You'd break your hands and wrists punching a lion, you fucking retard. They're built different. They fight bison and other lions for fucks sake and you think you can hurt one with your fragile human hands that are built for fine motor skills?
Put it this way - all a lion could do is bite and swipe. Ever heard of dodging? I can bite and swipe as well as punch, kick, headbutt, choke, break limbs, gouge, stomp. It probably wouldn't be close
>*swipes left on you*
Fucking kek'd and check'd, and, of course... underrated because this website has been raied by newfag normies and mulatto perm'd out dyel zoomers
I think they can run like 15 to 20 mph. They aren't no cheetah but faster than any human in short bursts. Humans only really have four advantages against animals 1 technology 2 team work 3 ability to throw fast moving objects like baseballs 4 long distance running. Humans can long run I think all animals on the planet. Short run we are dead.
>more long distance running bullshit
Ever thought about this for 5 minutes?
Do you think even an Olympic level athlete could out distance a horse?
Any kind of horse or similar animal for that matter, impalas, zebras, deer, etc.
This meme that humans slowly ran down every other animal needs to die, it applied to maybe a few different species across the world
>This meme that humans slowly ran down every other animal needs to die,
Yeah even if humans physically could I cannot think of a more retarded way to hunt.
You can concede that humans can outrun lost animals on the planet in certain environments due to our endurance and heat dissipation without believing that persistence hunting was ever an important evolutionary strategy. Both can be true at the same time.
Also, humans have beaten horses at marathons, though horses win most of the time, and they are the highest tier of long distance running animal in terms of endurance.
>Do you think even an Olympic level athlete could out distance a horse?
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Man_versus_Horse_Marathon
we're on the board, at least
>he doesn't know about the human vs horse marathons
Modern humans are at best still significantly inferior to our hunter gatherer ancestors. Idk why u retards are so against the idea of persistent hunting, maybe it makes u feel bad for being a fat lard who can't even move yet alone do what he was designed to do.
>This meme that humans slowly ran down every other animal needs to die, it applied to maybe a few different species across the world
Are you fucking retarded?
There are still tribes doing this shit TODAY.
And yes, it applies to animals that: >Have four legs, which is over twice as INEFFICIENT than moving with two legs >Cannot sweat as much as humans, need to stop and pant to over heat >Cannot carry water
Which is obviously an absurdly large amount of animals.
Most horses go 20 miles a day. If a human can do more they can beat most horses. So yes I have thought of it. And as others have said horses are like the biggest competition in long distance running. So regardless humans still have a very top tier skill vs animals on this planet. Guess you can't count aquatics. They are faster underwater, but with mammals humans dominate.
Speaking of, why do these """"fights"""" always nerf the fuck out of humans. >Oh you can't use technology because you just can't okay
Fuck you yes I can, humans made that shit fair and square.
Put it this way - all a lion could do is bite and swipe. Ever heard of dodging? I can bite and swipe as well as punch, kick, headbutt, choke, break limbs, gouge, stomp. It probably wouldn't be close
Sure. How about you do a rehearsal with shitbull first and post it here? We need some new material for the shitbull threads.
You would break your fist before the lion even felt anything. People don't understand how different the morphology is on animals. Not to mention most people can't even thrown a real punch.
I couldn't beat a lion in a bare hands fight, but I know people who could. Yuros don't realize that while most americans are dysgenic, some of us are ubermensch. Seven foot 6 inches (225cm), weigh 300 lbs all muscle (like 130kg), and can literally lift cars or bend steel. There are reports of people fucking killing grizzlies with their bare hands.
also when I say lift cars I don't mean an overhead press I mean like picking it up off the back wheels and moving it over a foot or two with much difficulty, to be clear.
Since we're talking about tales of this kind my grandpa was known for OHPing pic rel. Sounded like bullshit to me but I've seen pictures and he was a 6'4 giant in a place where the average height was maybe 5'6 back in his day. He could also crush walnuts between his thumb and index finger.
I can bend steel and i weigh 140 lbs. I think it's a mental exercise as much as it is physical. Once you overcome the doubt the steel just softens in your hands. Idk how else to describe it.
Anyone got the "I could beat an elephant in a fight" copypasta? The one where he dark souls's the elephant by staying behind it and avoiding its back kicks?
move the chimp to above wolf
kangaroo/wolf is where I'd top out, I think. I don't have a sense of scale for how big wolves are but I've seen cunts mog roos.
Roos are tough but they kind of give you a fair idea of where and how to stand with their treat pose. Wolves are quadrupeds and will attempt to knock you down and go for the jugular. They're not as retarded when it comes to fighting and killing. They're predators after all.
>crocodile species not listed
??
Anyways. An adult male beats all of these except elephant lion bear chimp and rilla
Chimp is way easier to beat than a wolf. They're shit at doing fatal damage, they're strength is beyond overrated, and they're small. The reason you see mauling stories but not dying stories of fucking elderly women getting attacked by gangs of chimps is because they have no lethality and their only way of hunting is grabbing shit and drawing and quartering and eating it alive.
Wolves have one weapon
Chimps have 5
Those fuckers can sink their teeth and jerk you back with 4 extremities ripping off whatever is in his mouth. Not to mention they have a tendency to pull your balls
So what.
Chimps are small and can be manhandled, and wolves actually know how to kill. Apes are far weaker in physicality and mindset than actual predatory carnivores. Gorillas get killed by leopards, monkeys get killed by tiny ferrets.
A Human beats a similar percentile chimp 90% of the time, Chimps cant kick, chimps cant punch, are weaker and the size of a dwarf.
Theres this retarded view that Humans are some weak animal and could fight of anything, mainly perpetuated by animal loving betas and women.
