My boyfriend dumped me because I put on some weight, said he couldn’t be with a bigger girl, due to him being a gym rat and his friends also. He said he loved me, but he couldn’t love someone who didn’t love themselves, who didn’t look after their body. I suffer from binge eating disorder and a few mental health issues since I was young, I’m currently 21. I get therapy and I’m trying to love myself, but since he broke my heart, my binge eating has worsened. And I can’t seem to stop hating myself for allowing myself to get to the stage I’m at with my body :/
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If his friend's opinions were more important to him than you, then he didn't love you and you've lost nothing except a drain on your time and mental health. You're young and growing as a person and you will find better things and people to devote yourself to
Organize lots of fun things with friends and they'll tell you how much they love you even if you can't manage it yourself
What is the point of reposting a dogshit reddit thread here post by post? Are you moronic or something? Shitty bait
didn't read
fat pigs literally aren't human
Grown adults don't do that. He is a shallow immature baby and you are better off without him
Take the time to feel your feelings. He was an immature jerk, but a broken heart is a broken heart, and you're allowed to be sad. But when you feel ready, focus on learning to love yourself. He claimed he can't be with someone who "doesn't love themselves." I assumed he implied that being thin/"healthy" = the only way to love yourself.
He's wrong. Prove him wrong.
Love yourself so fully that no one else's opinion can shatter your devotion. Relationships can be temporary, but you're in YOUR body forever. It will change over time, sure. You make get smaller. You may get bigger. You may get weaker or stronger. Regardless, it is yours.
Cherish it. Your body is the beautiful vessel that makes you human, alive- that lets you experience the world. You are so young! You have so much left to experience! Your body is going to carry you through life! So what if you're overweight? So what if you're not thin or dont work out at the gym? Being thin doesn't make you healthier and it doesn't make you worth being loved more than any other body.
When the time is right, you will find someone who loves you for everything that you are. Your personality, your soul, your dreams, your heart, and your body. To them, you will be a work of art. And they will make sure you know it, every single day. And, if losing weight and getting toned is something YOU want to do, they will help and support you through it. Until you meet that person, take care of yourself.
You're going to be just fine and you're doing fine. Forgive yourself. Love yourself. You are loved.
This is wonderful advice. I wish I could upvote this a million times. And that someone had said the same to me when I was 21 and got dumped for “being fat”.
Prove. Him. Wrong. There is SO much good stuff, better than him stuff, ahead of you, OP
If you got fat, that's your own fault and responsibility. Few men want to frick fat cows (only desperate men, maybe).
I'll need something confirming you're a girl so I can give proper advice otherwise I'd be wasting my time for a troll
>hop on israelitegle
>copy/paste OP's post
>see result
https://www.reddit.com/r/PlusSize/comments/156ts18/feeling_a_bit_low_within_myself/
Go back.
If you actually want to lose weight and do what you're told without b***hing,
For all other inquiries,
> I suffer from binge eating disorder and a few mental health issues since I was young, I’m currently 21
You are broken, kys and try again.
Your exBF was an immature AH. You’re better off without him in the long run. Focus on getting your mental health stabilized.
Why is it that if someone is plus size they must not “love themselves” or “don’t take care of themselves”? That’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard. I love myself, nobody loves me like I do. I take care of my body as best I can. My body is made different from everyone else’s body, and responds to food and outward stimulus differently than anyone else’s body. I have medical issues that make me both gain weight and make it difficult to lose weight. These issues are at the genetic level, not my choices. So that’s BS. That guy was a mistake in your life, and that’s okay, we can learn from our mistakes. Anyone who tells you that you don’t love yourself or don’t take care of yourself because of your weight, is a moron. You deserve better. Binge eating is normal after a break up. Keep up with your therapy and talk about it with your therapist. It’s okay to have bad days. You are going to be okay.
Why is it that if someone is plus size they must not “love themselves” or “don’t take care of themselves”? That’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard. I love myself, nobody loves me like I do. I take care of my body as best I can. My body is made different from everyone else’s body, and responds to food and outward stimulus differently than anyone else’s body. I have medical issues that make me both gain weight and make it difficult to lose weight. These issues are at the genetic level, not my choices. So that’s BS. That guy was a mistake in your life, and that’s okay, we can learn from our mistakes. Anyone who tells you that you don’t love yourself or don’t take care of yourself because of your weight, is a moron. You deserve better. Binge eating is normal after a break up. Keep up with your therapy and talk about it with your therapist. It’s okay to have bad days. You are going to be okay.
Meh bait
Oh, I'm so sorry that you're going through this That was a really cruel thing for him to say, and the reality is that even if it's (his perception of what is) "true," it likely has more to do with who he is as a person (shallow? Insecure? caves to peer pressure?) than who you are or what your body looks like. But just because he was not able to take responsibility for his decision (he's blaming you to absolve himself from any guilt or bad feelings you or he feels), does NOT mean you should take responsibility for this!
I know its hard to have perspective while you're still grieving - and it's ok to be sad, to be struggling and feeling bad - but this will be a good thing, someday. He's setting you free to be loved by someone who will really mean it when they say it, and it will be a blessing in disguise someday- it just takes time. Breakups don't get any easier as you get older, but you get stronger and wiser because of them. "With every goodbye, you learn."Take very good care of yourself, and know that it's ok to ask for help and love and support from people close to you. You did not deserve to be treated like crap, this is not your fault, and you have nothing to be ashamed of here.
These replies are more of a bait than the OP itself...
>I suffer from binge eating disorder and a few mental health issues since I was young
He dodged a bullet right there. You have chosen food over him. What else did you except?
I'm sorry your boyfriend broke up with you because of your weight gain. He absolutely could have a plus-size girlfriend while being a gym rat. It's rare, but those types of couples exist. He didn't want to be with you because you gained weight, which honestly, considering how much our bodies change throughout our lives it sounds like he did you a favor. Like, unless someone dedicates all their free time to their physical health their body never stays the same. Please, take the time to grieve the loss of the relationship, and don't take it out on yourself. You deserve to be loved and feel happy.
Sounds like a skill issue
I want frick to you babe
Sounds like he did you a favor. Bodies change throughout our lives. If he can’t understand or accept that, he’s delusional and also a jerk. I’m so sorry honey. You’re young and have so much life and love ahead of you I promise.
explain to the folks at home what being a fat undisciplined lard is
I said the same things when i dumped my ex. No fatties allowed sorry not sorry. If a man gets dumped b.c hes too fat, he would fix himself. Meanwhile you, a woman, choose to binge eat even more
I'm sorry this happened. Assuming you don't care about or for yourself is a total cop out on his part. It's one of the ways fat phobics make themselves feel justified in their prejudice. " it's really for you and your own good that I make this sacrifice...blah,blah." It's all crap, and you have just lost the most important weight possible, one shitty ,shallow, scared, cucked by his friends, boyfriend.
Let yourself be sad, eat if you need to, but take yourself outside for walks somewhere green, a park maybe. Animals help. Caring for something else, a plant even, can take you out of your head for awhile. Tell your friends you need them to keep you busy with fun stuff. You are loved. Never forget it.