me
Think I got me a semi e-girl gf kek (i'm kidding fbi agent reading this i have a gf)
what i would do for the opportunity to groom a tomboy highschool girl
>go to grocery store with loose jeans and a form fitting t-shirt, small waist big breasts big hips
>walking around with cart buying my stuff
>older or frumpy women either jealousy stare or avoid their gaze
>havw a chat with cashier, buy my stuff and leave
First time I feel good about my body in a long time.
L O N D O N
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damn <3 congrats tho!!
YWNBAW
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Yeah you're right, I don't have children yet.
I can cum inside you and fix that. Offer expires when this thread dies.
>be me
>get mired
>go to IST to talk about it
>too late in the thread to get any (you)s
roll
>leg day
>someone using the squat rack
>decide to do some deadlifts in a corner looking toward the mirror
>mirror in front of me and to my right
>only have my left and my back open
>girl parks on my left
>inbetween sets I get on my phone
>I can see her walking toward me and back looking at my direction
>ignore her and keep lifting
I was having a rough day so I didn't feel like even looking at her face. Hopefully she was attractive and not a landwhale.