3 weeks ago
Anonymous
Chimps are all muscle. They are very strong. >chinp gives man a lift.gif
3 weeks ago
Anonymous
Pound for pound they're not much stronger than humans. Absolute strength they're much weaker.
3 weeks ago
Anonymous
Chimps are stronger pound for pound because they are perma 0% body fat, but in raw strength, humans are going to be stronger because we on average weigh more.
Also, strength is only useful if you can transfer that to an attack all chimps can do is swipe and awkwardly pound (and bite ofc) which are very inefficient compared to punching and kicking
I'd legit want your dumb asses to fight a chimp now. You'd deserve the outcome for being this moronic.
3 weeks ago
Anonymous
Chimps are stronger pound for pound because they are perma 0% body fat, but in raw strength, humans are going to be stronger because we on average weigh more.
Also, strength is only useful if you can transfer that to an attack all chimps can do is swipe and awkwardly pound (and bite ofc) which are very inefficient compared to punching and kicking
3 weeks ago
Anonymous
>grabs your arm >cracks your forearm bone with straight up grip strength >rips your shoulder out of socket
You are retarded if you think you stand a chance.
3 weeks ago
Anonymous
You're fucking retarded if that's the best response you could come come with, reasons addressed previously.
[...]
I'd legit want your dumb asses to fight a chimp now. You'd deserve the outcome for being this moronic.
I wish I could, I would destroy it and eat its ball sack.
3 weeks ago
Anonymous
>Chimps cant kick, chimps cant punch
neither can the vast majority human anon. not well, anyways.
3 weeks ago
Anonymous
You don’t need to do it well, fight a chimp is like fighting a dwarf with downsyndrome, most people could do it.
species not listed
I assume probably either a nile or saltie, neither of which a human can take on in the water. If it’s on land then maybe, but you’d still get fucked up. In water, game over.
They probably don't realize how different fighting bare handed, without clothing nor weapons is compared to the opposite. I am sure most able bodied men with a knive and winter attire could easily beat every animal up to the gorilla. At that point the difference in strength is just too great.
>t. never been homeschooled
i was isolated for 8 years of my life because i was homeschooled, but you, some retarded city slicker moron that saw his favorite neocon politician tweet about how based homeschooling is because of some trannies in public school, definitely know better than I.
If you look at the beginning at the video you can see this guy only has 3.5 fingers left. Meaning this shit has probably happened at least twice before....
whats the right move after your finger is bitten by a lion? ofcourse, the finger is done for, but how do you make sure it doesn't pull out the entire tendon with it?
What would actually have happened if he didn't try to pull free? The lion would wander off with his hand in his mouth, turning the black into meat cubes? No but seriously, would he just be pressed in the fence while the lion munches on his hand a couple meters wandered off? I guess the lion would have let go if he didn't struggle after a minute.
I think its possible.I just get so fucking angry sometimes I fly into a rage and lose myself, this boosts my strength. The lion just have his animal instincts while I have this extra surge of power.
>I DON’T HAVE A GIRLFRIEND!!! FUCK YOU LION!!!! RAAAAAA!! >gets slapped with a clawed paw, all rage is now leaking onto the ground in the form of blood, piss, and shit >dies
question is about fistfight, lions don't have fists or even thumbs so easy win for many men, the only enemy is fear
there are many cases where human was attackes by a shark or by a bearm simple jab to the nose made these animals shake in fear and flee. Provided that the lion's mouth is secured with a muzzle and the lion ain't female with baby lions it is absolutely possible to win
As a over 3 plate bench presser, I am quite sure my pressing strength makes sure any punches to the head would get him confused. So I would keep my distance and only go for the blow when I know he can't get me (as I know it would be deadly). Once I got one or two hits, I would take the opportunity to do a deadlift choke hold (I mean, locking his neck with my arm and performing a deadlift with the purpose of taking his base off, so he would be helpless). A few seconds of no blood flow to be brain and he would be a goner.
he would lazily swipe you with his clawed paw, skinning you alive. benchmorons are delusional, all the exercise chemicals have gone straight to their brain and they think that they're invincible
yes they would win the fight by default of having the ability to throw a punch,but the lion would maul them to death immediately after,NOT using anything close to what resembles a fist,therefore you win the fist fight by default.
Just at the end of ww2 he aided on a ambush on some robbers/looters that failed so they came to kill him,at first they wanted to kill him with bombs and threw one at the front of the stable he was in, he hated bombs and didint want to die to one so he rushed out shooting everywhere and got killed standing.
We dont know much else as the new government just executed them no trial.
>Dude you are all HECKIN wrong. You can't beat a feckin heckin flufferino simba because THE FUCKING SCIENCE says YOU CANT. DONT FUCKING EVEN TRY. JUST ROLL OVER IF YOU SEE A LIO-AAAAAAAACK NO WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING RETARDED CHUD HES GOING TO DEVOUR YOU ALIV- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO WHAT THE FUCK DONT JUMP INTO THE CAGE NO YOU SICK BASTARD DONT BASH HIS SKULL OPEN WITH A CLUB NO WHAT ARE YOU DOIIIIIIIING OH MY SCIENCE THIS CANT BE HAPPENING WHAT THE FUCK AM I GOING TO TELL BILL AND MELINDA? NOOOOOO DONT WEAR THE HECKIN PELT ON YOUR HEAD YOU ARE NOT HERCULES HERCULES ISNT REA-AAAAAAAAACK
You can just throw rocks and sticks at it. Assuming you start from a decently long distance and it's a semi dense environment like a forest with places to hide or climb and shit to pick up, then the average fit man could probably win.
except no you can't because then you're using weapons and it's no longer a fistfight or w/e. that said you'd think it'd be hard as fuck to hit a lion with meaningful force outside of its lunging range if it's already running at you. Surely at longer ranges a moving lion will just dodge, right?
Weapons assume you bring a premade tool to the fight. Using rocks and sticks is just using the environment to your advantage, no different from climbing a tree or throwing sand in the lion's eyes or hiding in a hole etc. In an open field the lion would win but in a dense environment like a forest it could be 50/50
How do you think homo sapiens defeated their predators?
A weapon in the scenario of a fistfight is using anything but your own body to attack. Yes that even includes throwing sand. Climbing a tree is fine imo, just don't rip it out of the fucking ground and swing it like a club. >How do you think homo sapiens defeated their predators?
I agree with your implication, but the poll is asking about a fistfight not if people could win a fight using sticks spears and rocks like our ancestors did.
lmao bro just shut the fuck up. Just because you're a moron that is afraid of cats doesnt mean a normal 6'3 male is going to die fighting a grown pussy. have a nice day.
>Yin Yang fish (Chinese: 陰陽魚, 糖醋活魚, 呼叫魚; also called dead-and-alive fish) is a dish where a live, scaled fish (usually carp) with its head wrapped in ice cubes is oil-fried whole. The fish is then covered in sauce and served on a plate where its head continues to twitch even after its body has been cooked (likely due to remnant electrical impulses after death).[1][2][3][4] >It was invented by a Taiwanese whose restaurant in Chiayi, Taiwan sparked outrage when it began serving the dish in 2007, with a city official and members of the public criticizing the cruelty of the dish.[5] Following public outcry, the dish was subsequently removed from the menu and banned in Taiwan.[6][1] A video of a dish in 2009 was condemned by the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals calling a video showcasing it "disgusting".[7] In 2021 the dish had been adopted in mainland China.[1]
Can we be serious for one second. This must be the very worst way to go out. Mother watching child get eaten alive. Child watching mother eaten alive.
Motherhood is the central bond upon which our mammalian lineage is founded.
It seems wrong on a level transcending ordinary violent death. This is spiritually wrong.
If we've agreed to a fist fight and the lion bites me, then he is disqualified for not following the rules of engagement and I win on a technicality. gg too ez. I'm smarter than lions, so we gotta use our intellect to overcome their strength advantage.
The only way is to mentally/spiritually dominate them into obedience. Otherwise, they will shred just about any human. There is a story of a guy in India. A really buff monk that would wander through the jungles punching tigers in the face as part of his spiritual practice. The face punch would immediately humble and scare the attacking tiger. He was the kind of guy that could punch through bricks. Not a lot of people like that. Certainly not 8% of the population
I believe this is somewhat true,a loose pitbull sprinted towards me and fucked off because I stopped walking,stood still and just stared at it,it calmed down and walked away,just told myself it would do no good if I freaked out in that situation.
I probably could. It really just depends on the speed and technique. Imagine Bruce Lee -- he couldn't take many hits from a heavyweight champion, but he could definitely one or two hit KO them with a good kung-fu move.
>Imagine Bruce Lee -- he couldn't take many hits from a heavyweight champion, but he could definitely one or two hit KO them with a good kung-fu move.
heh
These fuckers scare me more in Europe than bears, wolves, pumas, vipers, witches and "economic immigrants".
They sliced open my friends leg so bad he needed to go to the ER.
what the fuck, seriously? I some some article posted on here a while back where an eastern yuro got lost while hunting and survived for days by drinking rainwater from his shoe, would hide from these little boar things, etc. I thought the hiding from the little boar things was just him being a goober or something.
Yeah, seriously. They ran him down. He didn't have time to ready his bow. They ran him through with their tusks and sliced up his leg real bad. He went to the ER and got like a dozen stitches. He didn't see any babies. I thought it might explain why they behaved so aggresively. But anyway, after seeing vipers, pumas, wolves and economic immigrants in the wild.. Boars and islamists scare me the most.
I want to. It just takes forever to get one. You have to jump through so many hoops. My family, friends and employer have to vouch for me. I am in the process. All I have now is an excalibur crossbow, a barnett compound bow, a ksb traditional bow, pepper spray and hunting knives.
I am so, so, so jealous of your freedom you have in the USA. Never! Never give it up! Fight any change to your freedom!
extremely based, but low test loser beta males that were bullied in school will hate on the husky for being aggressive, dominant and more of a man than these gays will ever be in their entire lives
Or they observed humans picking up the cone before.
Because he picked it up and then kept walking does imply that he wasn't just playing. It's either what you said or what I said.
Some workers were striking over having to clean up the trash or something, it was a protest. Trash being on the ground was literally a part of the protest. So it's just the typical "pick up this trash" bullying, but obviously the way trash is being picked up is a part of the protest.
god white people are so pathetic, why even bother at this point? why stick around picking shit up when these morons are just going to throw it out again? what does this gay think he is going to achieve? you can bet his pasty ass is thinking of all the hecking updoots he's going to get on reddit for his "good" behavior. what a fucking tool
this,leave those things to their own devices,they clearly dont want any help in anything since they're obviously so smart and capable of impulse control,long term planning and focus on a massive scale kek!
tigers are the ones that really surprise people with their size. or at least thei size surprised me. I probably spent a majority of my life thinking they were smaller than lions.
I got attacted by a mountian lion once but before i punched him in the chin and knocked him out in mid air
So i would say yes, it's all about getting the knock out punch before he pounces on you
I could.
Because I believe.
this
simply will it into existence. if you fail its because you didn't believe/will hard enough
Lol theyd just roll downhill at it. Poor lion never stood a chance.
Well, how is the lion gonna punch me when he doesn't have hands?
Literally this.
>fist fight
Lion can't punch so he has to sit there and take it until he quits. Thems the rules.
>any other fight
You're fucked.
A lion does not have hands and cannot make a fist. Therefore it loses any fistfight by default. Checkmate atheists
Came here to say the same thing
You'd break your hands and wrists punching a lion, you fucking retard. They're built different. They fight bison and other lions for fucks sake and you think you can hurt one with your fragile human hands that are built for fine motor skills?
>bison
Do they really anon?
Buffalo. Bison is the word for north american buffalo. There aren't any north american buffalo in Africa.
punch him in the eye and penis
>You'd break your hands and wrists punching a lion
I wouldn't cuz I don't have soft sóy hands like you.
Show it to us
Put it this way - all a lion could do is bite and swipe. Ever heard of dodging? I can bite and swipe as well as punch, kick, headbutt, choke, break limbs, gouge, stomp. It probably wouldn't be close
*swipes left on you*
>*swipes left on you*
Fucking kek'd and check'd, and, of course... underrated because this website has been raied by newfag normies and mulatto perm'd out dyel zoomers
rent free
All I need to do to make you want to KYS is to slick your hair back.
Retarded ass zoomers think they're smart, hiding their busted ass hairlines behind those broccoli perms
the fact that you're here to say rent free just proves it's not rent free at all and that it's a real problem
*swipes right on you*
omg is that pic real?
Only hope is to get on its back and strangle it
I'm laughing so hard that I'm crying. Thanks for this one anon
I'm pretty confident I would beat a lion in a licensed boxing match.
fistfight? no. grappling however seems trivial against catlike creatures
A lion would be too scared to fight me, because it will sense my killing intent.
I wonder what percentage of that 8% have had sex. Something tells me all of them have.
ENTER
*jogs away from this fat fuck*
whoopsie not so strong now mr fatty are we
>he doesn't know
I think they can run like 15 to 20 mph. They aren't no cheetah but faster than any human in short bursts. Humans only really have four advantages against animals 1 technology 2 team work 3 ability to throw fast moving objects like baseballs 4 long distance running. Humans can long run I think all animals on the planet. Short run we are dead.
>they can run like 15 to 20 mph
man they're really fast
>Teleports behind it
"Heh. Nothing personnel fatty."
>shurgs your bullets off
Try again, Donny boy
>more long distance running bullshit
Ever thought about this for 5 minutes?
Do you think even an Olympic level athlete could out distance a horse?
Any kind of horse or similar animal for that matter, impalas, zebras, deer, etc.
This meme that humans slowly ran down every other animal needs to die, it applied to maybe a few different species across the world
>This meme that humans slowly ran down every other animal needs to die,
Yeah even if humans physically could I cannot think of a more retarded way to hunt.
>Why fight bigger animal if I can just track it at walking pace until collapses
>me and my tribe are hungry, we need food right now
>let's slowly walk after this animal for three days
moron they hunted and kept storage, they didn't just fucking go out and hunt daily when they got hungry
>kids are hungry again Grug
>go grab that side of mammoth out of the freezer
Imagine not knowing the original purpose behind smoked/jerked meat.
>Prehistoric humans didn't know what salt or smoking food was
Retard
You can concede that humans can outrun lost animals on the planet in certain environments due to our endurance and heat dissipation without believing that persistence hunting was ever an important evolutionary strategy. Both can be true at the same time.
Also, humans have beaten horses at marathons, though horses win most of the time, and they are the highest tier of long distance running animal in terms of endurance.
>are the highest tier of long distance running animal in terms of endurance
No, sled dogs are, even more than wild dogs like African ones
Humans can outrun any animal when you're in Africa and it's very hot cause we can sweat and animals can't and by human I really mean Black folks
LOL put a sled dog against a human in 30c heat and see who wins
Conversely, put a sled dog against human in -10c cold.
wait no you can't do that
Humans can make clothes :O
Good luck long distance running with 5kg of clothes and shoes, plus the wind resistance from all that puffiness.
why is this an arguement, they weren't even hunted lol.
>Do you think even an Olympic level athlete could out distance a horse?
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Man_versus_Horse_Marathon
we're on the board, at least
Look up "persistence hunting"
I know what it's called dipshit, it's dated science akin to guessing what created earth
>he doesn't know about the human vs horse marathons
Modern humans are at best still significantly inferior to our hunter gatherer ancestors. Idk why u retards are so against the idea of persistent hunting, maybe it makes u feel bad for being a fat lard who can't even move yet alone do what he was designed to do.
>why don't we get a band together and spend two days and 10,000 calorie each so we can slowly catch this deer that will give us maybe 40,000 calorie
https://www.journals.uchicago.edu/doi/10.1086/708810
Hunts took about 3-6 hours and deer travel in groups.
>This meme that humans slowly ran down every other animal needs to die, it applied to maybe a few different species across the world
Are you fucking retarded?
There are still tribes doing this shit TODAY.
And yes, it applies to animals that:
>Have four legs, which is over twice as INEFFICIENT than moving with two legs
>Cannot sweat as much as humans, need to stop and pant to over heat
>Cannot carry water
Which is obviously an absurdly large amount of animals.
Fucking retard. Read a history and biology book.
imagine being so retarded that the best thing you can come up with is run behind some animal for days
Most horses go 20 miles a day. If a human can do more they can beat most horses. So yes I have thought of it. And as others have said horses are like the biggest competition in long distance running. So regardless humans still have a very top tier skill vs animals on this planet. Guess you can't count aquatics. They are faster underwater, but with mammals humans dominate.
Speaking of, why do these """"fights"""" always nerf the fuck out of humans.
>Oh you can't use technology because you just can't okay
Fuck you yes I can, humans made that shit fair and square.
Man, that's a big boy.
Sure. How about you do a rehearsal with shitbull first and post it here? We need some new material for the shitbull threads.
>ayoOo craka gibs me dat
Fist fights aren't teeth and claw fights. I would fuck a lion up because he couldn't hit me back without breaking the rules.
This is why polls are dumb. People can interpret questions in some wild, unpredictable ways.
You would break your fist before the lion even felt anything. People don't understand how different the morphology is on animals. Not to mention most people can't even thrown a real punch.
>uppercuts you right in the nuts
what now you stupid cat
I could just wail on his eyes until he goes blind bet you didn't think o that
I couldn't beat a lion in a bare hands fight, but I know people who could. Yuros don't realize that while most americans are dysgenic, some of us are ubermensch. Seven foot 6 inches (225cm), weigh 300 lbs all muscle (like 130kg), and can literally lift cars or bend steel. There are reports of people fucking killing grizzlies with their bare hands.
also when I say lift cars I don't mean an overhead press I mean like picking it up off the back wheels and moving it over a foot or two with much difficulty, to be clear.
Since we're talking about tales of this kind my grandpa was known for OHPing pic rel. Sounded like bullshit to me but I've seen pictures and he was a 6'4 giant in a place where the average height was maybe 5'6 back in his day. He could also crush walnuts between his thumb and index finger.
I need to train grip strength.
>There are reports of people fucking killing grizzlies with their bare hands.
that's all they are though, reports. stories. fables. LIES.
t. grizzly coping seething and malding
A total fabrication
I can bend steel and i weigh 140 lbs. I think it's a mental exercise as much as it is physical. Once you overcome the doubt the steel just softens in your hands. Idk how else to describe it.
All I'm reading is that 92% are pussy ass chickens for all I know
TEST YOUR MIGHT
>that giant drop with eagle
don't know why this made me laugh.
A true american would never hurt an eagle
Damn us bros, 24% of your men can't fight a fuckin rat
That would be extremely antisemitic.
For you.
You look like a big guy
>king cobra
>23%
You have a 0% chance of surviving a bite from a cobra without being within a few minutes of a hospital
*tie the cobra*
game over tube bro
*spits venom at you*
CGI
venmon doens't do anything unless it enters your blood (idiot)
they aim at your eyes dumbass.
You can still win the fight if you kill it before passing out and dying yourself.
That's not a win that's a tie
It's a win if he dies first.
That would depend on the referee.
so don't get bit? Fucking retard
nevermind the lion, 8% of people think they can beat a fucking elephant unarmed?
>sticks two fingers in its trunk
>elephant cant breathe and passes out
Oh gee that was hard
you have bested me
>trunk pops out
god i fucking hate elephants, why cant i have a massive trunk that is basically a 5th appendage that i can also use as a snorkel
it aint fair bros
imagine all the sniffs that you can do on a daily basis.
That's just trapped gasses created by it's decaying body.
>elephant is a mouth breather
>elephants dont have mouths that they can breathe out of
Anyone got the "I could beat an elephant in a fight" copypasta? The one where he dark souls's the elephant by staying behind it and avoiding its back kicks?
Elephants lose to mice, what makes you think a human elephant rider cant beat it. It's a mental game
move the chimp to above wolf
kangaroo/wolf is where I'd top out, I think. I don't have a sense of scale for how big wolves are but I've seen cunts mog roos.
Roos are tough but they kind of give you a fair idea of where and how to stand with their treat pose. Wolves are quadrupeds and will attempt to knock you down and go for the jugular. They're not as retarded when it comes to fighting and killing. They're predators after all.
Chimp is way easier to beat than a wolf. They're shit at doing fatal damage, they're strength is beyond overrated, and they're small. The reason you see mauling stories but not dying stories of fucking elderly women getting attacked by gangs of chimps is because they have no lethality and their only way of hunting is grabbing shit and drawing and quartering and eating it alive.
Wolves have one weapon
Chimps have 5
Those fuckers can sink their teeth and jerk you back with 4 extremities ripping off whatever is in his mouth. Not to mention they have a tendency to pull your balls
So what.
Chimps are small and can be manhandled, and wolves actually know how to kill. Apes are far weaker in physicality and mindset than actual predatory carnivores. Gorillas get killed by leopards, monkeys get killed by tiny ferrets.
A Human beats a similar percentile chimp 90% of the time, Chimps cant kick, chimps cant punch, are weaker and the size of a dwarf.
Theres this retarded view that Humans are some weak animal and could fight of anything, mainly perpetuated by animal loving betas and women.
Chimps are all muscle. They are very strong.
>chinp gives man a lift.gif
Pound for pound they're not much stronger than humans. Absolute strength they're much weaker.
I'd legit want your dumb asses to fight a chimp now. You'd deserve the outcome for being this moronic.
Chimps are stronger pound for pound because they are perma 0% body fat, but in raw strength, humans are going to be stronger because we on average weigh more.
Also, strength is only useful if you can transfer that to an attack all chimps can do is swipe and awkwardly pound (and bite ofc) which are very inefficient compared to punching and kicking
>grabs your arm
>cracks your forearm bone with straight up grip strength
>rips your shoulder out of socket
You are retarded if you think you stand a chance.
You're fucking retarded if that's the best response you could come come with, reasons addressed previously.
I wish I could, I would destroy it and eat its ball sack.
>Chimps cant kick, chimps cant punch
neither can the vast majority human anon. not well, anyways.
You don’t need to do it well, fight a chimp is like fighting a dwarf with downsyndrome, most people could do it.
Remove 7 percentage points from each and you get the actual answers and filter out people who just answered yes to everything because it'd be funny
>24% of men do not believe they could beat a rat in a fight
>you vs
>your weight in rats
okay so have we figured out why women are more confident fighting lions than men yet
those kids grew up to drink lots of vodka id imagine
>crocodile species not listed
??
Anyways. An adult male beats all of these except elephant lion bear chimp and rilla
species not listed
I assume probably either a nile or saltie, neither of which a human can take on in the water. If it’s on land then maybe, but you’d still get fucked up. In water, game over.
>if it's on land maybe
yeah, nah
I would sneak up on him from behind, then quickly jump on his back, WHIP my arm under his neck, and then choke him out like this. gg no re.
also this.
if i get the grizzly in a choke it's over for him.
They probably don't realize how different fighting bare handed, without clothing nor weapons is compared to the opposite. I am sure most able bodied men with a knive and winter attire could easily beat every animal up to the gorilla. At that point the difference in strength is just too great.
>25% of men don't believe they could defeat a fucking rat
its so over for them
To be fair, you gotta catch it
the only real question there is if you can beat a chimpanzee on a naked fist fight, the rest is pretty much unrealistic fights. a goose imagine that.
Yeah...if it enters my guard...I'm pretty much thinking it's done for
>women more confident fighting elephants than men
What do they know that we dont bros?
Americans are all dumb fucktards
Are Americans actually retarded? I thought them being stupid was just a meme
Only 8% of them. 🙁
They can't even point to Canada on a map, of course they're retarded
>believing shitty fake tiktoks
>Are Americans actually retarded?
No more than any other country, but we have a shitty education system and high levels of home 'schooling'.
wrong. pretentious. and home schooling is based.
>t. never been homeschooled
i was isolated for 8 years of my life because i was homeschooled, but you, some retarded city slicker moron that saw his favorite neocon politician tweet about how based homeschooling is because of some trannies in public school, definitely know better than I.
anyone got that webm where a man sticks his finger through the bars of a lions den and the lion bits his finger?
heh
subhuman fuck I hope he gets killed by a lion
If you look at the beginning at the video you can see this guy only has 3.5 fingers left. Meaning this shit has probably happened at least twice before....
slowest reflexes in the world,also fucking retarded for fucking around with an agitated lion.
The tendon being pullet with the finger
fucking retard
the tendon
exists no more brudda
Dude, I'm not even gonna save this one.
>elephant gores a man to death
>leaves
>another man starts throwing rocks at it
Superpower 2020
if he achieved a 4 pl bench press he could have prevented this.
>cameraman putting his watermark over footage of people being mauled
kek. gotta respect the jeet hustle
lion's got AIDS now
Dude's tough for trying to pull what's left of his hand free rather than screaming and flailing hysterically. Not very bright, but tough.
wurrlll starrrrr
whats the right move after your finger is bitten by a lion? ofcourse, the finger is done for, but how do you make sure it doesn't pull out the entire tendon with it?
I think that video is the best you can hope for after your finger is bitten by a lion.
What would actually have happened if he didn't try to pull free? The lion would wander off with his hand in his mouth, turning the black into meat cubes? No but seriously, would he just be pressed in the fence while the lion munches on his hand a couple meters wandered off? I guess the lion would have let go if he didn't struggle after a minute.
Cats tend to like getting all their limbs involved when they bite
I think its possible.I just get so fucking angry sometimes I fly into a rage and lose myself, this boosts my strength. The lion just have his animal instincts while I have this extra surge of power.
>I DON’T HAVE A GIRLFRIEND!!! FUCK YOU LION!!!! RAAAAAA!!
>gets slapped with a clawed paw, all rage is now leaking onto the ground in the form of blood, piss, and shit
>dies
I'd maybe get a kick in it's face before being mauled to death
question is about fistfight, lions don't have fists or even thumbs so easy win for many men, the only enemy is fear
there are many cases where human was attackes by a shark or by a bearm simple jab to the nose made these animals shake in fear and flee. Provided that the lion's mouth is secured with a muzzle and the lion ain't female with baby lions it is absolutely possible to win
how much preparation time do I get?
5min warmup and a pre workout of your choice
gtfo here batman
No. But I could with a sharp rock attached to a stick.
Depends on how many tranq darts is in the lion.
As a over 3 plate bench presser, I am quite sure my pressing strength makes sure any punches to the head would get him confused. So I would keep my distance and only go for the blow when I know he can't get me (as I know it would be deadly). Once I got one or two hits, I would take the opportunity to do a deadlift choke hold (I mean, locking his neck with my arm and performing a deadlift with the purpose of taking his base off, so he would be helpless). A few seconds of no blood flow to be brain and he would be a goner.
he would lazily swipe you with his clawed paw, skinning you alive. benchmorons are delusional, all the exercise chemicals have gone straight to their brain and they think that they're invincible
In a fistfight?
Yes.
Lions don't have fists.
Teeth and claws are cheating.
I win by technicality.
Duh lions dont have fists i have the adfvantage
I mean, lions physically can't fistfight, so they're correct. No clawing or biting allowed, just a good clean fight, good luck kitty.
>realising that 53 posters before me all made the same joke
whelp
>lion mauls you to death
>TKO victory for human
That's cheating, I'll still have the moral victory.
yes they would win the fight by default of having the ability to throw a punch,but the lion would maul them to death immediately after,NOT using anything close to what resembles a fist,therefore you win the fist fight by default.
You dipshits need to read Death in the Long Grass
Yes easily. Fist fuck it's throat with my arm and choke it to death.
I cant but id hype myself that i can and would try its a pretty cool way to go out.
My grandpa died in a shootout with 6 guys and is arguably the coolest dude in my family
Military, police or some criminal situation? That's both a very grim, but also cool way to go out.
Just at the end of ww2 he aided on a ambush on some robbers/looters that failed so they came to kill him,at first they wanted to kill him with bombs and threw one at the front of the stable he was in, he hated bombs and didint want to die to one so he rushed out shooting everywhere and got killed standing.
We dont know much else as the new government just executed them no trial.
>it's another reddit tier animal worship thread
I'm built different. Simple as
Lion killing technique is a thing historically, a human has very likely actually wrestled against a lion and won before in the colosseum.
>Dude you are all HECKIN wrong. You can't beat a feckin heckin flufferino simba because THE FUCKING SCIENCE says YOU CANT. DONT FUCKING EVEN TRY. JUST ROLL OVER IF YOU SEE A LIO-AAAAAAAACK NO WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING RETARDED CHUD HES GOING TO DEVOUR YOU ALIV- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO WHAT THE FUCK DONT JUMP INTO THE CAGE NO YOU SICK BASTARD DONT BASH HIS SKULL OPEN WITH A CLUB NO WHAT ARE YOU DOIIIIIIIING OH MY SCIENCE THIS CANT BE HAPPENING WHAT THE FUCK AM I GOING TO TELL BILL AND MELINDA? NOOOOOO DONT WEAR THE HECKIN PELT ON YOUR HEAD YOU ARE NOT HERCULES HERCULES ISNT REA-AAAAAAAAACK
can a lion beat a mountain? no.
Matthew 17:20
No way... He is a cat and fast as fuck
He you bite your hands that get you by the throat
I passed out by suffocation once (dont ask me why)
You just fade.. you turn off
The is a carnivor predator selected by nature and endured even when conditions are very much deflected from what it should be
We are monkeys that see reptilians shapes when we eat magic mushroons and start to become scared and alert
We are prey and it is even coded inside us
We cant beat a lone lion if he is healty and hungry without a group of others monkeys like us
OH NO NO LIONBROS
I TOLD AI TO SHOW ME WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF A LION FOUGHT A BOXER AND THIS IS WHAT IT GAVE ME
You can just throw rocks and sticks at it. Assuming you start from a decently long distance and it's a semi dense environment like a forest with places to hide or climb and shit to pick up, then the average fit man could probably win.
except no you can't because then you're using weapons and it's no longer a fistfight or w/e. that said you'd think it'd be hard as fuck to hit a lion with meaningful force outside of its lunging range if it's already running at you. Surely at longer ranges a moving lion will just dodge, right?
Weapons assume you bring a premade tool to the fight. Using rocks and sticks is just using the environment to your advantage, no different from climbing a tree or throwing sand in the lion's eyes or hiding in a hole etc. In an open field the lion would win but in a dense environment like a forest it could be 50/50
How do you think homo sapiens defeated their predators?
A weapon in the scenario of a fistfight is using anything but your own body to attack. Yes that even includes throwing sand. Climbing a tree is fine imo, just don't rip it out of the fucking ground and swing it like a club.
>How do you think homo sapiens defeated their predators?
I agree with your implication, but the poll is asking about a fistfight not if people could win a fight using sticks spears and rocks like our ancestors did.
The only human who can a lion with his bare hands is contest peaked Brian Shaw on PCP. And he will probably die in the process.
lmao bro just shut the fuck up. Just because you're a moron that is afraid of cats doesnt mean a normal 6'3 male is going to die fighting a grown pussy. have a nice day.
Yeah easily.
Lions are huge pussies.
We could because lions don't have fists.
>Yin Yang fish (Chinese: 陰陽魚, 糖醋活魚, 呼叫魚; also called dead-and-alive fish) is a dish where a live, scaled fish (usually carp) with its head wrapped in ice cubes is oil-fried whole. The fish is then covered in sauce and served on a plate where its head continues to twitch even after its body has been cooked (likely due to remnant electrical impulses after death).[1][2][3][4]
>It was invented by a Taiwanese whose restaurant in Chiayi, Taiwan sparked outrage when it began serving the dish in 2007, with a city official and members of the public criticizing the cruelty of the dish.[5] Following public outcry, the dish was subsequently removed from the menu and banned in Taiwan.[6][1] A video of a dish in 2009 was condemned by the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals calling a video showcasing it "disgusting".[7] In 2021 the dish had been adopted in mainland China.[1]
I really do not like this. I'm glad taiwanese people shit all over the dish tho
>In 2021 the dish had been adopted in mainland China.
kek of course.
>...In 2021 the dish had been adopted in mainland China.[1]
pottery
Bear outsmarted
I know your feel brother.
Holy shit.
Lions don't have fists
>Nappy hair
women, amirite fellas?
i like how they walk in all nonchalant and scurry away like they've done something wrong
I thought women were the morons of gender, not seagulls.
is he ok
nothing has ever survived a kick from a horse so i'm gonna go with no.
Fuck around and find out.
>NOOO YOU CANT JUST TAKE A TRIP TO AFRICA TO SHOOT LIONS
>THEYRE HECKIN PEACEFUL CATERINOS
>HAKUNA MATTATA NOOOO
Can we be serious for one second. This must be the very worst way to go out. Mother watching child get eaten alive. Child watching mother eaten alive.
Motherhood is the central bond upon which our mammalian lineage is founded.
It seems wrong on a level transcending ordinary violent death. This is spiritually wrong.
>look at me
>I'm the rhino now
>WOAH WOAH WHAT THE FUCK
Revolt against the modern world.
RULES OF NATURE
the funnier thing is 8% of people also believed they could beat an elephant
>im de captain now
If we've agreed to a fist fight and the lion bites me, then he is disqualified for not following the rules of engagement and I win on a technicality. gg too ez. I'm smarter than lions, so we gotta use our intellect to overcome their strength advantage.
The only way is to mentally/spiritually dominate them into obedience. Otherwise, they will shred just about any human. There is a story of a guy in India. A really buff monk that would wander through the jungles punching tigers in the face as part of his spiritual practice. The face punch would immediately humble and scare the attacking tiger. He was the kind of guy that could punch through bricks. Not a lot of people like that. Certainly not 8% of the population
I believe this is somewhat true,a loose pitbull sprinted towards me and fucked off because I stopped walking,stood still and just stared at it,it calmed down and walked away,just told myself it would do no good if I freaked out in that situation.
Forget the lions and elephants. Could you beat a T-rex in a fight?
I probably could. It really just depends on the speed and technique. Imagine Bruce Lee -- he couldn't take many hits from a heavyweight champion, but he could definitely one or two hit KO them with a good kung-fu move.
>Imagine Bruce Lee -- he couldn't take many hits from a heavyweight champion, but he could definitely one or two hit KO them with a good kung-fu move.
heh
for me, it's the boar. these animals are built like small tanks
These fuckers scare me more in Europe than bears, wolves, pumas, vipers, witches and "economic immigrants".
They sliced open my friends leg so bad he needed to go to the ER.
what the fuck, seriously? I some some article posted on here a while back where an eastern yuro got lost while hunting and survived for days by drinking rainwater from his shoe, would hide from these little boar things, etc. I thought the hiding from the little boar things was just him being a goober or something.
Yeah, seriously. They ran him down. He didn't have time to ready his bow. They ran him through with their tusks and sliced up his leg real bad. He went to the ER and got like a dozen stitches. He didn't see any babies. I thought it might explain why they behaved so aggresively. But anyway, after seeing vipers, pumas, wolves and economic immigrants in the wild.. Boars and islamists scare me the most.
In the US you can rent a helicopter and gun them down from the sky.
Get a gun, euro.
I want to. It just takes forever to get one. You have to jump through so many hoops. My family, friends and employer have to vouch for me. I am in the process. All I have now is an excalibur crossbow, a barnett compound bow, a ksb traditional bow, pepper spray and hunting knives.
I am so, so, so jealous of your freedom you have in the USA. Never! Never give it up! Fight any change to your freedom!
extremely based, but low test loser beta males that were bullied in school will hate on the husky for being aggressive, dominant and more of a man than these gays will ever be in their entire lives
>low test loser beta males that were bullied in school will hate on the husky
Common dude, no reason to get angry at the husky, it's just a dog.
What are these?
For any creature, regardless of size or strength, just damage them in their eyes and you win.
you can tell there is literally no complex thought inside that cassowarys brain. im glad we dont have terror birds on earth anymore
cassowarys dont exist anymore dude
>this is what aussies have to tell themselves so they can sleep at night
I could.
Lions don’t have fists.
I love threads like this,you can't really tell who's just fucking around and who's being serious.
>have dog
>13 years old
>tfw knowing she has maybe a year if two left in her
Hey Christians if God is real. Then why don't dogs live much longer
Atheists:1,305,506,612 Christians: 0
:'^(
even bears are more of a good citizen than morons
guess it must have been through there before, saw the cone upright, and then remembered it
Or they observed humans picking up the cone before.
Because he picked it up and then kept walking does imply that he wasn't just playing. It's either what you said or what I said.
The duality of African fauna
wtf am I looking at
I dunno.
What are you looking at?
the duality of animal and man.
Some workers were striking over having to clean up the trash or something, it was a protest. Trash being on the ground was literally a part of the protest. So it's just the typical "pick up this trash" bullying, but obviously the way trash is being picked up is a part of the protest.
that gives the video some context now.I first saw it some months ago.
theyre playing half life 2 in real life
god white people are so pathetic, why even bother at this point? why stick around picking shit up when these morons are just going to throw it out again? what does this gay think he is going to achieve? you can bet his pasty ass is thinking of all the hecking updoots he's going to get on reddit for his "good" behavior. what a fucking tool
this,leave those things to their own devices,they clearly dont want any help in anything since they're obviously so smart and capable of impulse control,long term planning and focus on a massive scale kek!
he's pretty obviously disabled
well obvious to those of us who are not
>Yeah i could totally beat an elephant, just gotta wrestle the trunk and go for the eyes and he'll-ACK
That's entirely too small a cage for a marten or fisher.
That's because 90% of Americans don't know how big a lion actually is. They probably think it's a little bigger than a Saint Bernard or something.
tigers are the ones that really surprise people with their size. or at least thei size surprised me. I probably spent a majority of my life thinking they were smaller than lions.
Brown bears also surprised me
Fuck yeah
Just attack at night
I got attacted by a mountian lion once but before i punched him in the chin and knocked him out in mid air
So i would say yes, it's all about getting the knock out punch before he pounces on you
Didn't that one guy kill a lion by ripping out it's tongue? They have barbs all over their tongues so you'd get a pretty damn good grip.
Looking this up it says an injured leopard. Not a lion.
I challenge it to a fist fight. Then I pull out my gun and punch the lion with my bullet.
to be fair, yes. having a mane will only slow him down.
no
The question isn't "could I?" It's "how many?"
>flexes 'cep